Chapter 18
As it turned out, I didn’t have to watch from the sidelines while Tarben and Oriane shared a dance. Before the new song began, a young man approached me and asked me to dance. He was good looking, although not as handsome as Tarben.
Still, it cheered me considerably. I agreed to dance, and, although I promptly forgot his name, I thoroughly enjoyed myself.
Our dance had barely come to an end when another young man asked me for a turn, followed by another and another. It was a blessing that the mortal dances were similar enough to the ones we did back home.
Before I knew it, over an hour had passed and I was in desperate need of a break.
With a light flush tickling my cheeks, I thanked my latest partner and excused myself. I had just secured a fresh goblet of wine when the sound of Tarben’s voice startled me.
“You’re in high demand this evening,” he said. Was it my imagination or was there a tightness to his words? I had subtly kept an eye on him while I was dancing and it hadn’t escaped my attention that he seemed to be focused on me the entire time, despite the string of beauties he’d danced with.
The green-eyed beast had been displeased by seeing Tarben with other females.
In fact, it had roared its disapproval. It was only being territorial because of the task I had to complete.
With all I had at stake, it was perfectly logical that I would not love the sight of females descending on him like sharks scenting blood.
That, and I’d never liked to share my toys.
I turned to face him. “I’ve received a warm welcome this evening,” I said, lifting a shoulder.
Tarben crossed his arms. “So I’ve noticed.” He said it in a would-be joking manner, except it came out sounding flatter than he had most likely intended.
He was jealous. Perfect.
Maybe it was the wine, but I was in a generous mood. “Yes, the locals are very friendly. Although the one I’ve had my eye on is yet to show me his excellent dance skills.”
“You’re not talking about Ulf again, are you?” he asked, tilting his head as if trying to decipher me.
With a playful smile, I shook my head.
Looking considerably happier, he held out a hand. “In that case, would you do me the honor of a dance?”
“I would love to,” I grinned. Disposing of my goblet, I accepted his hand and allowed him to lead me towards the dance floor.
Tarben hadn’t lied—he was an excellent dancer. He guided me across the floor in a series of impeccable movements that seemed to flow seamlessly from one to the next.
I met him step for step, and, looking at his face of unmasked happiness, I couldn’t help but return his wide grin.
I loved to dance. It was almost comparable to how I felt when I was swimming through the waves, wild and unbound.
I felt an ache when I thought of my tail, but only for a heartbeat. Tarben laid his hands on the small of my back, pulling me into the present. Blinking up at him, I realized the song had ended.
He was looking at me like I was a prize he had just won. Now was the perfect time to get him alone.
“Tarben?”
“Are you alright?” he asked, concern flickering in his gaze at whatever he saw on my face.
“Fresh air. I think I need fresh air.” It wasn’t entirely a lie.
“Alright, let’s find you some fresh air.” He nodded.
I accepted his elbow and allowed him to guide me out of the great hall.
He led me through the endless hallways and corridors of the castle, keeping close to my side. When we reached the entrance hall, I was surprised to find that, instead of going through the oak doors that led to the grounds, we continued up one of the great stone staircases.
“Where are we going?” I asked, intrigued.
“You’ll see.”
We continued up the staircase until we arrived at the heavily guarded top floor. We were in the royal wing.
My breathing quickened, not just from reaching the summit of the stairs. Was he taking me to his quarters?
Ignoring the guards, we went right and continued walking.
“Almost there,” he said.
He was behaving so secretively that I couldn’t help but feel a thrill at sneaking around. Tarben most certainly was not supposed to leave the ball, and the fact that we were completely alone together? I was sure it would raise eyebrows amongst the mortals.
At last, we entered a cozy sitting room with double doors that led to an outdoor terrace.
He took my hand and led me through the glass doors.
The night air nipped at me as soon as we stepped outside. It was a shock to my senses but better than being in the stifling heat of the overcrowded hall.
Noticing my involuntary shiver, Tarben shrugged off his jacket and offered it to me.
“Thank you,” I said, savoring the warmth from where his body had been and inhaling the pine needle and leather scent that lingered.
“Where, exactly, are we?” I asked, my breath like puffs of smoke.
“This is my family’s private terrace garden,” he replied, gesturing toward the splashes of greenery beyond the white, wrought iron table and chairs. “It was my mother’s favorite place.”
There was a hint of sadness in his voice. “It’s lovely,” I said, meaning it. I took in the stretches of grass, the planter boxes filled with flowers, the potted herbs—rosemary and lavender—and the trellises festooned with climbing vines and late-blooming jasmine.
We discarded our masks on the wrought iron table then walked towards the marble fountain at the center of the garden.
Water flowed peacefully into a small pond where yellow-green fish with black stripes swam between lily pads.
I’d expected to take a seat on the bench beside the pond, but, instead, we continued walking.
“Where are we going now?” I asked.
“So many questions. Come on, you’ll see.”
Wrapping my arms around myself, I followed him to the parapet at the edge of the garden. He sat on the stone wall and proudly declared, “I present to you, the best view in the entire kingdom.”
Cautiously, I approached where he was perched, then sucked in a breath.
The wall not only offered a spectacular view of the ocean but it also unveiled the entirety of Barvik in the distance.
The landscape twinkled with lights, stretching endlessly into the surrounding bluffs.
Even though it was late, the city seemed to pulsate with vitality.
In some ways, it reminded me of the view of Ardalia from Vellamere Palace at night. The way it made me feel—humbled. Like a small part of something bigger. A simple polyp amongst a sprawling coral reef.
He looked at me expectantly. “What do you think?”
“It’s breathtaking.”
Underneath us, the waxing moon was reflected in the depthless black ocean.
Tonight, its call was like a lover’s purr.
More than ever before, I wanted to surrender to my urges.
To rip off my gown and sprint towards its embrace.
Feel its touch upon my flesh. Allow my body to become entwined with the waves.
“Is this better?” Tarben asked, pulling me out of my fantasies.
“Much,” I said, tearing my eyes from the ocean and meeting his gaze. I was undeniably tempted by the call of the ocean. If I hadn’t been with him, I might have given in to its sweet murmuring.
He gestured to a spot next to him on the wall.
“You lost your flower,” he remarked, once I sat down.
“Did I?” I plucked the aster from a concealed pocket that Runa had stitched into the side seam of my gown to hold my small tin of lip stain.
His eyebrows raised. “What other secrets and tricks do you have up your sleeve?”
If only you knew. “None worth sharing.” I kept my tone vague. “What about you? Do you bring all your esteemed subjects to your private garden and charm them into confessing their secrets?”
“I’m flattered that you think I’m charming.” He clutched his heart, and I rolled my eyes. He went on, “Outside of family, I’ve never brought anyone here before, except Magnus.”
“I’m astounded you’ve never pushed him off the wall.”
“Oh, I’ve definitely thought about it—many times.”
We both chuckled. Then he said abruptly, “You still owe me a truth about yourself.”
I shook my head. “I do not! I’ve already told you mine.”
“And I told you that it didn’t count.” When I began to protest again, he continued, “You’re so mysterious all the time. I just want to know one thing—one meaningful thing about you. Collecting flowers for your journal doesn’t count.”
I would admire his persistence if it wasn’t such a pain in the ass. What could I possibly tell him? The silence stretched on while I wracked my brain.
An owl hooted from somewhere below as if urging me to hurry up and say something.
Finally, I said, “There’s only one person in the world who truly cares about me. Mae.”
If he was taken aback by my confession, he didn’t show it. “Who is she to you?” he asked kindly.
Fidgeting with my charm bracelet, I said, “Not a friend, nor a mother. Something in between, I suppose.”
“And what makes you think she’s the only one who cares about you?”
When I said I wanted fresh air, this was not what I’d had in mind.
A distant, rational voice screamed at me to stop talking, to change the subject, to make a joke.
For some reason, I ignored it. “Because she is the only one who has always been there for me, unconditionally. She’s the only one who cares that sweet treats are my weakness—except lemon.
And she’s the only one who accepts me exactly as I am. ”
He shifted closer. “She sounds special.”
“She is,” I said, feeling a pang of sadness. This was the longest I’d ever been away from her. Was she missing me? Worried?
“For what it’s worth, I care very much that you have a sweet tooth. I had my suspicions, but, now that they’ve been confirmed, I will be sure to bring chocolate if there’s even the slightest chance I’ll see you.”