Chapter 24
Nathan
“That was delicious.”
Nathan feels like he’s glowing with sheer pride at the compliment, especially coming from someone who can actually cook. “Thanks. I’m so happy it turned out okay.”
“Better than okay. Seriously, it was delicious. I’d eat it all over again if I could.”
“There’s more, you know. I can get you a second helping if you want?”
“I’m good. Don’t want to be too full.” Will winks as he stacks their plates, pushing his chair back and sauntering over to the sink. “You cooked, I’ll clean up.”
Nathan’s cheeks flush at the implication. He kept the portions deliberately on the small side, carbohydrate-induced sleepiness the very last after-dinner activity on his mind.
There are a few contenders for the top of the list. Most of them lead to the same outcome, meandering their way to his preferred destination or running there with enthusiasm.
Dessert is strawberries and whipped cream, an invitation to feed each other and lick cream from wherever it might accidentally end up.
There’s still a little more champagne in the bottle, which could very easily be consumed in the bath together.
Or they could just go to bed.
Actually, Nathan’s not too fussy—it’d be totally fine if they didn’t even make it out of the kitchen.
The past few weeks have been both more than he’d ever dreamt of and not enough, a dichotomy he’s happy will be resolved tonight.
Although he’s not sure he’ll ever get enough of Will, with his beautiful body and even more beautiful soul, full of love and care and romance.
Because tonight would be his first time and also theirs, didn’t he deserve the world?
Nathan would happily have settled for Will’s bedroom, but his boyfriend insisted. No matter how sweet the taste of temptation, Will would slow them down and redirect their desires, the word romance an apology and a promise murmured velvet soft in his ear.
If he didn’t know better, he would think Will a masochist. But he does know better, knowledge built from endless conversation, pasts shared with varying levels of vulnerability.
He knows about Kai, and the boyfriends before him, held at a distance and cared for but not cherished.
He knows how carefully Will guarded his heart, bears the faintly guilt-tinged ache of knowing why he did it.
He sees romance for what it is. A symbol of everything Will hasn’t given in the past, his heart tied with a silky red bow, a gift no one else has come close to receiving. A first of a different kind, for him, giving heart and body as one.
Nathan crosses the kitchen, wraps his arms around Will’s waist as he finishes the dishes. “Do you want dessert?”
He leans back, sighing happily. “I’m just the right level of full. You?”
“Is this where I make a joke about having you for dessert?”
Will’s laughter vibrates against Nathan’s chest. “A joke? Sure?”
“You’re right.” Nathan angles his head, nuzzles his way through a tangle of dark curls to bestow a kiss to the soft skin of Will’s neck. “Deadly serious.”
Will turns off the tap and squeezes Nathan’s forearms with damp hands. “Let’s go sit by the fire.”
“Oh, in front of the fire? Romantic.” Nathan takes his hand and tugs him out of the kitchen, anticipation crackling over his skin.
Will lets himself be tugged. “Just for a little while. Then we’ll go upstairs.”
Anticipation gives way to enthusiasm, sharp and breathless.
A little while involves the last of the champagne, sitting side by side on the floor with their legs stretched out, feet toasty in the warmth of the fire long reduced to glowing embers.
Nathan lets his head drop onto Will’s shoulder, lets him bury kisses into his hair, untangling their hands to splay his fingers wide and possessive over Will’s thigh.
“Are you ready for tonight, my Nate?”
“Prepped, clean as anything, good to go.” A chuckle rises at the look Will gives him. “I know that's not what you meant, love, but I’ve been ready for weeks. Are you?”
“What do you mean?”
“You know. Going to bed with someone you have actual serious feelings for.”
“Ah. With the only person I’ve ever loved, you mean.” Will scatters another few kisses into Nathan’s hair. “I want to make it good for you.”
“I know you will. Shall we…?”
Will answers with a kiss. The best kind of Will kiss, the kind that’s heavy with love and passion alike. The kind that prompts Nathan’s lips to part in a needy sigh, that invites the slow melding of their mouths. The kind that Nathan just knows Will won’t halt this time.
Will holds his hand tight as they climb the narrow staircase, making for an awkward ascent. He doesn’t mind, enjoying being led, a portent of what’s to come.
Will lets go as they enter the bedroom, moving around the room to light a multitude of candles in frosted glass jars. Nathan perches at the end of the bed, sinking into the kind of pillowy bedding that makes you feel like you’re cocooned in a cloud.
“More romance?”
Will glances back over his shoulder as he stoops to light a church candle in a lantern on the floor. “Never enough romance for you. How’s the bed?”
He pats the space beside him, hand sinking into the fluffy duvet. “Lonely.”
“Okay, okay. Nearly there.”
Logically speaking, Nathan knows he should be at least a little nervous. It’s almost paradoxical how many firsts are bundled up in tonight.
But it’s Will. Years of thinking about him (guiltily, until recently, and then just piningly) coupled with weeks of physical pleasure that stopped short of making all his fantasies reality, well…
Yearning wore the edge off nerves years ago.
Mutual pleasure ground the edge into nothingness these past few weeks, leaving nothing but a smooth curve of trust and desire.
Will sits down beside him, both hands moving deliberately upwards to frame Nathan’s face before he leans in for a kiss.
It’s perfect. Nathan can feel Will’s desire in every brush of his lips, in the gentleness of the fingers exploring the shape of his jaw. When they break apart, he knows that the shy smile on Will’s face is the twin of his own.
The first flush of his love for Will felt like fireworks, dazzling and extravagant. The love he feels now is so much more, dazzle dampened and mellowed, the glow of stars in a moonlit sky.
Nathan stands, nudging his way between Will’s knees, tugging his T-shirt up, up, letting the candlelight catch his skin, brown rendered glowing and golden.
Will helps, tossing the fabric aside and mirroring Nathan’s actions, pulling him down into his lap and running his lips along the line of his collarbone, an endless stream of kisses.
It feels wonderful, his lips yielding a wake of tingling sensation. It feels like worship.
Nathan’s fingers find their way to Will’s shoulder blades, tracing the shape of muscle and bone beneath skin. Clutches him closer as the trail of kisses rises up his neck, tilting his head to hint him towards the tender spot just below his ear.
“Oh god, Will, what you do to me.” Nathan’s voice is husky already, body rousing with almost Pavlovian predictability as Will mouths at his skin.
He doesn’t bother to reply, simply humming his agreement before he changes direction, working his way slowly along his jawline. Nathan grabs his chin, redirecting him into a kiss, revelling in the feeling of Will’s desire growing beneath him.
He grinds his hips downwards, just a little. Then a lot, because a little’s too little, and because he can. Hands settle firmly at his waist, pulling him down slightly as Will presses up, and then he’s gasping, desire igniting straight into lust.
The rest of their clothes are hastily torn off.
Maybe even literally torn off; there’s a noise that sounds suspiciously like a button pinging off somewhere, but Nathan can’t bring himself to care.
Not when Will’s increasingly naked in front of him, all flawless skin and firm flesh and the most beautiful cock he’s ever seen.
“You’re so beautiful,” Will murmurs.
Nathan drags his eyes upwards. Will’s gaze is hungry, sweeping over his body decadently slowly, tracing every line with an intensity he can nearly feel on his skin. “So are you.”
Brown eyes snap back to his. “Not as beautiful as you. You look like an artist’s sculpted you from marble or something. Like one of the Old Masters.” Fingertips skate gently over his abs, tracing the furrows deliberately.
“Kinda comes with the job.” Nathan swallows, feeling himself twitch as Will’s fingers move to the line cutting diagonally down from his hip.
Will loves that line, for some reason, his fingers pressing in tight whenever he takes Nathan’s cock into his mouth.
“And I hope you’re not saying everything is like one of those statues… ”
Will chuckles, fingers moving determinedly downwards. “Oh no. Especially not here.”
Nathan shivers when Will touches his cock, even though his fingers are now as familiar as his own.
“Always wondered why those sculptures were so disproportionate.” Will strokes him again. “Now I know. If they looked like you, none of the other artworks would get a look in. Galleries would be stuffed full of horny gay men.”
“I’d like to be stuffed full of horny gay man.” Nathan reaches out with both hands and tugs Will closer by his hips, sucking in a sharp breath as their bodies connect, skin against skin.
A heartbeat later, he’s wrestled onto the bed, landing flat on his back with Will draped on top of him. “So much for romance.”
Nathan giggles. “I have faith in you. I know you’ll stuff me romantically.”
His eyes sparkle and then turn sombre. “It’s never been like this for me before, you know.”
He’s so close. It’s easy for Nathan to stretch up, brush his lips slowly against Will’s. “What do you mean?”
“I’ve never felt… comfortable, like this. Never really talked like this.” Another kiss, this one almost a little shy. “Sex has always been hot and heavy. Not… playful.”
A faint twist of worry materialises in Nathan’s belly. “Is it okay? I could shut up, if you want?”