Caroline
“This man is in tears when I confront him,” Christina says, in her soft Jersey accent. “I’ve never in my life seen a grown man cry like that.”
“What did you do?” I ask, leaning over the counter.
We’re the only ones at the front of Black Ember Ink right now.
Eve’s next client hasn’t arrived yet and both her and Killian are in with their current clients.
Christina, who’s waiting for Killian, is telling me all about her cheating ex-boyfriend.
We met last week when she came in to confirm her appointment time and today, she’s even brought me a coffee.
“What could I do?” She tosses back her black hair. “I felt sorry for the poor man so I listened to him. Maybe I’m not wired correctly but all I wanted to do was laugh watching him cry.”
I giggle. “Why didn’t you kick him out?”
“He was crying. It was awkward,” she says, laughing.
“I’m impressed. I’ve never made a grown man cry before,” I say.
“Oh, you should! It’s kind of fun until they ruin your favorite hand towel with tears.”
I laugh again. I enjoy being at the front desk of Black Ember Ink. I’ve met more interesting people here than I have my whole life.
Briefly, I wonder if I should tell Christina that I have stabbed a grown man before. But that’s not something you tell a complete stranger.
Christina starts to tell me about her dog, showing me pictures on her phone. He’s so fluffy and cute, I wonder if I should get one. I’ve always wanted a pet but the one thing my mother wouldn’t allow was a dirty animal in her house. Of course, that rule didn’t apply when that animal was Beckett.
While Christina is in with Killian, I take the opportunity to step out and call Gerry.
“Darling, I thought you’d completely forgotten me,” she answers.
“As if I can ever forget you,” I say with a laugh.
“It’s good to hear you laugh,” she says. “It’s not a sound I’ve heard often.”
I haven’t had any occasion to laugh before.
I wonder if she knows how different her grandsons are from each other.
Not just their careers, but also the way they are with people.
Killian isn’t a people person. He doesn’t talk much, but he observes everything.
And if it were Beckett, he would judge every single thing.
He values people’s appearance more than what’s in their heart and mind.
“I’m sorry I haven’t had a chance to call until now,” I say.
“There’s no need to apologize. How are you doing?”
“I’m doing well. Killian’s been showing me around.”
Gerry hums thoughtfully. “The two of you are not fighting anymore?”
“We were never fighting,” I say. “We were just a little surprised by your scheme.”
“It was hardly a scheme. I simply knew that one or both of you would need the apartment so I gave it to both of you.”
“And neglected to tell us,” I remind her.
“Sometimes the best things in life come through surprises,” she says wisely.
I can’t deny that her surprise kind of worked out. I don’t know what’s happening, but I feel like Killian and I are on our own journey. He’s just happy letting me be whoever I want to be and that’s not an experience I’ve ever had before.
“How’s everything there?” I ask.
“Oh, you know,” she lightly brushes it off. “They’re still wondering where you are. There’s talk of a possible lawsuit.”
“For what?” I ask in surprise.
“You broke your promise to marry Beckett and humiliated him and the family. So now they want to sue you.”
“Did Beckett forget that he cheated on me?” I ask in outrage. If anyone should be suing, it should be me. He broke his promise first. But that’s just like Beckett, isn’t it? He only focuses on what’s been done wrong to him rather than all the wrong he’s done to other people.
“I asked him the same question,” Gerry says.
“Ask him if he’s still seeing his assistant.”
Gerry laughs quietly. “I’m sure he needs someone to heal his wounds.”
“Did my parents say anything to him?” I ask.
Gerry’s sigh and silence are all the answers I need. Even now, they support him over me. All the guilt I’ve felt over running away suddenly evaporates. They actually think that Beckett is right and that I humiliated him by running away.
I’m their daughter. Do I mean so little to them? I survived years of their cruel silence and lived through their disappointment. I tried to better myself, to be the daughter they wanted me to be by suppressing all my instincts and desires. Forget love, they can’t even respect me.
“Gerry, I should go.”
“Alright, darling. Take care of yourself.”
I disconnect the call and walk back into the shop. I try to distract myself by doing some work, but there’s literally nothing to do. I don’t know the accounting system well enough to update it.
So I do something that I’ve been thinking about ever since Killian and I had our tour around Brooklyn.
I pull out my laptop, and I start updating my résumé.
If anything, my conversation with Gerry proves that I can’t return to California.
There’s nothing left for me there. Which means I need to find a job here.
I’m just finishing up when Christina and Killian walk out.
Christina walks over to me, giving me air kisses. “Thank you for listening to me complain about my useless ex.”
“I have some experience in that department so I know exactly how you feel,” I reply.
Christina wrinkles her nose. “Let’s hope our future is a lot better.” She waves over her shoulder before walking out.
“What’s wrong?” Killian asks.
I turn to him in surprise. He’s looking at me with a watchful eye, his arms crossed over his chest.
“Why do you think something is wrong?” I ask.
“Your face says a lot more than you do.”
I frown at him. “What does my face say right now?”
“That something is wrong.” He turns, nodding over his shoulder. “Come with me.”
I follow him to the back. I’ve never been here before.
He leads me to his station, which is as clean and organized as I expected.
Grabbing an antibacterial spray, he starts cleaning his chair and equipment.
I lean against the counter to watch him.
He’s wearing a black T-shirt, which is pulled tight across the shoulders.
I watch the muscles in his back jump as he cleans.
There’s something about Killian that’s…that’s…that makes it hard to sleep at night, knowing he’s right above me in his room. That makes it hard to think straight when he’s around me. That makes me wonder what his hands will feel like on my body.
“Feel free to tell me what’s wrong,” he says, pulling me out of my thoughts.
I’d honestly much rather focus on him.
“Beckett wants to sue me,” I say.
Killian pauses, the muscles of his back pulled taut. Slowly, he turns to face me.
“What are you talking about?”
“I was talking to Gerry, and apparently Beckett wants to sue me because I humiliated him by running away.” I wave my hands in the air because this is the most ridiculous thing I’ve ever heard and had to repeat in my life.
“Did he forget the part where he cheated on you?” Killian asks.
“That’s exactly what I said.”
He goes quiet, his eyes shifting beyond me.
“No matter what happens you need to be prepared,” he says. “You can counter sue, but you need to prove that Beckett actually cheated.”
“Where am I going to find the proof? It’s not like he’s going to admit in court to being stabbed in the ass by his fiancé because he cheated.”
I pushed my hand through my hair. “I don’t even want to think about this. I don’t want to think about Beckett. Every time I do, I feel like there’s something wrapping around my neck and I can’t breathe.”
Killian turns to me. Placing both hands on my face, he tilts my head back until I’m looking at me.
The metal of his rings is warm from his heat.
My breath catches slightly when I realize how close he’s standing to me.
I can see the gold flecks in his blue eyes, see exactly how long his lashes are.
Why are they so long? It’s completely unfair.
“Listen to me. I’m right here,” he says. “You don’t have to worry about anything. If Beckett does anything we’ll take care of it together.”
I wrap my hand around his wrist. This is the closest we’ve ever been and it’s doing something to me I can’t explain. Why do I want to believe him? Why do I want to let him take care of it all? I should be able to do it on my own.
“You don’t have to do that,” I say. “I can take care of this. It’s my mess.”
He swipes his thumb back-and-forth across my cheek. “I know you can take care of it. That’s not going to stop me from being by your side. Even if you don’t need my help, I’m right here.”
I don’t even know what to say to that. My heart races inside my chest because of his proximity.
Living together, we do spend a lot of time with each other.
But we always maintain a safe distance from each other.
This time he’s deliberately stepped into my personal space.
He’s letting me know that he’s there for me.
I can’t remember a time when anyone has done that.
“Trust me, Caroline. I realize I’ve already made the mistake of leaving you once. I’m not going to do that again.”
“You didn’t leave me. I’m the one who didn’t want to go with you,” I whisper. And it’s a decision I’ve regretted a lot in the last five years.
“Maybe if I’d asked again, things would have been different.” His eyes drop down to my mouth and my lips tingle with the need to be kissed. My breath stutters in my chest. This feels like it’s happening too fast and at the same time something that should have happened a long time ago.
“You two realize this is a place of business, right?”
Killian and I jump away from each other, turning to see Eve standing in the narrow hallway. Her arms are crossed and she’s leaning her shoulder against the door frame.
“I’m still here,” she says. “The two of you live together, can’t you do this at home?”
“Eve,” Killian says, in that gruff way of his. “We’re not doing anything.”