Chapter 9
Amy: A Kind Of Magic
So, tonight’s the big night. I’m almost hyper-ventilating, I’m so nervous and so excited.
I can’t believe I’m actually doing this.
If someone had said to me a year ago that I’d be going to a séance, never mind organising one, I’d have thought they were completely mad.
Now maybe I’m the one who’s completely mad.
But I really don’t care. All that matters is that I try to reach James.
I have to believe he’s out there somewhere, in which case I can’t let him forget about me.
I love him too much. I need him too much.
Janice has been so generous with her time. We’ve spent a couple of hours already today on preparing the room. It looks, and smells, really magical. We’re using her dining room, and we’ve covered the beautiful oval mahogany table with a dark green cloth.
We read that it’s good to remove all electrical items from the room, so we’ve taken out the table lamps, the phone, and Janice’s record player – a really old restored one in a wooden case, a bit grander than the modern retro one James and I bought when vinyl came back into fashion.
I do love ours though. I love the thing of putting the needle on the record, and doing it really smoothly so it doesn’t jump.
There’s something very satisfying about playing vinyl, and I like having a real record, not just something virtual in the cloud, and you get the added bonus of some sleeves having fabulous artwork.
Apparently, the number of candles should be divisible by three, like the number of people.
Maybe because it’s meant to be the ‘magic number’?
Whatever, we’re sticking to it. I’ve just lit them all, so now the room is filled with the wonderful fragrance of vanilla, bergamot and patchouli.
I ordered them from a specialist psychic retailer online.
The cynic in me thought if they were truly psychic they’d have sent me the candles in advance and then asked me to pay, as they’d have already known what I wanted.
In fact, they might even have been able to divine my credit card details.
I also bought some crystals which are meant to help us to connect with the higher realms. Black Tourmaline, which is supposed to offer protection from negative spirits; Selenite, which is white and removes psychic blockages; and Angelite, which is pale blue and, you guessed it, helps communicate with angels.
I know it all sounds a bit fanciful, but I’m really starting to get into all of this.
Desperation leads you into strange places!
We have some incense ready too. I’m not a huge fan of incense, I find the smell a little overpowering, but Janice seems to think it’s the done thing at a séance, so we’re going to burn a little, just for a short while.
I’m just hoping it won’t put James off – I know he doesn’t like the smell of it either.
A cousin of his used to use it, and when we’d go to visit her, he’d always come away from her house quite miffed that his clothes were reeking of the stuff.
The divisible by three thing was nearly a huge problem, as Frank had to cancel at the last minute – his daughter’s been very ill recently, so he really needed to go and help out with his grandchildren.
Just as I was wondering exactly how much bad luck it was going to bring to have the wrong number of people, I got a phone call from my best friend Elle.
Elle and I go back years, to school days in fact.
We both boarded at a posh school in Bristol for a while.
I didn’t want to go, but I didn’t have much choice because my mum was going to be away for months on end launching some boy band in the US.
And actually it turned out for the best because I met Elle, and she and I were like two peas in a pod – we even got nicknamed the twins, and we were so close we might as well have been.
Most of my friends haven’t known how to handle the whole grieving thing.
It makes them uncomfortable, and I get that.
I might have been just the same if this had happened to one of them, instead of to me.
It’s just I can’t conveniently set the grief aside, so we’ve kind of drifted apart a bit.
Elle and another friend, Becky, are the only ones who’ve been able to cope with it.
Sadly, Becky’s an expert in grief, she’s had her own loss to deal with, so she completely gets it.
Elle hasn’t had a bereavement yet, but somehow she knows how to let me be me, so thankfully we’ve stayed close.
I hadn’t told Elle about the séance because she’s had enough on her plate recently, and I didn’t want to worry her.
She’s been going through a bit of a rough patch with her boyfriend, but she’s been trying to avoid leaning on me like she would have done before.
I think it’s because she was feeling that at least her boyfriend hadn’t died.
But you can’t think like that really. You can’t try to be grateful to have just any boyfriend, however bad, simply because your friend’s boyfriend is dead.
So, to cut a long story short, she’s now on her own again, and wanted to know if I was free to go out for a drink tonight.
I wasn’t prepared with any kind of excuse, so I ended up telling her what’s happening.
‘Well, actually we, the FFC, we’re having a séance tonight – at Janice’s house.’
No sound from the other end of the line. Elle may have quietly fallen off her chair in shock. I feel like I need to speak again, to fill the silence.
‘I need to contact James. And this is my best chance. We’ve done loads of prep so I’m really hopeful it will work, that we’ll get through to him.’
Still no response.
‘Do you fancy coming along?’ I add on the spur of the moment. As soon as I’ve said it, my first thought is, ‘Oh no, did I really just invite my super-logical friend to a séance?’ I wait for the reaction, questioning my sanity.
‘Okay. Why not? What time?’ was not on my list of predicted responses. I can hardly believe my ears.
‘Really? Are you sure, Elle?’
‘Yeah, why not? It’ll be cool. I feel like I know most of that crowd pretty well anyway.’
It’s true, Elle does know a lot of people at the crem.
Elle’s a florist, you see, so she’s often there delivering wreaths.
She’s by far the best in the area. She has the cutest little shop in Chipping Wotton.
A tiny place overflowing with flowers at the end of a cobbled alley, but that doesn’t stop it from being the busiest florist I’ve ever known.
Everyone in the FFC is sure to have bought flowers from her shop at some time.
So, by some miracle, Elle is coming and we’re back on track for the numbers.
It took her a while, but Janice managed to track down the lady who had been the medium for the séance sessions she went to years ago when she wanted to contact George.
The medium’s called Elsie, and she seems very nice.
The only downside is she really is getting on a bit, and I’m guessing her hearing was quite a lot better when she was younger.
I just hope that any spirits that come through are not softly spoken.
It shouldn’t be a problem for James. His voice could carry plenty when he was shouting orders at work.
So, now there’s a knock at the door. Janice is busy in the kitchen preparing a little buffet supper for after the séance.
‘Shall I get that?’ I call to her from the hall.
‘Oh, yes please, sweetie.’
It’s Laurence. Punctual as ever.
‘Evening, Amy,’ he greets me.
I give him a hug. ‘Thanks so much for coming, Laurence.’
‘Wouldn’t have missed it for the world,’ he says, smiling gently.
It’s a relief to see him. I know this is definitely not his thing, but he’s so kind and caring, and I know he’d do anything to help me.
All these people are wonderful, and normally I wouldn’t have any trouble trusting them to do something they’ve promised.
But it wouldn’t have been a huge surprise if a few people felt at the last minute that they couldn’t face it.
Anyway, there are more knocks at the door and the seats start to fill up – Tom’s here and Joe and Olive have just arrived.
Elle got here a few minutes ago, all bubbly and enthusiastic about the evening.
She’s such a fab friend. The spirit board is on the table.
The design on it looks like a cross between a flower and a kind of 1970s geometrical pattern, and then there are the letters of the alphabet around the sides.
We’re just waiting for a few more people and then we can get started.
And now I’m starting to feel a little bit nauseous.
What if he doesn’t come through? No, I mustn’t think like that.
I need to stay positive. Just please, please, please come through, James.