Chapter 30 Jade #2
A growl slips out of Tieran’s mouth, possessive and predatory as he steps slightly in front of me. Oliver’s already walking away, clearly bored with the whole conversation, and Olivia hardly notices, her attention back on Tieran.
“You look good, T.” Her eyes trail down his body, and I have to remind myself the night is about the children, or I would be hauled out of here by security. “Really good. We should catch up soon.”
Her implication is more than clear, and I’m about to take a step forward, but then Tieran is pushing at the small of my back. “Our turn. Have a good night,” he dismisses her, ushering me forward in the queue.
“Are you alright?” I ask once she leaves, unbothered by his dismissal and with a gleam in her eye.
“Hmmm? Oh yes, I’m fine. I’m going to go use the bathroom quickly. I’ll come find you later.” He pauses like he wants to give me a kiss before departing but then realizes he can’t and strides toward the exit.
I watch him go the whole way before the disgruntled bartender grabs my attention and I order a champagne.
I’m standing at one of the back walls, feeling uneasy after the encounter with Tieran, his ex, and the sudden shift in his mood when a voice pops my peaceful bubble.
“Don’t you look ravishing,” Lawrence exclaims with absolutely zero sincerity.
“Lawrence.” My voice is clipped. “Where’s the missus?”
“Left her at home with the kids. Gotta see what’s on offer here, and I couldn’t well do that with her attached to my hip.”
I down the rest of my drink, desperately wishing another could magically appear in my hand. “Do you have any respect for women?”
“The ones who do what they’re told.”
My face doesn’t hide how I feel toward him. “You’re disgusting.”
“Careful, Ms. McKallen. That mouth of yours will get you in trouble one day, maybe even soon.” There's a weird look to his eyes I can’t decipher. It’s knowing and smug and so damn cocksure, it makes my hackles rise.
“What is that supposed to mean?”
He taps his glass against my empty one. “Have a good night.” And then, he strides away.
The whole conversation leaves me feeling rattled, and I decide I’m going to go find Tieran, needing his presence to ground me.
I head out of the ballroom in search of the bathrooms when I hear voices around a small alcove. I slow, straining my ears to listen when I hear Tieran’s voice, then Olivia’s. My heart starts pounding so loud, I have a hard time hearing what’s being said until I inch closer.
“Come on, T. No one has to know,” Olivia says, and my mind conjures images of her running her hands down his chest. I feel physically ill at the thought.
“Stop, Olivia.” His firm voice does little to ease my anxiety.
“You remember, don't you? How good it used to be with us.” I’m going to throw up. “You could have me right now, in this alcove.” Her voice is soft and seductive, the total opposite of my raspy resonance.
“I don’t want you. Olivia, so stop touching me and let me pass.”
“You’re playing hard to get. That’s cute.”
“Stop it.” His voice is edging on panicked, and the sound breaks my heart, pulling me out of my trance as I step around the corner to see her roaming her hands all over my man.
“I think you should take your hands off him.” I don’t even recognize my own voice. It’s cold—lethal and filled with the promise of violence if she doesn’t stop touching him.
Olivia’s head whips to me. “Oh, it’s not what it looks like.” She honest to God winks at me. “We have history. I’m sure you get it.”
“I don’t, actually. From where I’m standing, it looks like a desperate girl who finally realized what she fumbled and is now looking really pathetic trying to force herself on him.
I would suggest you go find your sad excuse for a date and stop touching my bo—” I catch myself on the word boyfriend at the last second— “player before you embarrass yourself further.”
Her face goes beet red, and she swallows hard, at a loss for words.
“I always thought you were putting on this too cool for everyone else persona, but you’re just a heartless bitch, aren’t you?” I flinch at her words as they strike home, reminding me of all the other times other people said something similar.
“Fucking leave, Olivia,” Tieran bites out.
She pouts, finally relenting as she walks away with a sway to her hips, as if she’s walking a fucking runway.
“Are you okay?” Tieran asks, placing his hand on the side of my neck, pulling me closer to him.
I breathe in the scent of his cologne, crisp and clean, with a soft undercurrent of sandalwood.
“Yes, but—”
“But what, baby?”
“Can we go?”
His smile lights up the dark turret we’re standing in. “Let’s drop off a fat check at the donation site and sneak out of here.”
“Did that upset you?” I ask, unable to hold back the question that's been running through my mind since we left and started walking along the banks of the Thames.
Tieran’s thumb traces a lazy path along the back of my hand while our fingers are interlocked. It’s nice, holding his hand out in the open. “Hmm?”
“You left when we were waiting for drinks. Were you upset about Olivia? Does it still hurt seeing her?” My heart beats out of my chest, nervous to hear his answer but happy the river's current can sweep me away if it confirms my worst fear—that even though he says he loves me, maybe I was just a bandage over his wounded heart.
Tieran stops dead in his tracks, but I don’t register it until I’m being yanked back by his hand now clutching mine even harder than it was before.
“What? No! Fuck—no, baby. I’m sorry. I didn’t think about how that would look to you.
” He steps closer to me and releases my hand, only to cup each side of my face.
“When I saw her, I felt so stupid. I couldn’t believe I never realized how wrong she and I were, and I only know that because how I feel about you is—” He pauses, trying to find the words.
“You’re like the wind, Jade. Everywhere, all around me, lifting me up and breathing life into the world—into me.
When I walked away, it was because I was seconds away from showing everyone exactly what you are to me.
I needed a second to get myself under control before I did something that put you at risk.
When I came out of the bathroom, she was waiting and cornered me before I could get away. You know the rest.”
Insecurity claws at me, making me feel foolish. “I was worried that—I started to feel like maybe it would be easier for you…if you were still with her. She’s beautiful and uncomplicated. You deserve th—”
Tieran leans forward and kisses me, effectively stealing my breath and making me lightheaded. I clutch the lapels of his tuxedo for balance as he scrambles my brain with a kiss so tender, I can feel it stitching pieces of me back together I didn’t know needed healing.
“Being with you is the furthest thing from complicated for me,” he whispers against my lips.
“Whenever you look at me, it feels like a thousand tiny lightning bolts striking every inch of my skin. I know you think you’re hard to love, but it’s the easiest, most unavoidable thing I’ve ever done.
” His eyes bore into mine, pleading with me to understand.
“Nothing could have stopped me from falling so horrifically in love with you. You are fierce and kind. Bold and soft. Terrifyingly smart and maddening.” He smiles, and I let out a soft laugh.
“I have never met anyone like you, and I know you’re too good for me, but I’m too much of a selfish prick to care.
Everything feels possible with you by my side.
All I want is to give you what you give me, and I’m terrified I won't be able to measure up to all you deserve. There is not, and never will be, a limit to what I’m willing to do to show you just how magnificent you are. ”
Even now, after all we’ve been through, he doesn’t see what I see.
Beside us, the river sparkles under the light of the moon, reflecting like little diamonds dancing on the water.
“I’ve never felt like I belonged anywhere, Tieran.
I didn’t have friends growing up, had even fewer when I entered adulthood.
You’ve seen what my mother is like… The only time I ever felt safe growing up was when I would watch rugby on weekend mornings with my dad.
But being isolated for so many years…I think it messed me up. ”
“You’re not—”
“I’m not finished. From the moment I met you, I felt like I was home, even when the very thought of you terrified me…
Some days, it still does, but talking to you at the pub that first night was the most fun I had ever had in my whole life, and every day with you since has been the same.
You are funny and infuriating and selfless.
I—I think you might be the best friend I ever had,” I admit begrudgingly, if only because I know his head will grow two sizes from the truth.
“Try not to sound too put out about it,” he laughs.
“It’s an upsetting revelation.” Tieran pinches my side in retaliation.
“Aanya is going to be fuming when I tell her,” he teases, grabbing my hand once more and pulling me along the sidewalk.
“I’ll deny it. I’ll scheme an elaborate tale about you being a compulsive liar.”
“My love, we both know the only person you’re able to lie to is me.”
My cheeks blush, thinking about all the times I did lie when I was denying all the feelings I had for him. “I’m reformed.”
“Is that so?”
“Yes. I’ve been the picture of virtue.” He raises a single brow at me, as if to say, oh really, with the things we’ve done?
My blush magnifies, and I face forward, gazing toward the city’s skyline.
The Elizabeth Tower, illuminated in golden light and housing Big Ben, stands proud, the stunning spires of Westminster just beyond, and in front of us on the left is the giant Ferris wheel that spins tourists around at a leisurely pace while they observe the sight of London sprawled out before them.
“Do you want to go for a ride?”
Tieran’s low voice breaks me out of my daze. “What?” He nods toward The Eye, and I get his meaning. “Oh, no. That’s a gimmick meant for tourists.”
“It could be fun.”
“Someone might see us. We’re already being reckless, walking around and touching each other the way we are.
” I may not be as recognizable here as I am back in the States, but it has happened a few times, and I wasn’t with a six-foot-four, absurdly hot rugby player who is fairly famous in this country then.
His expression turns severe. “I don’t want to hide what you are to me.”
“And what’s that?”
“Everything, Jade. You’re everything.”
My heart stalls in my chest. The way he’s looking at me as if his world stops and starts because I’m alive is not something I’m used to, and I’m starting to get drunk on the feeling of his open adoration. He’s so free with his feelings, so uninhibited, with no expectations of me.
I must be silent for too long, because he jumps in before I can respond and tugs me forward. “C’mon, Hellfire. It’s late, and I’ll bribe the uni student running the line to give us our own car. Let's go do something we’ll never forget.”
Maybe I should be worried about the mischievous glint in his eye, but I’ve come to realize I don’t care what happens, so long as he’s by my side for it all.