Chapter 42
forty-two
Jeremy
You okay?”
I look up to see Joey staring down at me.
“Yeah, I’m fine.”
“I’ve been talking to you for the past fifteen minutes, and I don’t think you’ve heard a word I’ve said.”
“Yeah, I did.”
Joey crosses her arms, “Okay, so then what do you think?”
“Oh, um, I think it’s a great idea.”
“Great, so we’ll expect Tristyn and Henry for dinner tonight.”
“What?”
I haven’t talked about Tristyn and Henry too much to my family, but enough for them to know what they mean to me. I don’t know if we’re at that place, though, for Tristyn to meet my family. Not because I don’t want her to, but because I think it will stress her out.
And I don’t blame her. My family can be a lot, but it’s only because they care.
“That’s what I thought. You didn’t hear a word.”
“Sorry, I’ve had a lot on my mind.” I run my hands over my legs.
“Like what?”
I don’t want to worry her. I haven’t wanted to worry anyone over the last couple of weeks, but the pain is getting worse. I tried taking my pain pills again, and they didn’t do anything for me… so I stopped.
“The future.”
“Oh yeah? Your future with Tristyn or—”
“My future without hockey.” I run my tongue along my lower lip. “I’ve come to terms with not being able to play anymore, but I don’t know what’s next for me.”
“You went to college for a reason, Jere.”
“Yeah, and I thought I had at least fifteen years before I needed to figure out what to use my degree for.” I chuckle. “And now I have one more year of college, and I need to figure out my next steps.”
“You’ve got a whole group of people who care about you and will do whatever we can to help you figure it out.”
“Thanks, Jo, I appreciate it. I just think I need some more time to be alone with my thoughts.”
“Okay.” She stands up, dropping a hand on my shoulder. “If you need me, I’ll be inside, okay?”
“Okay.”
I grab my coffee cup and take a sip, watching the sun peak out over the trees. The guys and I had so many days and nights spent in this backyard, talking about life and our future. I never in a million years imagined we’d be heading down such different paths.
In a year, we’ll all be in our own worlds. Playing hockey for different professional teams, working any job that we can find, starting families, or settling down. We won’t live together anymore. We won’t see each other every day anymore.
I don’t want to think about what life will be like then, after so much of our time being spent together.
I know we will be a part of each other’s lives for the rest of our lives, but starting next year, it’ll look different from what it does now.
I don’t know if I’m ready for that.
Ican’t feel my legs.
I knew it was too good to be true. I was walking, and things were starting to get back to normal, but I should’ve known it wouldn’t last.
I should’ve known that I’d wake up one day and reality would hit.
“Jere?” Tristyn rolls over in bed and rests a hand on my stomach. “Are you okay? It’s three in the morning.”
“I can’t feel my legs.” I stare at my feet, and I’m sure I’m moving them, but they aren’t budging.
“What?” She flies up in bed. “What do you mean you can’t feel your legs?”
“I can’t feel my legs,” I repeat. “I woke up in a lot of pain, and I tried to get out of bed, I tried to go take another pain pill, but I co-couldn’t move.”
My hands begin to shake, and my eyes well up with tears.
Tristyn gets out of bed, grabs her phone off the nightstand, and holds it between her shoulder and ear as she grabs some sweatpants from her closet and pulls them on.
“Hey, sorry to wake you.” Her voice disappears into the bathroom as I stare at my feet. This odd sense of Déjà vu runs over me.
Tristyn comes back into the room completely dressed.
“Vince is on his way.”
“Vince?” My eyes stay glued to my feet.
“We’re taking you to the hospital.”
“We are?”
“I’m not going to have you lie in this bed in pain, Jere. Especially, if getting you to the hospital in a timely fashion could change the outcome of what’s going on.”
“But Henry—”
“That’s why Vince is coming over. He’ll be here soon. We will get you down to the car, and I’ll bring you to the hospital.”
I give her a small nod, just enough to let her know I understand, but my eyes never leave my feet.
If something moves, I’m going to see it. It happened once… it can happen again.
Jeremy, did you hear what I said?”
“Yeah.”
“So, what does that mean? His paralysis was temporary because of the pain he’s in?”
“Not entirely.” Dr. Franklin points out various findings on my scans and explains what’s going on to Tristyn.
I’ve heard these things a million times, though, I don’t need to hear them again.
“What’s next?”
“Unfortunately, Jeremy, you’re going to have to undergo another surgery. Sooner, rather than later. The end of the month or early October.”
“And that’ll fix this?”
“There are no promises.” I don’t look at Tristyn; I look at the scans plastered on the wall.
“We’re hopeful that this second surgery will help relieve the nerve compression happening and that we can create more stability in his spine, so we won’t have to open him up again.”
“And what about walking? When he woke up, he couldn’t move his legs, but since we got here, he’s gotten feeling back, he’s moving his legs, he even stood up.”
“Jeremy’s back was extremely inflamed, which led to his temporary paralysis. Most likely due to nerve damage in his back. Honestly, we should be thankful it happened now because we can monitor it and treat it the best we can until his surgery.”
“Do I need to be back in the chair?” I finally look up at Dr. Franklin.
“Not entirely. I would rely on it a little more than you have been. The less stress we put on your back until your surgery, the better.”
“And after the surgery?”
“You’ll be back in a brace full-time for at least six weeks. You’ll need to be back on your crutches at the very least, but might want to rely on your wheelchair for the first few weeks.”
“Are we done here?”
“Jere.”
“Sorry, I just want to get home. Get to bed.”
“I’ll have a nurse come in with your discharge paperwork. And before you leave, let’s schedule your surgery.”
“Got it.” I sigh as the door shuts behind Dr. Franklin.
Here we go again.