TWENTY-FOUR
Nate
“D ad?” Kara crosses her legs on a kitchen chair and pours herself a bowl of cereal. “Are you going to marry Rose?”
The spoon I’ve been washing slips out of my hand and into the sink full of soapy water. “Um, I’m not sure, Kara. Those kinds of decisions take some time.”
“Like how long?”
I retrieve the spoon and place it on the drying rack. “Usually a couple of years. I’ve only known Rose for a few months.”
“If you marry her, would she be my new mom?”
I lower my shoulders and dry my hands on the towel before turning to her. She’s stirring the cereal in her bowl when I scratch my hand through my hair. “Mom will always be your mom.”
“Yeah, but,” she pushes her mess of bedhead blonde out of her face so she can take a bite, “Rose would be my mom too, right?”
I pull out the chair next to her and sit down with a deep breath. “If I marry Rose…or anyone else…she would help take care of you, and love you just like I do, and just like your mom did, but it would be up to you if you want to call her ‘mom.’ That’s your decision.”
She shrugs as she chews her cereal and says quietly, “I think I might like to call her mom, maybe.” She pauses and then adds abruptly, “That’s not my final answer though!”
I laugh and smooth her hair. “You have plenty of time to think about it. Rose and I still need to get to know each other for a while to see if we want to get married.”
“She’s nice, and she’s pretty.” Kara shrugs again. “Seems easy to me.”
I laugh again and stand to return to the dishes. Nice and pretty. If only it were so simple.
“Do you think she wants to marry you?” Kara asks from behind me. “You’re really cool and handsome.”
“Thank you, Kara,” I chuckle. “But I think she needs some time to decide too.”
“I already know I want to marry Owen,” she says simply.
I almost drop a plate. But I respond as easily as I can. “Who’s Owen?”
“He’s in the other first-grade class at school. But I see him at recess. He said he wants to marry me too.”
Dear lord, it’s starting already. I take a deep breath and keep my back to her like I’m not shaken by this at all. “What do you like about him?”
Her spoon clanks inside of her bowl as she responds. “He’s the fastest of all the boys in our grade, even in piggyback races. I’m his partner, and he said I don’t even weigh him down.”
“You ride on his back for the races?” I feel the grey hairs forming already.
“Yeah, all the girls do. The boys always do the carrying. We have races every day, from the big tree to the swing set near the fence. Maddy rides on Tyler’s back, and Jackie is usually with Cody or James. But Owen and I always win because he’s the fastest.”
“Sounds like he’s a good partner.” I drain the water from the sink. “What else do you like about him?”
“He has blonde hair, like mine. I like that we have the same color. And, I don’t know, he said he wants to marry me too, so I guess we’re a good match.”
I dry my hands and turn to her again. “When did the two of you decide you wanted to get married?”
“Yesterday,” she replies like it’s the most obvious thing in the world. “But we won’t get married until we’re grown-ups. This is just a plan.”
“Of course.” I nod, leaning casually against the counter. “So will I get to meet this young man tonight at your class play?”
She stands and brings her bowl to the sink. “Sure.”
“Rose said she’d like to come watch too. Is that ok?”
Kara lights up. “Really? Yes!” She pumps her fist. “This is the best!”
“Alright, and maybe we can all get some ice cream afterward.” I grab her backpack from the counter and pass it over as she pumps her fist again. “Now, hurry up. The bus will be here any minute.”
She slings her backpack over her shoulders and then wraps her arms around me and squeezes tight. “I love you, Dad.”
I hug her back and press a grinning kiss on the top of her head. “I love you too, Kara. I’ll see you tonight.”
“K.” She heads to the door. “Bye!”
“Have a good day.” I wave as she disappears outside.
***
That evening, after I pick Rose up on my way out of the city, we head to Kara’s school. Most days, she participates in the after-school program so I can work a full day, but today, Jackie’s mom offered to watch her for the afternoon and bring her back to the school for the performance.
“Apparently, we’re meeting Kara’s boyfriend tonight.” I hold the cafeteria door for Rose, and we step into the space that’s been converted into an auditorium, complete with a stage.
“Kara has a boyfriend?” Rose gapes at me.
“Well, they’ve already agreed to marry, so I guess he’s technically her fiancé.”
“Wow,” Rose says as we find empty folding chairs. “How long has this been going on? And where is my invitation?”
“Two days, I believe.” I thumb through the paper program. It’s Jackie and the Beanstalk , a play on the original, and funnily enough, Kara’s friend Jackie is the lead.
“So, she dropped this news on you—”
“This morning,” I complete her sentence with a laugh.
Rose examines her own program. “Are you ready to give your daughter away?”
“Thankfully, they’re waiting until they’re grown-ups to actually have the wedding.”
“Oh, right, of course. Kara’s a smart girl.”
Part of me wants to tell her Kara had been asking questions about us this morning too, but I fear Rose might feel undue pressure from that conversation, so I keep it to myself.
“So, who does she play?” Rose is running down the list of names in her pages.
“A cloud,” I reply, pressing my lips together to hold in a smile.
Rose lifts her eyes to mine as if she’s expecting what I’ve said to be a joke, and I wish I could laugh and say it was, but Kara is indeed playing a cloud.
She blinks and smiles warmly. “Oh! That’s, um, an important part I’m sure.”
I chuckle and point toward the stage, where there’s a cardboard cutout of a cottage with tissue paper smoke swirling from its chimney. “She worked really hard on the set. Painted the windows and door, and those little flowers at the bottom.”
Rose sits up taller to get a better view over the small crowd. “Ah, now that doesn’t surprise me at all. She did a great job.”
“Dad!” Kara suddenly appears to our right, wrapped in white cotton balls and shuffling down the row of chairs. “Can you fix my hair? I can’t find Jackie’s mom.”
It looks like Jackie’s mom put her hair in two braids, and one of them has completely come undone, leaving a mess of waves on that side.
“Ummm…” I set my program down and lift my hands. “I can try. Do you have the hair tie?”
She shakes her head. “No, it fell out. I can’t find it.” Her eyes dart to the stage. “It’s gonna start soon. Hurry please!”
“Ok, hang on.” I look around me like I might see a rogue hair tie suddenly present itself, but to be honest, I don’t even know how to make a braid, so I’m already three steps behind.
“I’ve got one,” Rose interjects next to me, conjuring a small black elastic from her purse. “I’ll fix it!” She smiles and gestures for Kara to come closer.
She slides her fingers through Kara’s hair and braids the loose side so quickly and so expertly, I think I might hire her to come do Kara’s hair every morning. I can do a ponytail or a single clip, but that’s as far as my skills go. And it takes me way longer than I’ll admit.
“There you go.” Rose snaps the elastic into place and turns Kara around so she can make sure the braids match. She rests her hands on Kara’s shoulders and grins. “You make the perfect cloud.”
“Thanks, Rose.” Kara gives her a quick hug and then bounces away. “See you after the show!”
I take Rose’s hand. “Thank you for that.”
She sits back and crosses her legs. “Oh, it’s no problem. Girl can’t go onstage with only one braid.”
I beam at her and press my lips together. I adore her so much it almost hurts. It’s moments like this that have me wishing I could say those three little words to her.
But not just yet.
Soon. I tuck them carefully away, but I don’t think I’ll be able to hold them in much longer.
The audience suddenly hushes and I blink toward the front of the room as the first small actor steps up onto the stage.
“Once upon a time, there was a girl called Jackie. She lived in a small cottage with her mother. Jackie and her mother were very poor. All they had was a cow…”
The play is short and sweet, and Kara is indeed the perfect cloud. She floats gracefully across the stage while Jackie climbs the beanstalk on her big adventure.
When it’s over, Kara comes skipping toward us with a big grin. “Did you like it, Dad?”
“I loved it!” I hug her tightly. “You did so well!”
She lets go and then throws her arms around Rose too. “I’m so glad you came!”
“Of course!” Rose beams. “I wouldn’t have missed it.”
“Did you like it?” Kara steps back with her hands on her hips.
Rose nods enthusiastically. “It was so good! I can tell you all worked really hard on it. Your dad said you painted the set?”
Kara grins. “Me and Owen painted it together.”
I raise a brow. “The Owen you’re going to ma—”
“Shh, Dad!” Kara lifts her finger to her lips. “Be cool. He’s coming this way. I don’t want you to embarrass him.”
“Right, sorry.” I lift my hands in apology.
A young blonde boy dressed as a farmer comes running up to Kara and grabs her hand. “Mrs. Evans wants us all to sign our names on the poster, come on!”
“Hang on.” Kara tugs back. “Owen, this is my dad.”
Owen reluctantly drops his shoulders and peers up at me with a distracted smile. “Hi, Mr. Hale.”
I outstretch my hand, appreciating the formality. “It’s nice to meet you, Owen.”
He gives it a quick shake and then turns his eyes to Rose.
“This is our friend, Rose,” Kara explains. “She came all the way from the city to watch our play.”
Rose takes his hand too. “You were the best farmer up there.” She gestures to the stage.
When Owen grins, he reveals an empty space where his new front tooth is just starting to come in. He nods bashfully and says with a lisp, “Thanks.”
“Kara says the two of you met at recess?” I ask as casually as I can.
“Yep, Dad.” Kara quickly takes Owen’s hand again and pulls him away from us. “I’ve gotta go. Be right back.”
When they’ve disappeared into the crowd, I glance at Rose. “Did I embarrass her?”
Rose chuckles and tucks her program into her purse. “No, but Kara made that quick escape to ensure you didn’t.”
I shake my head and sigh. “She’s growing up too fast. I don’t know how I’m going to get her through high school. I know absolutely nothing about raising a teenage girl.”
“You’re doing just fine.” Rose laughs again. “Besides, you may have help by then.” She gives me the quickest knowing glance before she turns toward the refreshment table at the rear of the room.
I can’t help but grin as I follow her with a lightened step.
***
Later that evening, the three of us sit in the living room finishing up Kara’s favorite Disney movie. I took the armchair, and Kara is curled up under a blanket with Rose on the sofa.
She has her knees tucked up and her head on Rose’s shoulder while the colorful glow of the screen flashes across their faces. Rose is trailing her fingers absently through Kara’s hair as her little eyelids occasionally drift open and shut. I’ve had a hard time focusing on the movie, because watching the two of them is healing in a way I wasn’t prepared for.
Since Amber’s death, I’ve done my very best to grow closer to Kara, trying to fill the roles of both a father and a mother. But as hard as I try, nothing quite matches the gentle, nurturing touch of a woman. She needs a maternal presence, and seeing Rose take that place, even just for small moments like this, restores a void.
When she glances up and catches my observing gaze, I smile softly and return my focus to the movie, which is beginning to roll credits. I sit forward in my chair and turn off the TV. “Ok Kara, time for bed.”
Kara blinks and sits up quickly, pretending like she wasn’t just inches from sleep. “I’m not tired!”
I chuckle. “Well, it’s bedtime.”
She sighs. “Can Rose tuck me in?”
I shrug at Rose, who pulls the blanket from the two of them, stands up with a smile, and says, “Come on, sleepy head, let’s get you off to bed.”
Kara takes her hand and they pad down the hallway and out of sight, just long enough for me to clean up our dishes from dinner and pour us each a glass of wine.
When Rose returns, she eyes the glasses with a raised brow. “I didn’t take you for someone who’d have wine around the house.”
“I’m not.” I pass her one. “But I’m fully invested in learning to enjoy the things you love.”
She takes a small sip. “So, next you’ll be joining me at the mall?”
I laugh and swirl the wine in my glass. “I expect I’ll be there to carry your bags, but yes.” When I look up, she’s watching me with content, absorbed eyes. I don’t think I’ll ever grow tired of them. “Sorry, your evenings here usually include Kara,” I say regretfully.
“I don’t mind at all.” She takes another sip and then inches closer to set her glass on the table behind me. “You’re a packaged deal, and I love that. She’s really the sweetest girl.”
I take a long swig before I set my glass next to hers. Then I wrap my arms around her waist and pull her into me. “You’re really great with her.”
Rose traces her finger along the collar of my shirt. “She reminds me a little bit of myself at that age. Endless dreams and a lot of energy.”
“And look at all you’ve achieved, Miss Soon-to-be COO.” I grin as I tuck her hair behind her ear. I lower my hand and trail it slowly across her jaw.
“I wanted to ask you…” she says slowly. When she looks up at me, her long lashes flutter like wings, and I know I’m going to say yes to whatever it is. “In two weeks, my family is going to a wedding up on Caribou Lake. I have a plus one.”
Another evening with her parents.
“It would be for the whole weekend.” She confirms the painful detail. “But it’s a beautiful lodge, and they have lots of fun activities planned.”
“Will I be…” I pause to find the right words. “Will I be welcome there?”
She tilts her head sympathetically. “Yes of course. No one is going to prevent you from coming. There will be guests from all over the state and beyond.”
“Yes, but,” I clear my throat. “That doesn’t mean I’ll be welcomed .”
She frowns apologetically and blinks up at me through those long lashes.
“Will Malcolm be there?” I have to ask.
She holds my gaze. “Honestly, I don’t know. But please don’t worry about that.”
I take a deep breath and lick my lips, staring deeply into the eyes of the woman I’d walk through fire for. Evidently, I know my answer.
“I’d love to come.” It comes out a little hoarse, but I smile to reassure her. “A weekend with you in a beautiful place…what more could I ask for?”
She rises to her toes to press her mouth into mine. She has the softest and fullest lips I think I’ve ever kissed, and it takes every effort not to pull one of them between my teeth each time they touch mine.
When she leans away, she licks her lips and grins. “I like the taste of wine on you.”
I brush her hair off her shoulder and dip my head to her neck. She’s a carefree kind of gorgeous tonight, and I can’t stop myself, so when she lets her head fall back, I slide my hands down over her ass and pull her tighter against me. She lets out a small gasp so I do it again for good measure, slipping my fingers lower still until I can feel the heat of her through the denim of her jeans. She sighs and arches into me as she slides her hands over my shoulders and up around the back of my neck.
I love her like this. Not pretending to be someone she’s not. Not afraid she might step across the invisible line her parents have drawn. Just completely free to be herself in my hands. I’m already vowing to make her feel this way as often as I can.
When I press my fingers into the seam of her jeans and scrape my teeth across her neck, she takes a shaking breath and leans back to look me in the eye, almost incredulously. “What about Kara?”
Kara is the last person on my mind right now, but I know what she means, so I lift one hand and touch my finger softly to her lips with a smirk. “Her bedroom doesn’t share any walls with mine, but can you be quiet?”
Her eyes twinkle and she raises a brow. “It depends on what you’re going to do to me, Nathaniel.”
“No one calls me that…” I chuckle as I take her hand firmly in mine and lead her toward my room. She follows eagerly, and when I pull her inside and she pauses to take in the space, I realize she’s never been in here before. We’ve made out plenty of times on the sofa in the living room, but we’ve never taken it to my room until today. It’s a simple space, much like my room at my cabin, except this one is larger, and instead of a pair of hand-carved wolves on the dresser, there’s a framed landscape photograph of Alaskan snow peaks at sunrise above my bed. I’m a man of little décor.
After a moment to observe, Rose returns her gaze to me, revealing the fire that has never left her eyes. I’m still there too, so, I don’t hesitate. I loop an arm around her waist as I shut the door and turn the lock, then I step into her and quickly press her into the wall to capture her lips with mine again. She always responds when I play a little rough, and my new favorite thing in the world is watching her come undone in front of me, so I sure as hell am going to use that to my advantage now.
With my body pinning her in place, I rake my hand along her jaw and press my thumb against the warm skin just below her ear as we kiss, holding her to me. I grasp the button of her jeans and flick it open, and she gasps against my mouth when I immediately shove my hand into her underwear and find the wetness that’s already pooled there— for me . I grin into her lips and circle my fingers, slowly at first.
She breaks the kiss and arches her head against the wall, biting her lip and drawing in labored breaths. With my thumb at her jaw, I coax her mouth back to mine and dart my tongue out to slide along hers, still tinged with wine.
She grasps my shoulders like a vice, and I can tell she’s truly holding on to me, fearing she might slide to the floor. But I’ve got her. I’m not letting her go anywhere as I press closer still and nip at her lip.
She’s getting close, and her legs start to shake under her own weight, so I pull back to catch her gaze. I lift one finger to my lips and grin.
Her nails dig into my shoulders and she squeezes her eyes shut briefly before they meet mine with desperation. “I…I’m not sure I can stay quiet…I need you…to help me.”
Oh, I can do that .
I lean my forehead into hers and quicken my fingers. Her body tenses almost immediately, confirming I’ve had her right on the edge, and then she clenches her teeth to hold in the sound that begins to erupt from the back of her throat. I slide my hand to her lips and clasp it firmly over her mouth as she rides the wave and moans into my palm. It muffles the sound just enough that I’m sure we can’t be heard from two rooms away.
Her body contracts for just another moment before she melts into my arms and I drop my hand from her mouth and replace it with my lips. If I didn’t have her pinned against the wall, she absolutely would have sunk to the floor.
“My God, Nate…” she sighs against me. “You play a dangerous game…”
I chuckle as I loop my arm under her knees and lift her spent frame. I carry her to the bed and lay her gently in the center before stepping back to peel my shirt over my head and unbuckle my belt.
Rose shimmies out of her clothes while I remove my own, but her eyes never leave mine. For a moment, I just stand at the foot of the bed, gazing at the beautiful woman in front of me. She’s flawless; every inch of skin perfectly smooth, every curve laid out like they were made for me. I was already hard, but the sight of her before me solidifies the point.
When I crawl up the bed, she parts her legs and I settle myself between them, kissing each of her cheeks gently before finding her lips. “You’re perfect,” I whisper against them. Then I trail my kisses down to her chest and back up across her shoulder. Goosebumps spread across her skin and I wish I could kiss each one as a reminder that I’m making her feel this way.
I rise up again and meet her penetrating gaze. She lifts a hand and places it gently against my cheek. My eyes drift shut as I lean into it.
“ You’re perfect,” she echoes my sentiment, smiling softly when I open my eyes again.
I position myself at her entrance and push into her, slowly, watching her eyes drift shut at the sensation, and then I begin to move. I can’t believe how perfect she feels, like she was made for me. I drop my head to the crook of her shoulder and pick up my pace as the room around us fades away.
We’re just heat, and sweat, and frenzied breaths as we climb to the top and spill over the edge. This time, I capture her mouth with my own to muffle her moan, and she clings to me so tightly I pull her with me as I roll down onto the sheets to catch my breath.
She lays her head on my chest and sighs happily. “I like you a lot.”
I chuckle as I run my fingers lazily through her hair. There’s more I want to say. So much more. I l ove this woman. Fully, and completely. But in this moment, when everything is perfect the way it is, I’m happy to agree. “I like you a lot too, little spoon .”