Chapter 13
CHAPTER THIRTEEN
KAIRI MOORE
TWO WEEKS LATER
Iused to pride myself on knowing that no matter what I faced, I was a brave person.
Strong. Just like my mother was. I didn’t run or hide from anything or anyone, no matter how uncomfortable it made me feel.
I always stood my ground! That was until I did the unthinkable with Havoc, and I’d been hiding ever since.
I ran and didn’t look back. And I didn’t just run—the next morning I quit my job as his housekeeper. There was just no way I could face him again after that.
Thankfully, we hadn’t exchanged numbers. I’d only communicated with his mother, and that made it easier for me to quit. I explained that I’d picked up more hours at the club and just couldn’t commit anymore. She responded that she understood, and that was the end of that.
I hadn’t seen or heard from Havoc since that night, and hopefully, now everything would go back to normal. Well, as normal as it could be considering what I’d done.
Even though I had originally allowed my need for revenge to lead me to the decision to sleep with Havoc, I went to his condo just to talk.
From the days we spent talking at his condo while I worked, he’d become someone I found easy to confide in.
I truly wanted his opinion on revenge, to know if I was doing the right thing or not.
He let me see that ignoring Ocean was the best thing to do, but somehow, we still ended up going that far.
Immediately, I was hit with the worst-case scenario.
What if my father found out? He would undoubtedly not let it go, and that would eventually lead to Orlando finding out.
And that meant it would only be a matter of time until Ocean found out.
On top of that, I knew my father would lose his job, so would I.
I had been avoiding confronting Ocean for that reason alone, not realizing that getting involved with Havoc still had the same result. It wasn’t something I could take back now—the deed had been done. Now, all I could do was hide and try to act like it didn’t happen.
I smiled at Sparkle as I whizzed by with a tray of drinks.
I dropped them off for a group of men who were celebrating someone’s thirtieth birthday and headed back to the bar to help serve the mass of people crowding around.
Within twenty minutes, Felicity and I had cleared the line of people and I took that moment to bask in the quiet.
It had been nonstop since I clocked in a few hours ago, but with the way I’d been feeling lately, being busy was the best. It didn’t leave me room to think.
Most importantly, no room to think about him!
I quickly made Sparkle another cocktail and passed it over to her. I noticed someone out of the corner of my eye take a seat at the bar. So, with a smile on my face, I turned to serve them only for it to be Havoc.
His hazel eyes were locked on my face, and I felt my breath get stuck in my throat.
He didn’t say anything, but his silence spoke louder than any words he could possibly say. My eyes bounced over to Sparkle, and she looked just as stuck at seeing him. She knew all about our night of passion two weeks ago.
Did I run? Did I just stand there like a fool? I just didn’t know what to do with myself at that point.
Felicity stepped forward and asked him, “What can I get you, Havoc?”
“Nothing. I’m good,” he responded, still looking directly at me. I switched my eyes over to Sparkle, and she was pretending to be busy with something in her purse, knowing damn well she didn’t have anything interesting inside.
Not knowing what else to do, I turned away from him and tried to find something to do that would keep me from looking at him.
With every move I made, I could feel him following my footsteps, but I didn’t dare look back at him.
More people came for drinks, and I quickly served them.
Every so often, my reserve broke, and I would look at him.
His face was still and motionless while his eyes tried to look past me to my deepest depths.
My body shuddered as an image of him plunging into me while looking into my eyes flashed in my memory.
I had completely let myself loose with him that night. I held nothing back.
He suddenly stood to his feet. I froze watching him, wondering what his next move was going to be, and to my surprise, he just walked away.
He didn’t look back. I stood there wondering what that meant.
Wondered why I wanted to go after him even though I knew it was best for me to stay where I was.
I looked over at Sparkle, and she gave me a soft, reassuring smile.
Exhaling heavily, I pushed Havoc to the back of my mind and focused on my job, telling myself it was for the best.
Somehow, I managed to finish the rest of my shift without thinking about Havoc and he didn’t come back inside at all.
As Sparkle and I left the club and strolled to her car, both of us were silent. The gravity of what had happened weighed down on me more than I was willing to admit to myself.
“Kairi,” Havoc’s voice echoed in the night, and I jumped before I saw him leaning against his car. It had been almost three hours since he walked out. Had he been outside waiting for me this whole time?
“What are you still doing here?” I asked even though the look in his eyes told me full well. He was here for me—for answers that I just didn’t want to give him.
“I came to give you a ride, so we can talk,” he said what I already knew.
“But I came with Sparkle—” I said.
“You two need to talk. I’ll call you tomorrow, Kairi,” Sparkle said, cutting me off. She waved at me and walked away, leaving me standing there not knowing what to do.
I turned to look at him.
“Do you want to come with me?” he asked. I froze. The best thing to do was to leave with Sparkle and forget that anything ever happened between us, but my heart was telling me to stay.
I looked behind me again to see Sparkle almost at her car, so there was still a chance for me to go with her, but instead, I turned back to face him. I nodded.
Havoc stared at me, pushed up off his car, and opened the door for me to get in. I climbed inside, and he closed the door before getting in on his side and driving away.
I pulled my backpack to my chest and squeezed it as my mind ran with the right words to say. I’d hidden from him, and I knew that bothered him.
“Are you cold?” he asked, peeking over at me.
“No, I’m fine.”
“Are you scared of me?”
I almost broke my neck looking at him because I wasn’t expecting that.
“No. I wouldn’t have gotten into your car if I was afraid of you.”
“So, why you avoiding me, Kairi? You quit your job and everything.”
My mouth twisted as I choked on my words. When he peered over at me, I could see the hurt and confusion in his eyes.
“Havoc, I’m sorry. I just thought it was better if we stayed away from each other. We both know what could happen if anyone finds out,” I explained, hoping he understood me.
I stared at him as his facial expressions changed, indicating he was battling with his decision too.
“I know,” he said in a low tone. “I thought about that too.”
At least I knew it wasn’t only me.
“There’s too much at risk, Havoc.”
“Makari. I want you to call me by my name,” he said, ignoring my warning of risks being involved in what we were doing.
I turned to look out of the window. Him requesting I called him by his name hit me in a deep place for some reason, and I was trying to stay away from more reasons to like him!
I noticed he didn’t ask for directions to my house and knew that he was taking me to his condo.
“Do you think we should be alone again after what happened?” I asked. He frowned slightly and licked his thick lips.
“I just want to talk to you, but if you don’t want to go in, we don’t have to.”
Again, I was silent, hesitation hindering my words from forming. We remained silent for the rest of the ride to his condo. When he pulled up and cut the engine, he turned to look at me.
“It’s your choice,” he said.
I sat motionless, still clutching my backpack.
“What are we doing, Makari?” I asked him.
“Whatever you want to do,” was his response. I simpered because it wasn’t that simple.
“I know what you’re worried about, Kairi. It bothers me too, but this just feels right, and I can’t walk away. I’ve tried.”
We’d slept together two weeks ago, and tonight was the first time I’d seen him, showing me that he’d tried to stay away too.
“Are you hiding from me because it’s what you want to do or because you think that’s what other people want you to do?” he asked. His question hit me. My eyes bounced his way.
I wanted to stay away from him because I knew my daddy and Shakur would want that. I wanted to stay away from him because he belonged to Ocean, but what did I want?
As I looked at him, I didn’t recoil when he leaned over to kiss my lips. I kissed him back. I didn’t stop myself from following him up to his condo, and I didn’t stop when he removed my clothes. I kissed him back. Held him back. Gave him my body back—I did what I wanted to do!