30. Chapter 30
30
L evon held onto me tightly as we navigated through the throng of people. The crowd was thick, and I felt hands brushing against my shoulders, arms, and side as they praised my name with the unmistakable stench of hard liquor on their breath, their thoughts consumed by the festive atmosphere.
Feeling overwhelmed, I begged Levon to take me somewhere, anywhere but here, away from the cacophony and the chaos.
Levon merely smiled in response and guided me away, paying no attention to Jesri's persistent questions, which he continued to shout even as we moved out of earshot. Calum was nowhere to be seen and probably enjoyed the women's attention and free-flowing drinks.
My dress kept catching on the bodies pressed tightly against one another, making our progress slow and cumbersome. The crowd radiated with excitement, their energy tangible as they pushed forward, eager to reach the front where the betting was about to commence. The air was thick with anticipation, the noise of chatter and laughter blending into a continuous roar.
My stomach churned with anxiety, knowing that tomorrow , I would embark on the lifelong mission Jesri had set for me.
I forced myself to silence these rising fears as more people applauded me. Some even bowed deeply, and by the time they straightened up, I was already gone, no longer there to acknowledge their gestures. I didn't feel guilty or care about any of them. They were dancing, flattering, drinking, and laughing, living as if they had no concerns or cared little about anything beyond their revelry. It disgusted me, especially knowing children were starving in the streets and mothers struggling alone to care for them.
Levon must have noticed the disgust on my face because he glanced back, tugged on my arm, and gave me a sympathetic smile.
"How can so many people fit in here?" I shouted to him as we continued to make our way through the crowd.
"By pushing and shoving," he replied with a chuckle, demonstrating as he cleared a path for us.
We finally emerged into the open air, free from the tightly packed bodies. As we rushed into the empty city streets, the lights around us seemed more alive than the sweaty, chaotic crowd we left behind.
"How is the king supposed to control any of that?" I asked, still catching my breath.
Levon slowed our pace and came up beside me, taking my arm and pulling me close.
"He doesn't," he said with a wry smile.
I furrowed my brow in confusion. "What do you mean?"
He continued, "King Thealor only allows the ruckus as long as the people obey the rules. If they don't, more severe measures are taken."
"How does one control a crowd of thousands?" I pressed, genuinely curious and slightly horrified.
"Extreme force," he replied. Seeing the shock on my face, he quickly added, "Everyone knows the consequences, so they clear the square by one in the morning and continue their festivities elsewhere. We…they haven't had to use those extreme measures yet."
I nodded, still processing his words as we continued through the vibrant, quiet city. The contrast between the silent streets and the unruly crowd we'd left behind relieved my quelling stomach.
We strolled through a secluded, illuminated cobblestone archway flanked by vibrant, colorful houses. "Did you ever enjoy yourself during these festivities?" I asked, trying to ease my anxiety.
"Only in the early days of my employment, but I grew weary of it," Levon replied, his tone somber. I nudged his shoulder playfully, taking in the crisp night air as his expression turned serious. "You had me really worried earlier. I didn't realize the depth of it all. I…I don't know how to break you out of this—"
"I don't expect you to break me out of anything," I interrupted, halting abruptly. Clinging to hope, I refused to let despair about the future take hold—a future without him.
He turned me to face him and gently lifted my chin with his fingers. "My Regina," he whispered into the warm night air. "You are still worth every agonizing year of waiting, and I can wait a little longer." Cupping my face in his hands, his eyes filled with concern for what tomorrow might bring, for the inevitability of Jesri's tight grasp. "I will not fail you, Eliah. I made that vow long, long ago, and I will uphold it forever ."
My heart raced at his proximity, longing for his lips to draw nearer, wishing to escape into a dream world where we were just ordinary people again, untouched by the complexities of our current existence, where we could defy the odds and live a simple life together.
With a heavy heart, I closed my eyes, feeling a wave of despair wash over me, and gently pushed away from his embrace.
"No matter what path I choose, you're not a part of it," I said bitterly. The pain in my words cut deep. It surged through me, coursing through my veins and settling in my heart. "We were never meant to be. This," I gestured between us, "was never supposed to happen."
I took a deep breath, my voice trembling. "Jesri will find out. And I can't allow myself to let you throw your life away for me. Save your money, your estate, your people—" Faces flashed through my mind: Saasha, Elise, Aveal, Edmon. "They need you."
" I need you, " he retorted, his eyes darkening with an irritation I hadn't seen before. He stepped back, running his fingers through his hair in frustration. "I need you," he repeated, his voice strained.
His face contorted with the growing despair of a life neither of us wanted. A life thrust upon me, filled with dark Magics and relentless pursuers of the Onyx Market.
It was unfair, all of it.
My frustration grew, with tears threatening to spill. How utterly exhausted I was of this life.
"I need you, Eliah. We all do," he said, his voice barely audible over the clamor of the crowd behind us chanting a song. "You—" he paused, reconsidering his words. "I…I know your—"
I waited, staring into his eyes, full of confusion and remorse. His mouth opened and closed as he struggled to find the right words. My thoughts were a tangled mess, my heart raging in all directions, torn between hope and despair.
"Your life isn't ideal," he began, his voice trembling with emotion as if he was withholding something from me. "It keeps dealing you a bad hand, over and over again. But you keep going. You still believe in a better world, a better life." He stepped closer, taking my hands in his, his grip warm and reassuring. "You will achieve that life, Eliah. I know it. With all my heart, I do."
The tears flowed freely, my raw pain mingling with hope, reopening that crater within me that still longed for that world, whether in this life or the next.
He took my face in his hands and gently kissed away my tears. "Don't lose sight of that dream," he said softly. "One day, you'll understand everything—the pain, the anger, the training, all the depressing days, and the long hours. It will all make sense. Keep fighting, keep going, and remember who you are: my Regina."
"I'm falling for you because of your light, Eliah. Be the source of light in this darkening world, and know that you are a beacon for goodness. Don't succumb to the darkness. You fight—let your anger guide you rather than try to suppress it. Embrace this unrelenting side to you and let it ignite your spirit. When you do, it will free you."
He pressed his forehead against mine, and his own tears began to fall. "I promise you," he whispered, his lips brushing mine in the faintest touch. We shared a breath before he pulled away, wiping his tears.
We lingered in that shared moment, drawing strength from each other, ready to face whatever came next.
"We should head back. Casmir needs to talk with us, and Admearin demands to see you before…tomorrow."
I nodded, letting his words sink into my racing heart as he led me back into the crowd of sweaty bodies.
We found them by the long table of sweets amidst the chatter of other guests who were at Levon's party. As they spotted us, their faces lit up.
"Eliah!" Admearin exclaimed, hurrying over to pull me into an embrace. Her short hair was elegantly pinned up with gold beads, complementing her flowing purple gown that hugged her figure.
"You looked like a true queen up there," she remarked, admiring my stunning dress and the king's black gem necklace that still felt like hands around my throat. "It's not fair for someone to look that beautiful."
"I'll say," I replied, gesturing to her equally stunning gown. She blushed but said nothing as she led me over to Casmir and Levon, who were already engaged in deep conversation.
Admearin cleared her throat, catching Casmir's attention. He looked up and took me in with a warm smile.
"You were spectacular up there. A true star," he said, kissing my hand gently.
I blushed, feeling a wave of warmth at his compliment. Glancing at the massive but fading crowd, I took a deep breath. Admearin looped her arm through mine, leading me away from Levon's worried gaze. I could sense his silent message: Later, his eyes seemed to say as he returned to his conversation with Casmir. My stomach coiled.
"Please tell me you've tried the confections? The flavor is exquisite," Admearin exclaimed with a grin.
I shook my head, mustering a smile. "I can't imagine stomaching anything right now, if I'm honest."
She patted my arm reassuringly. "Well, you'll just have to win this wretched thing so the king can bathe you in all the sweets."
Forcing another smile, I recalled what the king had said, not just during our presentation but also at last night's dinner: May Tarragon grant your path.
What did that mean? Tarragon—why did that sound so familiar? Perhaps Tarragon was a king, or noble faded away with the history of all those Magics. A history that should be known.
No, that's not it.
Swallowing hard in the stifling air, I longed to escape this dress, this crowd.
"I've never seen you in action, but based on all Levon has said, I know you'll do marvelously, dear. Believe in yourself," Admearin said, her voice soft with encouragement.
"Do you know who Tarragon is?" I blurted out, desperate for something to ground me in reality, craving answers, even if they were wrong.
"Tarragon?" she echoed, eyebrows furrowing in thought.
"At the feast last night and up there," I gestured toward the high balcony jutting out of the castle. "The king said: 'May Tarragon grant your path to victory.' I don't remember much from my childhood history lessons, but I can't recall anything about Tarragon."
She furrowed her brows in thought, searching her memory for any clue. "I can't recall either. Perhaps Casmir or Levon might," she suggested, pulling me back towards them.
I appreciated her sincerity, her friendship feeling more genuine than Calum's. I dismissed the thought as we interrupted the men's conversation once more.
"Darling, do you know who Tarragon was?" Admearin shouted over the racket of the crowd. Casmir turned toward her, his green suit complementing his eyes and silver hair.
"I don't think it's a 'who' but rather a 'what,'" Casmir replied. "As far as I know, Tarragon is a spice most used in baking or cooking; said it adds a spicier bite to it."
My heart plummeted into my stomach as I recalled the little black drawing of a dragon on the spice Elise used to season the chicken. My head spun as their conversation continued.
"Well, that doesn't add up," Admearin remarked, casting a doubtful glance at me. "What does the king mean by ' may Tarragon grant your path to victory?'"
"Little Dragon," I muttered, interrupting, feeling the weight of its significance pressing down on me. May the dragon grant your path to victory. I sucked in a deep breath as my head spun with anxiety.
Admearin and Levon looked at me inquisitively, but Casmir's eyes widened with sudden realization, a fear that sent shivers down my spine. "Tarragon is known for its strong flavor, earning it another name: The Little Dragon."
I stepped back, my gaze rising to meet Levon's as the color drained from his face, confirming my worst fears. Admearin gasped beside me, and suddenly, the world around me seemed to blur into chaotic motion.
This morning, the basket of fruit left by the king was filled with dragon fruit.
Dragon .
I stumbled backward, feeling dizzy and overwhelmed. Levon quickly reached out, grabbing my arm with a fierce grip. His eyes were ablaze with a mix of anger and disbelief.
"It can't be. It—it can't," I whispered, my voice barely audible over the noise of the crowd.
Levon's eyes met mine, searching for his own explanation.
Edmon knew it was some kind of creature…but a dragon ?
It couldn't be. It had to be a mistake. Dragons didn't exist—or at least, they weren't supposed to. Neither were the Breva, Miehja, or any other creatures summoned by Them.
"H-how does one fight a dragon?" I rasped, the words escaping me almost involuntarily. Acid burned my throat as a flicker of fear seized its way in, but my anger wrapped around it, choking it off before it could burrow deeper and steal my breath.
Levon turned to Casmir, whose own eyes reflected the same fear. Then he looked back at me, scanning the crowd frantically for a way out. His panic was palpable, etched across every line of his body. When he met my eyes again, they were filled with worry.
"I promise you, we'll find a way," Levon rasped, his voice trembling and trailing off in an empty promise that filled my soul with dread.
"I need a drink," I panted, pushing through the crowd.
My heart thundered in my ears as bodies jostled me, buckling my knees and leaving me gasping for air, for relief from this—this life. Tears welled up, blurring my vision as Levon crouched down beside me, placing a gentle hand on my back as shock seized my body, rattling my breath.
"Breathe," Levon whispered, helping me rise as a loud bell rang out in the distance. The crowd fell silent, parting like a curtain as the balcony doors swung open, revealing a brilliant light and the silhouette of the king.
"My dear people! What a pleasure it has been to host such a special year with such special contestants," the king's voice boomed. "The betting has ended. Give your last wishes to our vigilant contenders." Cheers erupted, drowning out the tempest within me. Levon held me tighter, holding me close.
"And to our dear contestants, please return immediately to the front gates. Thank you!" With a wave, King Thealor disappeared through the doors, leaving a surge of excitement as people clamored to glimpse the contestants one last time.
My feet turned to stone, resisting every effort to move with the crowd's relentless pull. Clutching onto Levon, I locked into my memory his scent, the sensation of his soft touch, the strength of his heart.
He turned me into his chest and wrapped me in his arms, shielding us from the tumultuous sea of people, the cacophony of voices, and the looming tide of fear that shook us both. They could never erode the hope we clung to, the dreams we both cherished yet knew were doomed to fail.
"Remember your light, Eliah," he implored, his voice quivering with emotion. "Harness your anger and channel it. You control it, " he cried out, his words stifled by his tears. "I'm so sorry," he breathed against my neck, his embrace trembling with emotions as raw as my own. "I didn't know."
Enveloped in a frenzied hush, we were washed forward by the crowd. Dark tendrils clawed at my mind, threatening to consume me once more as I stumbled forward until I reached the front gates with the others. Following the guards inside, we were greeted by the king's smile, a portent of the trials that awaited us.
Levon stepped back, positioning himself behind me as the other contestants filtered in, their mentors trailing behind them. Despite the gravity of the situation, they all wore smiles and exuded excitement, as if they weren't about to willingly step into the jaws of death.
"My spectacles, you performed admirably," the king expressed, his smile taking on a darker edge. "What a display you shall all provide."
Two footmen emerged with a clap of his hands, bearing trays of small glasses filled with a swirling blue liquid.
"As our final toast," the king declared, gesturing toward the drinks. The contestants reached for a glass one by one, swirling the liquid within as it shimmered in the light as the sponsors stood by watching.
Timidly, I took a glass, gritting my teeth as I forced myself to calm my breathing.
Inhale.
Exhale.
"To our land of Creos," the king proclaimed, raising his glass. The other contestants followed suit, echoing his sentiment. "May we usher in a new era of civility and compassion for all within our beloved kingdom."
"To our beloved kingdom!" Several contestants cheered in unison.
"To civility!"
"To compassion!"
I lifted my drink a little higher, forcing down the trembling in my fingers.
To a better world.
Lowering my arm, I brought the glass to my lips and downed the blue liquid in one swift gulp. Not allowing myself to enjoy its sparkling flavor or to let my anger spark as all the contestants clapped, handing their empty glasses back to the footmen, who quickly rushed away as if they, too, could not stand to be under the stare of the king who now smiled sinisterly.
I swallowed, feeling an overwhelming tug tether me to some unknown oblivion as something within me stirred, sputtering and reaching for me as if begging for release.
Struggling against the hollowness that began to swell in my ears, I fought to draw in a breath, but each inhale felt like a strenuous effort. A heavy weight settled over me as I staggered backward, my weakening body no longer able to keep me standing. Darkness pulsated through me as I felt Levon's presence grasp me while I spiraled down into a heavy abyss.
With a rasping cough, I managed to utter a plea, but my words were lost in the thickening haze of my fading consciousness. My vision was beginning to blur as the shadows closed in, surrendering to the inevitable, and collapsing in a mindless heap.
Oblivion beckoned with a soothing embrace.