chapter 17 #2
“Are you okay?” I ask. Alisha is usually bubbly and full of life, but she seems off tonight, not laughing and joking the way she usually does when we all get together like this.
She nods once, but her smile doesn’t reach her eyes. “Yeah. Just tired. I had a lot of clients today.”
“Oh,” I say, though I’m not convinced. Alisha is one of the more popular personal trainers in LA, but no matter how many clients she has, she’s usually full of energy, able to run circles around all of us. Still, I don’t push it; she obviously doesn’t want to talk about it right now.
She squeezes my shoulder again, then goes to sit next to Jordan. I don’t miss the fact that she leaves the space beside Lucas empty.
The darkness deepens around us, and the night grows quiet, with only the crackling flames, summer breeze through the palms, and Michael’s steady strumming on the guitar.
River cuddles up next to me, and she lets me scratch her behind the ear, then wiggles her nose into the space between my shoulder and neck, making me laugh.
“Anyone want another drink?” Lucas asks as he stands from the couch, empty beer bottle in hand.
Casting a look at him, Alisha crosses her arms. “Don’t you think you’ve had enough?”
Her question cuts through the easy vibe, and I’m pretty sure we’re all trying not to react. Nora’s eyes widen a bit, and one of Dex’s eyebrows inches up slowly. Even River and Nala lift their heads, like they could feel the tension in her voice.
Lucas’s eyes narrow as he looks down at her. There’s a moment of silence, Michael’s strumming having abruptly cut off.
“You tell me,” Lucas finally says, voice that low monotone that I know means he’s pushing his feelings down, locking them away so no one can see them. “You’ve obviously been keeping tabs.”
Now Alisha is glaring at him, her arms still crossed tight over her chest, as if she’s armoring herself against him.
Lucas lets out a small sound, something between a laugh and a scoff, then turns to walk away, his form a dark silhouette against the dim light bleeding out of my house.
For a second, we all sit there, no one speaking or moving.
Then Jordan says, “Come on, I wanna put my feet in the pool.”
Jordan pulls Alisha up, then links elbows with her, and they walk across my deck to the big heated in-ground swimming pool.
With the spot next to Nora now free, Dex scoots over to sit beside her, his arm wrapping around her shoulders as he pulls her close.
River decides to abandon me to jump up onto the couch next to Dex, and he starts to trail a hand lazily down her head.
I look at Michael. When he meets my eyes, I gesture to the house with my head and say, “You think he’s okay?”
He gives a small shake of his head and resumes plucking at the guitar.
Yeah, I don’t think so either.
So I press up off the couch and pad across the deck, going to look for him. When I step through the open sliding glass door, I don’t see him in the kitchen or in the living room. But drifting through the dark is the gentle sound of piano keys.
I head to my music room.
The door is pushed halfway closed, and I ease through it, then close it behind me.
Lucas is sitting at my grand piano, an ancient behemoth that’s pretty much my pride and joy.
It was my grandmother’s. Dad wanted to get rid of it when she died; I ended up buying it from him since he refused to give it to me. Now it’ll always be safe with me.
Lucas doesn’t turn to look at me, just keeps pressing the keys, his shoulders hunched in the dark, his hair a pale splash of yellow in the thin moonlight coming through the window.
With a sigh, I move across the room, feet bare on the big rug underfoot, and sink into the plush armchair in the corner. Lucas still doesn’t say anything, so I sit there thinking about Remi until Lucas’s fingers finally slip from the keys.
In the quiet, I say, “You hiding in my cave now?”
He reaches for the beer bottle on the piano bench next to him and takes a long drink. After swallowing, he cuts a look over his shoulder at me. “I don’t hide.”
“Then what are you doing?” I sit forward in the chair, bracing my elbows on my knees. “And what the hell is going on with you and Alisha? You two never get at each other like that.”
Lucas’s jaw flexes in the moonlight, making the snake that’s inked into his throat look like it’s slithering across his skin. He’s quiet for so long that I’m certain he’s not going to respond—which wouldn’t surprise me.
I’ve known this guy for a long time, since we were in school, and we’ve been through hell together, including surviving our awful fathers.
And for a while, he’s been getting better, opening up more.
Alisha has been a big part of that. So seeing him sitting in the dark, drinking alone, makes dread curl inside me.
I don’t want to see him slip back into that place. It’s way too fucking painful.
“We’re fine,” he says at long last. Then he lifts the beer bottle and finishes it off in a few swigs. Pushing to his feet, he says, “I’m out. See you at the studio.”
He holds his fist out to me, and I bump it. But as he heads for the door, I stand and say, “Let me give you a ride.”
He glances at me over his shoulder. And I’m certain he’s about to tell me to fuck off.
But then his shoulders rise and fall in a sigh, and he says softly, “Fine.”
I try not to let him see how relieved I am. “Meet you at the Raptor. I’ll grab the keys.”
While Lucas heads for the garage, I walk into the kitchen, where I grab my keys off the counter.
Then I lean through the open sliding glass door and tell everyone, “I’m taking Lucas home.
” My gaze falls on Alisha, where she’s still sitting next to Jordan, their bare feet making ripples in the pool. “You okay getting home?”
“We’ll take you,” Jordan says, jumping in before Alisha can get a word out.
Alisha gives me a small smile, and it makes my heart hurt. She looks tired. “Thanks, Seb.”
“I’ll be back in an hour,” I say, trying to keep a light tone in my voice. “Text me if you need anything.”
I head through the house, slip my feet into an old beat-up pair of Vans, then head out to the garage, where Lucas is waiting for me.
I hop into the driver’s seat, hit the garage door opener, and crank up the engine.
After backing the Raptor out, I turn onto the road, and Lucas says quietly, “You really like that girl, huh? The stripper.”
My eyes cut to him, but he’s looking out the window at the bands of light and shadow as we cruise under streetlights.
And I find my chest squeezing, words lifting to my throat without me having to go searching for them. I nod. “Yeah, man. I think I really do.”
He lets out another one of those half laughs, half scoffs. It’s got an edge to it. “Try not to fuck it up.”
I swallow hard but don’t respond.
We drive the rest of the way to his place in silence.