Chapter 17
Seventeen
Lily
Snow was still on the ground. We’d gotten more last night, and today, the wind picked up. The roads were icy in the western half of the state, stretching into Montana.
Eliot: No travel advised.
He wasn’t going to make it.
Disappointment ripped through me like the cold wind outside, leaving a chill behind. I’d been so excited. I had shaved everywhere and even bought some new bras and underwear. I was wearing them under my thick knit sweater and jeans. They would be lost on Halloween, but I could enjoy the effort. I’d wear them tonight when he called.
I adjusted Cali’s black cloak over her winter coat. “Are you sure you don’t want a stocking hat under the witch hat?”
I’d had to rig a tie for the hat to keep it from blowing away while we trick-or-treated. Kellan was tucked into his car seat.
“No hat.” She shook her head. With the way she was bundled up underneath her costume, she looked like an abominable snow witch.
“I’ll pack one, just in case.”
The roads weren’t bad enough to shut us in. I lived close enough to town that the deicer and gravel had been judiciously used.
“Why can’t Eliot come?” Cali asked as I slid into the driver’s seat.
“The roads are too bad.” I coasted down the driveway.
“Ivy’s Snow White.” Cali brandished an apple from her cloak. She managed to coordinate the costume with Ivy at school.
“I heard.”
“Will we get to see the babies?”
Sutton and Wilder had their twins. I’d seen a picture of the boys—Alex and Drew. Eliot had mentioned something about them being named after game show hosts, which made sense with the different sayings Sutton would utter.
In the photo, there were two blue car seats with little babies strapped in. Their cheeks and lips were puffed out, and both were sleeping. We’d been planning to visit them tomorrow when Eliot was with us. “Another time.”
I met Cody and Tova at the grocery store. They were driving the van they used for Tova’s mom’s wheelchair.
Tova poked her head out the large side door. The wind buffeted the strands of hair sticking out from under her cream-colored stocking hat. “Come on in. We have the heat cranked and everyone can sit in the back and the kids can run to the houses.”
Cali dove in while I grabbed Kellan’s seat. He grinned when all the kids greeted them.
Tova wiggled between the front seats and sat in the passenger seat. She twisted around as much as she could when she was due in a month. “We couldn’t go get Mom. The roads are too bad.”
“Eliot can’t make it tonight either,” I said.
Cody glanced in the rearview mirror. “I was hoping he could make it since none of us could help move cattle. How’d Jasper do?”
“My brother had a good time. Said he felt like a kid again.” Jasper had actually been messaging me about his adventures.
Cody coasted up and down neighborhood roads. The kids would dart out on a gust of cold and pile back in, jabbering about the candy they scored. I shot a picture of Cali, Ivy, and Ivy’s brother, Grayson, to Eliot. After an hour, we were dropped back off at the car. I didn’t get a response from Eliot.
At home, I got Kellan to bed while Cali was counting her candy. I stopped to send another text to Eliot. Happy Halloween.
I frowned at the screen for a while. Was he upset he couldn’t make it? Did I do something to make him angry? Carter used to ignore me when I did something to piss him off.
Eliot was not my ex. He wasn’t out messing around because I wasn’t enough. Still, it was hard to shake that old anxiety.
“Bedtime, Cali.”
She stuffed all her candy away. We read a quick book and then I tucked her in.
She snuggled into her blankets. “I miss Eliot.”
I kissed her forehead. “Me too.”
“I’m glad you married him. He’s a nice daddy.”
“Oh, honey.” I smoothed her hair off her face. Eliot had hardly been around, and he took precedence over Carter. While I was grateful he was far better to her than Carter, I dreaded next summer when Eliot and I divorced. She should be in therapy by then. The therapist might not believe my story, but I’d cross that bridge next summer. I gave her another kiss and left her room. I didn’t know what else to say.
Outside her door, I pressed my fingertips to my forehead. “You’ve got to think things through.” My mother-in-law’s voice mingled with my mother’s. “Always so impulsive.”
Was this marriage the right thing? Was having Eliot be a part of my kids’ lives for a year and then saying goodbye to him a smart idea? Did I have a choice?
They had often said similar things. But where Mom’s was advice, my mother-in-law’s had been condemning. In this case, I had to be impulsive. I wasn’t sleeping with Eliot to make sure he didn’t serve me divorce papers before the year was up. But what about after? Should I have thought of that more? I liked him, dammit. I wanted to have sex with him. And I didn’t want to worry about the future.
I went to the living room. I had an hour before bed, and I had the weekend off. I picked a movie and snuggled into the couch. Once or twice or four times, I frowned at my phone. No response from Eliot.
Should I message Jasper and see if he mentioned Eliot?
Too pathetic?
What if Eliot and Jasper were making the best of a guys’ Halloween?
What if my single brother was showing Eliot that he missed the unmarried life? Jasper wouldn’t purposely lead Eliot astray, but would he lead by example?
I needed to shut my mind off.
When the credits rolled, I went to my bedroom and stripped down. Then, I went to the bathroom and started a playlist. A little speaker in my bathroom pumped all the naughty country songs I couldn’t listen to around Cali. I stepped into the bathtub and under the shower spray. Warm water surrounded me, and I soaked it in.
Today had been chilly, both at work and while trick-or-treating. Could that be why I was on edge?
I had just finished rinsing my hair when the bathroom door cracked open.
“What’s wrong, Cali? Can’t sleep?”
The door quietly clicked shut. I pulled the curtain back and yelped. Eliot had his arms crossed and was leaning with his back against the door. His hair was flattened from a ball cap he was no longer wearing, and his eyes were dark and promising. He was like an apparition the steam conjured up.
“Oh my god!” I held the curtain in front of myself. “You’re here?”
He arched a dark brow, his gaze leisurely dropping down my concealed body and roaming back up. The curtain wasn’t opaque. “You don’t have to hide yourself, Lily pad. I promise that what I can see is even better than I imagined.”
Beads of sweat broke out on my brow. The bathroom was suddenly way smaller than it’d ever been. He was here. He’d driven on roads that probably shouldn’t have had a vehicle on them, and he’d come to see me.
My pulse kicked up, and I looked my fill of the rugged man in my bathroom. “You’re overdressed.”
The corner of his mouth kicked up, and he reached behind his head to yank his sweatshirt off. That magnificent chest of his was on display. His pecs rippled as he hung the shirt up on the towel rack. His boots were already off, but he didn’t yank down his jeans. He stuck his hand in a pocket and withdrew several condoms.
“That’s a lot.” Did he plan to use them all this weekend? A shiver traveled over my skin.
“I’ve got more.” He flicked open the fly of his pants and shoved his jeans down.
I clutched the shower curtain closer to me. Oh my. A scattering of hair trailed down his stomach, farther down to… Wow . The last time we did anything, it’d been dark. Now, the light in the bathroom only acted like a spotlight. He was definitely better than my imagination. I hadn’t pictured this, and I’d even seen him without a shirt before. He was long and thick and so damn hard I ached. I wanted that inside me.
“Keep staring like that and I’m going to think you want to taste it again.”
“I do.” Having him at my mercy, with nothing but my hands and mouth, was a powerful feeling.
“Nah, Lily. It’s my turn.” He prowled toward me and stepped into the tub.
I looked up at him. The water was hitting against my back, and droplets were getting tossed around. Many landed on him.
“Hey,” he said, like I’d just answered the front door to him.
“Hey. You made it.”
“The roads were shit. I had to take a longer route. Sorry I missed your messages.”
My hands twitched. He was too close, and we were both naked. I had to touch him. I flattened my palms on his chest. “You shouldn’t have risked it.”
He ran a thumb along my lower lip. “It was worth it.” He lowered his head and his mouth was on mine. I opened automatically for him, and when he thrust his warm tongue inside, I groaned.
He gripped my upper arms and carefully turned me until my back was against the far wall. The shower curtain closed us in. This was our own private cove. When he broke the kiss, he reached behind him and flipped the water off. Without the noise, I could hear my needy breaths.
His focus turned back to me. Normally, I’d want to shrink, to hide, but the desire in his eyes went straight to my head. A flush spread down my body.
He traced the path of a water droplet with a finger. “This time, I’m going to find out for myself how wet you are.”
Every night he called, he asked me. And every night, I answered. But he was here. In the bare flesh.
He kissed me again, but he didn’t linger. He worked his way down my neck. Down to my pebbled nipples. The cadence of his kisses matched the thrum between my legs. He continued down, lowering himself to his knees.
My breathing was unsteady. Self-consciousness was setting in. Had I shaved well enough? Were my stretch marks a complete turnoff? Would he lose interest?
But he gripped the insides of my thighs and gently eased my legs wider.
“You’re fucking glistening.” His hot breath wafted over my damp skin. A shiver racked me, but I wasn’t cold. “So damn wet.”
He placed a kiss on the inside of one thigh. I was ready for him to dive in. We didn’t waste a lot of time on the phone. Once we were done catching up about our day, we got to business.
He placed a kiss on the other thigh.
“Eliot,” I groaned. I would start trembling and lose my footing. My arousal, my anticipation—I wasn’t going to survive it.
“I’ll give you what you need.” He ran a finger down my pussy, delving into my seam.
My knees turned rubbery, but I fought to stay in place. I would not ruin this moment by falling on my ass. I needed to be steadied, so I fisted my hands into the damp strands of his hair.
He held my gaze and pushed his finger inside. My legs trembled, and he scooted closer until I had to lift a leg to drape on his big shoulder.
He slowly pumped in and out of me. He brushed my clit with his thumb, and I vibrated with nothing but sheer electricity. Energy coursed through my veins, looking for an outlet, needing an explosion to release it soon.
“So fucking responsive,” he murmured against the skin of my belly.
I thought I came fast when his voice was in my ear, but when it was him touching me? I was skyrocketing toward my peak.
He removed his thumb and I almost whimpered—until he licked me.
“Oh god.” The intensity was staggering. I couldn’t move, or I’d fall down or fall on him, but I didn’t want to move in case I messed up his rhythm. Yet I was afraid to hold still. The onslaught of pleasure was more than I’d ever experienced.
This man on his knees in front of me made me feel things I hadn’t thought were possible. He was my own personal fantasy.
“Eliot?”
He answered with a grunt and continued attacking my clit, pumping his finger in and out of me.
There was no more holding back. I rammed into my climax. Stars detonated behind my eyes.
“Eliot!” His name echoed off the walls. I rode his hand and his face and I cried his name some more. I’d never come so hard or for so long in my life.
When I finally started coming down from the peak, he was there, licking and kissing his way up my body.
“Goddamn, Lily. That was so fucking worth the wait.” He nibbled up my neck.
I was limp but somehow still standing. He anchored me with one hand while he shoved the shower curtain aside and stretched to the sink to grab a condom.
He brought the packet to his mouth to rip open. My body was coming alive, anticipating having that glorious cock of his inside me.
A baby’s cry rent through the air.
Eliot
An hour had passed. Kellan was still fussing. After I got dried off and dressed and rerouted enough blood to my brain to function properly, I had popped into his room. He’d gotten big since I’d last seen him.
A sense of loss tugged at my chest. It’d only been six weeks, but his dark hair was filling in, and he had two more teeth poking out. I’d gotten a sleepy grin and a coo.
Lily had looked regretful, but I gave her a kiss on the head.
Now I was stretched out on top of the bed. Lily had gotten new blue bedding, changed out the blinds, and moved the snake tank to the living room. When I walked in, I could smell her sunshine scent instead of old perfume. I had wanted to be buried deep inside of her for the third time by now, but I’d rather be under the same roof than separate.
Fatigue dragged at my eyelids. If I had been responsible, I wouldn’t have driven. Many of the county highways on this side of the state were all marked “no travel advised” on the online road map, and only more had been added after the sun went down. But there were enough that were still labeled as just “icy.” Still not a good idea, but at least I could see the road. It was enough to get me to Lily.
I was dozing off when the door creaked open. The light wasn’t on, but the steps weren’t right for Lily. I cracked an eye open. A short shadow was making its way to Lily’s side of the bed.
“Mommy?” she whispered.
“No, boss lady, it’s me.”
“Eliot!” she said in a delighted whisper. “You’re here.” Then she groaned. “My tummy hurts.”
Oh shit. Did she need a puke bucket? Water? I’d taken care of Lily, but I didn’t have much experience with sick kids.
Lily stepped into the room. “I think he’s finally— Cali?”
“Mommy, my tummy hurts.”
“Oh no.” Lily put her hands on her hips. She wore a T-shirt and shorts like me. She’d taken the towel off her hair, and it hung around her neck.
“Too much candy?” Lily asked.
“No?”
I grinned at Cali’s lack of confidence.
“Can I sleep with you?” Cali’s voice was small.
I couldn’t see Lily’s exact expression, but her dismay radiated across the room. It matched my own, but there was nothing that could be done. The kids came first.
I rolled up. “I’ll take the couch.”
Cali was already scrambling onto the bed.
“Thank you,” Lily said quietly.
I put a hand around her waist and tipped my head down. “Don’t mention it. Get some rest.” I placed a kiss on her hair, not sure what Cali could see or what Lily would want her to see.
I gently closed the door and went to the living room. The snake tank was dark, and the cat was in her tower bed. “Looks like it’s you and me, guys.”
Once I was sprawled on the couch with the two throw blankets across me, I stared at the ceiling. I was tired, but sleep was evading me. I’d seen the sexy red bra and underwear when I’d changed while she was getting Kellan. I’d never been cockblocked so much in my life. I would laugh if it wouldn’t disturb everyone.
Was this what my brothers and Aggie went through now that they all had families? I gave Cody shit when he’d wanted Tova when she was his nanny, but seriously—how did he and Tova manage to hook up at all with kids around?
I didn’t know how many minutes ticked by, but I was finally starting to doze when I heard muffled footsteps.
I opened my eyes to the outline of Lily in the hallway night-light.
She came straight toward me and tossed a packet on my chest. “She’s asleep, but we should hurry.”
My cock instantly woke the fuck up. I fumbled with the condom. “Are you sure?”
“No, but I’ll leave my underwear on, and I’ll keep the blanket over me.”
I…had never been this turned on. She’d snuck away for me. Her trip out of the bedroom was almost as treacherous as the drive on icy roads.
I yanked my shorts down far enough to free my erection. I tossed the wrapper on the floor and rolled the damn thing on. Lily’s shorts were on the floor, and she was already crawling over me.
Finally, she straddled me. Blood pounded in my dick, and I was so close to heaven I couldn’t see straight. I wanted to have sex with this woman, but some things were paramount.
“Not so fast,” I said quietly. I slid my hand between her legs, pushing her underwear to the side. This didn’t feel like the fancy red ones, but I couldn’t give a fuck. As long as she let me get under them.
She was wet, but I wanted her good and soaked. “Christ, Lily. You’re as soft as satin and always so fucking wet for me.”
She groaned and rocked on my hand. The blanket was wrapped around her waist and she leaned over me. I toyed with her clit and pushed two fingers inside. She bowed her back and tilted her face up. The moan was pure reward.
I could get her off again, but we were risking interruption. I gripped her hips. She kept her underwear pulled to the side, and I notched myself at her hot entrance. She took over from there, sinking onto me.
“Jesus,” I hissed. “So fucking good.”
“So big,” she whispered and lifted herself an inch and then lowered herself again.
She did that until I was seated fully inside. We both held still. Need pounded at my brain, demanding I thrust, thrust, thrust. I just needed a moment to savor this, to feel the full connection between us. Yes, we were sneaking in a quickie, but she wasn’t just a quickie.
This woman was… Only mine for a year.
And then?
She moved, and my thoughts gladly derailed, giving way to the ecstasy coursing between us.
“I can’t believe I can come again.” Her words were almost lost in the quiet living room.
I held her hips, slowing her pace, or I’d blow before she did. “If we had time, I’d make you climax three times.”
She popped her head up and the disbelief was apparent in the dark.
To prove my point, I put a thumb back on her clit. The shudder that racked her body went straight through my cock. She pressed her hands into my chest and rode me and my thumb.
I wasn’t going to last. I didn’t need her in a spotlight to see the way her lips were parted as she panted or how her eyes were closed. She was so fucking beautiful. This woman was mine.
Her walls convulsed around me, and she buried her face in my shoulder. When she went taut and silently screamed her release into my shirt, I finally let go. My climax shattered behind my eyes. I clenched my teeth and tried like hell to smother any noise that came out.
Fuck. We bucked together until we both went still.
“That was…damn, Lily.”
Her giggle was soft. She lifted her head. “Yeah. It was.” She placed a kiss on my lips, paused for a moment, and then straightened. “I should clean up and get back in case she wakes again.”
I wished I could cuddle her to me, curl around her, and fall asleep to the sound of her breathing. I slid a lock of her hair through my fingers. There’d be time for that later. I’d make sure of it. “I know. I’d like you to stay, but she’s got dibs on you.”
She gave me a curious look. “You don’t mind cuddling?”
“Why would I? I get you in my arms.”
She dropped her forehead to my chest. “You’re so perfect.”
“Far from it.”
“Trust me. You are.” She wiggled off me, and just like that, I was ready to go again. She lifted the blanket higher. “Seriously? Again?”
“Don’t underestimate how much I want you.”
“You say things like that and you like to cuddle? You make it hard to be a good mom and snuggle with a little girl who has sugar belly.” She leaned down to kiss me again, then I watched her ass wiggle all the way to the bedroom.
It was going to take me another hour to get to sleep.