32
Maika
Ibiza. Day ten of the trip.
“I’m completely serious when I say this: this trip should end with a medal for each of us,” declares Gonzalo, raising the butter knife as if he were King Arthur himself brandishing Excalibur.
“A medal for what? For surviving the double shifts?” asks Lara.
“For surviving without going crazy. That’s enough,” he corrects her, pointing the knife at her. “It seems you’re forgetting everything we’ve been through.”
The most decisive day of the entire journey begins with Gonzalo and his usual nonsense as he eats his toast as if the end of the world were coming in a few hours.
The Marine IV moves steadily forward as it cuts through the waters of the Balearic Islands, and the silhouette of Ibiza begins to take shape on the horizon.
Outside, the morning sun peeks timidly through the portholes of the crew mess hall—this blessed belowdecks corner where a million battles are also fought.
Today we’ve thrown protocol to the wind and pushed two tables together, just to get a little human warmth before the final judgment.
Next to me, Helen is much quieter than usual. Her eyes are fixed on her cup, as if she were expecting the coffee grounds to predict something. I know her, and I know she’s mulling something over. She shoots me fleeting, sidelong glances, and I suppose it has to do with that damn promotion.
As I play with my cup in my hands, I feel my stomach completely knot up.
Today we’re going to be in the hot seat, and all I want is for this damn competition to be over once and for all. No matter how much my professional future might shatter this love that’s been reborn.
“Listen, Maika,” Leo whispers to me, putting on a face of utter drama. “Do you think that when one of you becomes the new boss, she’s going to keep letting us get away with these secret breakfasts?”
“Well, it’ll all depend on which boss you end up with,” I reply, shrugging as I watch Helen’s reactions.
“If she wins, you can forget about it,” Nico jokes, reaching for another piece of toast. “She’d probably make us fill out a form in triplicate just to move a chair.”
The group bursts into laughter, and Helen points her teaspoon at him, narrowing her eyes.
“Don’t give me any ideas, Nico, because I’m quite capable of putting that into practice tomorrow.”
During this moment of glory, the morning feels like a typical day on the voyage. It’s the kind of scene I’d keep tucked away in my heart forever. Especially seeing Helen smile that way—a smile only I have the privilege of knowing intimately.
However, my chest tightens again the moment I look at her intently.
I love her so much. I love her when she’s in drill sergeant mode, and I love her when she tries to act like an ordinary human being.
I love her with her doubts, with her fears, and with those silences where it seems like she’s about to confess the secret of her life to me, only to backtrack and spout another stock phrase.
But right now, fear gets the better of me.
Because self-love is very nice, yes, but it doesn’t pay the bills at the nursing home.
And the letdown wipes the smile off my face.
Helen’s eyes seek mine as if she’d read what’s going on inside me.
“Maika… are you okay?”
“Yes, don’t worry,” I lie, holding her gaze.
Gonzalo, who either doesn’t notice a thing or is the most strategic guy on the ship, starts spinning a story about a passenger who threw a fit at him yesterday because he wanted the captain to stop the cruise ship in the middle of the sea since he’d left his sunglasses in a shop at the terminal.
The group bursts out laughing, but Helen doesn’t take her eyes off me.
Suddenly, the communicator on her belt starts beeping. A second later, mine does too. And right after that, our phones vibrate on the table with a synchronicity that’s downright creepy.
Leo stares at his cup with a face like he’s at a funeral.
“Please, don’t let the passenger deck be flooded again.”
Nico crosses himself with a paper napkin. But it’s a message summoning Helen and me to the lounge on Deck 9.
“Well,” Lara says tenderly, breaking the ice, “whatever happens, know that I’m so proud of you. Both of you.”
“And a textbook pair of drama queens—let’s not forget that detail,” adds Nico, who’d die if he didn’t get in that little dig.
“That too, why deny it?” Lara concedes with a smile.
Gonzalo stares intently at the two of us.
“The only thing you have to do…” he says, drawing out his words, “is not let this damn ship turn you into idiots.”
Helen and I look at him at the same time, surprised.
“I mean, more idiots than you already are fresh out of the factory,” he jokes.
And we can’t help but laugh. Helen leans toward me again to whisper:
“I need to tell you something important before we go into that office.”
She doesn’t have time to say anything else because my phone starts ringing like crazy.
I look at the screen and my blood runs cold when I see that I’m getting a call—again—from that damn nursing home.
“Give me a moment,” I announce, jumping up from my chair with such force that the legs squeak against the dining room floor.
I take a few steps into the hallway, just enough to have some privacy, but feeling Helen’s eyes fixed on the back of my neck.
“Hello? Good morning.”
“Maika, good morning, sweetheart. I was calling to let you know that we’ve just confirmed the first payment for your grandmother’s rehabilitation plan has been received. In fact, the medical team will start the physical therapy sessions this very week without fail.”
I’m stunned. The hum of the ship’s engines fades from my ears.
“What?” I ask, my brain short-circuiting. “You already have the deposit? But I haven’t…”
“Yes, yes. They’ve confirmed that it was a transfer arranged by the shipping company, from the Marine IV administration, under the internal extraordinary assistance program. So breathe easy—your grandmother’s spot is secured.”
“The shipping company? Through the extraordinary assistance program?” My whole body goes limp, and my face turns whiter than a captain’s dress uniform. Who the hell…? I turn my head and meet Helen’s gaze.
“Okay… well, thank you very much.”
I hang up the phone and stare at the blank screen, feeling a wave of rage, wounded pride, and humiliation begin to burn inside me.
I stride toward her.
“Maika…” she begins as soon as I’m close.
“Can you tell me what the hell you’ve done?” I hiss at her, keeping my voice down so as not to make a scene in front of the table.
The entire dining room seems to fall silent around us. Helen swallows hard and locks eyes with me, her cowardly silence confirming exactly what she’s done.
“Behind my back, Helen? Really?” I reproach her. “Have you decided to fix my life on your own and at your own risk, as if my grandmother, my problems, and my damn dignity were just a formality you could handle all by yourself?”
“Maika, listen to me for a second, please,” she pleads, taking a step toward me. “I just wanted to take that weight off your shoulders. I saw you were devastated, you couldn’t even breathe, and I… I couldn’t just stand by and do nothing when I had the means to help you until you get that job.”
I laugh, and I assure you it’s the most bitter and sad laugh I’ve ever let out in my life.
“Sure, I forgot that you always have resources for everything,” I snap at her. “The problem is that you played savior without asking my permission. You trampled on my pride.”
Gonzalo makes a move to stand up.
“Come on, Maika, relax a little, because people…”
“Shut up and stay out of this if you value your life,” I cut him off, without even bothering to look at him.
I don’t know if I feel like screaming in the middle of the dining room, bursting into tears, or grabbing Helen by the lapels of her shirt and demanding she give me back my damn autonomy. But I don’t have time to decide, because Arturo appears in the doorway, escorted by Julianne.
“The evaluation meeting has been moved up,” Arturo announces. “We have other matters to attend to.”
I look Helen straight in the eye and swallow the lump in my throat.
“Great, let’s go upstairs and pretend that absolutely nothing just happened here.”
· · ·
Arturo and Julianne take their seats on the other side of the table. Helen sits right to my left, but I drag my chair a few inches farther away. She picks up on it immediately, clenching her jaw.
It’s Julianne who speaks up.
“We’re sorry for the rush, but headquarters wanted to wrap things up before the ship docks in Ibiza.”
My temples are throbbing with brutal force. I can’t concentrate. All I can think about is the phone call I just received.
And Helen’s fucking betrayal.
Arturo clears his throat, taking control of the meeting.
“We’ve thoroughly analyzed your performance over the past few days. And although the initial plan was to grant a single position onshore, after reviewing your reports, regional management has decided to restructure the department once again.”
Helen looks up suddenly. I do the same, frowning.
Julianne allows herself a smile of professional satisfaction.
“There won’t be a winner and a loser, girls.
Headquarters wants to implement shared leadership for the new Global Experience and Fleet Operations division.
There are two management positions of equal rank: one focused on structure, security, and processes, and the other dedicated to the human experience, events, and team management.
But they converge under the same overarching direction. ”
The world stops for a second. Under any other circumstances in life, this would have been the moment to jump for joy, to start screaming like a madwoman, and to cover Helen with kisses.
But the news hits me poisoned, dirty, and smelling of something burnt.
“I made it very clear that I didn’t want to continue with this,” Helen blurts out suddenly.
And it leaves me frozen in my tracks.
“I’m sorry, but we couldn’t afford to lose an excellent worker like you,” Julianne tells her.
What the hell?
Helen looks at Julianne, and suddenly it all clicks in my head. Not only has she dared to humiliate me with the payment for the nursing home, but she’s also turned down the job.
I stand up from my seat and look at all three of them.
“I’m sorry. But I have no intention of working or sharing an office with a liar and a traitor,” I declare with surprising clarity.
I grab my cell phone from the table and head for the exit, without looking back for even a second.
I know that if I turn to look at her, I’ll shatter into a thousand pieces.
So, I close the door, leaving behind the promotion of a lifetime, and the secure future of the only woman who has been able to make me feel like the most loved and the most betrayed woman on the entire planet at the same time.