37. Chapter 37
Chapter 37
WESTON
M ahogany pressed against my fingers as I leaned heavily on the desk in the boardroom. My colleagues would join me in several minutes. The tall windows draped with exquisite curtains painted a picture of grandeur, but they couldn’t distract from the longing and regret gripping my heart. I hated the way things ended with Becky. My initial response to the revelation of her debt was more a reflection of my own fears than a judgment of her.
The days since she’d left had stretched into an eternity, each sunrise and sunset a reminder of the gap she’d left in my world. It wasn’t just that I missed her; I felt a deep-seated need to grow, to be better. For God. For myself. For her .
I’d poured my heart out to her in several emails. But I’d heard nothing back. I didn’t blame her; I’d been an idiot. The thought had crossed my mind to call her or even go visit her in person. But she obviously needed space, and I could at least give her that. Besides, each time I thought of reaching out, the image of her bright eyes and warm smile stopped me. I needed to be more than what I was, to become someone deserving of her radiant spirit. It wasn’t out of doubt for my feelings; I knew with unwavering certainty that I wanted Becky in my life. But first, I had to mend the parts of myself that were broken.
The path to self-improvement was rocky, but the thought of her made every challenge bearable. In my heart, I hoped that in time Becky would still be willing to take a chance on ‘us’. And when that day came, I’d hold on to her with everything I had, never letting go.
As I dove deeper into my faith and personal growth, I felt a profound change taking root. It started with a humble request to my Bible study group—pray for me. It was a big step for someone like me, who usually kept his walls high and sturdy.
During this time, I also sought advice from a church counselor. Our sessions were eye-opening, connecting me with wisdom that echoed what Brenda and my mother had said. I’d been led astray by my own emotions, allowing grief to steer my life. My sorrow had so consumed my focus that I’d neglected to look to God, to see the other good things He was working on. This realization was humbling. I’d arrogantly thought I knew better than God.
Grief for my father and Jared still often tried to drag me back into a dark abyss. I’d shouldered their loss, irrationally feeling responsible, as if I owed a penance for their deaths. But my mother’s words rang true—I wasn’t in control of their destinies, just as I wasn’t in control of my own. Everything was in God’s hands. I was learning to submit to His will, to trust in His greater plan, even though it scared me. His design for my life was far superior to anything I could imagine, and I was finally ready to embrace it with gratitude.
And Mom had hit another truth—connection was vital. Becky, with her gentle spirit, offered a glimpse of what life could be when you let others in. My grief had been a fortress, isolating me from the world’s embrace. Now, it was time to break free, to live the life God had envisioned for me. A life with people and connection.
As the threads of my life wove together once more, I revisited bridges I’d thought were long since burned. Becky had thrown a birthday party for me last year that was, to put it mildly, a disaster. Yet, in her endearingly overly generous way, she’d reached out to old friends of mine, rekindling connections. In my grief, I’d let those connections slip through my fingers.
In the months since the party, I’d ignored the tentative messages from those once close to me, but two voices called to me in particular, urging me to respond. The first was Aunt Clara; over the last few days, we’d had several much-needed lengthy conversations that had brought us both some welcome closure regarding Jared.
Then there was Noah, my childhood neighbor. We had shared a bond so strong it transcended mere friendship. He was a year my junior, yet in many ways, he was the brother I never had. I vividly remembered the day he turned nineteen, his eyes alight with the innocent glow of first love as he confessed his feelings for Darcy. In the absence of my father, I’d ignorantly played the role of an overprotective parent. I’d dismissed his heartfelt revelations and forbidden him from pursuing my sister, causing a rift that led to his leaving Hilton Head Island. My heart ached with regret for the friend I had lost on account of my inability to navigate my fractured world.
Reaching out to him after all these years, I’d discovered he was not doing as well as I’d hoped. On the surface, Noah was thriving; he had climbed to the peak of his career, was fit and healthy, and not surprisingly, he had a boatload of friends. But my gut read the unspoken, sorrowful words between his lines of success. Despite this, reconnecting with him was good. Becky’s unintentional bridge-building, though flawed in execution, had somehow rekindled these vital connections, repairing relationships that meant so much to me.
My thoughts about the future and the prospect of shifting my career to engineering were still muddled. But one step at a time.
For now, the present called. As my colleagues began to fill the room, offering courteous nods and smiles, I prepared to unveil the company’s vision for the upcoming year. Just as I was about to speak, the ring of my phone on the table disturbed my concentration. Glancing at the screen, I saw it was my sister. She wouldn’t call me during work unless it was important, so I excused myself from the room.
“Sorry, ladies and gentlemen, I need to take this,” I said, before slipping out of the boardroom.
I answered the call and listened intently as Darcy’s voice came through. “Weston, Becky didn’t get your letters,” she said, her voice tinged with regret. “I just spoke to her, and I think she is still in love with you. ”
I couldn’t believe what I was hearing. My mind raced as I tried to process her words. “Wait. What do you mean you just spoke to her?”
“I flew to Atlanta to watch one of my student’s kickboxing fights, and I visited Becky while I was there,” she said, “I know I overstepped, but I just hate seeing you so sad and I thought maybe I could see where her head was at.”
My heart almost stopped beating with how long Darcy was taking to get things out. “And? What did she say?” I asked urgently, hoping against hope that she’d be open to the idea of ‘us’.
“She was hosting a garage sale to raise funds for her debt,” Darcy said. “I think that’s about as wholesome as it gets.”
“Oh Becky,” I whispered, feeling a surge of love and tenderness for the woman I had grown to care about so deeply. “Never mind about the garage sale. What did she say about me?”
“I think she may love you,” Darcy said, her voice softening. “And if you don’t chase after her, I might disown you.”
Relief washed over me as I heard her words. A smile unknowingly curved my lips as I leaned against the cool wall. “That means more than you know, Darce. Seriously.”
“Like I said, I don’t think she’s received any of your emails. Are you sure you have the right address?”
“I got it from Gray, so I don’t know.”
There was a brief pause. “Well, I’ll let you return to the corporate battlefield. I didn’t mean to interrupt.”
“Darce, from you, it’s never an interruption. Thanks for the call. Talk soon, okay?” I replied, feeling like the room was brighter for our conversation.
As I approached the boardroom, I already knew what I had to do. Continuing with the presentation didn’t sit right with me; my heart just wasn’t in it. I had to fight for what I really wanted—Becky—and a career I was truly passionate about.
I pushed open the door. The room was filled with people, all waiting for me to begin.
“I’m sorry, everyone,” I began, my voice shaking slightly. “I have cherished being highly involved in the company my dad was so proud of. However, I regret to inform you I won’t be able to maintain my position here at Trust Insured any longer. I’ll help transfer my role to my replacement, but I can’t finish this presentation.” My hand brushed against the edges of my notes, the words I’d prepared now irrelevant .
The room was a blur of surprised faces, a mix of confusion and concern. I paused, looking around at my colleagues, people I had worked with for years. “This company, what my dad built, it means the world to me. But it’s time for me to move on.”
There was silence. I could see the shock, the disappointment, but also glimpses of understanding in their eyes. “I know this is sudden, and I’m truly sorry for any inconvenience my departure might cause.”
My thoughts turned to my dad, how much he loved this company, and how I longed to make him proud. But I’d come to realize that he probably had a deeper desire for me—that I embrace God’s plan and fully live out the purpose for which I was created.
“As I step down, I want to assure you all that I will do everything in my power to make this transition as smooth as possible.” Taking a deep breath, I said, “Thank you for the opportunity, for the experiences, and the memories. I will cherish them always.”
The room remained silent, and I held my breath. Then, one of my dad’s oldest advisors spoke up. “It’s about time, son,” he said, a smile on his face. “You were never meant for a desk job. Your dad would be proud of you.”
I nodded, grateful for his support. His words, simple yet sincere, cut through the tension that had held me in its grip just moments before. I could feel the gazes of the other board members, their nods of agreement rippling through the room like a gentle wave of reassurance.
As I left the office, Darcy’s words replayed in my mind, awakening a dormant ember of hope. Perhaps Becky hadn’t dismissed the idea of ‘us’ after all. The very thought made my pulse quicken. Could she see past my rough edges and embrace the man I was trying to become? I needed to find her. I longed to see those understanding eyes and hear her reassuring voice. With every step I took, the uncertainty lifted, replaced by the warmth of possibility. Becky was out there, and I was on a mission to let her know just how much I loved her.