Chapter 21
Chapter Twenty-One
Ilya
I’d showered and ordered breakfast by the time Daisy appeared, carrying Alec in her arms. She let him cling to her for a second, not looking at either me or Marguerite as we sat together eating, and I watched as her lips moved, but I couldn’t tell what she was saying to him.
"Now, Alec." This time I did hear her. She wasn’t shouting at him, but her voice was stern. It didn’t take a genius to know what they had been talking about in her room for the last thirty minutes. "Please don’t be rude."
He tilted his face up to her, his little face screwed up, and I thought he was going to argue back, but then he nodded, and she dropped him to his feet.
"Come and sit down, Alec." Easily, I pulled out the chair next to me. Where he always sat. "Oh, I’m sorry." Finally, I turned my attention back to Daisy, so different from the elegant woman opposite me in her jeans. "I can’t remember if I introduced you to each other. Daisy looks after Alec for me when I can’t. She’s—" I paused, looking at the face that I would have burnt the world for, and took a deep breath.
"She’s an old friend. Daisy, this is Marguerite. "
The two women leant forward, their hands meeting in a polite shake.
"It’s a pleasure to see you again, Marguerite," Daisy began to say.
"Marguerite is my fiancée."
Daisy froze. The blood rushed from her face at my words. Wildly, she looked at me. I caught her gaze and held it.
"Fiancée?" she whispered, her hand still grasped.
A million emotions swept across her face, and she was powerless to hide even a single one.
I knew what she was thinking. That last night, when I had crawled into her room and made love to her, gently and softly, that something had changed between us. And maybe it had. Just not in the way she had thought.
Last night I had come to the conclusion that I did love her. I would always love her, but love wasn’t enough. I liked seeing her pay more.
"You’re hurting my hand," Marguerite said coldly, and I knew I wasn’t the only one who had noticed Daisy's reaction to the news.
"Sorry." Quickly, Daisy dropped her hand and rubbed her palm against her denim-clad leg. "What wonderful news. I didn’t realize you had known each other very long." She was looking straight at Marguerite.
"Well, sometimes you just know when you meet someone, right?" Marguerite said, her voice turning colder and colder by the second. "I can tell by your face that you are happy that Ilya finally found someone worthy of him. You being an old friend and all."
Daisy’s face crumbled for a split second.
It seemed Marguerite had managed to hurt her with just a few sharp words, easily and efficiently—far more effectively than anything I had ever done.
"I am ecstatic. Congratulations to both of you." She nodded her head once. "I’ll leave you to your—family," she seemed to choke on the word, "breakfast."
She had taken a step back when Alec called out after her. "Are we going to the park today?"
Daisy froze, her eyes drifting to me.
Sighing, I shook my head. "Not today, Alec. I want you to come out with me and Marguerite today."
"To the park?" he asked hopefully.
"Not today. We have to get you fitted for a very special suit, and—"
"Why don’t we let Alexander go out with the nanny today?
" Marguerite looked at Alec’s chocolate-covered lips and fingers, her nose wrinkling in disgust. Then she must have noticed the look on my face because she quickly picked up a napkin and wiped the corner of my son’s mouth.
"And I’m sure Alexander would much prefer to go to the park than hang out with us. Isn’t that right?"
Alec nodded his head eagerly. "Can I, Papa? Can I go with Daisy instead?"
I wanted my son to be part of this new chapter of my life because, after all, he was my life, but maybe Marguerite had a point. The stores we had to go to would have him bored to tears in minutes.
"That’s fine with me. If Daisy agrees?" I lifted my eyes to her.
"That’s fine with me, Ilya," she said softly. "I love spending time with Alec, and maybe you can both join us later?"
She was trying to be polite. My heart gave a pang of guilt, but I thrust that feeling down. I would not let myself feel sorry for her. Daisy had brought this on herself.
"I’m sure Marguerite has things to arrange for the engagement party tomorrow, but I will join you both later."
I didn’t get to join them at the park. In fact, by the time I got away from Marguerite, Alec was in bed, and Daisy had closed her bedroom door.
The next day was the same but worse. My whole apartment was a hive of activity as decorators and caterers filled the space.
I saw Daisy and Alec briefly before they disappeared into his room to play and didn’t appear until much later.
And honestly, I wanted nothing more than to disappear with them and close the door to all the racket.
"My love?"
I started at the sound of Marguerite's voice. "Hi." I turned to her, tearing my eyes away from that closed bedroom door.
"Do you miss Alexander? Oh, my God, you live with him every day. He’ll be fine with his nanny."
She tipped her head back and smiled at me, but I couldn’t shake the feeling that her smile didn’t reach her eyes. It looked as if she thought my son was a nuisance.
My brows drew together, and my patience was wearing thin. Alec was the most important person in my life. If we were going to move forward, he had to hold the same place in her heart too.
"You seem far away." Reaching up, she placed her hand on my cheek. "Everything is ready. Doesn’t it look amazing?"
"Sure." I shrugged. I didn’t bother to turn to look around. Really, it didn’t matter to me what color the flowers were or if the champagne tower worked. I just wanted this day to end.
"I am going to go and get ready now." Lifting herself up on her tiptoes, she brushed her painted mouth to the corner of my mouth. "And I’ll be wearing something special for you under my dress tonight," she whispered huskily. I didn’t react. It didn’t matter if she was wearing lingerie of pure gold.
I wouldn't touch her tonight. There would be a night where I needed to, but that wasn’t today.
"Maybe you should put Alec and his nanny into a hotel tonight so we can—"
I cut her off sharply. "Alec is part of the package, Marguerite. If you cannot accept him, then this engagement goes no further."
"I love him like he is my own," she pouted prettily.
She was lying, of course. Marguerite didn’t have one maternal bone in her body. So I narrowed my eyes.
"Of course he is welcome," she said quickly. "Of course I want him to be part of this, but I also want my night to be perfect."
I stared her down. "He will be there. He has a swimming lesson now, but after that, he will be at our side. And we will be a family." I added a note of finality to my voice.
The tip of her nose wrinkled, but she smiled anyway, and it just went to prove one thing to me. This was wrong. Marguerite was wrong for us. She wasn’t the kind of woman I wanted acting as a stepmother to my child. Maybe I should get engaged to another woman instead?
"Of course. I will see you at nine." Again she aimed her lips towards my mouth, and I gave her my cheek instead.
God, none of this felt right. Being engaged to Marguerite only made me feel irritated and worn down. I should end it. I should—I took a step towards the elevator and was about to tell her it was over when I heard a door behind me open.
Turning, I found Daisy hovering in the doorway, her cheeks flushed. "Sorry," she mumbled. "I thought everyone had left and wanted to," her eyes swept over my face, and she took a hasty step back. "Never mind." She went to shut the door.
"I haven’t seen you much today," I blurted before I could stop myself. Daisy froze. Her eyes were the only thing that moved as she swept them over me.
"I tried to stay out of the way because of," she gestured around the space. "I know you are busy with your engagement party." She swallowed hard around the last words.
I couldn’t blame her for that; I was having a hard time saying the word as well.
"Yeah. Are you hungry?"
She hadn’t eaten all day as far as I was aware. Not that I was keeping tabs on her. I just seemed to be hyper-aware of her every movement at all times.
"I’ll just grab something and—"
I had moved across the floor towards her before she had finished the sentence, and my hands closed around her waist to jerk her towards me.
"Ilya, don’t do this." Tilting her face up to me, she whispered.
"Do what?" I couldn’t help it; my hands stayed on her hips. "Don’t give you what you really want?"
The look she gave me was meant to be outraged, but she could never hide the heat in her eyes from me.
"What I need is some food." She pushed uselessly at my chest. "That’s what I want."
The words had barely left her mouth before my mouth was on her jawline. Flicking her hair over her shoulders, I let my tongue travel downwards, tracing the thin blue lines of her throat.
The fisted hands on my chest flattened, and I knew she could feel the pounding of my heart under my shirt. I didn’t even care that she could. I wanted her to know how she made me feel because I wanted her to feel the same way.
"Is that so?" One hand on the small of her back, I let the other one drift upward. My fingertips skimming the underside of her breast. "Are you telling me you don’t want my hands on you right now, Daisy?"
"Alec could come down—"
"Upstairs having his swim lesson. We have two hours before I have to get ready." I edged her backwards, back into her room.
"You’re marrying someone else," she whispered, but there was no real fight left in her voice. Lips half-parted, she lifted her chin up to meet my eyes. "Tonight is your engagement—"
I couldn’t stand to hear those words from her lips. I didn’t need reminding of what tonight was. It was all I could think about.
The fact that deep down I knew I was making a massive mistake.