Chapter 42
The next few days flew past as we welcomed visitors for our second week while getting the Highland cow fold settled into their new home, which included walking them round the farm out of hours and familiarising them with the barns we’d be using during the experiences for grooming and feeding.
Paula and Glen had already got the calves used to their halters and being groomed but they hadn’t yet interacted with the public.
Getting them used to interacting with us would be fairly straightforward but we needed them to also be comfortable around strangers.
Across the summer, we were planning to run some free tester events with Willow’s and Hunter’s families and any friends of theirs and Lindon’s who were eighteen or older.
The retired dairy cow herd were going to be easier to prepare as they’d all been cuddle cows for quite some time so all we needed to do for them was get them used to their new surroundings.
Getting to know the herd and fold and their personality quirks filled me with happiness and, although they needed more attention than the horses and goats, I made sure I spread my time around.
There was no way I could have got everything done without Jude’s help and Mam and I had had further discussions about whether there was any way we could offer her a job but we’d had so much up-front expenditure with the replacement fencing, barn conversions, the new sign and welcome banner and the repairs to The Dovecote – not to mention the purchase of the starter pack itself – that we just couldn’t afford it.
With further major expenses pending around setting up the shop, preparing for the guinea pig handling, and redecorating and refurnishing The Dovecote in order to let it out as a holiday cottage once more, money was far too tight.
And we were running at a loss and would be for quite some time, although hopefully there would be a big uplift in visitors after the schools broke up for the summer.
‘Please let us find a way to offer Jude a job,’ I whispered to the farm on more than one occasion. ‘She loves you as much as we do.’
Despite a dull week with intermittent rain showers, the weekday visitor numbers were up from week one and increasing every day so it was all going in the right direction.
There’d been an increase in traffic to our website and a massive uplift to followers on social media thanks to Maddie crowning herself marketing manager and appointing Willow her second in command.
The pair of them posted photos and videos from around the farm several times each day, intermingled with photos and footage of the delicious offerings from the café.
Even though we weren’t ready to launch the cow cuddling experiences yet, I’d agreed to them including the cows, hinting at exciting new additions coming soon, so long as they didn’t commit to any dates.
I loved what they were doing to promote the business but my biggest win was seeing Maddie so involved and excited.
She’d made several great suggestions already and I suspected there’d be plenty more to come.
‘I’ve got what I hoped for,’ Mam had said to me, tears in her eyes after Maddie showed us a post that was on its way to going viral. ‘Three generations of our family working together. It’s wonderful.’
It really was.
Our unexpected Shetland pony additions had settled in nicely. Rowan had taken to being a new mam brilliantly and Hazel was thriving. I loved how attentive Caleb was, stopping by to see them every morning before work and when he got home.
Caleb was definitely a friend now but I felt our connection deepening every day.
Sometimes we talked about day-to-day things like the food, music and books we liked.
Caleb admitted to not being a big reader but said he devoured anything – fiction and non-fiction – relating to farming and animals.
Sometimes we talked about our childhoods and university years and at other times our conversations were deeper, exploring the relationships we’d both recently lost.
There was no doubt in my mind that I had exceptionally strong feelings for Caleb.
If I went for a walk with the dogs, I hoped to spot him out running.
Every time I returned to the farmhouse I glanced up at Peartree Cottage and, if his van was outside, I longed to catch a glimpse of him.
Mam and Jude kept telling me I should knock on his door and ask him out for a drink.
I’d stopped trying to convince them I wasn’t attracted to him as I clearly was but they understood why I wouldn’t want to initiate anything with Caleb when I was still confused about Laurie.
‘There’s no rush to make a move,’ I told them. ‘It’s not like he’s about to move out any time soon. He loves it here.’
‘It’s not moving out that’s the issue,’ Mam said. ‘It’s him meeting someone else. A good-looking lad like that, kind, good with animals… I bet there’s plenty of women out there desperate to get his attention. Might even be a few who invent an ailment with their pets just to see him.’
She raised a good point. Hadn’t Elenna met him at the practice?
It unnerved me but I wasn’t going to act on it.
If I’d been able to let go of the uncertainty around why Laurie had left me, I might have made that move but the question nudged at me several times each day and, until it stopped doing so, it was too risky to do something about my deepening feelings for Caleb.
During the times we were together with the animals, I felt the air crackling between us so I was pretty sure my feelings were reciprocated but Caleb had never made any move to kiss me or said anything to suggest he was open to being more than friends.
When I told Jude I was confused about that, she suggested that Caleb might also be confused by mixed signals from me.
While we were clearly becoming closer, she thought that I was also keeping him at arm’s length, held back by my lack of closure with Laurie.
She was right and I hated that Laurie had that hold over me.
Jude kept telling me to ring him or email him and demand to know the truth but between running the farm, settling in the cows, keeping an eye on our Shetland ponies, conversations with Maddie about alternative universities and discussing her plans for the introduction of the guinea pigs, I genuinely hadn’t found the time, exactly as Jude had predicted.
I wished I’d taken her advice and bitten the bullet before the cows arrived.
* * *
The sun came out on Saturday and the visitors followed it to the farm.
It was our busiest day by far and there was a buzz about the place.
Across the week, Des and Hunter had fitted several sturdy wooden benches at various points around the farm and some simpler backless benches along the tracks between the pastures for those who couldn’t manage the full walk or who simply wanted to sit a while and take it all in.
Late in the morning, I was by Lane End talking to a family when I spotted Caleb approaching with Scampi on his lead. My heart leapt and heat flowed through me. Caleb hung back until I’d finished my conversation.
‘I thought you were working this morning,’ I said when the family moved off and Caleb joined me.
‘My client’s poorly and they’ve postponed, so Scampi and I thought we’d add to your visitor numbers for the day.’
‘You’ve never paid, have you?’
‘Your mam didn’t want me to but I insisted and I’ve also got my eye on a cake for later.’
‘What sort?’
He scrunched up his nose, his cheeks flushing. ‘You’ll laugh.’
‘I won’t.’
‘A butterfly cake.’
I had to press my lips together to stifle my amusement.
‘I knew you’d laugh! My grandma used to make them for me when I was little and I’ve been a sucker for them ever since.’
‘I hear you! Seriously, Caleb, I love fairy cakes of all varieties. The only downside is they’re not big enough. I need at least two.’
‘Same here. I’ll admit to asking your mam to keep three aside for me. Anyway, I won’t keep you for long as I know you have visitors to talk to but—’
My phone began ringing and I glanced at the screen and declined the call. ‘It’s my mam. I’ll call her back in a minute.’
‘I thought you’d want to know that I’ve just had the test results back for—’
My phone rang again and I apologised as I answered it. ‘Hi, Mam, I’m in the middle of something. I’ll call you back in one minute. Bye.’ Hanging up, I asked Caleb to continue.
‘It’s great news. Rowan has a clean bill of health.’
‘That’s fantastic! Thank you so much!’
I felt so relieved that I flung my arms round him and hugged him tightly.
It was meant to be a quick hug of gratitude but he wrapped his arms around me too and it felt so good to be held.
He smelled amazing – some sort of coconut shampoo blended with possibly a lime shower gel and I closed my eyes for a moment, loving the feel of his cheek against my skin.
What would it feel like to have his soft lips pressed against mine?
I pictured it in my mind and longed for it in reality. Perhaps…
‘Is this a bad time?’
At the sound of the familiar voice, I released Caleb and stared in shock at the man standing behind him.
‘Laurie?’