25. Chapter Twenty-Five
Chapter Twenty-Five
Ryker
“ K leio’s tits, Ryk. The mating bond has driven you insane. You can’t just jump into the Rip.” Hakoa was standing over me with a look of outrage.
“I think the Rip is a way Gods can send people to other realms. Like with the contestants of the last Trial. The Gods are the only ones who know what happens there. I don’t really know what else to do,” I said, standing up from the chair and leaning against the table with my arms crossed over my chest.
“How about not going in the Godsdamn Rip?” he asked pointedly.
Malina remained quiet, her eyes darting back and forth between us as we spoke.
“I’m a Worthy of Xareus. If I go in there, he could send me to Kya. I’ve been loyal to him for centuries. His task for me is to reveal the darkness. What if that’s what this is? What if it’s my fate to discover first-hand what the Rip is and return to unveil its true nature?” I had thought of it over and over. It made sense.
I had spent three hundred years trying to decipher Xareus’ task for me, and while I did my duty of protecting Oryn, I had always felt as if I was failing him in that aspect. This had to be his ultimate purpose for me. And in the meantime, I could find Kya and bring her back.
“You’re just guessing,” Hakoa argued.
“Of course I’m guessing.” I pushed off the table. “But it’s worth the risk. She’s worth the risk.”
“What if you’re wrong?” Malina asked.
“What?” I snapped my eyes to her. She was already skeptical, I didn’t need her encouraging Hakoa against me even more.
“Hakoa is right. What if it doesn’t work like you think it does? What if it’s only because it was Daegel who took Kya that it worked like that? He’s a dark wielder. It could be that his magic works differently, and he has that power.”
I didn’t respond.
She had a point. I didn’t know how it worked. As Theron said, only the Gods knew. And possibly Daegel. But I wasn’t even sure they had gone back to his realm—just that it wasn’t ours.
I stared off distantly.
What if Daegel can go back and forth? Could he return here? Would he? He was after Kya, but he was also searching for the book. Which is still in my possession. He could try to come find it again. There’s something in there he needs, otherwise he wouldn’t have been searching for it in the first place. I need to find out what it is.
Hakoa sighed. “What do the books say about other known mates who fell in?”
His voice brought me out of my thoughts.
“That their bond was severed entirely. Their tether was gone. Not even a shred was left.” I traced my fingers along the pages of the book in front of me. “Which is why I know this is different. Our bond is still there. I know she’s on the other side of it. ”
“And what about the Rip?” Malina asked. “What do the books say about that? Or what about your Spirit? Have you asked him?”
“The books don’t say anything we don’t already know.” I glowered. “Just about how it was formed by the fall of Odes and it’s an endless chasm. And of course I asked Theron. He’s the one who told me that only the Gods know.”
“Then maybe you’re not meant to,” Hakoa said with a hard expression.
“I—” I began but he cut me off.
“What if she’s trying to get back?” he asked.
“I know she is.” She would be doing everything she could to come back to me, like I was doing everything I could to find her.
“Exactly. What if she does get back and you’re dead? Who does that help? If you die, it’ll only hurt her more.”
I hadn’t wanted to hit Hakoa this bad since our last squabble. He was my oldest and closest friend, but he didn’t understand.
“I’m done arguing for the night,” I stated, and walked away into the darkness of the library.
I couldn’t just sit here and hope Kya would find her way back to me. I needed to find her. But I didn’t know how. I didn’t know what more to do. They were right, jumping into the Rip was a terrible idea and it wasn’t as if I wanted to—I wasn’t even sure I’d be able to. But I was driven so intensely by the need to have her back it was the only thing I could think of.
I hated not knowing anything. I felt helpless. I didn’t know if she was okay. I didn’t know how to find her. I didn’t know what to fucking do, just that I had to do something, anything—everything.
With only a sliver of moonslight to guide me, I continued to aimlessly walk through the rows and rows of books of Morah. A twinge of sorrow hit me as I thought of Kya running through the towering aisles of the library she had called home, of how much time she spent here growing up, and how ironic it was I was here and she wasn’t.
It felt wrong being here without her. Not just Morah, but this whole realm. I was meant to be at her side no matter what. She made her choice to sacrifice herself, but Gods be damned, I wasn’t going to let that happen.
I found myself walking over the bridge that overlooked the lower levels. I stopped in the middle and rested my arms on the side that looked out through the obsidian wall. Something didn’t seem right, and it took me a moment to realize it was because the crack that once extended along the entire length was repaired. Knowing what I knew now, I made the assumption Daegel was the one who was responsible for it. When he was either looking for the dark book or for Kya.
I admired the seamless restoration for a few moments before I heard quiet steps approaching behind me. I didn’t even have to turn my head to know who it was.
“When did you fix it?” I asked Nikan without looking at him.
“I didn’t do it alone,” he said as he came up next to me and leaned his hip on the railing with his head turned toward the glass. “The restoration started before you came to get me and Malina, but it wasn’t completed until about a week ago.”
I nodded absently. “How’d you do it?”
I had no idea what made me decide to talk with Nikan about such a mundane thing. Perhaps I just needed to think about anything else at that moment.
“A lot of trial and error. Ultimately, we figured out it requires the collaboration of each of the common elemental wielders at the same time.” He shrugged and I glanced at him from the corner of my eye.
“Yeah? How’s that?” I asked, only half paying attention.
“Fire wielders melted the damaged area while terbis wielders re-formed it. Air wielders had to create pressure while the water wielders cooled it quickly.” He blew out a breath. “Thousands of years and the threat of its destruction later, and the world finally figured out how Morah was created.”
I hummed in response.
“Have you seen Eamon? I got a message that he wanted to see me but I had been tracking down a source and when I got back, he was gone. I guess he went to Bhara,” Nikan said.
“I haven’t seen him,” I lied. At my prompting, he had gone to Bhara to meet with the Sages—probably to warn them of possible disturbances between the Nations.
Nikan and I remained silent for several minutes as we stared out into the night, absorbing the peace while it lasted.
“Did you talk to Mal?” he asked.
I nodded. “Yeah. Hakoa brought her down to see me. I told her Kya’s alive, but I’m not sure she believed me.”
“She’s taken it really hard and she blames herself. She’s been on demid, I don’t know for how long. I just found out tonight.” He ran a hand down his face. “I don’t know how to help her out of this. But I’m guessing she was on it to avoid dealing with Kya’s death. And now that she knows Kya’s not dead, maybe she’ll stop.”
“Or you could make her stop.” I shrugged one shoulder. “If she’s getting it on her Roav missions, just stop her from taking any jobs for a while. I’ve heard you don’t have a problem being authoritative over your sister’s lives.”
“I don’t control them,” he hissed. “I push them to make the right and smart decisions but I never force them to do anything. And Malina hasn’t been on any missions. I’ve been taking her and Kya’s jobs so she can have the time to get better. I’ve also been putting money aside for her so she doesn’t find herself starving one day with nothing.” He closed his eyes and let out a deep exhale. “I’m just trying to protect her. That’s all I’ve ever done for them.”
I turned to face him fully.
He looked utterly spent but held himself as if he wasn’t. It was the weariness in his eyes that gave him away. He had taken on the load of three Roav since Kya was gone and Malina had her own shit she was going through.
I had never taken the time to truly appreciate Nikan’s role in Kya’s life. He had raised and guided her just as much as Eamon had. He was also responsible for her Roav training and teaching her how to defend herself. If it wasn’t for that, she may not have survived the Trial. He watched over her, protected her. He had helped shape who Kya was.
I owed him more respect than I had given him.
I nodded and swallowed back any previous discontent I’d had for him. I didn’t want Kya to come back to find her family fucked up and broken. The least I could do was appreciate the people my wife loved.
“If either of you ever need anything, just…let me know. And take it easy on Hakoa. You’re brutal to the males your sisters are with,” I huffed. “He’ll be good to her. Let him help.”
He pursed his lips. “Alright,” he grumbled, then gestured toward the floor below. “Are you headed back down?”
“No, I’m done for the night. I’ll pick back up in the morning when the Scholars are awake.”
Nikan pushed off the railing. “Well, if you ever need anything, let me know. I’ll do whatever I can to help Kya.”
“I appreciate that.” I nodded.
With that, we parted ways.
Seeing as it was the most convenient place to sleep, I made my way to Kya’s rooms. Everything was exactly the same as the last time we were here. I inhaled deeply. Her scent of lavender and eucalyptus flooded my senses, and it only made me long for her even more. That was the real reason I wanted to stay in her rooms. I wanted to feel closer to her, smell her, feel the essence of her past within the walls. Her clothes still hung in the wardrobe, her soaps still sat on the edge of the tub. The memory of her was still present from her years spent here.
One look at the bed had me aching to lay next to her. So much so I decided to sleep on the couch in her sitting area again. I removed my shirt and grabbed a blanket, draping it over me as I stared at the ceiling thinking of my mate and trying not to let the anxiety of the unknown tear me apart. Exhaustion settled in the moment I lay back, and the soothing moonslight streaming in through the glass walls was the last thing I saw before I closed my eyes and held onto the fractured bond to my mate.
“I love you, Kya, ” I said down the remnants of our tether. “Beyond the bond. Beyond the realms between us. Beyond your choice. Beyond whatever it takes to get you back. We’re bound by fate, and I will find you. No matter what forces try to keep us apart.”