Chapter 12 #2
I smiled into her thick, beautiful hair, understanding where her mind was.
“Because it’s right. This is what it feels like when it’s with someone not using you and you trust won’t abuse you.
I think that was the best thing you could have said to me so I stop freaking out I’m going to do damage to you. ”
She was quiet for several moments, rubbing her hand against my chest as I did the same along her back. “We’re going to do damage to each other. As long as we don’t do it intentionally and work to not keep doing the same damage, I think we’ll be fine. That sounds healthy and how it should work.”
“Yeah, that sounds like how it should work,” I agreed, hoping I could really pull that off.
I gave her another soft kiss and then went back to hugging her.
“So what’s next? We talk to your daughters?
You call your doc and set up an appointment for both of us?
Both, right? Then I’ve got to handle work and take a week so we can… Have that week. Then my—”
“It’s a lot,” she said gently.
Yes, yes, it was, and I wanted to just skip ahead like a month and feel more stable, like I couldn’t fuck everything up.
But then I’d miss our first time together and I’d never had a first time I’d actually cared about. I wanted that and to not gloss over anything important. She was going to be my mate after all.
“I can’t believe we’re going to fucking mate,” I whispered. “It sounds so unreal. Like—seriously un-fucking-real. You were just the beauty who stopped the bullying a few months ago that I thought…”
“What?” She pushed away when I didn’t answer. “What was your first impression of me?”
“I thought maybe you were off your rocker,” I admitted with a shrug.
I hurried on when she frowned. “You don’t talk like anyone I know, Aurora.
And I know now how you mix up words sometimes, but you called me a servant and—it was a trip.
I didn’t know you from a homeless person who thinks they’re Jesus. ”
“I was with you until that last part,” she admitted.
I opened my mouth but then closed it, scrubbing my hand over my head.
“I don’t actually know myself. I heard one of the docs talking about how someone smuggled in a human medical journal and there’s a mental condition where humans can think they’re god.
And it happens more often to those who are homeless? ”
She frowned. “Do they have a lot of homeless? We rarely have any with our different communities.”
“I heard it’s a real problem they ignore and blame on the people they’ve failed. But yeah, even the mob pack I was adopted into would hear of letting shifters in New York City sleep on the street. They’d always figure out something and get them back on their feet. It’s our duty as a community.”
“My selfish parents were the same. If a house burned down around us, they would live at the castle—no one was ever homeless. It reflected poorly on them for allowing it in the area they were in charge of.”
We both seemed to shrug it off and focus back on what we had to deal with.
“I will invite them all over for breakfast so they have to get to work or Theresa will take lunch to be here,” she told me.
“That gives us tonight to handle some more details and plan for ourselves first. And then yes, you handle things with work tomorrow, we start scheduling your medical appointments—all of it. We need more answers for what they—”
“How fucking nuts I’ll go?” I grumbled, scrubbing my head again.
“Stop,” she said gently. “I don’t want you to lose all of your pretty red hair.”
I blinked at her for almost a full minute. No one had ever said my fire-red hair was pretty. Mostly fake looking or unsettling. Pompous when it became my mane or mangy when I was a cub and didn’t have a mane but a tuft. I knew that was because I grew up around wolves but… Never pretty.
This woman really was sent to heal so many of my hurts.
She reached up and fixed it, having already commented that she was glad I was growing it out. She probably didn’t know that they’d forced me to buzz cut it in prison, but I’d always kept it pretty short and professional before.
Though I’d always wanted to see what it would be like longer. It seemed too flashy for an attorney and a way to announce I was different from the pack, but now… Now we were starting over to be ourselves.
And that was all possible because of Aurora. So I kissed her. “Thank you for saving my life.”
She blinked at me in shock this time before smiling. “We’re going to save each other and ourselves, Creed. You pushing me to fight and value myself—you have no idea how I’ve needed that.”
I did. I really did.
We spent the next few hours plotting and even looking at places to buy to get some ideas. I really didn’t care as long as there was enough room for me to stretch my legs and have an office of my own.
I was shocked how well we meshed. Everything we decided was easy. Well, ninety percent of it. Things she wanted, I didn’t care about either way or agreed on. She didn’t care about my things or agreed. Each time, we smiled at each other and kept listing what we wanted for the house.
The only place I absolutely put my foot down was when I realized she didn’t know how to swim. That was dangerous when she was a target and yes, she had to learn.
Plus, I wanted a damn pool if she was buying a damn estate.
“Yes, I suppose lions do like water,” she finally mumbled. “I’ve seen it enough in nature shows now.”
I melted. She’d been watching nature shows trying to understand me better?
Shit, I was falling behind then and needed to talk to the guys at work that I knew were vamps. I needed to understand my girl too.
It got awkward after dinner and when it was normally time for me to go. I realized she wasn’t rushing me off since she knew I wouldn’t get in trouble anymore… And she was probably never going to be able to make the first move or suggest anything.
“Can I stay?” I hedged. “Nothing funny but—just sleep.”
She cleared her throat. “A goodnight kiss before bed is more than acceptable.” Then she seemed to realize that she didn’t answer the question. “Yes, of course you can. We’re going to be living together soon after all.”
It sounded a bit abrasive, but it was her adorable awkwardness like she wasn’t trying to make it a big thing when we both knew it was a big thing. I wasn’t sure if it was for herself, me, or both.
Knowing Aurora, probably both.
“Can I ask something I probably shouldn’t?” I hedged when we were getting ready for bed. She was finding an extra toothbrush for me and distracted, so I figured it was the best time while she was already moving about.
She chuckled nervously. “We’re going to mate. I don’t think any topics will be off the table soon.”
I frowned. “No, that’s bullshit. You’re still your own person and can always tell me no.
There are some things about my childhood I don’t know I’ll ever want to share.
Not because of you but because talking about it gives it energy and power over me and I just want to leave it in the past. Talking about things can help or hurt. ”
She froze in what she was doing before moving again.
“I’ve told my doctor the same. Some things, like my younger sister’s death, I’ve accepted and processed.
Talking through something monstrous just gives the monsters more time to hurt your heart.
” She found what she was looking for and handed me a toothbrush. “Ask.”
“What does your husband look like?”
She blinked at me for several seconds before letting out a nervous chuckle.
“Of all the things I might have…” She let out a weird sigh, almost a mix of laugh and sigh.
She moved out of the bathroom and towards her closet.
“I’ve seen depictions of trolls more handsome than Kenneth.
There isn’t one attractive feature on him. ”
“What?” I whispered, shocked to hear that.
Honestly shocked I was so fixated when she’d been forced to marry him but… She’d been his for like a fucking century and sometimes it was hard for me. Now that we were going to mate—I was struggling.
My lion was. She had been someone else’s. Our mate had been.
Hell, they weren’t even divorced. He’d tried to kill himself and was in a coma. We were going to mate while they were still legally married.
Yeah, my lion had issues with that.
Fine, I did as a man too.
She frowned at me. “I never chose Kenneth, Creed. I was sold to that cretin. Yes, he’s as physically repulsive as his personality and brain. I thanked the gods repeatedly that the girls didn’t have any of his features. Well, Ellie has his nose, but that’s fine with the rest of her mother’s beauty.”
I stood there in complete shock as she talked about how ugly her husband was. Okay, so that was a relief when I knew she found me attractive.
She blushed when I was shirtless.
So this really could work, right?
“Don’t laugh,” she muttered when I finished brushing my teeth. “I know it’s not actual bed attire, but—I wasn’t raised or allowed to wear what women wear now. I know everyone’s been pushing but—”
“I haven’t,” I reminded her.
She stuck her head out of the closet and smiled.
“No, you haven’t, and I appreciated that.
” She let out a slow breath and then stepped out.
“And I appreciated how you simply complimented the way I looked in those jeans, not the comments others made.” She looked uncomfortable and I realized Xavier must have said something about the jeans.
I focused on what she was wearing and smiled.
“That’s cute and yes, women wear shorts sets to bed.
” I set down the toothbrush and moved closer.
“I think they’re normally a bit shorter or sleeveless when night sets but so what?
As long as you’re not going to bed in something uncomfortable—who cares, Aurora? ”
“I don’t. I just wanted to explain.”
I leaned in and gave her a soft kiss. “I like knowing where your head is, and I’m very glad you want to be a couple who communicates well, but you don’t need to explain anything to me.”
“I want us to,” she whispered. “Not because we have to. I want us to be the team.”
“Me too.” It was true.
And terrifying. I’d never been a team with a woman.
Here was to learning how to be one.