14. Savanna
SAVANNA
Logan rolls onto the bed, and there’s a hiss as Panda jumps to the floor.
“I didn’t know he was in here.”
I giggle as I sit up and pull the sheets over my chest. “I’m sorry you had to witness that, Panda.”
“Damn cat’s a voyeur,” Logan mutters.
He heads to the bathroom, and I admire his naked butt and back, glistening with sweat. This is not a bad way to spend a Sunday afternoon.
He comes back with a warm washcloth and runs it over my thighs. I love this part almost as much as the sex, when he takes care of me like I’m something precious. It’s somehow more intimate than the sex, and as I look down at him, carefully tending to me, my chest loosens.
He catches me looking at him and smiles as he shuffles up the bed.
“Do you want me to stay?”
Every other night, I’ve said no. I’ve drawn the line for myself and sent him away, needing to prove to myself that this is still just sex.
But every night it gets harder, and I dread him asking, making it my decision.
If he just got under the sheets and pulled me close, I wouldn’t kick him out.
But he gives me the choice, and so far I’ve had the willpower to say no.
And every night I regret it as I watch him dress and the door closes behind him and I listen to his car drive away. Panda rejoins me on the bed, and I bury my face in his fur, wondering what would happen if I said yes.
Tonight, I must be feeling vulnerable or reckless, because I take a deep breath and nod. “Yes.”
The grin spreads across his face, and he lets out a long sigh. “Thank you.”
Logan pulls back the bedcovers and joins me under the sheets, and his warm body bumps into mine. We roll onto our sides, and he’s facing me. But it’s too intimate, too much. My stupid heart will fall for him all over again if we lie like this.
“I prefer my other side.”
I roll over with my back to him, and he slides his arm over my hip. His body presses against mine, but it’s not sexual. It’s comforting and safe, and I relax against him.
Panda jumps on the bed and lets out a dissatisfied mewl before nestling at the bottom between my feet.
His purrs let me know he’s not that unhappy with the new arrangement. And neither am I. The weight of Logan’s arm is comforting around me, and I’m soon fast asleep.
I’m woken in the night by a throb between my legs and gentle kisses trailing down my back.
I smile in the dark as Logan pushes his hardness into me.
Well, this is a perk of him staying over.
His hand snakes over my belly and up my chest until he’s cupping a breast. His thumb strums my nipple, and I’m suddenly wide awake.
My hand reaches back for him, and I grasp him in my palm.
Logan moans as I move my hand up and down his shaft.
He adjusts his hips and pulls open my thighs, and then he’s between my legs and entering me.
I move my torso forward in the bed so he goes deeper, and we both moan.
His hand slides over my body and between my legs until he finds my sensitive bud.
Every sensation is heightened by the darkness. Logan’s breath tickles my ear, and his warm mouth plants kisses down my neck.
He nips at my shoulder, and the scrape of teeth against skin has me sucking in a breath. He knows my body and what I like and need, and his hands caress me until I’m a writhing bundle of nerves. He increases the pressure between my legs, and then I’m climaxing and calling his name into the dark.
He comes a moment after and pulls me close against him as he does.
I turn around to face him and can just make out his features in the darkness. It’s safer when I can barely see him, and I’m not going to get lost in his gaze.
“Savanna.” He kisses me gently. “I want to stay every night.”
“If you’re going to do that, then you’re welcome.”
His palm cups my cheek. “I want to sleep next to you every night. My injury could end my career, and even if it doesn’t, I want a life with you.”
I stiffen at his words. It’s everything I wanted to hear for so many years, for him to realize his mistake and come crawling back.
But the reality of his declaration is terrifying.
If I give Logan my heart, it leaves me vulnerable, but part of me knows it’s already too late.
I must be stupid, because my heart flutters, and I have to push down the hope and remember what he did.
But that was a long time ago, and I have to admit he was right.
I would have given up my place at college and followed him to a military base.
I would have waited for him to return from every mission and grown more anxious and bored, and I probably would have ended up resenting him for the dreams I gave up.
He was right to leave all those years ago, even if he did decide for me. And I forgive him. But this is all moving too fast.
“Do you mean that?”
He strokes my cheek. “Of course I do. I love you. And I want to be with you, if you’ll have me.”
My chest expands at his words. He loves me, but I’m not ready to say it back. I forgive him, but I’m not ready to make it easy for him.
“I’ll think about it.”
He chuckles. “At least you’re not kicking me out.”
I roll over and he snuggles against me, and as I drift off to sleep with his arms around me, there’s a smile on my face because Logan Winslow loves me.