Caroline
I should have left when I had the chance.
I’m lying awake, staring at the ceiling of my room and the only thing I can think is, I should have left. I’m acutely aware of Killian somewhere on the other side of the door. Every sound makes me think he’s right outside, which is insane because why would he be outside my door?
I turn over in bed, pulling the duvet up over my head. I can’t deny that it’s a new space and that makes it harder to sleep. I also can’t stop thinking about my family.
I feel a prickle of guilt when I think about the fact that I brought the drama right to Killian’s doorstep. Then I feel angry because Gerry should have never told me to come here. I understand she wants the best for me, but how long can Killian and I live under the same roof?
He kept asking me subtle questions about Beckett the whole night and I don’t really blame him. What else is he supposed to do when his brother’s fiancée unexpectedly shows up at his apartment? I’m sure he only invited me to stay because he thinks I’ll be leaving soon.
My mind churns with thoughts and with the sounds of loud voices coming from the bar down the street, I somehow manage to fall asleep and only wake up to a loud banging.
I’m startled awake, my heart pounding as the banging comes again.
Somewhere above me, I hear loud rock music.
Not loud enough that it would have woken me up, but loud enough that Killian obviously can’t hear someone banging on the door.
I throw off the duvet and get out of my bed, my heart racing wildly.
What if it’s Beckett? What if everyone found out where I am and now they’re here to take me back?
I step out of my room and walk down the short hallway to the living area.
Killian’s rooms are on the second level and while he gave me a tour of the downstairs last night, he avoided his living space. Which told me I’m not invited up there.
Stopping in the kitchen, I eye the door…and then the knife block set on the kitchen counter. I don’t know if Beckett will stoop low enough to drag me out of here against my will, but then I recall those times when he gripped my arm a little too tight, when he pulled harder than necessary.
Whoever is on the other side of the door bangs on it again, and it settles something inside me. I walk to the counter and grab a knife, holding it against my side as I slowly walk to the door. I look through the peephole, expecting to see an angry Beckett on the other side.
My body sags with relief when I see two women standing there. I can’t see anything els, but I don’t think Beckett is hiding behind them. And if he is, then he’s going to meet the end of my knife.
Pulling my knife wielding hand behind me, I slowly open the door.
The woman standing in front has her hand raised to knock again, but lowers it quickly as the door opens.
Her brown eyes widen as she takes me in, the barbell in her eyebrow twitching slightly.
She glances back at the woman standing behind her, whose face remains neutral.
“Hi?” I say, though it comes out as a question. My voice is rough with sleep and I clear my throat lightly.
“Uh, is Killian here?” The woman with the barbell asks. She’s got thick dark hair that she’s pulled into a braid and she’s got tattoos on both arms.
“He’s upstairs, I think. Are you his…friend?”
God, I hope he’s not about to have a threesome while I’m right downstairs!
“Yeah, we live on the fifth floor,” she says. “I’m Eve. Killian and I work together. And this is Lilith, my wife.”
Lilith gives me a nod with a soft smile, which I return.
“Oh! Do you want to come in?”
“In?” Eve asks, looking behind me.
“Yes? I can get Killian while you wait?” I ask.
Wait, should I not let them in? Killian hasn’t told me any rules about having people over. He probably thought it wasn’t necessary since I don’t know anyone here other than him. But Eve and Lilith are his friends. Surely, they can be allowed in?
“Yes!” Eve says at the same time Lilith says, “We’ll wait here.”
I look between the two of them as they exchange a glance. Okay, I don’t know what’s all that about.
“I think it’s better if you come inside,” I say. I step aside and after a moment’s hesitation, Eve and Lilith follow. I turn to lock the door and hear a startled gasp from behind me. Turning, I see Eve pressing a hand over her mouth, her eyes wide and fearful.
It’s only then I remember I still have a giant knife in my hand, and I just invited them into the apartment. Either they’re here to kill me or I’m about to kill them.
I give them an awkward smile as I walk down the entryway.
“This isn’t for you. I thought you were someone else,” I explain, as I put the knife back in its place. “I’ll get Killian.”
I leave Eve and Lilith standing in the kitchen, looking around as if they’ve never been inside the apartment before.
I hesitate a second at the stairs leading up to the second floor.
The music is still loud and while Killian and I have some kind of truce right now, I don't know what will make him lose his patience again.
It’s not like I have a choice. I can’t leave Eve and Lilith standing in the kitchen indefinitely.
I climb the stairs which open up into a living area.
The walls are lined with shelves containing all kinds of books.
There’s a low table and comfy chair, shaded lamps, and hanging baskets hooked to the ceiling spilling green plants.
I walk towards where the music is coming from. Down a short hallway, there are two doors which face each other and one room at the end.
I don’t know much about Brooklyn real estate, but I didn’t think the apartments were this big. I walk to the last door, at the end of the hallway, where the music seems to be louder. There’s no way Killian will hear me if I knock. Do I just open the door?
Yeah, great idea Caroline, why not invade his privacy some more?
What am I supposed to do then? Maybe he will hear me if I bang on the door? I raise my fist when the music shuts off. The silence is sudden and ringing in my ears, like I’ve been plunged under water and the world has shut off.
I gently knock on the door.
“I’m here.”
I jump, turning around to see Killian behind me.
He’s just taken a shower. Water drips from his wet hair and travels down his shoulders and chest, which are completely bare because he’s only wearing a towel.
Tattoos cover both his arms and some of his chest, a silver chain gleams at his neck.
His body is sculpted to perfection, carved from stone, and it takes everything in me not to look.
The hallway seems small and intimate. I press myself against the door to keep some distance between us. My cheeks heat with a blush I’m sure he can see.
“What’s wrong? Did you need something?” Killian asks.
He doesn’t appear bothered by the fact that he’s in a towel.
“You have visitors,” I say, my voice steady despite the shakiness in my stomach.
Killian arches an eyebrow, raising a hand to brush back his wet hair. Can arms really look like that? There are veins and muscles which flex when he moves his arm. I have the craziest urge to bite his bicep.
I need to get out of here.
I might be sex starved, but Killian is the worst person to fantasize about. I was engaged to his brother until two days ago. Even if he didn’t hate all the drama which will come with that, I doubt Killian wants to touch me. Not that I want him to touch me.
“Caroline?”
I blink him into focus, realizing I was lost in my thoughts.
“What visitors?” Killian asks. I think there is an amused curl to his lips at my distraction.
“Eve and Lilith. They’re downstairs.”
Killian straightens. “They’re in the apartment?”
“Yes? Eve said she works with you.”
“She does, that doesn’t mean I want them in my apartment.”
I roll my eyes. “Not this again.”
His jaw flexes as he grinds his teeth. “I don’t like people in my space, Caroline.”
“And what am I?” I demand. Because he did ask me to stay. Even went so far as to threaten to carry me up here if I didn’t agree to come on my own. “Why did you ask me to stay?”
He exhales sharply, narrowing his eyes at me.
“I’ll be down in a minute,” he says through clenched teeth.
Okay, I guess we’re avoiding questions. I don’t want to talk about Beckett and he doesn’t want to tell me why he called me back here.
“Fine.”
I take a small step forward, but he doesn’t move. The hallway isn’t big enough for two people to stand side by side and I’ll only be able to leave if I sidle past him. If this is how he wants to behave, then fine.
I shift sideways and scoot past him, breathing in so no part of my body accidentally touches his. Again, I’m pretty sure there’s an amused smile somewhere near the vicinity of his lips but it’s like the man doesn’t know how to properly smile so I can’t be sure.
I exhale when I’m past him and I’m immediately surrounded by the scent of his body wash. It’s got that manly woodsy scent, maybe something cedar, which I happen to love.
I only get a few feet away before he stops me.
“Caroline?”
I look over my shoulder. He’s at the end of the hall now, the door I was standing by partially open.
“Yeah?”
“I guess this makes us even,” he says, his eyes holding mine for a long moment before disappearing inside the room.
I’m confused by his words as I make my way towards the stairs. What makes us even? My cheeks flush as realization hits me all at once. He means that we’re even because now we’ve both seen each other naked in a towel.
Downstairs, Eve and Lilith are exactly where I left them.
“Killian will be down in a minute. He’s just getting dressed,” I say. “Do you want coffee?”
Killian has the same fancy espresso maker I used at home so I at least know how to work it. But should I be offering them coffee? This isn’t my apartment and Killian clearly doesn’t want them here.