Chapter Twenty-Two
The long Fourth of July weekend was forecast to be hot as balls, and since it was only Wednesday and his brothers were cranky already, Rob knew it was going to feel a month long.
The campground was already half-full in the middle of the week.
The rest of their reservations would be arriving sometime between noon and midnight the next day.
Half of the seasonal campers were staying the full week, and quite a few of them had guests or family staying with them for the holiday.
And the air-conditioning in the house was definitely not up to the task of keeping it even reasonably cool.
So far the only positive to this day was the fact he’d started the morning in Hannah’s bed. They’d made love before falling asleep nestled together, and then they’d made love again this morning. And because her camper’s AC was top-notch, they’d done it all without getting too sweaty.
It wasn’t the first time they’d made love in her camper since Erika left, but it was the first time he’d spent the night there.
It had been wonderful, but he could feel the void in their relationship now—the space where the conversations about the future were supposed to be, but weren’t because they both knew there wasn’t one.
He tried not to focus on that space, but to enjoy every day he did have with her. It wasn’t always easy.
Joey was at the counter, doing the tedious task of emailing each seasonal site their electric bill for the previous month.
He’d come up to take care of that and to help check people in, but he was going home tomorrow night.
While he’d offered to stay for the entire weekend, it would be his first Independence Day with Ellie and Nora, and the little girl was obsessed with seeing the fireworks.
They didn’t want him to miss it, but there simply wasn’t space for them to join Joey at the campground that week.
For the moment, though, he was spending his time muttering about automating some of their systems someday.
And when Brian walked in, Rob could tell from the way he swung the door closed behind him that his mood had gotten even worse since the last time he saw him.
Stella went to her water dish, but Brian walked the width of the store, looking down both aisles to ensure there were no campers present. They’d already learned that lesson.
Then he pointed at Rob. “If the guy from site eight goes in the pool without hosing off the trail dirt first one more time, I’m going to hold him under until the bubbles stop.”
“Okay,” Rob said. “I’m calling not it for explaining that to the insurance company, though.”
It wasn’t a good sign that the group from site eight were only on day three of a weeklong stay and Brian already wanted to drown one of them.
It hadn’t even really gotten hot yet. They were going to see the heat index breaking triple digits on Friday and Saturday, but it was only ninety right now. Only.
“Danny’s calling again,” Joey said, holding up his cell phone.
Rob sighed. Danny hadn’t come up for the busy weekend because of his book, and it was the right decision—he’d never been expected to be there—but he felt guilty so he kept checking in to see if they needed him, after all.
Brian cursed and took the phone from Joey, sliding the bar to answer it. “What now?”
Rob gestured for him to put it on speakerphone so he and Joey could hear both ends of the conversation, but Brian wasn’t looking at him.
“Yes, we’re busy. No, we’re not busy enough to need you even though you keep interrupting us to ask if we’re busy.
” He listened for a moment and then snorted.
“What you can actually do to help us is finish that book and then sell another book, and when you get that shiny advance, buy us some air conditioners that actually blow cold air.”
Then he hung up and took a deep breath. “Okay, I feel a little better.”
Joey gave him a dry look. “That’ll be a big comfort to me while I’m fielding pissed-off texts from Danny all day. Use your own phone next time.”
“I’ll drive down there and smash his phone if he doesn’t stop,” Brian said. Then he chuckled. “I almost hope I have to do that because my truck has great AC and it’s a long drive.”
When Brian sank into a chair and put his feet up on the table, Rob saw his opening. “All three of us don’t need to be in here generating body heat for the AC to blow back at us. I’m going to get some fresh air, even if it feels like I’m in a sauna.”
“Tell her we said hi,” Joey said, and Brian snickered.
He took his time walking through the campground so he wouldn’t show up at Hannah’s door drenched with sweat.
People waved to him and he waved back, happy that everybody seemed to be in a good mood.
Luckily, they seemed to have more families than groups of adults here for the holiday.
There was usually less alcohol involved—or at least it was consumed more responsibly.
Hannah’s truck was there, so he assumed the door was closed because the AC was on. He knocked on it, and faintly heard her asking who it was. When he called back to her, she told him to come in.
He stepped up into the blessed cool air and yanked the door closed behind him before any could escape. She didn’t keep it chilled, by any means, because she didn’t like the sound of it running, but it was a blessed relief for him.
“I’ll be right out,” she called from behind the closed bathroom door. “I just got out of the shower.”
Rob was about to answer when his gaze landed on a notebook on the dinette. He shouldn’t be reading it, but Hannah had left it out. He hadn’t touched it at all. It was just there, drawing his attention.
The page was a mess, but he could see it was some kind of decision tree, with lots of arrows and annotations. Pros and cons. Going with her gut as to leaving her podcast the way it was or changing it obviously hadn’t brought her to a conclusion, so now she was trying to use logic and data.
The projected income data was interesting.
She’d potentially be leaving a lot of money on the table—for both her and Erika—if she chose not to introduce current true crime to her podcast. He also noted the figures in the bottom corner included office and recording space.
Up until now, he’d assumed a podcast could be done from anywhere, and he’d wondered more than once if they boosted their internet, if she could do her part from here.
But nowhere on the page was his name—either as a pro or a con. There were no doodles about how he factored into the equation. There weren’t any notations about loving New England and it being rich in historical fodder. There was nothing at all to indicate she’d even considered staying.
Summer fling.
No matter how many times those two words had echoed through his mind, he could tell they hadn’t really stuck. If they had, it wouldn’t hurt so much to look at the plans Hannah was making that didn’t include even thinking about him.
Because she’d meant them. Erika had used the words because Hannah had, and that’s all he was to her. The last two months had been about having fun while she was in New Hampshire, and he wondered if she’d even glance in her rearview mirror when it was time to go.
The pain was so intense he could barely take a full breath, but he clenched his hands into fists and did his best to push it down.
She’d made him no promises. On the contrary, it had been clear to him the entire time that she was going back to California, and she’d never given him a sign she was wavering.
He couldn’t do this for another month. Every single day since they’d met he’d fallen further and further in love with her. Every time they kissed. Every time they laughed. Every time she gave him that sizzling smile that was only for him. There were a lot of days between now and the end of July.
There was no sense in putting his feelings on her.
She clearly had enough on her mind and since he wasn’t a factor, what good would it do to pile his emotions on top of it all.
All he could do was make as clean a cut as possible now so she could spend the rest of her time here focused on what mattered to her and he could. ..miss her.
The bathroom door opened, releasing the scent of her soap and shampoo into the main cabin of the camper. He closed his eyes briefly, inhaling the smell of her, and then he braced himself and turned to face her.
Hannah was in shorts and a tank top, her wet hair piled on her head and held with one of those puffy elastics. Her skin glowed and her smile was bright, but it faded quickly. It only took her a few seconds to see something was wrong.
“Hey,” she said with a nervous smile. “What’s going on?”
“Not much.” He touched his fingertips to the notebook, turning it slightly. “You’ve got a lot of planning going on.”
She sighed, scowling at the notebook. “Can’t make an informed decision without being informed, but that woman is really into information.”
“I see that.”
When her gaze returned to his face, the frown smoothed out, except for a tiny crinkle between her eyebrows. “Are you coming over later tonight? I can turn the AC up a little. You look flushed.”
“No, I’m not coming.” They were some of the hardest words he’d ever said, and it was only going to get harder.
“What’s going on, Rob?” she asked in a quiet voice, that crinkle between her eyebrows deepening. “Just tell me.”
“Look,” he said, because the only way to do this was to rip the bandage off and hope he didn’t emotionally bleed to death in front of her.
“We’re busy right now and I haven’t been giving my brothers one hundred percent.
And you have a lot on your plate and some big decisions to make before you go home. ”
“What are you saying?”
Rob looked into her eyes and forced himself to say the words. “We had a fun summer fling, but I think it’s run its course. I need to focus on the business and I can’t have any more distractions.”