Chapter Thirteen
Tingling fire danced through Lydia’s senses.
The man was too damned potent. A few simple words. A tilt of his irreverent mouth. The glimmer of knowledge and confidence in his eyes. And her entire body lit up.
She did not appreciate how easily he flipped her physical reactions into opposition with her rational mind. It made her feel as though she didn’t have full control of herself. It was frustrating and utterly thrilling at the same time.
Was that why she’d hoped he might follow her when she’d left the ballroom?
“Why are you telling me this?” she asked.
The moonlit darkness of the conservatory and the scents of flowers and fruit trees contributed to a slightly surreal atmosphere.
Private and sensual. His smile was slow, his gaze glinting as his attention dropped briefly over her form before rebounding to her face.
Then he shrugged. “I just wanted you to know something true about me.”
There was a genuineness to his voice she wasn’t sure she’d ever heard before. But when he spoke again, he’d returned full force to the rake, with a knowing glint in his amber eyes and a rough-textured tone designed to trigger heat in the deepest parts of her.
“Now, it’s your turn,” he murmured.
“What?”
“Tell me a truth about you.”
Lydia closed her eyes and drew the balmy greenhouse air deep into her lungs.
A truth. About her. Why did that seem like an impossible task?
It shouldn’t be. She’d been trying to live honestly for years, refusing to shape herself into something she’s not, refusing to revere things that had no personal value to her.
She’d been practicing her truth for a long time.
It should be easy to pick something and just say it.
As she released her breath, she acknowledged that the problem was in the fact that the one truth she wanted to say, was something she absolutely shouldn’t tell him.
Humor bubbled up in her chest. She released it in a soft chuckle.
He turned to her questioningly and she met his curious gaze, flickering with gold in the moonlight.
“I am repressed,” she said, then laughed again when his eyebrows arched in surprise. “You were right,” she continued. Now that she’d admitted it, the rest came easier. “There is an entire world of experience I’ve never known.”
“A world you’d like to explore?” he asked.
Her cheeks warmed but she refused to be embarrassed. “I suppose I never considered it a possibility. The risks are great. And there was never anyone…” Her voice trailed off. She couldn’t say the last part. But she didn’t need to.
He grinned—a flash of wolfish teeth in the darkness. “To tempt you as I have,” he provided.
Lydia rolled her eyes.
His smile softened and his tone lowered, sending delicate tingling chills over her skin. “You know I would be a perfect partner in your pursuit of this previously inaccessible knowledge.”
“I’m certain you’re right,” she replied in a husky whisper. “But at what cost to me?”
He lifted his hand slowly toward her face. Lydia remained still and unflinching, though her gaze held his intently. She would not blush and glance away. If he wished to attempt seduction, it would have to be with her full awareness.
The light touch of his fingertips was surprisingly soft and gentle.
He carefully brushed a wisp of hair away from her temple, then drew his fingertips down along the edge of her jaw to the tip of her chin.
He brushed his thumb in a deliberate caress just beneath the line of her bottom lip, his gaze dropping to follow the movement.
Lydia’s stomach clenched and a forceful thrumming pushed through her veins.
Staring at her mouth as if he wished to worship the curves of her lips, he whispered throatily, “No cost. Only rewards.”
The derisive sound she issued caught in her throat and sounded embarrassingly weak.
“Men receive the rewards, my lord. Women receive consequences and ruination.”
Something flickered brightly in his eyes as he lifted his gaze back to hers, lowering his hand back to rest atop his thigh. For a moment, his expression tensed, as if with some contrary emotion, before he shielded it with another sensual smile.
“Not if we’re both very clever and very careful.”
She tilted her head. “And what would you be getting out of this arrangement?”
His expression softened and his eyes darkened. “Isn’t it obvious?”
A shiver of anticipation and delicate excitement ran through her.
Clearly, what he wanted was her.
Feeling as though she balanced precariously on a windblown precipice, Lydia took a moment to study him.
His eyes sparked. His expression remained irreverent and subtly wicked.
His body appeared relaxed and at ease on the bench beside her, but she could feel an underlying readiness.
A physical awareness and confidence that, honestly, appealed to her a great deal.
And though she hated to admit it, his argument was somewhat sound.
She didn’t want to think that he’d managed to seduce her by promising to further her education in a topic not allowed young women.
But he may have done exactly that.
Damn.
When his grin widened, she realized she’d uttered the curse aloud.
Well, he’d been right about one thing. Lydia Rose Balcomb was no coward. She’d never have made the decision to sneak into her brothers’ schoolroom if she had been.
“You’re quite the manipulator,” she muttered. “Using my yearning for knowledge and liberation against me.”
His expression was unrepentant. “I like to think I’m using it for you. Is it working?”
She sighed and whispered, “Apparently.”
As his eyes widened, she shifted in her seat, sitting tall as she turned toward him, her knees bumping his thigh. Extending her right hand, she arched a brow.
“I accept your offer.”
Clearly, he’d not expected her to agree so quickly.
His shock was delightful, and a slightly smirking smile curved her mouth.
He recovered with astonishing swiftness, however, sparking a note of disappointment before he also straightened and turned toward her.
Taking her hand in his, he slipped his palm warmly against hers, turning her hand to bring her knuckles to his lips.
It should’ve been a ridiculous act. If any other man had thought to kiss her hand with the same slow deliberate focus and the same gleam in his eyes, she likely would’ve broken into a laugh.
But this was the Earl of Darlington, renowned rake, skilled seducer. And soon to be her…lover?
It defied rational understanding. Yet, even though her body tingled and tightened at the thought, she allowed herself to embrace this new journey of discovery and education into a realm she’d honestly never expected to pursue.
When he lifted his head, he flashed a roguish grin. “You won’t regret this.”
She tilted her head and narrowed her eyes. “Isn’t that what they all say?”
His brows dipped into a feigned scowl as his hand tightened on hers. “You’ve received this offer before?”
“Not I, but a thousand other women from a thousand other rakes throughout history. Foolish women trusting a man’s promise to protect their reputation and well-being.”
The scowl on his face turned earnest. “I will protect you.” His words sounded like a vow.
Her smile was tight. “I will protect myself. If you don’t decide to outright betray me, I shall be fine.”
The way his face froze gave her a moment of pause, but the prick of wariness quickly passed as he drew her hand closer and pressed her palm flat to his chest.
“Shall we start with your first lesson as a means of sealing our agreement?”
His gaze fell to her mouth as he leaned toward her and Lydia realized in a flash that he intended to kiss her. Right then. In that moment. With no preparation and no warning.
Panic had her tensing as she pulled her shoulders back. Her eyes went wide. “I don’t—”
“You will,” he interrupted as his other hand came up to cup her nape as he held her in place to accept his kiss. Even so, a moment before his lips touched hers—with his breath wafting against her throat in a gentle, warm breeze—he met her gaze and paused.
“Just a kiss. My lips touching yours,” he added in a graveled tone that lowered with each word. “A symbol of trust. Will you accept?”
Lydia took a deep, slow breath through her nose, acknowledging that she wanted this.
She wanted to understand this unexpected desire he inspired and experience the kind of passion poets wrote about.
And if she were going to explore the subject with anyone, Lord Darlington was the best option for an expert tutor.
Parting her lips to release her breath, she nodded.
With a strange, harsh sound in his throat, he immediately pulled her to him. His lips fell to hers with more intensity than she expected. Not that she’d thought much about it, but those rare times when she had, she’d imagined her first kiss would be one of delicate testing, a sweet brushing cress.
This was not that.
His mouth claimed. The pressure felt almost bruising at first, until he tilted his head just a bit and she felt the smooth, velvety friction of his lips over hers.
Sensations spiraled from that friction, and she gasped as a tremor danced through her core.
With one hand still gripping her nape, he reached his other hand across her lap to palm her opposite hip.
As he pulled her closer, she dropped her hand to his thigh, thinking to brace herself and hold herself steady.
But the intimate warmth of solid muscle beneath her palm invigorated the fire rushing through her.
She barely resisted the urge to curl her fingernails into him like a cat.
He withdrew the pressure of his mouth slowly and with obvious reluctance, pausing to deliberately caress her bottom lip with his before allowing just a breath of space between them.
Lydia opened her eyes to meet his shining, amber gaze. Her breath expelled on a weighted sigh, causing him to smile.