Chapter 3
ARDEN
Why did it have to be this place?
The words are on repeat in my brain as I pull open the door to Boots on Bar and Grill. The dimly lit space feels like coming home, and normally, that would make my heart all warm and fuzzy in my chest.
But not today.
No, today, I can’t seem to shake the way my stomach has been unsettled since I woke up. It’s probably because I’ve been avoiding Jude since I spilled my life story all over the bar top before coming all over it.
Memories.
I’d ended up getting a head cold, one that took longer to kick than I expected and then I was on an all-out scramble to make my deadlines. The Blackstone Gazette may be a local paper, but it brings joy to so many and I love being a part of that.
The only silver lining is that I happened to have Jude’s story for the bar all ready to print before my sister announced she was having a baby a couple of weeks ago.
Having the story ready gave me a little breathing room, which was good because on top of being sick, I’d been a little manic over my parents dating.
And Jude.
And getting to be an aunt to my half sister’s baby.
And life.
Stepping inside, I scan the room, my stomach rolling at the smell of burgers and fried food as I make a beeline toward the table in the back where Cal, Bea, and Lana are all waiting.
Sometimes I can’t believe that I stumbled into my little group of friends or that they’d been so accepting of me. They’d been Ellison’s friends first, but she never made me feel like I didn’t belong and neither did they.
“You look like hell,” Cal says, looking up from his menu as I slide into the spot next to Bea. His dark hair is swept off his forehead and while the words are honest, his gaze is sympathetic.
“Thanks. Where’s everyone else?” I ask, ignoring him and noting that Ella, Nessa, and Ellison aren’t here.
“Your sister is puking today, Nessa had to take Remi to the doctor, and Ella is working a double at the Poppy Seed,” he says while scanning the menu.
“Are you all right?” Bea asks, my normally bubbly friend touching my hand with concern. The woman is always smiling, her usually infectious good mood doing nothing to counteract the feeling of uneasiness flowing through me.
Seriously, what did I eat yesterday?
“I have no idea. I’ve just been feeling off since last night,” I tell them, as I try to take a steadying breath.
“Are you pregnant?” Lana asks, her dark hair pulled up into a bun at the top of her head. She’s the only one at the table with kids, and while I appreciate her trying to lighten the mood, I’m definitely not pregnant.
“No.” I laugh and shake my head.
“You have to have sex to get pregnant,” Cal supplies helpfully and Lana rolls her eyes.
“Obviously,” she retorts. “Arden, have you been having sex?”
“No, I have not been having sex,” I hiss, my face heating as Jude chooses that exact moment to come and take our drink order. Without looking up from my menu I ask for a water, my eyes blurring the words as I try desperately not to look at him.
There’s no way he didn’t hear me, and I just made my unintentional radio silence that much more awkward. And I don’t want to talk to Jude right now about what happened.
Because that night was amazing and we should definitely talk.
“Are you pregnant?”
It was just the one night.
With Jude.
There’s no way.
No freaking way.
My stomach rolls again as Jude sets our glasses down in front of us, tension radiating off him, his eyes boring into me yet still I can’t look.
I can’t.
Because if we make eye contact I’m liable to blurt out I think I’m pregnant and we absolutely do not need that. At all.
Especially because the thought never even crossed my mind until Lana mentioned it, and now I can’t remember if I had my period or not. When did I change birth controls? Did I skip a cycle by accident?
Bile rises in the back of my throat, and I know if I don’t leave now, I’m going to make a scene. And I don’t need to puke in front of the brutally gorgeous man who owned me when I needed so badly to feel.
And forget.
Looks like I did both.
“Nothing for me, thanks,” I tell Jude with a tight smile after everyone tells him their order. “Guys, I think I’m going to head home. Maybe it’s like a twenty-four-hour bug or something. I think I just need some sleep.”
Waving off their concerns, I promise to text everyone later and slip out of the booth, once again ignoring the way I can feel Jude’s eyes on me as I leave the bar.
But I can’t think about it because there’s a chance I just might change our lives forever.
And with that in mind, I race to the edge of the parking lot and throw up into the bushes.
Shit.