70. Rorax
“Karan just left for Lyondrea,” Kiniera snapped, ripping out the wooden chair that was across the table from Rorax and collapsing in it with an angry huff. “He knocked out two of my men doing it.”
Rorax leaned back in her chair. She sat at her favorite table, behind the stalagmite pillar in the back of the library. Ever since finding out that Sahana was still alive somewhere, freeing herself from the Choosing took on a whole new level of urgency. It felt like the most important thing she could be doing.
Kiniera leaned forward across the table, her teeth clenched. “Karan is messing with my plans. He can’t just go into Lyondrea like a rutting, angry bull. He’ll get himself caught, likely tortured, and then if Sahana is alive, she’s going to murder us all if he gets hurt—”
Kiniera cut herself off. Her cheeks uncharacteristically flushed with anger, but her nearly colorless, pale blue eyes flitted up over Rorax’s head.
Rorax turned around just in time to see Ayres strolling through the books toward her. He was dressed in his usual high collared shirt, despite the heat, and Rorax hated how her core suddenly pulsed and felt heavy.
Ayres’s long, tattooed fingers gripped the top of the wooden chair next to her and pulled it out. She ignored the heat in her stomach and squinted up at him. “Hi?”
Ayres nodded to the House of Ice Emissary as he folded himself into the chair. The corner of his mouth tipped up as he pulled one of the books Rorax had stacked in the middle of the table towards him. “I’m here for my shift.”
The Death Guards had started taking shifts in the library since the Selection, and usually Cannon sat with Rorax in the afternoons.
Rorax’s brows furrowed as he flipped open the book to the first page. “I thought it was Cannon’s shift today.” He usually took the midday shift with her.
“I traded him. I have the night patrol again,” he said, ignoring her and focusing on his book.
Rorax raised an eyebrow at Kiniera, who looked between Rorax and Ayres with narrowed eyes. Kiniera looked at Rorax questioningly. Rorax just shrugged.
“Let me know when you hear back from the King, Rorax. Or if you hear anything from Karan.” Kiniera’s mouth pressed into a frown, and she pushed to her feet. “I’ll see you later.”
“I will,” Rorax said as she watched her old commander walk away.
When she was out of ear shot, Ayres leaned over and spoke in a low voice. “Kiniera gives me the creeps.”
Rorax snorted a laugh and looked over to find Ayres watching her. “She gives me the creeps, too. She was one of my first commanders at the Military Academy in Skavetsia. Her I mean business voice will always make me shiver.”
“How long was she your commander? How old were you?” he asked, leaning back in his chair.
“From when I was seven to fifteen. They recruited me as a full-time Heilstorm when I was sixteen.” Rorax looked down at the book open and forgotten in front of her. “For a few years after I was recruited the Wolf wanted to singularly focus on me. Get me up to speed to the rest of the Heilstorms.”
Rorax ran her fingers down the pages of her book slowly, feeling the words under her finger pads, remembering the near constant training, the whippings, the fear . . . everything in the name of ‘preparing her’.
“Those were the most intense training years I ever had. It makes the Contestar training feel like a light workout,” Rorax said.
“The Wolf . . . she was the one who recruited you?” He sounded gruff.
Rorax nodded, still not looking up at him.
“She was the one who thought teaching you how to read was an unnecessary task?”
Rorax’s eyes flew up to his, watching as he flexed his arms in anger.
“Who told you that?” But she already knew the answer.
“Jia.”
Rorax felt a blush bloom over her cheeks. “I know how to read. But I didn’t until a few years ago.”
“Sahana taught you, right?”
Rorax nodded. “Yeah, right after . . . not too long after the Siege.” Rorax peeked up at him from under her lashes, scared that she had ruined the moment, but he only had a thoughtful look on his face.
“What was the first book you ever read?” he asked.
A smile tugged at Rorax’s mouth as she turned back to running her fingers over the pages of her book. “A book on poisonous plants.”
Ayres laughed, and the sound wrapped around her like a warm blanket. “Why am I not surprised?”
“You shouldn’t be.” She laughed, too, and when she looked back up at him, he was smiling down at her, and for a single moment they sat, grinning at each other.
It had changed, this angry, vile thing between them. Now it felt . . . safe. Almost warm, and an awful lot like friendship.
Her chest felt warmer than before, and Rorax had to look away. “Come on, let’s study. Or I’m getting Cannon to switch his shift back.”
Ayres rolled his eyes but leaned forward over his book.
He came to study with her every day for the rest of the week.