Alpha Kane

[ 26 ] - honesty

"I'm Marigold, Kane," I revealed, turning to face him. My knees pressed against his. "That's what my first words to you would've been..."

There were deeper furrows in his eyebrows now. "What?"

"I'm Marigold," I repeated, astonished. "It's a nickname that I haven't heard for three years because my grandma who gave it to me died. I-it was too painful to hear it from anyone but her, and so I shut it out. Mari didn't even ring a bell."

Kane stared at me with desperation in his eyes, like he was slowly taking it in that we had been mates from the very beginning, and allowing himself to believe it was true.

There wasn't anyone else. I wasn't his second chance mate.

I expelled the air in my lungs in relief.

"I'm going to kiss you now, Rina," he announced. I didn't say anything as he cupped my face and leaned forward. His lips were soft against mine, and the kiss felt a far cry from the last one we had. "We would've met. In every timeline, we are meant to be."

I lifted my hands to hold his wrists and breathed in softly. "I'm sorry," I apologised, opening my eyes. "I thought I was your second choice—I thought that's why you hid it."

His forehead rubbed against mine as he shook his head. "There has never been anyone but you."

We stood up and his arms came around me comfortingly. I finally allowed myself to relax in his warm embrace. His hand gently caressed my upper arm. I tilted my head back to meet his gaze. He stared down at me like he was committing this moment to memory.

"Please, Rina..." The back of his hand brushed against my cheek. "If I ever do anything that angers or upsets you, just talk to me. I will never tell you how to feel, but we need to communicate to solve our problems."

I nodded. "Okay."

He finally cracked a small smile. "I know I can just read your mind, but hearing your voice makes me feel closer to you. I want you to know that you can come to me about anything."

I closed my eyes and leaned my forehead on his chest. "I know that, Kane," I sighed. "God, this has been an intense two days."

He held me tighter at that. "Because of me. I'm sorry, baby." He pressed a kiss on my head. "I'll make it up to you, I promise."

"Just...don't hide things from me anymore, okay?" I mumbled into his chest.

"I won't. I thought I was doing the right thing by not telling you. The last thing I wanted was for you to feel the way you have the past two days."

"Thank god that it turned out in my favour, but what hurt was thinking that you don't feel like you can be an open book with me. I never expected there to be secrets between us."

He rested his cheek on my head. "I'll work on it. It's not that I don't want to be—I just have so much on my shoulders and have for so long that I never learned how to share my feelings or the burden."

"You don't need to shoulder it alone anymore. That's why I'm here."

My chest felt lighter than before. He could feel that the pain in my heart had lessened. I looked up at him again. Until I marked him, I wouldn't be able to feel his emotions. I didn't need to just yet to know that the past two days had been intense for him too, especially during the full moon.

I remembered how he had cried when he saw he had forcefully marked me.

An alpha on his knees for his luna.

"Can we just pretend for one night?" I asked, lifting my hand to his face.

When he looked confused, I continued. "Since before we even met, things have been happening to us that we have had no say in.

Why don't we just have one night where we forget it all—the spell, the blackouts, the brands.

Why don't we just act like two mates who met naturally and take back control of our relationship? "

His eyes slowly brightened. "We can do that." He took a step back and smiled. "I don't think we've met." He held out his hand. "I'm Kane."

My expression mirrored his and I shook his hand. We knew what my first words to him would've been. That Rina would've felt safe enough to remember her grandma and tell him the name that was close to her heart. He deserved both versions. "You can call me Marigold, like the flower."

In response, he tugged me closer and covered my mouth with his. I laughed and he cupped my face. "I told you I'd kiss you." He kissed me gently, nipping my bottom lip.

"Told me what? I've just met you," I murmured against his lips.

He clicked his tongue and gave me a peck. "You're right. I'm just very forward and kissed you because you're the most beautiful woman I've ever seen."

I looked up into his eyes and smiled. "You're not so bad yourself. In fact," I started, lightly brushing my fingertip down the slope of his nose. "You're incredibly handsome."

"Great." He took my hand and kissed my fingertips. "That means we're going to have some beautiful babies. Six, I think."

My jaw dropped. "Six?"

"Fine," he sighed playfully, "a boy and a girl."

I played along. "And what would we name them?"

His arms wound around my waist and he pulled me closer. I linked mine around his neck. "Strong names because they'll be strong, like their parents."

"Who do you think they'll take after?"

The tip of his nose brushed against mine. "I think it'll be a perfect mix—as long as they have your heart."

"I want them," I said, breathily, "to have your eyes."

It had taken a long time, but I was finally at the place where I felt that I could truly let go of the grip that my nightmares had on me. I thought back to when I had first met his mother and saw that he had her eyes. Someone with eyes so soft couldn't be a monster, in my dreams or otherwise.

He leaned back slightly. His breathing was slow and soft as he gazed into my eyes. His hands curled around my sides and he dipped his head to kiss me. It didn't feel like he was pretending that we had just met. Instead, he kissed me like he had known me his whole life.

"I want a family with you—you are my family," he whispered, sliding his cheek against mine and nestling his face into the crook of my neck. He lifted me off my feet.

I hugged him tightly and felt his lips brush against my mark. A shiver passed through me—the good kind—and I allowed myself to imagine that he had marked me the way I had always imagined.

We would have been in each other's arms, talking about anything and everything when he would turn to me and ask if he could mark me. It would have brought us closer, and I would have marked him at the same time.

We would've shared that significant moment.

I almost got lost in the thought and had to quickly stop my canines from coming down. His pulse was nice and steady, and taking in his scent made me want to do it.

I placed my feet back on the ground and slid a hand over the back of his head. Now that I was finally relaxed, the hunger hit me with full force. We hadn't finished our leftovers for breakfast, so now, it would be dinner again.

Kane was so in tune with me that he spoke before I could. "Would you like to have dinner with me, Marigold?"

My heart warmed and I nodded. "I'd like that."

He took my hand and led me to the kitchen. He helped me to my seat on the island. He had put our food away, and it was interesting to see that he had decided not to finish his despite being at the house all day. I quickly knew it was because eating together was our thing.

"I'm pretty sure this is going to be one of the best things you've ever had," he boasted, putting our food in the oven to warm it up.

He looked through one of the cupboards and pulled out a few candles. I watched him silently as he lit them and placed them around the island.

"Dinner with a view, huh?" I replied, not hiding my appraisal of him. His short-sleeved shirt did nothing to hide his muscles.

He broke character for a second and rested his hands on the island. "Careful, Rina. You look at me like that and dinner is the last thing on my mind."

"I don't know what you're talking about, Kane." I leaned forward on my elbows. "I'm looking at you how I always do."

He chuckled. "If that were true, Kane Junior would be on his way by now."

I laughed, caught off guard. "Kane Junior? That's what you'd want to name our son?"

He smiled and shook his head. "I'm messing with you, but seriously, unless you want us to take that step, clean thoughts, especially now that I can read them."

The challenge sparked in my eyes as I thought of him without his shirt. His jaw tightened and he held my gaze.

"I just met you. You can't possibly know what I'm thinking." I leaned my chin on my palm and smiled at him. His eyes had darkened slightly and he looked like he was seconds away from closing the distance between us.

The oven timer rang, snapping him out of his trance. Saved by the bell.

He pulled out the dish and plated it up for us again. When he put my plate in front of me, his fingers touched mine. I watched the goosebumps rise on his bare skin and glanced up at him.

"Clean thoughts," he mumbled to himself, leaning forward and pecking my forehead. "I want this to be the best first date ever."

I closed my eyes as he lingered in my space. Just one night.

—————

"I'm thinking we tell Santiago that I once had your words on my wrist," Kane said as we lay in bed the next morning. "Maybe it changes things—I mean, how did they disappear?"

I sighed and played with his fingers. "I don't know. Maybe it happened when the spell was cast."

Kane looked up at the ceiling. "The timing makes sense. Have you heard anything from your parents?"

I shook my head. "My mum's contact at the nearby coven came up empty on names. She did say, though, that the spell was cast with powerful magic—blood magic."

"And we have no idea how to find out who it is?" Kane's voice was deepening in anger.

"My mum said she needs time. All spells have a signature from the one who casts them, especially blood magic. She said the coven will find out for us."

He sat up and rubbed his hands over his face. "I already don't like the fact that more people know now. Covens are neutral when it comes to our affairs, but what happens if this somehow gets back to Leander and he uses it to his advantage?"

I sat up too and laid my hand on his back. I rested my chin on his shoulder. "She didn't mention his name at all, or yours. She only told them that it was happening to me."

He tilted his head and I planted a soft kiss on his cheek. "Okay. We should work it from both angles. I trust Santiago more than I do the coven."

"At this point, we should get him his own place here."

Kane laughed and turned his upper body to face me. "I'm sure he prefers Belgian food."

"Fair point." I reached for his phone on the nightstand. "It's eleven a.m. for him now."

He took his phone from me and found Santiago's contact. It rang a few times before he picked up. He put it on speakerphone. "Morning, Santiago. I haven't caught you at a bad time, have I?"

"No. I'm on my morning walk. What can I help you with? Is everything okay?"

"Well," he started, "a few things have happened since we last saw you. I had another blackout during the full moon. I ended up marking Rina during it." He glanced at me before forcing his gaze away.

Santiago gasped lightly. "Is she okay?"

I leaned forward and placed a hand on Kane's arm. "I'm okay. We also learned that Kane had something on his wrist years before he met me. Something I would have said."

"Hmm," Santiago replied. "This certainly provides more insight. When you say learned, what do you mean? How did you find out?"

Kane blew out a breath. "I've always known it. I just wasn't sure if I should share it."

Santiago was silent for a long moment. "Is there anything else I need to know?"

I looked at Kane who grimaced.

"I think this conversation is better to have in person. Would you like us to come to you?"

"No, I'll come to you. You shouldn't be away from your pack if you had another blackout. Let me sort a few things out and I'll get the next flight. I can be there by the evening."

"Okay, great. I'll have Finn and Carmen pick you up from Edinburgh."

"Vale. I'll see you both soon."

Kane hung up and dropped his phone on the bed. "I wish I knew for sure that Leander is responsible for this. I'd make him have it undone immediately."

I linked our hands together. "What'll change once the spell is broken? No more blackouts?"

He nodded and turned my hand over to touch my wrist. "No more pain when we're apart either. It'll just be us, building a life together like we're supposed to."

"We still have things to look forward to, Kane," I responded quietly. "My initiation ceremony, leading this pack together, starting a family..."

He lifted my head with a gentle hand to my face. "You're right. I'm sorry. I just want it all to happen on our terms. I already marked you when you weren't ready. I don't want this spell to rob us of anything else."

I leaned my head into his hand. "It won't. We can still fight against it, we are fighting against it."

He tipped his head upwards and kissed my forehead. "Come on, I promised the pups at the primary school that we'd come and see their artwork."

I smiled. Even if things felt dark, our pack was the light.

We spent the afternoon with the children and as evening approached, I could hardly forget that we were going on a pack run this evening before Santiago would arrive.

A pack run meant seeing Kane in wolf form again, and this time, I couldn't choose not to shift with him.

He was packing the towels and a spare change of clothes (if we needed them) when I made my way back to the bedroom. He sensed my presence immediately and turned to face me with a charming smile.

"I wasn't sure what you'd want so I packed some joggers and a hoodie."

"Thanks." I barely felt the nervousness before he spoke again.

"You're nervous to see my wolf," he stated.

I huffed a laugh through my nose. "How did you know?" I joked.

"Why don't I shift now, so you can get used to seeing me? Just like I did with the partial shift before Christmas."

I wrung my hands together and squeezed. "We could do that."

He pressed his lips together and nodded. He tugged his shirt over his head, and I was immediately in a trance seeing his bare skin. The muscles tensed underneath it and I couldn't help but want to run my hands over his toned chest and across his broad shoulders.

"Focus, Rina," he breathed out deeply.

My face felt hot as I slowly spun on my heel to face the door.

He was right. I had to focus. I heard him unzip his jeans and seconds later, the sound of his bones shifting to accommodate his wolf form.

I sensed a change in the air. His scent in wolf form was slightly different. It smelled of nature.

I took slow and deep breaths and turned back around. He cast a shadow over me with his large frame, and the room suddenly felt smaller. His golden eyes stared into mine and I instantly heard his voice in my mind.

'Just focus on my voice, baby. I'm in control and I'm not going to hurt you.'

My mark throbbed on my neck. Before, I felt nothing but fear when looking at Kane's wolf. Now, I felt connected to him. The mark altered my DNA and it was no longer ingrained in me to fear him.

I blew out a breath and stepped forward. Kane lowered himself onto his legs and dipped his head to the ground. He was showing me he wasn't a threat.

I kneeled and raised my hand to caress his dark fur. His eyes closed as I took my hand down the expanse of his back. Even in wolf form, I could feel the power that simmered under the surface. I sat back on my heels and lifted his head with a hand underneath his jaw.

His muzzle twitched as his eyes opened. I slowly leaned forward and for the first time while he was in wolf form, I rested my forehead on his. His canines peeked through as he huffed.

I kissed him between his eyes before he rubbed his head against my cheek. He raised himself on his forelegs and brought his muzzle against my skin, inhaling deeply. He made me laugh when he began leaving his scent on me. He circled me and licked at the bare skin of my arms.

"Hey!" I chuckled, twisting my body to face him.

He eluded me and padded to my left. His tail lightly thumped against the floor. He was happy. It was the first time that I was seeing his wolf being playful. It was nice.

'I couldn't resist, sorry. Smelling my scent mixed with yours is driving me crazy.' He lowered his head underneath my arm. 'Get on and we'll go to the clearing like this.'

"I don't even have shoes on, Kane!" my cheeks were already hurting from smiling so much.

'You don't need them. Come on.'

I stood up and put the backpack on. He leaned down to allow me to climb onto his back. I lay flat against him and wrapped my arms around his neck. "I've never ridden someone in wolf form before."

'Good. Now hold on.'

I yelped into his fur when he took off swiftly. He didn't bother with the stairs and instead leapt down the flights. I gripped onto him for dear life and when he came to an abrupt stop by the front door, I pinched his ear.

"If you drop me, I swear to God, Kane, I'll—"

'I promise I won't drop you. Open the door.'

I pulled on the handle and he finally acted civilised when he slowly trotted out of the house and waited for me to shut it behind us. I should've taken my time, because as soon as I closed it, he took off again.

Halfway through the run, I allowed myself to relax and took my face out of his back. The trees were blurring from how fast he was going. I sat up and tangled my fingers in his thick mane. It felt exhilarating and I couldn't wait to shift myself.

When we arrived at the clearing, the pack had already gathered. Everyone instantly noticed that I was on his back and a few of them chuckled.

"He wanted to get a head start. I think we can all shift now."

As everyone began preparing for it, I slid off Kane and started jumping from the ice on my feet.

"You don't need shoes, he said, Come on, he said," I grumbled, yanking the bag off and pulling my shirt up.

He gave me a wolfish grin, but turned around and shielded me from view with his body. As soon as I shifted, he rubbed his body against mine, taking in my scent again. His tongue flattened against my fur and he pressed his muzzle against my mark.

I shivered and felt my paws sink into the snow.

Claiming me in human form also meant claiming my wolf, and I was finally able to fully recognise him as my alpha when he had done so.

His power demanded attention. I lowered my head in submission and only lasted a moment before he placed his head below mine and lifted it.

'Tonight, I'm just your mate.'

I stared into his fiery gold eyes, seeing the specks of dark amber. Beautiful. I pushed his muzzle with mine playfully.

He turned to our pack and gestured with his head for them to follow us. My limbs burned as I kept up with his pace, but for the first time in three years, I felt free as I ran alongside him and our pack.

We ran for an hour, dipping and weaving between the trees and through to the mountains before we made our way back to the clearing. Kane mind-linked me as we came back to the backpack with our clothes.

'We'll change at Finn and Carmen's. Santiago is with them at their house.'

I took the strap into my mouth and followed his lead to their house. We changed outside and I immediately jumped onto Kane's back once I did.

"I am never letting you convince me to leave the house without shoes again."

He caught me and adjusted me higher with firm hands around the back of my thighs. His body shook with laughter. "I'm sorry. I wouldn't mind giving you a piggyback if it happens again, though."

I lightly bit his ear and he laughed harder. He knocked on the door and Carmen opened it with an amused expression.

"I've got some socks for you upstairs, Luna. Come on in."

Kane put me down once we were standing in the living room. Santiago put his cup of tea down and stood to greet us.

"Alpha. Luna, I wish we were meeting again under better circumstances." He stepped forward and shook our hands.

"Likewise," Kane responded.

Santiago looked at my mark for a moment before smiling. It wasn't hard to miss the anxiety behind it. "Let's get started, shall we?"