Chapter 19
When I woke the next morning, I was filled with a new resolve. As much as I wanted to be honest with Jack, I trusted that if I just gave it time, Ellie would be gone, and our lives could return to normal. So I decided to bury my secret even deeper, hoping it would never see the light of day.
After making sure Mother was comfortable, I set out for Dandridge, where I did a little shopping.
I bought a new dress and some ribbons for my hair, along with a special outfit for my trip with Jack.
I even picked up some steaks for dinner, hoping that we could celebrate Ellie’s departure and a return to normalcy.
By the time I got to Jack’s place, it was nearly dusk, the sky a breathtaking mix of purples and golds.
I paused in the driveway, taking in the sight of our house, nestled among the trees.
The sight gave me a flicker of hope that maybe life could indeed return to normal, that perhaps I had survived the storm a second time.
I parked my car alongside the white picket fence and retrieved my bags from the back seat. As I eased up the walkway, I could see Jack through the window, a drink in his hand. I felt a knot tighten in my stomach.
The front door creaked open before I even reached the porch step. Jack stood there, his face ashen and his eyes vacant.
“There you are,” I said, surprised to find him home at this hour. I set the groceries on the kitchen counter and kissed him. “I wasn’t expecting you until later.”
“Yeah, well, Matthew agreed to close up, so I decided to come home early.”
I smiled, but he didn’t smile back. “I’m glad you did because I stopped to see Gary and had him cut us a couple of steaks.”
“What’s the occasion?”
“There isn’t one. I’m just happy things are finally returning to normal.”
“And by that you mean—?”
I cut my eyes to him. “Back to the way things were before the funeral.” I unpacked the bags and asked if he wanted to eat now or later.
He downed the rest of his drink, then got up and eased toward the living room. ”I’m not really that hungry.”
“What’s the matter with you?”
“You’ve always been honest with me, right? I mean, you wouldn’t lie to me, would you?”
I froze, my hands clenched in fists at my sides. “Heavens, no. What’s got you all worked up?”
“There’s something I need to ask you, something important, and I want you to be honest.”
The world seemed to be closing in around me. I found an open chair and sat, my legs too weak to stand. “All right.”
“Why didn’t you tell me you called Marie Spencer to let her know I was planning to propose to Ellie?”
His words hit me all at once, like a gust of wind knocking the breath out of me. “W-What are you talking about?”
“All this time I thought her showing up unexpectedly was just a terrible coincidence, or bad luck, but I was wrong. It was you.”
The room spun. My heart pounded in my chest like a wild trapped animal. “Who told you that? Was it Ellie?”
“What if it was? Do you deny it?”
“She’s lying, Jack. Can’t you see that? She’s trying to do whatever she can to steal you from me again.”
“Steal me. Really, Sara? Are you seriously going to sit there and tell me you didn’t call Marie the night you saw the engagement ring?
I saw the look on your face that night at the dock.
You were angry, weren’t you? And you thought if you could get Marie here before I had a chance to ask Ellie, you’d still have a shot, didn’t you? ”
I wilted under his gaze. I considered denying it again and spinning some tale of misunderstanding and confusion, but the look in his eyes was too knowing, too hurt. The truth was out.
“Why would you do that to me? I thought you loved me?”
“I do love you. Don’t you see? That’s why I did it. Ellie never loved you, not the way I do. All she ever did was break your heart.”
“You’re right. She did break my heart, but what you did was worse. You had no right.”
“No right?” Fighting mad, I jumped to my feet.
“I’ve been in love with you from the beginning, long before Ellie Spencer blew into town with her fancy clothes and uppity attitude.
And who was there after she broke your heart, huh?
Who has always been there, picking up the pieces, patiently waiting?
Me, that’s who. So don’t tell me I didn’t have a right.
” I stopped and took a breath, feeling as if I might cry.
“But none of that matters now. Ellie’s gone, hopefully for good this time, and you need to accept that.
” I turned on my heel and started toward the kitchen.
“Actually, she isn’t.”
I took a step, stopped, and turned back. Had I heard him right? “What did you say?”
Jack shook his head. “Ellie isn’t gone. In fact, she’s staying.”
Confusion reigned. “I-I don’t understand. She was supposed to leave this morning.”
“You’re right, she was. But I asked her to stay, and she agreed.”
“Absolutely not! I won’t allow it.”
“I’m afraid you have no say in the matter.
And before you say another word…” He held up a hand.
“Let me tell you how things are going to be from now on.” He took a step toward me, his jaw clenched so tight, the muscles rippled through his skin.
“You have one hour to pack your things and leave this house. After that, I don’t care where you go or what you do, but you’re not welcome here anymore. Is that clear?”
“Jack, you can’t be serious. Please give me another chance. Are you willing to throw away what we have because of something that happened when we were teenagers?”
“Yes, I am,” he said firmly. “And despite what you think, I loved you, Sara. We could have had a future together. But I won’t be in a relationship built on lies.” He grabbed his keys and headed for the door.
“Where are you going?”
“Out. One hour,” he said, holding up a finger, “and you’d better be gone when I get back.” Jack slammed the door behind him, leaving me weeping on the living room floor.
Present
When I finished telling Diane about that painful day, my eyes were blurred with tears. The memories, still so vivid, stung like salt on an open wound.
“I…I don’t know what to say,” Diane said, her voice full of sympathy. “I had no idea it ended like that.”
“Yeah, well…” I wiped the tears from my cheeks with the back of my hand.
“That night was the hardest night of my life. After my fight with Jack, I drove to my aunt’s house and wept until the early morning hours.
What was left of my heart was shattered, the remnants strewn about like shards of glass.
Mother, who seemed to always have the answers, was at a loss for words.
Instead, she stroked my hair, her comforting presence the only consolation to me. ”
“What happened next?”
“The next few days were a blur. I was a ghost, just going through the motions of life. I stumbled through breakfast, fumbling a pot of coffee that shattered on the kitchen floor. Tears sprung anew at the sight of the broken glass, an echo of my devastation. I didn’t know how to pick up the pieces, no more than I knew how to mend my broken heart.
Later, I sat on the porch, staring out at the woods.
The trees swayed with a rhythm that mocked me.
Each gust of wind like a taunt, a reminder of the world moving on while I was trapped in my own private torment.
A piece of me wished Jack would change his mind, that he would find it in his heart to forgive me and give me a chance to make things right.
But I knew it was a fool's hope. Jack had made his stance crystal clear. My past transgressions were unforgivable in his eyes, and there was nothing I could say or do that would change that. It would be years later before I realized that the seeds of my destiny were sown that warm May evening.”
“Was that the moment everything changed for you?”
“Yes. I didn’t know it at the time, but looking back, I see it clearly now. That was the pivot, the hinge on which my life swung in a new direction.”
Diane asked if I needed a break, but I shook my head, knowing that if I didn’t do this now, while my emotions were raw, I would never get through it. “No,” I told her, summoning every ounce of strength I had. “I need to finish this. I need to get this all out.”