8. I’d Protect Her
I’D PROTECT HER
R owan
I finished my drink and paid my tab for the evening. I needed to be clear-headed going into this tonight. I wanted to make her see how serious I was about this—about us. So serious that it actually scared me, if I was going to be honest with myself.
I’d been thinking about it all afternoon since my talk with Oliver.
I’d even called my mom on the way over here after I’d finished up with work.
She’d gently reminded me that I could end up alone and regret not taking the chance, or I could take the damn chance and find the best thing of my life.
She helped me realize the only real way to know if this was real and something I truly wanted was to go for it.
So that was my intention. To be real, open, and honest about how I was feeling when it came to Aspen.
It scared the fuck out of me, but my dad used to love telling us that we never knew unless we tried. So, I was trying.
Lucas walked back over with my card and receipt. “So did ya scare her off with the talk?”
“Eavesdropping doesn’t look good on you, man,” I chuckled. “But no, I don’t think I scared her off. Honestly, I have no idea what the hell I’m doing with this woman, but I’m trying.”
Lucas and I had gone to school together, and when shifts were slower around the bar, he helped us out at the ranch. It wasn’t as much anymore, though. The Roadhouse was becoming more of a staple during the rodeo circuit for out-of-towners.
He leaned down on his side of the bar in front of me and smiled sadly.
“I’ll give you a piece of advice—take it slow.
I have no idea where she came from or what made her run, but when she showed up, she was scared of everything and everyone.
Every male customer who came in made her jump.
She wouldn’t be alone with any of us except Ivy.
Someone fucked her up, Rowan.” He shook his head, watching her for a moment before looking back at me.
“She seems like she’s finally starting to be okay.
So just…don’t fuck it up for her. Ya know? She’s a sweet girl.”
With that, he picked up his rag from the bar and walked away to start cleaning up.
I looked down at my hands, still sitting atop the bar, and took a deep breath.
I didn’t want to fuck anything up for her, but I genuinely had no idea what I was doing.
I just knew that I wanted her every day and all day.
But I didn’t know how to commit or make a woman happy outside of my mom and sister, and something told me this definitely was not the same rodeo.
I’d never committed to a single person in my life.
I didn’t even have a dog for fuck’s sake.
Setting my head in my hands, I ran them up and down my face a few times. It was going to be fine. I could do this for her, fuck the inner turmoil. I was going to do this.
My phone started buzzing in my pocket. Pulling it out of my pocket, I smiled when I realized it was my sibling group chat.
Payton: So, I hear you’re in love, Ro, and I haven’t even gotten to meet the unlucky gal yet. What the hell?
Wyatt: Oh, he’s wayyy in love. I’ve seen it for myself.
Theo: Heart eyes since the moment he saw her across the bar.
Oliver: Damn. Here I thought I was special when you asked for brotherly advice. Seems everyone knows now.
Me: In love? Maybe. Should probably lock her down before y’all bunch of crazies scare her off, though.
Payton: As if I would ever! For Theo? Absolutely. But never the rest of you. Either way, Mom and I can’t wait to meet her!
Theo: I don’t need any help scaring a woman off, Payton. Thanks anyway.
Me: … probably shouldn’t admit that one, bro.
Payton: Moving on.
I shook my head. Of course, Payton had already heard about her.
This small town would settle for nothing less.
I didn’t know why I was shocked. They’d probably heard about the dance contest last night.
I don’t think there was a person there who didn’t have their jaw on the floor seeing us dance together.
Not that Aspen seemed to notice, which was fine with me.
Her eyes were on me all night, not worried about a single thing happening around us. It felt damn good.
Looking back down at the message thread with my siblings, I smiled as a few photos came through. It was screenshots from The Raven’s social media page. Apparently, they’d gotten a couple of candids of us dancing together and shared them with the caption announcing us as last night’s winners.
This was how Payton had known. I scrolled through the three photos she’d sent and realized quickly how she figured out I was in love. I looked really fucking in love. I cropped my favorite of the three, setting it as my new background.
One of the photos was from when we were line dancing. I had just spun her out, and she was holding my hand and looking back at me laughing.
The second was us side by side doing the two-step, smiling at each other, our eyes locked.
The third, however, was my new background.
It was when we had been slow dancing. My hand was on her lower back, the other holding her opposite hand.
Our foreheads were pressed together, looking deep into each other’s eyes.
We did look madly in love, and I wasn’t nearly as upset about it as I thought I’d be.
If anything, it inflated my caveman male ego.
It made me want to jump atop this bar and scream “ she’s mine ” at anyone who wasn’t sure or looked at her for too long.
I was shaking my head, trying to clear away the crazy male testosterone thoughts that had consumed me, when she finally sat down beside me again. “Did you still want to do…whatever?”
I could tell she was nervous. She was fidgeting slightly and refusing to look me in the eyes for too long. “Yes. Yes, I do. Did you need anything from your apartment?”
Her eyes widened. “Are we going to your place?”
“If you’d like to. I think I’d like to show it to you.”
She slowly nodded, eyes still wide. “Oh, uhm, I should probably grab a change of clothes or whatever.”
“Let’s do it.” I smiled and nodded my head toward the entrance.
She’d done better on my bike this time. We drove back to her apartment, and when I took the helmet off her head, she had a soft smile on her face. Almost as if she were enjoying herself.
I wasn’t sure what was going on in that beautiful head of hers, but whatever it was, I could tell it was still bothering her. I was going to assume it wasn’t me since she was here with me and seemed pleased to be. But I was still on edge, just waiting to rescue her from her own thoughts.
Now that I’d read all the reports Wyatt had accumulated for me, I had some idea of what she’d left behind in her past. I wasn’t sure if it was still an issue or not.
Did her ex know where she was? Should I be worried about him dropping in or causing her any issues?
I knew it wasn’t my place to ask—at least not yet. Not until she told me herself.
But that didn’t mean I couldn’t worry about her, right?
Taking a deep breath, I tried to work on focusing on the here and now.
I couldn’t even understand why I had the insane urge to protect this woman from the world.
She could clearly protect herself, right?
But then those hospital photos and police reports popped into my head, and I was suddenly wrapping my arm around her shoulders and pulling her closer as we walked into her apartment building. I’d protect her—even if it killed me.
Aspen walked a step ahead of me and unlocked her front door. Letting her walk ahead of me, I sat down on the couch, making myself comfortable.
“So, little angel, do you want to talk about whatever is bothering you now? Or should I wait till later to drag it out of you?” I smiled knowingly when she glanced back at me, so she knew I was mostly teasing her.
But at the same time, I desperately wanted her to know she could talk to me.
This was new, yes, but I was here for her.
I needed her to get used to the idea. I also needed to tell my brain to chill the fuck out and not rush anything on her.
She looked away from me as she grabbed a backpack out of her closet and started to toss some clothes into it, along with her phone charger and toiletries. She zipped up the bag and then dropped her arms down to her side and let out a long breath.
Walking over, she sat down next to me on the couch, her hands in her lap. “I think my ex has been calling me.” She glanced up at me, trying to gauge my reaction.
I slowly nodded my head, keeping my best poker face in place. “I’m assuming you don’t want to hear from him?”
“I left and moved here to get away from him. I changed my number; it isn’t even under my name.
But it’s been an unknown number…it’s calling more and more each day.
I don’t answer it. I let it ring. I just know it’s him.
I know that sounds crazy, but…I know it’s him.
” She was rambling and picking at her fingers, the more she talked.
I reached over and took her hand into mine, gently squeezing it. “You don’t sound crazy, Aspen. Do you want me to have my brother look into it?”
She looked over at me, her brow scrunched a bit. “Your brother?”
I smiled. “Yeah, Wyatt. I mentioned before, but he does all that tech stuff and security shit. Maybe he could look into the calls and see if it’s really your ex calling or maybe some spam caller.
” I shrugged. This is the least I can do for her, honestly, after majorly invading her privacy the way I had.
Although I’d have Wyatt do it either way for her if it would make her feel safer.
She nodded. “If he has the time. I’m not trying to add to his plate or anything. I’m sure he’s plenty busy as it is.”
I shook my head. This girl never wanted to bother anyone or ask for help with anything.
We weren’t doing that anymore, though—she had me.
I reached over and scooped her up, bringing her into my lap.
She wrapped her arms around my neck, and I wrapped mine around her waist, keeping her close against me.
I leaned in and pressed her lips to mine in a slow, gentle kiss, telling her everything my words couldn’t—that I was here to help.
I was here to protect her and help her gather the strength to protect herself, too.
I was in her corner. I could feel the tension slowly dissipating from her body as I deepened the kiss.
My hands slowly ran up her sides until I buried them in her long hair, keeping her close as I devoured her mouth with my own. There wasn’t anything like kissing Aspen Woodluck. At least nothing I’d experienced in this life.
I pulled away, keeping her face close to mine with my hands still in her hair. “Let’s get out of here, little angel,” I whispered, both of us now slightly breathless.
Aspen nodded as a blush sank into her cheeks. “Let’s.”