14. Jack
It’s been over two months since my sister went missing and there has been practically no updates from the police. The case seems to have completely stalled, at least from an outside perspective. I understand that since I’m not a cop they aren’t going to keep me fully looped in but at this point I’m starting to worry there isn’t any evidence even in the loop.
After a few weeks of waiting with zero updates, I finally decided to seek out Detective Macy myself. Thankfully, he’s willing to have a quick debriefing when I call and ask but he makes it very clear that it will be short and to the point.
I march through the fresh snow and into the police station, sighing in relief when the heat from inside blows over me as I open the door. The station is surprisingly busy and I have to wait in line for a few minutes before the receptionist is able to check me in. Detective Macy looks a bit worse for wear when he finally comes over to greet me and his eyes look a lot more tired than the last time I saw him. He guides us to a small interview room and gestures for me to have a seat.
“Any chance of a Christmas miracle?”
“I’m afraid not, Jack. The evidence that was left behind was minimal and we weren’t able to get a warrant to get DNA from Alex Callister.”
“Can’t you just get it off a pizza crust like they did with that Gilgo Beach killer?” The detective squints at me like he’s actually considering it for a moment.
“You like to follow serial killer cases?”
“Not really, I didn’t even think serial killers were really still a thing until the whole pizza crust aspect went kind of viral. It was all over my Facebook feed for a while.” Detective Macy stares me down like he’s trying to determine if I’m a deranged serial killer fan or if I truly happened upon the information. “It can’t be that hard to follow Alex and snag his coffee cup out of a public trash can.”
“Things always look easier from the outside.” Macy runs a hand through his balding hair and it’s clear this case is stressing him out.
I would feel bad for the man but in all honesty I want him to be stressed and I want that stress to help motivate him to find my sister’s killer. I want closure and I want Jess to have justice. I may not be able to bring her back but I’m sure as hell going to do everything in my power to get justice, even if that means lighting a fire under this detective’s ass.
“Have you tried following him to see if he’s met up with Eric Lloyd again?”
“We’ve had him under surveillance for quite a while, ever since I saw those pictures, but both men seem to be keeping a distance from each other. I’ve been working on getting a warrant for phone records but so far it’s been denied so we’ll need more evidence before we can really pursue that avenue. Unfortunately, until we find something more incriminating we’re at a real standstill. Homicide cases take time.”
“It’s already been two months.”
“Two months is a short span when it comes to a case like this but I’m doing everything in my power to find out who did this and bring justice to your sister. It’s just going to take some time and a lot of patience but I’m confident that we’ll get there.”
I sigh and thank Macy for his time, shake his hand, and head back to my Jeep. Detective Macy might be fine with waiting around hoping answers fall into his lap but I’m not.
I’ve been following Eric Lloyd around for the last few days but it’s quickly becoming apparent that he doesn’t actually leave his property very often. In the last three days that I’ve been parked on the other side of the busy road, concealed by some trees and overgrown bushes, he’s only left twice. I followed a few cars behind and didn’t turn off when he went to the grocery store the first time and the post office the second.
The man seems to be a recluse. No one visits him during the three days I watch and he doesn’t visit friends even when it’s a Saturday. I wish he had a shorter driveway so I could see onto his property but his gate and the long winding way make it nearly impossible to make anything out.
I’ve been watching until late at night and then slipping into bed with Benji around midnight. When he asked what I’ve been working on and why I’ve been gone so much I contemplated lying, if only because I don’t want him with me if things do go south or if I get arrested for stalking, but the idea of lying to him twists a knot in my stomach.
His reaction is surprisingly subdued and he just comments that he would help keep me company but he’s super busy with Christmas mini photo shoots right now. Benji is almost as busy as I am and when I slip into bed and curl up behind him he doesn’t even stir.
Instead of following Eric, who seems to do absolutely nothing of interest, I start following Alex Callister. Alex is on the go constantly and after following him casually for a few days I realize it’ll be easier to try to befriend him instead. I already know one place that Alex will be several times a week so it only seems logical to start there.
It feels a bit surreal walking into the CrossFit gym that Jessica dedicated so much time to. She was always begging me to go to classes with her but I prefer to do some cardio and casually lift weights at my normal gym. CrossFit has always seemed a bit extreme but she loved that aspect and the challenge it posed. I’m definitely not going to have the strength or flexibility to jump onto massive plyo boxes like Jess could but I’m hoping my hours in the gym will at least keep me from embarrassing myself.
I spent a lot of time thinking about how I’d approach Alex and get friendly but it turns out that was unnecessary because the second I walk in he’s all over me like an over-eager puppy.
“Jack Jansen is that you?”
“Uh hey, you’re Alec right?”
“Alex, Alex Callister. Still so sorry about what happened to Jessica.”
Something about that phrasing makes my heckles rise but I’m not sure if that’s just because I’m already suspicious of Alex or if it’s actually a weird way of saying sorry for your loss.
“Thanks, I thought it might make me feel closer to her in some way if I kind of took up her hobby, you know?”
“Yeah, for sure man. Jessie loved it here and we can workout together like her and I used to. I’ll help you get super fit. It looks like you’re already in good shape but CrossFit can take you to the next level.”
I hold back my cringe because my sister hated being called Jessie. It was always Jess or Jessica but never Jessie. When we were kids she would really snap down on anyone who tried calling her Jessie, even our parents. So Alex calling her that makes me wonder how well he knew my sister and more importantly…if he respected her boundaries at all.
Calling someone by a name they’ve said they hate, and I’m positive she would have corrected him, is a good indication that they aren’t respecting boundaries. If Alex didn’t respect that simple boundary, it makes me wonder what other boundaries he didn’t respect.
“I haven’t really tried it before so I’d definitely appreciate having someone lead the way.” I don’t want to push too much about Jessica and have Alex get suspicious. I decide to let him bring her up naturally and steer the conversation so he feels like he’s in control while we’re still getting to know each other.
“How do you normally workout? I can definitely tell you hit the gym.”
“I usually just do some cardio on the treadmill or the stair climber and then lift weights. Sometimes if the line isn’t too long I spend a bit on Jacob’s ladder. I’m kind of casual with my routine but I do go 4-5 times a week consistently.”
Alex nods and leads me over to some large ropes. He shows me how to swing them and by the time I’ve finished a few reps my arms are on fire. I usually lift fairly heavy when I workout but the motions are new and the rope is surprisingly heavy.
“Fuck. And Jessica did this almost everyday?” I shake my arms out and try to at least keep some dignity as we move towards the boxes I already know I’ll fail at.
“Oh yeah, she was really dedicated and shockingly strong. That’s one of the things that really attracted me to her. She held her own even when some workouts had dudes twice her size throwing up.”
Alex demonstrates jumping onto a tall pylo box and makes it look easy. Thankfully, he pulls out a much more reasonably sized box for me and after a few attempts I’m able to jump on and off. My legs quickly start feeling heavy from the low squat and the amount of exertion required to jump that high.
While my main intention with coming here has been to get closer to Alex in the hopes that he might slip up and say something incriminating… I can’t deny that I actually do feel closer to Jessica. I regret not taking her up on her offers to workout together but as I follow a beginner version of the workout she loved it does make me feel like I’m connecting with her in some way.
We move onto kettlebell swings, burpees, pull-ups, and then hanging leg raises. By the time we finish the last set I’m dripping with sweat and chugging water.
“It’s one hell of a workout, right? Takes some getting used to the different movements but you’ll see a lot of progress fast if you stick with it. Jessica took me under her wing when I first started.”
“How long ago did you start?” The more important question that he’ll be answering is how long ago did you meet my sister.
“I’d say like nine months ago. When we met I could barely do the box jump and she whipped me right into shape. We worked out together like four or five times a week for months.”
“She always used to invite me but I thought CrossFit sounded kind of extreme but it’s not as bad as I thought. I do feel more admiration towards her because it definitely isn’t easy.”
“No, it definitely isn’t. It’s too bad you didn’t get to see her in action though because she made it look easy and effortless. She could have been a personal trainer or done those online workout videos.”
“Yeah, she made a lot of things look easy. Her heart was definitely set on real estate though.”
“So much lost potential. We could have started a brokerage together and really been together, you know? We would have made a real power couple.”
Since Alex is the one bringing it up I feel like it’s a good moment to ask some clarifying questions about his perception of his relationship with Jess. I know she wasn’t interested in working together or a long term relationship but the way he’s phrasing things it sounds like he was under some delusion that they could have been more.
“I hadn’t talked to her too much in the last few months.” This is a straight up lie but I’m not sure how else to play ignorant. “Were you guys dating exclusively?”
“Well, yeah. We had been together for months. We had all these plans about how we were going to get married and I’d get my brokerage license so we could open a real estate company together.”
“Oh, I had no idea it was getting that serious. She probably planned on introducing you during the holidays. Was she unhappy at her brokerage?” I’m lying through my teeth but Alex seems to relax and begins talking more freely with each passing moment as we sit and sip our waterbottles.
“More like onto bigger and better things. We planned to open our own place so that we’d get more of the take-home pay and not have to split it with the brokerage. Plus, Jessica and I liked the power couple idea of being a husband and wife duo.”
I know for a fact my sister was interested in no such thing but I nod empathetically and play along anyways. I can’t tell if Alex is actually delusional or if he’s just talking out his ass now that Jessica isn’t here to dispute his story. Some people make up shit after people they know pass to get attention or make the relationship seem closer than it actually was. I’m not sure if what Alex is saying is incriminating or just attention-seeking behavior. I do know he’s lying through his teeth as much as I am.
“That makes sense. It uh must have come as quite a shock when they found out she was on a date the night she was murdered.” I know for a fact that the police haven’t released that information publicly.
“Yeah, it really did. Maybe she was having a case of cold feet and wanted to get her last kicks in before we got engaged. It definitely hurt that she was on Tinder, I thought she was really loyal. We could have worked through that though.”
Bingo. There’s no way the police told this fucker what Jessica was doing that night so the fact that he knows is kind of all the confirmation I need.
“I’m sorry man, she probably just had the jitters and made a mistake. You think that guy she was on a date with killed her?”
Alex pauses and seems to really consider his next words, which has me a little nervous that he’s onto my suspicions and is going to clam up on me. Finally, he sighs and gives a half shrug.
“Honestly, I’m not sure. I’ve never met the guy so I don’t know if he’s like a bad dude or if it was a wrong place at the wrong time kind of situation.”
Bingo a-fucking-gain. I know for a fact those two know each other, I saw them laughing and chatting it up with my own eyes. These last two lies are the most glaring and while I’m not sure if he’s delusional or just straight-up lying about his relationship with my sister I do know one thing: this man was definitely involved in her murder. And if the police aren’t going to catch him I sure as fuck will.
When I finally get home from the bar my entire body is stiff and I can feel a bone-deep soreness setting in. Benji is already lounging on my couch, his laptop on his knees, and his brow furrowed adorably. He looks so at home here and I’m relieved he took the key I left on a paper with a heart on it a few mornings ago. He comes and goes as he pleases now and a few days later an ostentatious pink key with little red hearts on it showed up on my counter. As silly as it is, I feel a wave of butterflies every time I look at my keyring and see it.
“Hey baby, how was your day?”
“It was fine. Are you okay? You’re walking kind of funny.”
Benji sets his laptop aside and stands to greet me, wrapping his arms around my chest and burrowing his face into my chest. I wrap my arms around him and kiss the top of his head, taking a deep breath in to smell my own shampoo in his hair. The possessive part of me loves that he smells like me and that he’s spending enough time at my place that he smells like my toiletries more often than his own. I’m still hoping I’ll eventually convince him to move in together so we can wake up together every single morning and go to bed completely wrapped up in each other.
“I did CrossFit this morning and it was a lot harder than I thought it would be.”
“CrossFit? Did you decide to give up the stalking gig?”
“Not exactly. Eric never does anything and seems to be a total loner so I decided to follow Alex Callister around but he was all over town all the time. Plus, I thought I could get more information from talking to him.”
“So you joined Jessica’s gym and interviewed him?”
“I kind of let him do all of the talking but yeah. It also turns out that Jessica was a beast because CrossFit is insanely hard. My whole body feels so stiff and sore.”
“You want me to run you a bath with some epsom salt and when you get out I can give you a full body massage to help those stiff muscles of yours?”
I groan and nod because fuck that sounds like heaven. Benji slips from our embrace and heads to the bathroom. I toe off my shoes and get a quick drink of water before I join him. I was hoping Benji would be naked already but much to my disappointment he’s still fully clothed. The bathroom is steaming up and the smell of lavender epsom salts and bath foam fill the air. The tub is nearly full and Benji leans over to turn the tap off, giving me the perfect view of his tight little ass.
Unable to resist, I slide my hands around his waist and pull his ass flush with my half-hard cock. He lets out a chuckle but immediately turns to begin undressing me. His fingers trail my sides as he pulls my shirt over my head, leaving a trail of goosebumps. He then pops into a low squat and unbuttons and slides off my jeans and briefs. When I’m finally bare he pops up before I can take advantage of his position between my legs.
I reach for his shirt but Benji slaps my hand away and I groan in frustration. Instead, he takes my hand and helps guide me to the bath and I step into the hot water. He makes a motion for me to lay back and once I’m comfortably stretched out Benji takes a seat on the rug.
“What’re you doing, baby? Come get in with me.”
“Normally, I would love to but I honestly think what your stiff muscles need is an actual soak and that’ll be a lot more comfortable without me crushing you.
“I have something else that’s stiff.”
“Yeah well if it’s still stiff after the massage, I’ll massage that too. In the meantime, tell me about your conversation with Alex. Did he say anything useful or incriminating?”
“He said a few weird things actually.”
“Like what?” Benji pulls his knees up and rests his chin on them. He looks so adorable that it takes a moment for his question to register.
“He said that Jess and him were talking about marriage. Like seriously talking about it. We already knew he had that weird delusion about starting a brokerage together but when he was talking about their relationship he made it sound like they had been in a serious, committed relationship for months.”
“Well, we also know that isn’t true.”
“Yeah and then I asked him how he felt after he found out she cheated, which I’m sure the police didn’t tell him about.”
“Oh shit, did he confirm he knew she was seeing someone the night she died.”
“Yup. Said he thought she had cold feet and was getting her pre-wedding jitters out.”
“Okay, first of all, no. Jess wouldn’t cheat if she was actually going to marry a dude. She was loyal but she was also super honest with people that marriage wasn’t something that was going to happen in the immediate future. And, I’m positive the police wouldn't have told him she was on a Tinder date…which he specifically mentioned.”
“They’re keeping most information from the public so I agree it’s super unlikely they gave him any specifics so that fact that he knows that it was a Tinder date specially is super suspicious.”
“I also asked him if he thought the date was the one who killed her.”
“Oh shit, what did he say?”
“He paused for the longest time and then said he didn’t know the guy so he wasn’t sure.”
“Which we both know is a lie because you have a picture of them together.”
“Yeah, that part is what I found the most incriminating. He wasn’t wanting to throw Eric under the bus but he also lied to my face about not knowing him. There’s a million other things he could have said. Like fuck, he could have just said ‘I don’t know’ but instead he chose to lie about even knowing Eric. I left pretty much convinced that he killed my sister.”
“At the very least, he had something to do with it. I wonder if he had his buddy Eric join Tinder to see if Jess was accepting dates and then went crazy when he found out she actually was. Maybe he’s the jealous type.”
“At this point, I think that’s a really likely scenario. I think it’s Alex’s DNA and thumbprint are the mysterious third set they found in her car.”
“I hope they can get a freaking warrant soon so we can lock that fucker up.” Benji looks furious and I feel the exact same way. I feel like I found out more in one morning with Alex than the police have in weeks.
I nod and sigh because really what else is there to say. We spend a few more minutes relaxing in a comfortable silence before the water starts to turn chilly and I pull the stop and let the water drain from the tub. Benji hops up and helps wrap me in an oversized towel. The gesture feels so loving that it makes my stomach come alive with butterflies. He has a way of making even the simplest of things feel romantic and special.
We head into my bedroom and Benji gestures for me to lay down while he retrieves a bottle of massage oil from the nightstand. I lay on my stomach and relax into his touch as he begins massaging my feet. He works from one foot to the other and then slowly works over my tired calves and up my thighs. As he works my upper thighs and ass muscles, I feel my cock stiffen again but when I try to roll over he gently presses me down.
He spends a long time working my back and shoulders so I relax and close my eyes, enjoying the feeling of his smaller hands against my tight muscles. Benji moves into a scalp massage, which I’ve never had before and I find myself growing sleepy from relaxation.
When I open my eyes again, the room is completely dark and I’m tucked into the blanket. Benji is snoring softly next to me and for some reason it’s the most soothing sound in the world. I roll over so I can pull him into my arms, a smile pulling on my lips as sleep finds me again. My last thought before I slip into unconsciousness is that this right here is what I want forever; this is who I want forever.