51. Notice Me
~ VOSKI ~
When I reached the stables back home, hoping for a ride to the solitude, Kham was there—but so was Koa. And while most of the Keep still slept, they were flirting.
My heart sank as the simmering desire in my chest rose slowly during the walk, and burst into flames just before I made it up the aisle to Kham’s stable.
When I appeared, Kham stood in her doorway, crooning and weaving, attempting to entice her out. And I could feel that she wanted him, but she teased and… shit.
Clawing a hand through my hair, I picked up my pace, hoping the movement would help settle the demand in my body.
‘Demand for your mate is a gift, Voski. Don’t fight it,’ Kham sent, trumpeting at me, despite the early hour.
I shushed him. ‘Most everyone is still asleep.’
‘We don’t wish to sleep.’
‘I can see that,’ I sent dryly. ‘I think you should take this outside.’
Kham backed further into the aisle so his shoulders no longer filled Koa’s door. Her head appeared a moment later and she peered down at me.
She was massive. Almost as big as Kham, which was very large for a female.
‘Do you need a ride? Koa could join us. We can rest in the clearing.’
Where their mating would be audible as well as close enough to sense in detail? No, thank you.
‘That’s not necessary, Kham. Thank you. I’ll gather my things and I’ll walk.’
‘Are you certain?’
‘I am. Very certain.’
He huffed, snorting at me. I entered his stable where I’d left my things, urging him to take the day—as much as Koa was able—and to leave me to myself.
‘Solitude and rest are good for us when they replenish, Voski. But when you use them to avoid—’
‘I’m trying to be considerate to you and your needs, Kham,’ I sent, my jaw clenched because I really didn’t want to be close to them when they started mating again.
Kham rumbled, and though he didn’t follow me into the stable fully, stood in the doorway, extending his neck.
‘We’re in this together.’
I sighed and turned to face him, scratching his nose and nodding. ‘I know. I’m grateful for you, Kham. You know that.’
‘Yet it isn’t only me. Your brothers and sisters—’
‘I know.’
‘—returning to them will bring you joy.
I snorted. I didn’t know about that. But I also knew my dragon would stay here and talk to me as long as he worried I was avoiding anything.
‘I am returning, Kham. Tomorrow evening. Today and tonight I’ll rest, like you said. Tomorrow I’ll return, and my patrols will begin again. We’ll be back to our normal routine. You’ll see.’
I felt the stab of skepticism in him, but let go of his head and turned to put the last of the things I’d gathered in my satchel.
I didn’t like to deceive Kham—and I wasn’t. Not really. I would return tomorrow night. I would be going back to my normal routine with my brothers and sisters.
I just didn’t want to.
‘Voski—’ The caution in my dragon’s tone made my heart tighten. But Koa whistled, and Kham whirled.
‘Go, Kham,’ I urged him as he crooned at his mate, and she danced for him. ‘Pick me up before dinner tomorrow.’
‘I will reach for you—you can tell me if you need me.’
I made myself smile and looked at him out the door. ‘Watching you love your mate is the last thing I need,’ I said dryly. Kham huffed, but Koa squealed and trotted down the aisle toward the doors outside, and to my great relief, he slipped out after her.
I took a seat on the cot I had napped on earlier in the night and took a deep breath.
I was exhausted. Drained. Uneasy. Angry. And very, very glad that my dragon was distracted.
For a moment it was tempting just to lie down and sleep, even knowing things would grow busy in the stable as soon as the sun was fully up. But I shook my head.
I needed the quiet and peace of the clearing, even if it wasn’t quite so restful, knowing Grace could find me out there if she chose to.
Shit.
I rubbed my face and sighed. I needed to wake up, think clearly, and make a plan.
I would bathe quickly—a battle wash, rather than a true bath—because the water of the stream was growing very chilly. Then I’d walk the hour to the solitude. It would do me good to move and breathe the fresh air.
Sending a rush of gratitude and reassurance to Kham through the bond so he wouldn’t be tempted to worry and come find me—with Koa, and possibly Grace in tow—I picked up the pitcher I kept in Kham’s stable for the days I didn’t have time to wash properly.
I could have run back to the barracks and washed in warm water, but then I’d be forced to talk to people.
Instead, I filled it in one of the buckets that had been drawn by the stableboys earlier.
It wouldn’t be as cold as the water outside.
Then returned to the little stand and bowl in the corner of Kham’s stable where I left my things.
As I’d done a thousand times, I stripped down and used the pitcher and a cloth to wet and scrub my face and body, letting the dirty water drain down into the stable waste gutter.
The heat in my chest rose—Kham and Koa chasing each other and drawing further away, but their desire rising as they did so. I kept Kham as closed off as possible, and prayed they wouldn’t spend the whole day in each other’s thrall.
The cold water was a good choice for cooling my body’s ardor as the dragons sought each other.
I gritted my teeth, muttering curses and insults about Kham that would have made him laugh if he’d been there, but felt good to vent my frustrations.
I had a good book back at the treehouse.
I’d take the food I gathered. Koa would end up training with Grace most of today—I hoped.
Once the dragons were past this, I could rest.
Breathing deep and slow in an attempt to slow my hammering heart, I picked up the towel I used for travel and dried my body, then tied it around my waist. I was half-hard, and if any of my brothers showed up looking for me, I didn’t want to have to answer questions.
I turned to find my clean leathers, and a shadow moved in the corner of my vision.
There was a rush in my body, and my heart dipped. I knew what I would find before I turned: Grace. Standing in the doorway, her eyes so big I knew she must have been there long enough to have seen me bare-assed—probably more—and very ungracefully drying myself.
I flinched, but caught myself before the curses burst from me. I grasped the tie of the towel at my hip to make certain it wouldn’t fall and went still.
She stared at me, horrified, then her eyes widened and she turned, quickly, clapping hands to her mouth.
“Sorry! I’m so sorry—the dragons. I felt—”
“Yes, I know,” I said through my clenched teeth. Every word was a tightrope. Every breath wanted to rush out of me in a roar. “They were flirting when I arrived. I told Kham to take her out and get things done. He’ll make sure she’s back before you have any training. Don’t worry.”
Rage erupted in my chest, but I clamped down on it, remembering the humble pie I’d already had to eat in her presence yesterday. I didn’t want to do it again.
“Sorry,” Grace breathed once more, then turned on her heel, her cheeks pink.
“How do you do that?” The words burst out of me without thought and Grace froze, then turned slowly back to face me.
She stared up at me in the dark, her eyes wide like that, but burning. Her tongue darted out to wet her lips as her gaze dropped to my mouth—
She swallowed. “I was looking for Koa and—”
“No, I meant, how did you get there without me hearing you? I know I haven’t been kind about it, but it’s true that you have an enviable skill. Where did you come from?”
“I was up in my room,” she said uncertainly. “I couldn’t sleep once the dragons were teasing each other. I was being quiet because I didn’t want to wake anyone. Then I saw you…”
I inhaled slowly. If she was a brother, a normal Flameborne, I would have been thrilled by the potential in her.
I tried to put myself in that place—tried to be honest with myself about what I’d say to another man who’d been able to creep up on me, and throw knives, who flew with such joy and abandon and…
And she was miserable.
It hit me like a boulder rolling down a hill as her face fell when I didn’t respond immediately.
She started to leave again. “I won’t bother you again—”
“No, Grace. Don’t go. I was just thinking.”
She stopped turning, looking at me warily.
I cleared my throat. “You have a great deal of skill. More than most Flameborne when they first arrive. You should be proud of that. You startled me. That’s all.
” That was all? No one could sneak up on me, but she did so effortlessly!
But I swallowed the protests. She’d heard me snarl them before.
It was time to treat her like any other Flameborne.
“You have every right to be here, with your dragon, and in the Keep.” I knew I sounded stiff, so I tried to soften my tone.
“This is the place for you. I’m certain of it. ”
My guts twisted as her eyes began to shine, but she nodded and clasped her hands at her waist. Her posture looked strange in a jacket and trousers. Her stance suited a ball gown and gilded chandelier lighting. Yet, she stood in a dank stable, in poorly sized leathers, with a smudge on her forehead.
She blew out a breath, then said something in a hushed voice, but the very moment she started to speak, I got the prickle.
Every sense on alert, I stared past her to the aisle beyond.
My senses were never wrong.
Someone was coming. Coming for me. And she hadn’t realized.
Without thought, I strode forward, thankful that my bare feet kept the steps silent.
Grace babbled something, then squawked when I reached her and grasped her wrist, pulling her into the stable, putting myself between her and the door as I flattened myself against the wall, then turned slowly, inching out with one eye to scan the aisle…