Chapter 13 Blade
“What’s this?” Arwen asks, picking up an envelope from my end table.
I walk into the sitting room, carrying us each a glass of wine.
Dinner went really well. If I’m being honest, it was better than I imagined it would be.
We had an easy conversation over dinner.
I learned that Arwen worked her way through school.
She never met her father, and her mother raised her but passed away a couple of years ago from a heart attack.
I’ve also learned she’s smart, vivacious, and no nonsense—qualities I’m immensely attracted to.
We’ve carefully avoided any conversation about Olivia, my brother, or my time in the pen.
I did that on purpose, and I’m pretty sure she did too.
I don’t want the past to color the attraction it’s clear we’re both feeling.
For me, it’s unexpected. Something I should probably fight but lack the will to.
I never thought these feelings would hit me again.
I thought Olivia had broken that in me. If not her, then definitely what come afterward.
Apparently, I was wrong.
She puts the envelope down and reaches for her wine. And I smile as I sit down beside her. I take it as a win when she doesn’t move away from me. Hopefully the wine will get her defenses to fall even more.
“Didn’t anyone ever teach you it’s not polite to snoop?” I ask, taking a drink, my eyes never leaving hers.
“They tried,” she grins. “It’s a note from your brother, isn’t it?”
“How do you know?”
“Because Olivia got one too. The therapist in me is wondering why it’s not been opened?”
“Do you know what was in Olivia’s?” I ask, studying her.
“Parts of it, and before you ask, I’m not telling you.”
I nod, not expecting anything less. “Fair enough. I got my letter today. I started to read it but couldn’t bring myself to just yet. I will.”
“Don’t you want to know what was so important to your brother?”
“Yes, although a bigger part of me is afraid. It’s also hard to face that whatever is inside will be the last thing I will ever have from my brother. I don’t think I’m ready to face that yet. Do you think that makes me a coward?”
“No, just human,” she murmurs, studying me.
“That’s something I haven’t felt like in a long time,” I confess.
“Human?” Her smile broadens as she looks at me under her impossibly long eyelashes. “Did you think you were an alien?”
“Smartass,” I laugh.
“I’m just joking. I get it. In many ways, you and Olivia have both been through tremendous trauma. You need time to regroup, rebuild, and become stronger.”
“Don’t think I’m weak, Arwen. I’ve never been weak in my life,” I growl lowly, not wanting her to picture me as less than I should be.
“No one in their right mind would ever do that, Blade. Sometimes getting stronger has nothing to do with weakness, but with embracing change and the road before you.”
“Are you psychoanalyzing me, Doctor?”
“Just … observing,” she says.
“Do you know what I’m observing?” I ask, leaning in to grab her wine glass. I take it and put it—along with mine—on the coffee table in front of the sofa.
“What’s that?” she asks, and I don’t think it’s my imagination that she sounds breathless.
“I’m noticing how beautiful you are, how your lips look glossy and tempting. I’m noticing how you stare at me a little too long, and I’m praying that means you want to know what it would feel like to kiss me, because I sure as fuck am wondering that about you.”
“We shouldn’t,” she says at once, but her tongue slides out to lick her lips. That’s the only signal I need. I slide my hand along the side of her neck, instantly enjoying the way her pulse jumps against my hand.
“I definitely think we should,” I respond softly, bringing my lips to hers.
Her fingers bite into my shirt. I freeze for a second, waiting to see if she’s going to push me away.
When she holds me closer instead, I breathe easier.
I take her lips, moaning as her sweetness hits me, and she lets my tongue inside.
It seems I’ve been waiting too long for this kiss.
Part of me worries that this woman is far more dangerous than I ever imagined, but I push those nagging thoughts aside and decide to just enjoy the here and now.
It’s been too long since I’ve enjoyed the softness of a woman and the sweet, tender, innocent reactions that Arwen is giving me.
I plan on enjoying it while I can because if life has taught me nothing, it’s that moments like this don’t last for men like me …