Chapter Three
Grayson
I have Milly’s words stuck in my mind. “Maybe you could use the company too.” I have my hands twisted in this woman’s hair, fucking all of my pent-up frustrations down this woman’s throat, but all I can picture is Milly being the one on her knees for me.
I’m in the VIP section of The Void. It is a BDSM centered club owned by The Dove Institute, and I frequent this place.
Coincidentally, I am here after every single session that I have with Milly.
It can’t possibly be because I want to fuck all the trauma out of that woman and watch her flourish into the woman she deserves to be.
It’s definitely not because she is always smiling at me with those beautiful green eyes, begging me for something she doesn’t understand.
Yet. When she told me she signed up for the marriage pact, I could’ve put my fucking fist through a wall.
No one fucking deserves her but me. I’m the only one who has ever been there for that woman.
How can people be so goddamn cruel? Every time I see her piece of shit stepfather, I swear, I could fucking kill him.
This woman is not struggling enough. She’s not even crying.
I pull her up and shove her over the arm of the chair so I can pull a condom over my cock.
I would much rather have Milly around my cock, but this one will do for now.
I pour lube on her ass and slam into her, groaning at the way she screams. Hope knows what happens when she lets me use her, so she grabs hold of the seat cushion and braces herself for when I grab her by the hips and start ramming into her ass as hard as I can.
“Fuck! That hurts. Grayson. Fuck. Please,” she cries.
“Either say the safe word or shut the fuck up and take my cock,” I growl. For just long enough, I can picture it’s Milly. Weak pleasure shoots up my spine, and I groan as I come.
“Jesus, Grayson,” Hope pants as she pulls herself up to stand. “Who pissed you off?”
“I’m sorry,” I sigh and hug her.
“I’m always happy to be your punching bag,” she laughs. “I’m going to get going, though. You okay?”
“Yeah. You go,” I say. “Drive safe.”
“I will,” she says with a smile.
I watch as Hope leaves the VIP area before tossing myself down on the couch to sit. I lay my head back and stare up at the ceiling.
“Hey,” Adam says as he sits beside me. Adam is my best friend and comes here with me most days. I think he likes to look after me, but will never admit it.
“Hi,” I sigh.
“What happened?”
“Why do you always ask that?” I ask, sitting up to look at him.
“Don’t try to bullshit me. What happened?”
“She cut herself again,” I say. “It was deep… She signed up for the marriage pact. Her test was this morning.”
“Oh shit… Does Greg know?”
“No,” I sigh. “I’m doing EMDR therapy on Friday. I’m hoping it will help guide her to getting her thoughts in order. She knows the answers, but she doesn’t want to see them yet.”
“Did she say when she is getting placed?”
“She said next week, but I think it will be Friday. I took mine Tuesday night, and they want me to go Friday. It doesn’t take that long to pair people,” I say. “I’m worried that her seeing me there will send her into a spiral in front of everyone.”
“You could delay yours.”
“I’ve delayed it for months now,” I sigh. “I shouldn’t be this damn obsessed with her. It’s not fair to whoever I get paired with.”
“Everything will work out. You know that,” Adam says. “Just try to get her to see reality for what it is, guide her out of the dark, and then she can heal properly.”
“Yeah,” I sigh.
My phone dings on the table, so I pick it up. I see that Milly has updated the document, so I open it up to see what she wrote.
Molly,
I wish I had the words to explain just how much love you deserve.
You’ve been hurt for so long, and it’s not fair.
I don’t know how to help you out of this, but I want to.
I want you to be free. Be happy. I wish you’d talk to Grayson.
He’s helped me see the value in keeping myself alive.
I stay for you, but he’s the one who has shown me that I should live for myself, too. Maybe he can teach you, too?
He wants me to do this therapy thing where I talk about when Dad died.
I don’t think about that day on purpose because it hurts.
I know I need to find a way to process everything, but I feel selfish for thinking I have it so bad when you are the one suffering underneath Greg at night.
God, his moans are so damn annoying. Does he have to use so much lube?
Maybe he and Mom should pick a different position or something so he will leave you alone.
Surely jerking off is better than fucking someone who doesn’t want you. Evil people don’t follow logic, though.
I lied to Grayson today. I told him the placement was next week, but it’s Friday.
I’m afraid of losing him, and it feels like the moment I’m placed, I will.
I know I’ll survive—He taught me that—but I don’t want to lose him.
I feel like an idiot for thinking the things I do about him.
I wish that we had met in a different way.
Grew close under different circumstances.
What is it called… Transference? I know that my feelings are just a delusion because he’s the only person in the world who has treated me with respect.
He is all the good in the world, but it’s one-sided.
I’m sane enough to know that. Maybe getting married and disappearing is the best for both of us?
Milly