Chapter Twelve #2
He expected her to chastise him sharply.
From the corner of his eye, he saw her turn toward him with a deep scowl.
But, as he casually relaxed his back to the wall behind him, she released a breath and eased her taut muscles, tipping her head back once again.
Her sigh of subtle surrender lingered in the warm humidity of the conservatory.
This was the closest he’d been to her. He could feel the press of her hip and thigh against his, and the brush of her shoulder. He could hear her steady breaths and smell the faint essence of violet that drifted from her skin.
Violet water was a common scent for women. It was nothing exotic or particularly sensual, but on her, it took on a subtle, mysterious quality. Shadowed and feminine. Quiet but strong.
He cleared his throat. “You’re very clever, you know.”
“Yes, I know.”
He chuckled, but kept the sound to a low hum between them. “You’re intelligent and bold and brave.”
He could feel her discomfort growing with each compliment until she turned her head to eye him suspiciously. Edmund accepted her wariness with an easy smile even though it angered him that she might have heard so few compliments that it would distress her in such a way.
“Yet, I suspect you’ve no idea how desirable you are.”
Her jaw tightened and she rolled her eyes away from him. “Why do you bring every conversation back to that?”
“To what?”
“Desire.”
Edmund didn’t realize it was something he did, but he didn’t deny it. With a shrug, he replied, “Desire is simple. Attraction and sensual yearning are easy. Easily understood and easily satisfied.”
“Does complexity frighten you?”
He started, staring at her as he considered her question in earnest, then he answered truthfully. “I suppose it might.”
She nodded but said nothing else, as if his answer didn’t require further exposition.
Odd, since he wasn’t sure he completely understood it.
He cleared his throat. “We’ve gotten off track.”
“Have we?”
“Yes. I was trying to explain that you have no reason to feel like you might disappoint anyone.”
She closed her eyes for a moment and he thought she might make some attempt to avoid replying. But then she lifted her lashes to meet his gaze. “I know.”
Her reply confused him for a moment, making him think he’d completely misunderstood her somehow.
“And yet it happens,” she continued. “I realized when I was rather young that I did not fit the mold my mother and most others wished me to fill. I hated my lessons on embroidery and pianoforte and flower-arranging and snuck into the schoolroom to listen to my brothers’ tutor whenever possible.
I wanted to learn Latin and study ancient wars and debate the great philosophers.
As soon as my mother discovered what I was doing, she sent me to take my lessons with my cousin.
In truth, it was one of the best things she ever did for me. ”
Her voice faded and she seemed to drift into a thoughtful reverie.
After a moment, Edmund chuckled. The sound brought her attention swiftly back to him.
“You would’ve been shocked if you’d been present for any of my lessons,” he declared with humor.
She shifted on the bench to angle a bit toward him. “I’m shocked just knowing you had lessons,” she taunted with a tilted smirk. “I simply cannot imagine you as a young schoolboy, seated quietly at your tutor’s knee.”
Edmund laughed. “That’s because it never happened. I spent me boyhood working from sun up to sundown. When I turned twelve, me mum decided I was finally old enough to run the streets at night with the other lads of the neighborhood.”
Memories of those wild, adventurous days filled him with a warm nostalgia and he couldn’t help smiling. It wasn’t until he caught sight of Lady Lydia’s shocked expression that he realized he’d slipped into his East End accent just a bit.
He laughed. “I wasn’t always the posh gent ye see now,” he quipped.
“I was a scamp of the streets, doing whatever work was available to help me mum and afford a bit of fun. I reckon I woulda been content with that life if Mr. Pontifort hadn’t come knocking on our door one day to say I was suddenly a lord of the realm.
” He shook his head with another chuckle.
“Ma slammed the door in his face three times before he convinced her to take a listen. I’d always known Da had some lords somewhere in his extended family, but it hadn’t been a concern to me. ”
He paused to glance at the woman beside him and noticed her wide-eyed shock hadn’t dissipated.
“You’ve got to be joking,” she muttered.
“You can’t imagine the Herculean task Mr. Pontifort had in trying to turn me into an acceptable aristocrat.
I thought for sure I’d be called a fraud once I stepped out in society.
” He shrugged then flashed a grin. “But I learned quick enough that there are ways to distract people from worrying too much about your manners.”
A glimmer entered her gaze. “I suppose men like you are given significant license to be bad in a variety of ways.” She tilted her head as her brows dipped. “So, your hedonism is just an act to distract from your background.”
“Of course not,” he countered swiftly, meeting her dark gaze. “I promise, I’m as wicked as they come.”