Chapter 21 #3
I nod again. “I understand.” I almost call him Alasdair again, but he found that amusing before, so I’m not sure if it’s the appropriate response or not. I’m not sure what I should call him.
He gives a firm nod. “Good. Until you’re comfortable doing that with other people, we're going to work on getting you comfortable with me. Then you can tell me what you want and need, and I’ll advocate for you, all right? We’ll start there and work our way up.”
It’s a concept I’ve never thought possible.
I’ve never had someone even care what I wanted.
Everyone always assumed they knew what I needed, that they knew even better than I did.
The only person that doesn’t do that is Lily, my best friend, but even she didn’t advocate for me.
She can’t, since she’s too busy trying to learn how to advocate for herself.
It’s something we’ve bonded over. Although we try to take care of each other and have each other’s backs, sometimes our social anxiety gets the better of us and we just deal with the hand we’re dealt.
Alasdair is different. He wants to help and he doesn’t have the same problems as Lily and me. He’s not afraid to speak up and cause a scene if need be. Why would he? He’s a mafia god, for crying out loud. He probably shoots anyone that disrespects him.
God, I hope he isn’t thinking about doing that now.
I realize I don’t know how he handles this sort of thing.
Does he go around shooting people willy-nilly?
It seems like my grandfather kind of does, though maybe not to the extent of hurting the sales associate.
But my grandmother said the Irish Demon is even worse than my grandfather.
While I haven’t exactly seen that so far with Alasdair, I also haven’t seen him deal with any conflict like this, either.
“Please don’t shoot her,” I whisper before I can help myself.
A look of shock crosses his face, and then he bursts out laughing.
“Oh, my sweet little leannán, is that what you think of me? Is that why you’re so afraid?
” He lifts his hand to caress my chin with his thumb.
“What a little dove you are. No, I’m not going to shoot the sales clerk at the department store.
Not unless you ask me to.” He winks at me, and I can’t tell if he’s joking or not.
“But I am going to advise the management at this store to train her better and ensure she does her job appropriately. Then get those shoes you want. Maybe I’ll make them serve you on hand and foot, too, catering to your every whim.
Maybe I’ll make them help you try on every piece of clothing at this store. What do you think?”
A flush of head courses through me. “Um. I don’t think that’s necessary. Especially considering that I’m pretty sure nothing will fit me here besides the shoes and accessories.”
He laughs and throws his head back. He looks so handsome when he does that.
I shake the thoughts out of my head. “Ah, yes. That’d be a bit too much too soon, eh?
Maybe someday I’ll get you used to such treatment.
That way you’ll be able to handle being treated as you should, like a princess.
But we’ll work our way up to that. We don’t want to overwhelm you, after all.
But it’ll remain a goal of mine nonetheless. ”
My cheeks flush again at even the thought of me behaving like that, expecting it. I could never imagine myself being so rude and presumptuous. “All right. But for now, maybe I can just get the shoes?”
He nods. “Yes, sweet leannán. We’ll start there.
” He pauses and grins, leaning in closer to me.
“You look like a sweet little angel when you blush. So pretty.” Heat floods me again, making him laugh.
“Yes. Just like that. Perfect.” He tucks more hair behind my ear, and I feel my chest restrict at the sweet gesture.
It makes my head spin, and I’m not sure what to think.
His sweet actions towards me contrast with the dangerous and powerful man I know him as, and it’s confusing.
I know people aren’t black and white, but this feels so extreme.
He places his hand on the small of my back and leads me back towards the shoes. I point out the boots I want, and he nods. “What about any other shoes?”
I look over the other shelves displaying the shoes. “The boots were my favorite, but I was looking at some of the heels, too…for going out to dinner and stuff. It wasn’t very necessary before, but now…”
He nods. “Yes, you’re right. It’s necessary now, since I’m going to be taking you to all sorts of magnificent places.
” He leans in closer, his hot breath ghosting across my ear.
“I want to show off the beauty you try so hard to hide, little leannán. And that’s exactly what I plan to do, so you can be confident in yourself. ”
I look up into his eyes, and am surprised to see a flicker of desire there. At least, I think that’s what it is.
Is it possible that the Irish Demon actually wants me as his wife and in his bed?