Chapter 36
Sierra
I was getting cold.
I hadn’t planned on wandering around the ranch for this long, and the more pleasant weather from earlier in the day had shifted to cold and snow while I’d been out here looking for Lucky.
Dammit! I really didn’t want to leave my cat outside.
She had always been an indoor cat, and she had no idea how to survive out here.
However, I knew I needed to quit.
I was going to have to hope she could find her way back home.
I pulled my hat down over my ears.
I’d had the forethought to take my scarf, gloves, and a warm hat.
I just wished I’d grabbed my heavier jacket.
At the time, it had just seemed like overkill since I was wearing a thermal top under a heavy sweatshirt.
I’d hoped to go out for a short walk with Asher to the barn to check on the horses when he’d finished his meeting.
Afterward, I’d planned on sitting down and talking with him about my pregnancy.
I’d put it off for a few days, but I knew I couldn’t do it any longer.
I’d seen the OB doctor. She’d told me much of the same information that I’d gotten from Reese.
The pregnancy would be high-risk, but things were looking normal so far.
I took one last glance around the area and sighed.
I had to give up.
The snow was getting heavy, and I had a long walk back to the house. Luckily, I had a little moonlight now, so I could see where I was going even though the snow was coming down pretty hard. I’d have to hope the wind didn’t kick up more before I got home.
I pulled out my phone and brought up the compass to show me the way back home.
I’d been careful about my directions.
I wasn’t that familiar with this particular area of the ranch, and the last thing I’d needed was to get lost.
I was carrying a child now in a high-risk pregnancy.
I had to be extremely careful and not take any unnecessary risks.
I wrapped my scarf around my face, more than a little worried about Lucky.
I’d keep my eyes peeled on the way back and hope I’d find her. The problem was that my girl was hard to spot at night with her dark coat. My only hope was to catch some eyeshine.
I trudged along, searching desperately for my pet as I headed toward the house.
I paced myself, moving at a comfortable speed.
I squinted as I saw what looked like a light in the distance.
That couldn’t be right.
I knew I’d have to walk to the top of the rise in front of me before I’d have any kind of view of the house.
Nevertheless, the light got brighter and brighter until I could recognize someone on a horse.
It had to be Asher.
Who else would be out here in this weather?
Apparently, his long meeting was over.
The horse pulled up right in front of me, and Asher reached down for my hand.
“Get up here,” he said in an obviously pissed-off tone.
He was mad.
Really mad.
I could hear it in his voice.
Maybe I should have left a note or called him, but I’d been so focused on recovering Lucky that I hadn’t thought about it.
I’d also had no idea how long his telephone meeting would last. It had gone on for a really long time before I’d gone outdoors.
I held out my hand, and he leaned down and grasped my forearm.
We’d done this maneuver before, and I put my foot on his sturdy boot to catapult myself into the saddle.
I faltered a little because he pulled me into the front of the saddle instead of behind him.
He wrapped a blanket around my body, snaked a powerful arm around my waist, and headed back to the house at a comfortable canter.
The doctor had advised me not to ride, but I did need to get back home and Asher would rather die than to let me fall.
I wasn’t worried about my safety.
Asher didn’t say a word.
We rode in silence for a few minutes until I finally said, “Lucky is gone—”
“She’s in the house,” he interrupted in an angry voice that I’d never heard from Asher before. “Do you have your damn phone? You didn’t answer my calls.”
Okay, he was really, really mad.
Maybe he had a right to be angry.
I really should have found a way to let him know that I was looking for Lucky.
Damn cat!
I probably should have known that she wouldn’t go far, but I was relieved that she was home.
She’d been basking in the heat of the house while I was out here searching for her.
It didn’t take long for us to get to the house.
“I’m sorry,” I said as the lights of the house came into view. “I should have called you. I have my phone. I silenced it earlier because you were in a meeting and I was close by your office for a while. I didn’t want to disturb you.”
I’d forgotten to turn the ringer back on.
Silence.
Asher didn’t say a word until he came to stop right in front of the front porch.
“Get in the house and get warm and dry,” he ordered as he helped me slowly lower and get my feet on the ground.
He waited until I opened the front door and then headed to the barn.
I brushed the snow off my jeans and closed the door. I put my outdoor clothing away in the closet. Nothing was damp except for my exterior layer of clothing, so it wasn’t necessary for me to change.
I wandered into the living room and stood in front of the fireplace, absorbing the warmth.
Lucky greeted me with an enthusiastic meow, but she didn’t bother to get off her bed.
Apparently, my feline was tired from her adventure outdoors.
I let out a sigh, hoping that Asher would get over his anger.
I had a nice dinner that was ready to put in the oven, and I was a little nervous about our discussion later.
Yes, I should have contacted him.
We were always courteous about things like that.
If our situations were reversed, I would have been concerned about his whereabouts in this nasty weather.
Especially if he wasn’t answering his phone.
Dammit!
I wished I would have remembered to turn my ringer back on.
I could have avoided getting him this upset.
I heard the front door close loudly, and Asher appeared in the living room an instant later.
The look on his face was ominous as he asked, in what sounded like a barely controlled tone of voice, “First, are you okay? Are you cold? Are you dry?”
Crap! He’d been worried sick, and I hated myself for that.
I hadn’t really expected that since I’d never left the ranch.
“Yes, no, and yes,” I answered. “I’m fine, Asher. Honestly. I was wearing thermals under my coat, and I watched my directions when I got away from the house. I was headed back to the house.”
Once he was certain that I was okay, the fury that unleashed in his expression was almost frightening.
Almost.
“Do you have any fucking idea what could have happened to you?” he bellowed in a voice loud enough to make Lucky get off her bed and scramble out of the room.
“We have a goddamn blizzard coming. You could have ended up in a whiteout somewhere that no one could get to you or find you. Thermals won’t protect you from freezing to death when you can’t get home for an extended period of time. You could have died out there, Sierra.”
Oh, God.
He was beyond furious.
If we had neighbors, they would have heard him bellowing at the top of his lungs.
“I wasn’t—”
“You could have,” he interrupted angrily.
“You’re yelling at me, Asher.”
That had never happened before.
Yeah, we’d had heated discussions, but I’d never seen him like this.
He was completely losing it, and Asher never lost complete control of his emotions.
With my history of abuse, his bellows probably should have triggered me, but they didn’t.
He might be worried sick, but Asher would never harm a hair on my head.
I knew that, even though he was totally flipping out at the moment.
“Hell, yes, I’m yelling. I was frantic about your damn safety, and something isn’t right with you. I can feel it. I think you might be sick, but I have no fucking idea because you haven’t talked to me about it. That ends right now. When I get over being this livid, we’re going to talk.”
Oh, God.
He knew.
Maybe I should have anticipated that, but I hadn’t.
Asher had an uncanny ability to sense when things weren’t right with me, but if I’d known that he’d be this worried about me, I never would have tried to wait until the right moment to tell him the truth.
I probably had seemed troubled.
I’d been incredibly preoccupied with this pregnancy.
I’d been super concerned about what Asher was going to think and how he was going to feel.
I’d also been worried about whether or not I could get through this pregnancy without losing my baby.
So many things…
“I’m not sick,” I said in a rush. “Asher, I’m pregnant. I’m so sorry. I didn’t mean for this to happen.”
Once those words were finally out of my mouth, to my mortification, I dropped onto the couch and started to cry tears of intense relief. Whatever happened, Asher knew the truth, and I wasn’t going to have to hide anything from him anymore.