Chapter 33
Late Sunday afternoon, I sat on my couch, rubbing my eyes as I let out a slow breath.
I was exhausted after last night, but I wasn’t sure if it was from not getting home until a little after one in the morning or because I spent most of the night lying in bed, sifting through a myriad of jumbled thoughts.
After our romp in the coat closet, Wes and I fixed our clothes into place before slipping out one at a time.
I went straight to the restroom to clean myself up because, true to his word, he was quite literally dripping down my leg—it didn’t help that I’d gone from a scrap of fabric for underwear to entirely commando, thanks to him tearing them off of me.
After I cleaned up, I fixed my appearance in the mirror—the creator of the smudge-proof lipstick I had on deserved a goddamn medal because, by some miracle, it wasn’t smeared at all.
I’d returned to the ballroom just in time to watch Lucas and Callie be honored for their donation.
And as I stood next to my date…after what happened with Wes, I knew that ballroom was as far as it could go.
Corbin seemed like a really great guy, and I didn’t feel right continuing with anything after what I’d done with Wes.
At least not that night. I thanked him at the end of the gala for bringing me as his date and told him maybe we could stay in touch.
I guess only time would tell how that panned out.
But I couldn’t help but think of my date for other reasons I probably shouldn’t be.
I’ll be damned if someone else is going to swoop in to try and fucking take what’s mine.
Wes’s words from last night were still replaying in my head, but more so the latter part.
What’s mine. I wasn’t sure exactly how to take that.
Because on one hand, I didn’t understand where the sudden wave of possessiveness came from, but on the other…
I didn’t exactly hate that he said it. And I wasn’t sure what to make of feeling that way, either.
I’d never seen Wes act the way he did last night.
Hell, if there was one thing he’d always been adamant about, it was that he did not get jealous.
Truthfully, I was joking when I called him out on it in the coat closet.
I said it just to rile him up because I knew he hated the mere idea of being perceived as being jealous in any form. I hadn’t expected his response.
It elicited questions I wasn’t sure I even wanted to know the answers to because asking them felt like it would be taking this thing between us somewhere it was never meant to go.
And that wasn’t the only part of last night I was thinking about.
We’d broken another rule…technically two, if Wes was truly jealous.
Too caught up in the heat of the moment and the frenzy he immediately sent my mind and body spiraling into, I didn’t even think of a condom. Clearly, neither did he.
Once I realized and mentioned it to him, his expression became slightly tinged with worry, but I assured him it would be fine.
I wasn’t necessarily worried, but I couldn’t shake this feeling that he wasn’t as calm about it as he tried to appear.
I didn’t want the slip-up to make things weird or awkward.
I didn’t know if that would happen. I’d never made that slip up before.
I’d always been cautious and mindful of that, but Wes seemed to be able to make me forget a lot of things and cross lines I never thought I would in a million years.
Sleeping with him in the first place was a perfect example. And that had proven to turn into something I never anticipated.
I don’t think going into this that either of us expected it to even last as long as it had.
I sure as hell didn’t. Yet, here we were, more than a year into it, breaking rules we set, and our times together were becoming more frequent with what seemed to be no expiration date in sight. Not that we ever set one.
And I was okay with that. For now, at least. I thought. Maybe. I sighed as I dropped my head back on the cushion of the couch, rubbing my eyes again.
The truth was, I didn’t know what the hell I thought anymore. About him. About me. About anything. And I couldn’t even pinpoint why.
Maybe I just needed a nap. A nap sounded good.
I grabbed the throw pillow, fluffing it before tossing it at the end of the sofa.
I had just laid my head down and covered myself with the throw blanket when I heard a knock.
I huffed an annoyed breath, flung the blanket off, and stood, walking to the door.
When I peered through the peephole, my brow furrowed as I drew back, composing myself for a moment before I opened the door.
Wes was standing on the other side. “Hey,” he said softly.
“Hey…” I stared at him for a moment before stepping aside to let him in.
He walked inside and turned as I shut the door behind me and looked at him. “Sorry to drop by unannounced like this. I was heading to my mom’s for dinner and wanted to swing by…” He rubbed the back of his neck. “I owe you an apology for last night.”
I shook my head. “Wes—”
“No,” he cut me off. “I got carried away and wasn’t thinking.”
“Well, it takes two, ya know. You weren’t the only one who got carried away and wasn’t thinking.”
“Still…” He blew out a breath. “I don’t know what came over me last night…if it was the alcohol or what, but regardless, there is no excuse, and I feel bad about putting you in that situation.”
The alcohol.
I no longer needed to wonder why he acted the way he did last night or said the things he did. Alcohol. It made perfect sense, considering he wasn’t acting like himself with the jealousy thing. I wasn’t sure how or why I hadn’t put two and two together.
So, we hadn’t broken two rules. Just one. Because the jealousy wasn’t even real.
It was just the alcohol.
I shoved the thoughts aside, focusing back on the conversation at hand.
“Wes, again, we both got carried away. You are not solely responsible for something like that. I’m a whole-ass adult and was there, too, and am just as much to blame.
And, for the record, I’ve never been with anyone else without protection, and I know I’m clean. ”
“Well, shit, Princess…” He let out a soft chuckle. “I wasn’t worried about that.”
I huffed out a laugh. “Well, if you’re worried about a little surprise nine months from now, don’t be. I’m on the pill, and I took extra precautions. So, we’re good there.”
He let out a breath of what I could only assume was relief.
“You just added ten years back on my life.” I chuckled.
“And, for what it’s worth, I haven’t been with anyone else without protection either.
Actually, this is probably a conversation we definitely should have had back when we first made the deal. ”
“Yeah, well, you know what they say…hindsight is always twenty-twenty.”
Wes chuckled as he stared at me. “Yeah…that’s for sure.”
“And just so you know…” I paused, contemplating whether to tell him or not because it would probably inflate his ego somehow…but I felt like he needed to know, especially after last night. “I…I haven’t been with anyone else…since we started the deal, I mean. I’ve only slept with you.”
I watched his expression morph into a boastful gleam, and he tilted his head with a smirk. “Really?”
I rolled my eyes. “Don’t let it go to your head. I just don’t have the need for anyone else when you’re there and so very willing.”
“Uh-huh.” He grinned, not buying my words in the least. “So, what I’m hearing is that I’m straight fire in bed.”
I shook my head as I let out a sigh. “I knew I should have just kept my damn mouth shut.”
Wes laughed at my annoyance as I suppressed a smile. “Well, I should go. Sunday family dinner.”
“You have fun with that.”
“I’ll try.” He started for the door. “I’m sure Haley and I will have our usual argument over her dating life choices.”
I opened the door and held it open for him. “Jesus Christ, leave that poor girl alone.”
“Don’t tell me what to do. Especially with my own sister.”
“As a girl with two older brothers who often inserted themselves where they didn’t belong, I can tell you that you should probably back off before she shuts you out on purpose.”
“Where’s the fun in that?” He smirked as he walked by me and stepped into the hall, making his way to the elevator; he hit the button, and I started to close the door while he waited for the cart.
“Hey, Princess…” I glanced around the door and met his gaze down the hall.
“For what else it’s worth…I haven’t been with anyone else either. ”
I scoffed through a laugh, and he smirked just as the elevator doors slid open and he disappeared inside.