Chapter 11 #2
But it was true, Frankie did see her and she meant it when she had said it.
She saw a woman who had so much taken from her at such a young age, someone who never got to chase after their own dreams, who sacrificed so much for someone she loved, and from the way Jules spoke about it all, it was clear to Frankie that she’d been struggling but had become an expert at keeping it all under wraps for the sake of the people around her.
There was a loneliness to that which few people really understood.
They’d walked back to the condo together after Frankie had paid for their meal, something Jules had very astutely tried to refuse and to Frankie’s surprise, Jules thanked her for the evening with a hug in the elevator before she got off on the 14th floor.
Being taller made it easier for Frankie to hold her close, to slide her arms around Jules and feel her face against her chest. Her body was warm and she’d smelled of lavender and the way it felt, the connection that was undeniable, it was unlike anything Frankie had ever experienced before which sounded…
crazy. They barely knew one another so why did her heart rate increase anytime she thought of Jules?
To her disappointment, the embrace in the elevator was over in a flash before she’d really been able to settle into the sensation of it and then the elevator doors were closing, and Frankie was alone with her racing thoughts in the hallway.
People definitely felt that way when they hugged their friends, right? Like their whole world was completely knocked off its axis?
When Frankie had briefly touched Jules' arm during dinner, it was a natural and fluid thing to do, a friendly touch that Jules seemed to appreciate and maybe even silently crave in a moment when she needed a source of grounding.
It was empathy and understanding, a sign that hopefully told Jules that Frankie knew exactly what it was like to lose something that meant everything to you, and even that slight connection had her brain short circuiting.
The feeling she got when Jules hugged her was like a fuse had blown.
And as she’d walked towards her door with the image of a gorgeous, smiling blonde in her head, she knew then that she was so unbelievably screwed. She had a real and undeniably massive crush on Jules Clarke.
“I used to spend hours shooting pucks with Jules in the backyard,” Cam said, pulling Frankie out of her thoughts and back to reality.
It was like he knew she’d been thinking about his sister, she just hoped he was completely oblivious to how she was thinking about her.
He had a puck on his stick and started practicing his dangles on the ice in front of him.
“We would just hammer them at the net off of this little plastic shooting pad my dad found at a garage sale,” he said with a laugh.
“Jules had one hell of a rocket for a release and we even played on a team together when we were young but then the boys started getting a little too big, a little too rough, and my mom didn’t want her to get hurt. ”
“You guys are really close.”
Cam smiled and spun around to take one last shot on the net. It bounced off one post then hit the other and popped back out. “She’s my best friend,” he said and the tone of his voice, the sincerity in the way he spoke made it very clear that he meant it.
“I don’t have any siblings,” Frankie admitted.
But she wasn’t about to get into her complicated family history with one of the players on her team and they had already spent too much one on one time together on the ice for the day.
“And I think that’s enough practice for the day or Neil will blame me if you hurt yourself out here.”
“I’ve always enjoyed sticking around after practice some days to shoot for fun.
No pressure, no rules, just hockey. Nice and simple.
” Cam smiled and they skated together towards the bench after gathering up all the pucks left on the ice and dropping them into a milk crate for the equipment manager.
“It’s nice to remind myself of why I started playing in the first place, y’know? ”
Frankie did know, she knew too well actually, and it’s why she pivoted to coaching after she graduated from college.
The realization that her actual playing days were over was a hard pill to swallow after she broke her leg but she knew she could never walk away from the sport completely, not when it was the core of who she was and, if she were completely honest, all she really had.
Being close to something she loved was better than not having it in her life at all.
Frankie let herself into her condo later that night and dropped her keys in a bowl on a table beside the door. She hung her work bag on a hook then closed the blinds on the large living room and bedroom windows and headed into her en suite washroom and turned on the shower.
Once the room was hot and steamy, she stripped off her team-provided coaching kit – a quarter zip fleece and joggers – then stepped into the shower and let the sting of the hot water roll over her body.
Between the runs she continued to do out of spite, the workouts she often found herself doing in the early hours of the morning when she couldn't sleep and her time spent on the ice every day, her body was sorer than it had been in months but the ache was nice. The ache meant her pain was earned.
The scar tissue surrounding the healed break in her leg had been especially tender as of late and she bent to massage the muscle and skin around the area of her femur that had changed the trajectory of her life.
She grimaced as she kneaded at the area then took a breath and stood up, closing her eyes to let the hot water cascade over her from the luxurious rainfall shower head.
It was a major step up from the 30 year old apartment building she’d been living in back in Alberta that sometimes didn’t even have hot water.
She couldn’t keep her thoughts from drifting to Jules as the water warmed her and ran down the curves of her body. Her pretty face, soft features and blue eyes, the way her lips curved when she smiled, the swell of her breasts and the way her jeans seemed to hug her waist in the most delicious way.
There was no denying that Jules was Frankie’s type and her attraction to a woman always grew the closer she got to someone. She and Jules were growing a little closer every time they were around each other, and anyone with eyes would agree that Jules really was gorgeous.
Without giving it much thought, Frankie slid a hand between her legs and sighed as two fingers grazed the little bundle of nerves that was already so sensitive.
She circled it gently then dipped her fingers lower before bringing them back up to focus her attention on where her body wanted it the most. Her hips bucked against her hand and she braced herself against the cold shower tile.
She should feel guilty for touching herself like this while thinking about Jules but she was too far gone, the feeling too good, the image in her head too perfect, to really care right now.
Within a few minutes, her muscles tightened and she quietly cried out as her release washed over her like the water from the shower head above her. Her body shuddered as she drew her hand away and planted it on the wall next to the other one.
“Shit…” She panted, laughing a little at herself at the unexpectedness of it all.
If that’s how good it felt when all she did was think about Jules…how good might it feel if she ever got the chance to actually be with her in a moment of intimacy? The likelihood of that ever happening was slim to none.
After her shower, she pulled on some fresh clothes and sat down in her living room with a cup of tea. She looked around the space that she’d yet to fill with much of anything aside from the essentials and an idea popped into her head.
Jules was just as new to this building as she was and maybe that meant they were both living on the side of bare necessities so without a second thought, she messaged the person she’d been spending far too much time thinking about lately.
Frankie – 5:15PM
Hey! Feel like taking a trip to IKEA with me this weekend? I'll drive and maybe I'll let you pick the music :)
Jules – 5:18PM
Isn’t the Halifax IKEA like ten minutes away? That means, what, I get…maybe four songs?
Frankie laughed and she snuggled deeper into her couch cushions, taking a sip of peppermint tea as she considered her reply.
Frankie – 5:20PM
Four songs can feel like a lifetime if you pick the right ones.
And with the right person along for the ride beside you, there’s nowhere else you’d rather be.