27. Logan
Logan
Six whole days pass before Chase and I find ourselves at home without one of us needing to rush out the door. Unfortunately, time has done nothing to dull the throb in my cock from the eye-fucking Chase gave me in the stairwell.
It’s starting to get so bad, I swear I can smell him when I climb into bed.
I’ve finally made it to the end of my on-week, and Chase is enjoying his first day off in a long while.
I wake up around noon, trying not to completely sabotage my sleep schedule during my off-week while still wanting to wake up early enough to enjoy some normal hours of daylight.
When I turn the corner into the living room, Chase is on the couch with his laptop open, chewing on the end of a pen as I pass through the living room on my way to the kitchen.
“You know you’re supposed to do fun shit on your days off, right? Not work more,” I tell him.
He looks up at me, and I swear the light in his eyes damn near makes my knees buckle.
“Logan!” he says excitedly. “I was getting ready to come shake you awake.”
The last thing I need is Chase Matthews anywhere near my bed.
“That would not have ended well for you,” I deadpan, moving to the cabinet to grab a mug for the coffee mercifully still in the pot.
I hear Chase chuckle as his fingers brush over his keyboard.
“Oh, please. I weigh twice as much as you. If I went limp noodle on you, you’d be fucked.”
“If you went limp noodle on me, there’s a good chance I’d go stiff noodle on you, and then you’d be fucked,” I grumble, bringing the coffee mug to my lips.
Chase lets out a loud bark of laughter from the living room.
I’m glad to see he’s in a much better mood than he has been, but I approach him cautiously anyway.
“Get in here. I want to show you some stuff,” he says, cheerfully ignoring my comment made out of sexual frustration. “Besides, we’re both supposed to do something fun when we get a day off. Remember?”
“Yeah, we see how well that worked out,” I reply.
I slowly move into the living room, taking a seat in the recliner that came with the rest of his stuff. The living room is so small you can’t actually recline in it, but at least I can’t be as distracted by his pheromones from over here.
Raising his eyes to mine, he says, “Dude. How am I supposed to show you these townhouses Vee sent me when you’re all the way over there?”
Sighing, I decide the time has come.
“Before we talk about moving and buying a place together and whatever-the-hell else, we need to clear the air about that kiss, Chase.”
Chase closes his laptop and focuses all his attention on me.
“Okay, yeah. You’re right,” he says, picking at lint on his sweatpants. “I really like living with you, and I’m sorry I messed things up by pushing it. I don’t know what’s gotten into me lately. I’m doing my best to forget it happened.”
Deciding that holding back won’t be helpful for either of us, I let the truth fly.
“Here’s why that won’t work,” I start. “For starters, your face broadcasts your thoughts like a fucking billboard,” I tell him.
His head jerks back, and his eyebrows knit together, fully displaying his disagreement, confusion, and defensiveness, confirming my statement.
“What does that even mean?” he asks.
“It means when I wear something, say something, or do something you like, your face gives you away.”
He shrugs.
“I would’ve thought that’s a good thing. You never have to wonder what I’m thinking,” he argues, his cheeks turning darker by the second.
“The problem is that when you’re thinking that you want my mouth on you or you’re trying to picture what’s under my flight suit, I can read that, too.”
“Okay, come on. I had half a bottle of bourbon flowing through my veins, and you’re an attractive guy.
Plus, I got a little caught up in the whole kiss at midnight thing, and Kendra wasn’t there.
And the other day in the stairwell, I was running on two hours of sleep, had just watched you do this incredible thing like it was no big deal at all, and I was missing you.
We haven’t exactly hung out lately,” he explains, providing excuse after excuse.
“Mmm,” I hum. “And now? Have you caught up on sleep now?”
“Yeah. Last night was awesome. I got like ten hours.”
“And have you started drinking?”
“What?” Chase laughs, not yet understanding what’s happening. “No, man. It’s only noon.”
“Right,” I say as I stand up, stripping my hoodie and T-shirt over my head, tossing them into the recliner.
“What are you doing?” Chase asks.
“Proving a point,” I answer, stalking toward him on the couch.
“And you have to be half naked to do that?”
He’s nervous because he’s finally caught on.
And he knows he’s fucked.
“Yep.”
When I reach him, I move his laptop to the coffee table behind me, push his shoulders so his back is against the back of the couch, and straddle his lap. Chase immediately uncrosses his arms and moves his hands to my hips.
Fuck, they feel good there.
He’s avoiding my gaze. Instead, I watch as his eyes scan each of my tattoos.
“Chase.”
When I say his name, he slowly tilts his head back and looks up at me.
Just as I’d suspected, his pupils are blown to hell. Blackened by desire, they’ve swallowed every trace of his green irises.
“What are you thinking?” I whisper.
“Aren’t you supposed to tell me since, apparently, it’s written all over my face?”
His attempt at an indignant tone is adorable.
Placing my mouth next to his ear, I tell him every filthy thing his eyes just said to me.
“You want me to take away your choice by pushing this experiment so you can feel my lips on yours again without feeling guilty. You want me to drop all my weight onto your lap and roll my hips so you can feel my cock grind against your stomach, knowing it was you that made me hard. You want to taste my mouth again while your hands trace the ink on my sides. You want to know what it feels like to have someone come undone so fucking easily for you. You don’t want to have to explain yourself; you just want me to take from you, and you don’t want me to stop until your balls are drained dry. ”
I’m torturing myself, but fuck, this is already so far out of hand that if I’m in for a penny, I might as well be in for a pound.
Chase moans when I bite down on the flesh beneath his ear before continuing my verbal assault.
“You want to fully experience what makes Hanlon attracted to men. You want to know why I’m attracted to men. And most importantly, you want to know why you’re attracted to me. You want to know if the way that kiss made you feel was a fluke, or if it’s like that. Every. Single. Time.”
Chase produces a shaky exhale as I sit back, bringing my face within an inch of his and look him dead in the eye.
“How am I doing with those thoughts?”
He nods. “You might be kind of close,” he says, breathing hard as his eyes dip to my lips.
I want to kiss him so fucking badly. My balls are aching for it, and if my dick were any harder, it’d punch a hole right through him. But I summon every ounce of self-restraint I have and slide off his lap instead.
“What the fuck?” he says as I plop back down in the recliner and slip my shirt and hoodie back on.
“That’s what it feels like for me every time you want to platonically shove your ass against my dick while we watch a movie.
I like you, Chase. I’m obviously attracted to you.
But buying a place together is a really big fucking deal.
I have no qualms about kissing you, but you went into a total tailspin of guilt because of Kendra, which I totally get, but how do you expect me to live with you when your brain is telling you that you’re straight, your mouth is telling her you love her, and your eyes are telling me to fuck you? ”