20. MAX #2
“You’re on.” We put our heads together and started building.
And yeah, we got a couple pieces backwards and once we put the wrong piece on first and had to backtrack when everything didn’t fit, and yeah, we snarked at each other when those things happened, but it all felt different now.
I wasn’t on edge, waiting for the big goodbye.
Our screw-ups didn’t matter so much because they weren’t going to be the last impression he had of me, and I wasn’t quietly angry at him for not intuiting what I wanted and giving it to me without me having to ask.
Forty minutes later, we had two sets of drawers set up about three feet apart on the wall opposite the bed.
Lucas screwed two supporting legs onto the back of the desktop piece and then hefted it on top of the drawers; suddenly, I had a desk.
We both moved back and studied it critically, looking for anywhere we might have gone wrong, but neither of us spotted anything.
“Hell yeah,” Lucas said, holding his hand up for a high-five, which I gave him.
“We’re getting better at this. You should’ve bought more furniture, I told you. ”
I stuck my tongue out at him. “And sponge more off you? Not happening. We can make another trip to Ikea after I have some savings to spend, how’s that?”
He laughed lightheartedly, even though as far as I could tell, I hadn’t said anything funny. “I’ll live with that. I’m going to head upstairs and get Eli to help with the bed. Once we’re done with that, you wanna get some lunch somewhere?”
I still wasn’t entirely comfortable with the stares and questions I got on the street and in shops, but the more I’d gone out, the better I’d gotten at handling it.
It wasn’t quite so painful now, and I attributed that to the support of the limb loss group more than anything else.
As far as I was concerned, those people were magic.
So did I want to wander somewhere to get lunch with Lucas?
Yes. Yes, I did. “Works for me,” I told him with a nod.
He nodded back and bounded out of the room, heading for the stairs. Five minutes later, he was back with Eli in tow. “Hey Max,” the big man chirped.
I gave him a wave. “Hey. Thanks for helping.”
“Not a problem. Where do you want me?”
I opened my mouth to answer him, but startled when I felt Lucas’s hand creeping up my back until he was gripping the back of my neck.
I closed my mouth and looked up at him inquiringly, wondering if he’d been trying to get my attention, but he was focused on Eli, who he was watching with a very intense gaze.
Eli glanced at where his hand was sitting and met Lucas’s eyes.
Something unspoken passed between them, and then Eli nodded and grinned again.
When Lucas didn’t say anything back, I opened my mouth again and spoke.
“We wanted your help shifting the bed to sit under the headboard. Lucas can’t do it alone and I can’t push very well. ”
“Yeah, no sweat. We’re just putting it right there?” He pointed.
“Yup,” Lucas said, finally speaking but not releasing my neck. I glanced up at him again, but his eyes still weren’t on me. It finally hit me: this was possession. Lucas was claiming me with his obvious grip on me. I couldn’t hold back a grin at that thought. I kinda liked possessive Lucas.
“Let’s do it,” Eli said, and took hold of one corner of the bed. Lucas took the corner diagonal from that, and the two of them hauled the bed sideways until it lined up with the headboard. “That it?” he asked, dusting off his hands. “Anything else I can do to help you two?”
We shook our heads. “All we have to do now,” I said, “is unwrap the mattress and let it spread out on the bed.” I gestured to where the mattress was rolled up and compressed against the wall.
I kind of couldn’t picture how it was going to expand into a full, bed-sized piece of padding, but I supposed I had to trust Ikea on this one.
“Well, let me grab it for you.” Without waiting for permission, Eli hefted the surprisingly heavy mattress package and laid it on top of the bed’s slats. “Oof. Geez,” he grunted.
Lucas laughed. “Yeah, you didn’t have to haul that one up the stairs. Count yourself lucky.”
Eli smirked. “I get the impression that you’re the one getting lucky today.”
That startled a very non-manly giggle out of me.
I slapped my hand over my mouth and looked at Eli with wide eyes.
He’d picked up on the feelings between me and Lucas, huh?
I hoped he wasn’t homophobic; if he was, I’d be moving out sooner rather than later.
I didn’t want to share a house with a homophobe.
Meanwhile, Lucas was nodding firmly. His hand drifted from the back of my neck to the front of my chest and he pulled me and my chair back against him. “Yup,” he told Eli proudly.
“Awesome. Good for you.” Eli slapped him a high-five. “I’ll leave you to it, then. You probably want to test out the new bed.” He wiggled his eyebrows meaningfully.
I rolled my eyes at him. “Uh-huh.”
With a wave, Eli let himself out just as quickly as he’d come in. I turned to Lucas within the circle of his arm and raised an eyebrow, demanding an explanation for his sudden and unexpected bout of possessiveness.
He breathed in through his nose and had the grace to look abashed. “Um...sorry?”
“For what?” I asked pleasantly.
“The, uh…” He grabbed the back of my neck. “This. I just wanted to make sure he, you know, knew you weren’t available anymore. Uh…” He paused, his eyes widening. “Wait, you’re not, right? We didn’t actually say what this was going to be even after we said we loved each other.”
I raised my hand to his and pulled it away from my neck, holding it instead. “I am definitely not available,” I confirmed. “And neither are you,” I added firmly, “right?”
He shook his head quickly. “Definitely not available. I’m all yours, Max.”
I smiled. “Damn straight.”