Chapter 45 #2
“I guess he prefers having hips to hold on to while he’s being ridden,” I said flatly, dropping my gaze from her once I was satisfied with her look of pure shock. Then, just to shove it in further, I resumed eating my pastry.
She actually looked amused, not pissed like I had hoped.
“Interesting. He always liked to do the fucking when he was with me,” she provoked, her lips curving into a devious half-grin.
Don’t vomit, Maeve. She is just trying to get a rise out of you.
“Maybe you just weren't good at it,” I shot back.
Sawyer arrived just in time. “Awfully early to be talking about sex, don’t you think?”
Finally, somewhat frazzled, Samara’s smile vanished when Stella walked in behind him. “Awfully early to be having sex, don’t you think?”
Sawyer shrugged as he took the seat beside me—not Stella—and swiped my half-eaten muffin, stuffing the whole thing into his mouth. “This bitch giving you a hard time, Maevey baby?” he asked, kicking his boots up on the table while he chewed.
Was that all it took for Sawyer and me to return to normal? Him hooking up with a rebound? Or two rebounds, rather?
“No. She just seems a little self-conscious, that's all,” I answered.
Samara threw her head back and full on cackled. “Oh, darling, I am far from self-conscious. I’m just trying to understand how he could go from fucking me, to fucking you.” She shook her head, her black hair swaying side to side. “We're just so different.”
Anger at last boiled up inside of me, starting at my toes and almost reaching the top of my skull where it threatened to blow out of me like lava.
Clasping my hands together, I dug my nails into my skin to keep some form of control.
“I think it makes perfect sense, actually.
No one's saying you aren't beautiful, Samara. But I have a feeling that if you were to be gutted, all that would be inside is ash and tar.” She opened her lips to speak, but I kept going.
“You may have known Sebastian longer than me, but I know him better than you ever could. And I know that he isn’t so shallow as to choose someone purely for their looks over what's on the inside. And if you were to gut me, you would be shocked at how pretty and sparkling my organs look.”
I ignored Stella’s flawless grimace. Someone had a weak stomach.
“And I know I’m not as slim as you, but I am beautiful, and screw you for trying to make me feel like I’m not,” I added, turning my attention away from Samara’s furrowed brows.
“What kind of disgusting analogy is that?” Stella garbled in the background.
“Listen, if it makes you feel better, then you can hate me all you want for having exactly what you wish you could. But hating me won’t change anything.
If Sebastian wanted to be with you, he would have kept you around the first time.
It’s not my fault you don’t have enough redeeming qualities for him to fall in love with you,” I finished with a sharp exhale.
Harsh? Maybe. The truth? Absolutely.
“Damn.” Sawyer snickered, running a palm down his face as he tried not to chuckle. “Sorry, Samara, but she’s right. In fact, I think I recall Seb saying something after he ended things with you about how you were a conniving bitch. Pretty sure you were just a subpar lay for him.”
I cringed, but held my poised posture.
With Sawyer getting the last word, Samara huffed and she rose to her feet. Her heels clicked as she stormed out of the room, leaving her cup of tea to cool on the table.
Stella cleared her throat, dragging Sawyer’s and my eyes towards her high cheekbones. She was a pretty girl, although I liked her much better with clothes on. “That wasn’t very nice of you two.”
“She is the opposite of nice,” Sawyer grumbled.
“She is just having a hard time coming to terms with seeing Sebastian with someone else,” Stella retorted, her eyes begging for—and not receiving—any more of Sawyer’s attention.
“When you have a hard time with something, it usually helps to talk to your friends or a shrink,” he shot back without looking at her.
Stella rolled her eyes, then left as quickly as she came.
“Those two are friends, I take it?” I asked when she was gone.
Sawyer nodded as he reached across the table for a ripe, yellow pear. “Yup. Both mega bitches, too. If I didn’t know better, I’d think Samara and Stella were twins instead of Samara and Azain.”
I slumped back into my seat, breathing deeply to try and calm myself. I knew what she said was just to get a rise out of me, but her words hurt all the same. “What were Sebastian's other exes like?” I asked, immediately regretting it. I didn’t really want to know. It didn’t matter. Not really.
Sawyer turned in his seat to face me. He pointed a finger at me, his green eyes stuck in a sternly serious manner.
“Don’t do that. Don’t sit here and try to compare yourself.
What you said was true—Sebastian cares about what's on the inside, but Maeve…he thinks you are the most beautiful being to ever step foot on this planet.” He laid a hand on my shoulder.
“And he is right. Please don’t ever forget that. ”
The corner of my lip curved up. “Thanks, Sawyer.”
He nodded, then cleared his throat as his arm slid off of me. “Are you ready to train?”
I groaned, burying my face into my hands. “Not really, but I need to. I haven’t tried wielding in a while.” Specifically the cosmos. I tended to refrain from using them as much as possible due to my lack of complete control, but something told me that wouldn’t fly for much longer.
“Yeah. We’re gonna need you to save our asses if all hell breaks loose.” Sawyer jumped to his feet, taking a bite of his fruit and marching towards the exit.
After swiping an apple from the fruit bowl I hurried after him. “So.”
He didn’t turn around. “So what?”
“You know,” I inferred, dragging out the words.
Keeping his strides long, he turned his head just enough for me to see his raised eyebrow. “I don’t know.”
I dropped my arms to my sides. “Stella?”
“Oh.” His face tensed when he looked over his shoulder at me. “What about her? I already told you it was a one-time thing.”
I took another bite of my fruit. Where exactly was I going with this? “I know. I’m just kind of surprised…I guess.”
“Why?” His shoulders scrunched. “You shouldn’t be. Usually when someone turns you down, you move on. Did you want me pining over you forever?”
“No. I just…” I shouldn’t have started this discussion, but alas, here I was, starting conversations I would later on regret. Something I was fairly good at. “We should probably talk about it. What you said on our way here.”
Sawyer froze in the middle of the hallway, just feet from the entrance to Mealioria’s arena. He spun to face me. “No. We probably shouldn’t.”
My foot nervously tapped against the tile beneath me as I said what I would to any friend that just had their heart broken. “Sawyer. It’s okay if you…aren’t okay.”
He tossed his head back and scoffed. “I thought me fucking someone else and calling you Maevey baby made it clear, but apparently not.” He crossed his arms over his chest and blew out a deep breath as his stare settled onto me.
“I just needed to get my feelings off my chest, and I did. So we’re good.
Okay? Let’s just move on from the past few weeks, please. ”
The look on my face made it clear that I wasn’t convinced.
“I’m already over it. Seriously,” he claimed, though the higher pitch of his voice hinted at his attempt in deflecting.
“But—”
He held a finger up. “No buts. Now shut up and get your ass in that arena so I can kick it.” He gestured to the doorway with a wide-eyed look.
“Okay. Fine.” I stomped past him. “In that case, you know Sebastian is still pissed at you, right?” The whole situation was still stressing me out, and since we were fine, I was going to talk to my friend about it.
His footsteps echoed behind me. “Thanks for reminding me. He hardly spoke to me the whole time he was here, but I’d almost forgotten.”
The maroon sparring mat squished and creased under my boots when I stepped onto it. “You should have a talk with him when he gets back.” I flopped down to the ground to tighten the laces of my boots. “I kinda rehashed everything the other night in the midst of my own insecurities.’”
Sawyer’s eyes widened slightly. “Oh?”
Pushing back to my feet, I shrugged. “He didn't explicitly say so, but I don’t think the reminder that you kissed me was a welcome one.”
“I’ve kissed plenty of women. And men. Not a big deal.”
“Not to you maybe. But I’m sure it is to him.” Even if he wouldn't say it to my face.
“He’s kissed lots of women, too.”
My mouth drew into a tight line as the muscles of my jaw locked. “Thanks for that reminder,” I sneered.
“Right back to the way things were,” Sawyer commented, his sarcasm lingering on his tongue.
With a scowl, I nodded and raised my fists in preparation. “What’s the plan?”
“Free reins. Do whatever you want. I just don’t really want to be turned into stardust, so no pressure.”
“No pressure.” My brows furrowed with my scoff. “You know my control is ass when it comes to that side of my power. I shouldn't use that kind of magic here anyway.”
“It’s better than it used to be.”
“It’s still not all that great.”
He shrugged. “Maybe so, but I also know that you are like…part god or something, so you definitely have the capability of control within you, you just have to find it. Just try it once. No one is around.”
Closing my eyes, I went to that familiar, dark abyss in my mind that was calm and quiet. Fully relaxing myself, I drew the power of Blythe into my body. My constellastones twitched, vibrating my cheek as the full extent of the cosmos caused my veins to swell.
Starlight burst out of me, shooting in a steady, sparkling stream right at Sawyer who, thank the gods, blocked the blow with a heavy shield of water.
I dropped my arms, tossing my mental shields up to block out his power should he try to attack me unexpectedly. “How was that?”
He nodded, his shaggy hair dipping into his eyes. “Not too shabby. I think you singed my arm though.” He looked down at his right arm and blew on the smoking hairs.
“You asked for it. Good block, though. I could have killed you,” I replied indifferently.
Sawyer chuckled. “You knew I would be able to block that…right?”
“Yeah. For sure,” I answered, though my tone was sarcastic and not nearly convincing.
His eyebrow twitched. “One more time? Let’s aim at a mannequin though. Okay?” His nerves fought their way into his words.
“Scared, Sinclair?” I taunted, wiggling my fingers at him.
“Yeah, a little bit, actually. You can control the fucking stars and see into dying people’s minds. That’s scary as all hell.”
Someone else's voice rang in my ears. “The stars?”
My head followed Sawyer’s in a race towards the doorway.
“You’re going to need to elaborate on that if you expect to stay in my kingdom for another night.” King Franlow’s low tone echoed through the arena.