8. Cin #2
I stop when we’re a breath apart, close enough to feel the heat rising off her skin. The air between us buzzes with tension—and something darker, more dangerous. It takes everything in me not to close the remaining distance and claim her the way I’ve been wanting to. The way I’ve been dying to.
If the world really is going to end, why do I keep denying myself? Why can’t I lean in and do what we've both been thinking about for cycles?
Her pulse is visible at her throat, fast and shallow, and I can hear it from here—beating a frantic rhythm that matches my own. My whole body is tuned to her, waiting for a word, a sign, anything to permit me.
I refuse to touch her until it comes. I look deep into her eyes instead, clenching my hands at my sides hard enough that my claws bite into my palms and draw blood.
“Gods, you truly are astounding,” I say, gazing deep into her fascinating eyes.
“How so?”
“There are a million reasons. Currently? Because the way you are looking at me makes me feel warm, when all I have known is cold loneliness.”
I reach up. My hand hovers near her cheek for a moment, close enough that her gentle warmth sears my skin. I hate how long it takes me to close the last inch. I haven't let myself touch her in so long, and I’m worried what will happen when I finally do.
She nods, and my thumb finds her cheek. The second my skin meets hers, something in my chest gives way. It doesn’t break—rather, the wall of ice around my heart thaws, allowing the sheets of armor to fall away.
Willow doesn't pull away. Instead, she leans into it, closing her eyes and releasing a gentle breath, like she feels the same relief I do. I trace the curve of her cheekbone once, twice, memorizing it in case this is all I will have of her.
“What else do you find amazing?” she asks, her voice low.
“Your heart,” I answer without thinking. “You have so much love to give, and all of it freely. Because you love, you are willing to fight that much harder.”
She opens her eyes then, and I gaze deep into them, my head filled with the sound of my wildly beating heart. “What else?”
“Your resilience.” I brush my thumb over a small freckle at the corner of her eye. “You take everything in stride, no matter how challenging. Even with the voice… most would crumple under the weight of that responsibility, and you’re taking it astoundingly well.”
“Who said I was taking it well?”
I raise a brow, the corner of my lip twitching. “There’s another thing. You make me smile. I think that’s pretty amazing.”
She grins shyly, lowering her eyes. “Fine. I’ll give that one to you.”
I lean closer, closing what’s left of the space between us. Catching her chin between my thumb and forefinger, I tilt her face up. Her lashes stay low a moment longer before she looks up, but when she finally meets my gaze, it steals my breath away.
The ring of red around her irises is brighter now, pulsing in time with the quick rhythm of her heartbeat. Her lips are parted, her breath quickened, and a beautiful flush spreads across her face.
I hold her chin steady, forefinger resting just beneath her jaw, stopping her from looking away. Neither of us moves for a long moment. With each passing heartbeat, I feel the thread of my resolve fray a little more.
“Cin…”
My name rolling off her tongue is my undoing. My hand snaps to the back of her neck, holding her in place as I lower my head. My lips graze the shell of her ear, and Willow’s pulse spikes as a shiver runs through her.
For one perfect second, there's nothing else. Just the taste of her skin on my tongue, her pulse against my palm, and the small sound she makes when my lips find the sensitive spot below her lobe.
Then the cold slips in. It starts low in my spine, spreading outward through my veins, filling my body with a horrible, familiar wrongness.
I feel myself start to slip as The Other wakes. I blink, and it’s like I’m watching from somewhere outside my own body, unable to control what happens next.
“You’re dangerous for me, serafyn,” I whisper. “I can’t seem to control myself when you’re near. I just want to…”
The words die in my throat as the last thread of my sanity snaps.
Unable to control myself, I feel my hand reaching up toward my mouth.
In the next moment, there’s a sensation like someone is shoving a hot poker through my jawbone.
I try to scream, but The Other has taken my voice from me, and nothing comes out but a puff of air.
I’m vaguely aware of something warm and wet dripping down my face, but my mind is too jumbled from pain to fully understand what it is.
Then Willow screams, and I realize exactly what’s happened.
The Other throws my mask to the side, and it clatters loudly against the far wall, splattering blood all across the ice.
“Cin,” Willow gasps. “Your… your face…”
I want to reach up and hide from her, but I can’t even do that. Shame pulses hot through my veins as I watch her eyes widen with horror—and I can’t even blame her. It’s why I hide behind the mask.
Only now, The Other won’t let me.
I lean in close to her neck again, breathing deep, getting high off her scent. Willow squeals as some of my blood smears onto her skin, but The Other makes me hold her in place.
“You smell so good,” I say. “I just want…”
“What?” She sounds scared now. “What do you want, Cin?”
Instead of answering, I lean in, nuzzling her neck. I want to stop. I'm screaming at myself to stop, but the command doesn't reach anything that will listen.
My teeth sink into her skin.
Willow lets out a choked scream, and it is the worst thing I've ever heard. But the being controlling my body just laughs.
I pull back with my mouth dripping black blood, a manic curl to my lips. “Just a little taste…”
Willow's hand flies to her neck, and thick black blood wells between her fingers, streaming down her arm. Her terrified eyes meet mine for one horrible moment, and I watch the trust in them die as she finally sees the monster living in mine.
Without a word, she turns and runs, stumbling twice before gaining her footing and disappearing into the hallway.
I want to call after her. I want to tell her to keep running, to not look back, to get as far from me as her legs will take her. Instead, laughter tears out of my throat—high-pitched and evil—nothing like any sound I've ever made in my life
My legs move on their own, The Other’s hunger driving me forward, forcing me to chase her.
“You’re mine, serafyn! You can’t run forever!”
Willow glances over her shoulder, notices how close I’m getting, and lets out a horrible scream. “Rhune! Nyx! Dravik! Help me!”
Her voice bounces off the ice walls, and somewhere ahead of us I hear footsteps answering. Rhune and Nyx round the corner at a dead sprint, and I watch their expressions shift the second they see me behind her.
Rhune's already reaching for Willow before his feet fully stop moving, sweeping her behind him in one fluid motion. Nyx breaks off in the other direction, angling to cut me off before I can lunge and sink my claws into her.
Nyx's arms lock around my chest, holding me back while Rhune moves to disable my arms. Willow watches from a few feet away, her face frozen in horror as I struggle against my brothers.
I manage to slip through their hold briefly, lunging toward Willow and snapping the air in front of her face before they haul me back.
I laugh maniacally as they pull me away, the sound tearing out of my throat and bouncing off the walls. The Other's voice pushes out through my mouth, shuddering with madness. “You’re mine, serafyn. Mine, mine, mine, mine—”
Something hard hits the back of my head, and everything goes black.