Chapter 26
Chapter Twenty-six
JESSE
He sat very silent, very still. There was a squirrel scrabbling in the branches somewhere above him, a blue jay flashed in and out of his peripheral vision, but nothing else moved. Jesse couldn’t move. If he did, he thought he’d break.
No one would find him here, not unless they were looking for him.
He couldn’t quite remember getting here, just that, once he was among the trees, away from Matt and his questions that sliced to the bone, he’d been safe enough to let go of the control he had over himself. He’d spilled down into a messy heap.
And there he stayed, looking up at the cloudless blue between the aspens, and trying not to think. His chest was tight with old, remembered grief, though he didn’t know what for.
But he couldn’t let it take over. Grieving changed nothing. So he gradually organized himself, settling himself more comfortably against the lichen-covered bark of the tree behind him, and carried on very deliberately not thinking.
He’d heard the brass bell ring shortly after he’d gotten here, but it hadn’t been a wild clanging of the sort to indicate an emergency. It was too early for dinner, so he guessed that Matt wanted to call a pack meeting.
And he could carry on sitting here, ignoring it, because he wasn’t pack.
That was the way he wanted it. Couldn’t imagine anything worse than being at the beck and call of someone who just had to ring a bell to get him to show up.
But as he sat there, the day slowly losing its heat as the sun dipped, he couldn’t stop his thoughts circling around the meeting.
About what they might be talking about. And the fact Matt had expected to meet Cale today.
Jesse hadn’t even asked how that had gone.
Hadn’t had the chance to ask before the whole Argent thing blew open.
Matt acted like Jesse being an Argent was the biggest thing ever, but Jesse still didn’t see the big deal about having a fancy-colored coat. Maybe, if they were all supposed to have died out years ago, it was like seeing a ghost.
Curious now, he stripped off and shifted. Looking critically at the parts of himself he could see, he reckoned he just looked pale. Nothing special there. And then he growled in irritation as he realized he was in the shade.
Once he’d woven his way through the trees to a patch of sunlight, he looked again. Maybe there was a bit more of a sheen than simply having a glossy coat would give him. Maybe. But he thought he might be seeing it because he was looking for it.
Wolf vision was different from human vision—it had been a hell of a shock at first, the way he couldn’t see colors the same way.
Maybe wolves’ eyes didn’t see the shimmer Matt had said Argents had.
And it wasn’t like Jesse had ever shifted anywhere there were mirrors or had even seen another wolf, not until that night in the mountains.
How the hell was he supposed to know he was different?
Exasperation felt a hell of a lot better than the misery from earlier, so Jesse rode that surge of annoyance as he headed back toward his clothes. He shifted and yanked them on. He wanted to know how Matt’s meeting had gone. Had Cale shown up? Had he told Matt what he wanted?
Matt was convinced they were after Jesse because he’d seen something he shouldn’t have. But it didn’t add up. Not enough to explain all of this.
MATT
He’d withdrawn to his den after the pack meeting, needing to ensure everything was in order.
His Will was locked in the filing cabinet, and Bryce knew where the key was.
He’d known for years, part of the quiet trust between them, but when Matt reminded him tonight, Bryce had gone very still.
He’d said nothing, but his eyes had been stricken.
If tonight went badly, Bryce would be the one to pick up the pieces.
If there were any pieces left to pick up.
He breathed out very carefully, slowly, calming himself.
He hadn’t asked for this. Hadn’t brought it on his pack, unlike Cheyenne.
All he could do was try to stop it before it tore them apart.
Out of nowhere, he found himself wondering, what if he hadn’t gotten Jesse to stay? What if he hadn’t been selfish and wanted? If he’d let Jesse go, then Cale would be on Jesse’s tail miles away, instead of here, threatening his pack.
But if Matt had sent a clueless wolf out there, to be hunted down by Cale’s pack, he wouldn’t be any alpha worthy of the name. This wasn’t his fault.
He kept repeating that as he ensured the important documents, like house deeds and car ownership, were where they could be easily found if needed.
A tap on the door caused him to look up as Jesse edged his way into the room. He didn’t look precisely happy, but the earlier hollowness in his eyes had gone.
“You sure I’m an Argent?” he blurted. “I checked, but I don’t see it. Tristan didn’t see it. You think maybe you made a mistake?”
Hope was in his eyes, along with a certain resignation, as if he knew he couldn’t be that lucky. Closing the drawer, Matt rounded the desk to sit in his chair. Jesse accepted the unspoken invitation and curled up in the other one. Not quite as loose and easy as usual, though.
“If you want, I’ll film you so you can see yourself through human eyes,” Matt said.
“As for Tristan—all he saw, apparently, was a wolf intent on tackling him into the dirt.” His lips twitched, very slightly.
“I think we may need to revisit the shifter history and culture side of his education, though on the other hand, I’m all for survival instincts winning out. ”
Jesse frowned, like he wanted to argue. “I can’t be one,” he protested. “It don’t make no sense.”
Matt sat quietly, letting him process it in his own time.
Eventually, Jesse let out a big sigh, looking ruefully at Matt. Like he was squaring what he knew of Matt and his truthfulness against something that seemed like nonsense. “Guess maybe I am, then,” he muttered. “But what’s the big deal? I don’t get it.”
Matt had one eye on the time. It was dusk, and once darkness fell, Cale would come. But this was so important. Jesse needed to understand so he could safeguard himself in future.
“You remember that conversation we had about shifter politics? Shifters tend to be damn superstitious at the best of times, and those who still remember the Argents venerate them. Hearing that one’s come back to them now…
” Matt paused briefly, trying to figure out how best to say it without making Jesse feel like a symbol rather than a living, breathing shifter.
“Some of them are going to think you’ve appeared now for a reason.
Which means, anyone out there with an agenda simply needs to present you as a member of their pack, and half the shifters out there are going to be falling over themselves to agree with anything you say. ”
Jesse’s lip curled. “Just cause I’ve got a fancy coat?”
“Because you’ve got a lineage that goes back to the dawn of time,” Matt told him.
“Argents used to be our rulers. Having control of an Argent means money, power, and influence. You don’t have to believe me, Jesse, but the people who want power?
They’re not going to care if you buy into it or not. They’ll just use you.”
“This is bullshit, Matt,” Jesse shot back. “No way in hell anyone’s gonna believe I’m special.”
Matt flicked his tongue out to moisten his lips, noting the way that, even in his indignation, Jesse tracked his movement.
“You’re plenty special, though the color of your coat has nothing to do with that.
But honestly, Jesse—Argents mean something to shifters.
It’s not like, say, a dodo was discovered, living their best life somewhere.
It’s more like… ” He cracked a laugh, suddenly.
“Can’t believe I’m going to say this, but more like King Arthur’s come back and is about to pull Excalibur out of a stone. ”
“Yeah, you lost me on that one,” Jesse said. “But is that Argent bullshit why Cale—did he say that? That he wants me?”
A muscle clenched in Matt’s cheek at the reminder of Cale. Of their conversation, when it had become so clear neither was willing to give ground to the other.
“As good as,” he said.
For the briefest instant, there was a flare of panic in Jesse’s eyes, but then it was gone, replaced by trust as he looked at Matt. He knew Matt would never hand him over.
“I don’t know if he wants you for himself, or wants to sell you to the highest bidder. But it’s you he wants.”
“Yeah, but all I need to do is say I don’t agree with whatever it is they’re sellin’”—
“Think about it, Jesse. Having an Argent back among us is so mind-blowing that you’re not going to need to say a word.
No one’s going to risk disagreeing with what they’re told you want.
And you’re probably way too important to talk to anyone directly.
All they need is your presence in photos or video.
” He lifted his hand to stop Jesse’s protest. “They can make it so you can’t speak to anyone. Or they can drug you.”
He raked his hand through his hair, scrubbing at his scalp as he thought about Jesse trapped in a life like that. He couldn’t bear it. “The only safety is keeping your existence secret, staying away from them all.”
Jesse was staring at him, mouth open, but no words came. His fingers curled, as if he wanted to grab onto something, but he forced them down into his lap.
Matt couldn’t tell what was going on in his head, but he could still see the moment he made a decision. Something raw flickered over his face, and he drew his shoulders tight, as if trying to hold himself together.
Then Jesse locked it all down. That was what Matt hated the most, the way Jesse seemed to have spent his whole life shutting himself off, like pain wasn’t worth acknowledging, like softer emotions were an inconvenience.
Or worse—a weakness. Matt could feel him slipping away, and there wasn’t a damn thing he could do about it.
“You’re right,” Jesse said roughly, his voice wrecked. “I need to disappear. Go somewhere no one knows me. Never shift again.”
He pushed to his feet, the movement abrupt, ragged, and Matt surged up out of his chair almost without thinking.
“What the hell, Jesse? You’re going nowhere.”
JESSE
Jesse wanted, so badly, to stay. To tell himself he’d had no choice but to obey an alpha’s order.
But he could see it now with painful clarity—he, and no one else, had brought this deadly threat down on Matt’s pack.
On Matt, because he might just have been doing a bit more reading about shifters while staying here, and he’d read about clashes between packs, how they were so often a fight between alphas. To the death.
He couldn’t be responsible for this.
“You forget, Matt—I’ve seen him,” he said. “He’s dangerous, and that pack of his don’t mess around. I’m not putting you all at risk like that.”
“If someone attacks one of my pack, they attack all of us.” Matt unclenched his jaw just enough to growl out the words.
And Jesse snapped. For fuck’s sake, couldn’t Matt see? “I ain’t a part of your damn pack.”
He flung the words like missiles, watched them land, and the devastation that followed.
Matt was frozen in place. He was pale, his eyes dark and shocked. Like Jesse had taken an ax to the root of him.
Jesse had expected a snarl, some alpha command to tell him he was part of Matt’s pack, damnit.
Not this stunned, hollow silence. Jesse’s breath stuttered.
He had to leave before he changed his mind.
No way was he going to be the cause of Matt getting hurt.
Nor the rest of them, because Tristan and Jason and Dave weren’t anywhere near a match for the fight-hardened wolves he’d encountered.
“I ain’t doing it, Matt.” He made it sound like defiance, because otherwise, he’d shatter. “You ain’t putting that on me. I’m leaving, and that’s final.”
Matt twitched slightly, as if he wanted to reach for Jesse to stop him. But he didn’t.
Jesse turned and forced himself to walk out, his chest tight with grief.