31. Chapter Thirty-One
Chapter Thirty-One
Malina
I had left Nikan in the wind and ran my horse as hard as I could all the way back to Ilrek. I didn’t let up. I didn’t stop. But Nikan had. He gave up, knowing full-well there was nothing he could do to stop me. I had arrived hours before him, which gave me plenty of time.
After what had happened with Hakoa, I wanted a larger cache of the elixir to keep on hand and in multiple places. I had become a little paranoid that Hakoa would return and look for more vials to smash so I made sure to find better hiding spots. I also feared Nikan would follow me here, so I made a mental note to ensure I was never followed.
As disgusted with myself as I was, I went back to Dax. I gave him his payment, he gave me more demid.
Dax and I were finishing cleaning up when I turned to face him. “What do I need to do to get more demid?”
“Well, you have two options: find another dealer who will take your coin, or pay me…more.” He winked.
“What more can I pay you with?” I asked. Even with the amount of coin I would get from the mission, it wouldn’t be enough unless I skipped most meals .
“If you want to get more, you have to give more .” He leaned back on his arms.
I rolled my eyes. “I only have one pussy, and your dick doesn’t look like it’s going to rise again any time soon.”
“Our little sessions have been pretty mild. They’re good, don’t get me wrong, but they’re basic. Only worth one vial at a time.” He shrugged. “What are you willing to do for more than one?”
Almost anything.
I swallowed. “Do you have anything specific in mind?”
Dax smirked with that charming look in his eyes. “While you only have one—glorious, might I add—pussy, you do have two other holes. I’d like to explore them.”
“Alright,” I agreed. That didn’t seem so bad. It wasn’t my favorite, but it wouldn’t be my first time.
“And I like to get a little…rough.” He tilted his head.
“Hmm. Rough how?”
“Tying you up. Gagging you. Choking. Hitting. Those kinds of things.”
I had done some wild things for a good time, but what he wanted was on a different level. “You want to choke and hit me? That gets you off?” I wasn’t judging, I was genuinely curious.
Dax sat up and leaned forward. “It’s not as bad as you think. And you’d be surprised at how pleasurable it can be for you,” he said reassuringly.
I had to hand it to him. For someone society considered despicable, at least he was bluntly honest. But it still didn’t sound like something I wanted to do.
“What other options do I have?” I asked as I gathered my hair to tie it back.
Dax pursed his lips, contemplating for a moment. “I have a few friends I owe favors to. They’d be happy to do business with you, if you’re willing to pay them the same way you pay me.”
I sighed. I felt enough shame fucking one male for demid, I preferred not to do it with several. Not to mention, I had come to trust Dax a little more. “Alright. I’ll give the ‘rough’ option a try.”
Dax smiled widely and stood then practically pranced across the room to open the door for me. “Looking forward to it. Same time tomorrow then?”
“Yeah,” I mumbled and left with a vial in my hand. At least one good thing came out of today. And I couldn’t wait to swallow it.
I went to see Dax almost daily. He did everything he’d said he wanted. Some of it I didn’t mind and even found a little enjoyable, but most of it wasn’t satisfying or even pleasant for me. And since it wasn’t giving me the escape I was searching for, I relied on the demid even more than I used to. I needed to obtain more, and therefore pay more. I fucked two of his friends.
As degrading as it was to my body, it was more degrading to my dignity.
I didn’t enjoy it, and I was sore and sensitive from the amount of stimulation.
It doesn’t matter. It’s just a body. It’ll heal.
I told myself that as I sank into the hot, soothing water of my bath with a vial in my hand. My body would heal. My soul wouldn’t, and that was why I needed the demid .
The only good thing to come out of so much rough sex was the exhaustion. It was almost as good as the demid, making me so tired that I slept dreamlessly.
It didn’t help that I would get drunk before each visit to Dax or one of his friends. It was the only way to make it more bearable, and I had the hope that if I was drunk enough, then I wouldn’t remember as much of it.
My life had been reduced to drinking, fucking, and sleeping. And that was just fine by me.
I got back to my rooms about midday and was planning to sleep off the alcohol after my bath, when someone banged on my door. I groaned and hopped out, throwing my clothes on.
Maybe if I don’t answer, they’ll go away.
It wasn’t Hakoa. I knew that. He left Ilrek after our fight, and I assumed he went back to Oryn. I was too stubborn to go down and ask Ryker about him, not to mention, I didn’t want to see him. After what I had said to him, I had no right. Eamon had tried talking to me a few times, but every time I came up with some excuse as to why I couldn’t, and I would dismiss him until I ultimately just avoided him altogether.
Content to ignore whoever it was, I lay in bed and pulled the blanket over my head. Then I heard my door burst open and feet quickly approaching.
“Mal. Mal.” Nikan shook my shoulder. “Wake up.”
I threw the blanket off. “I am awake, thanks to you.” I rolled over and glared at him.
He was filthy. His clothes were covered in dirt, and his dark face was crusted with dried sweat. But his eyes were alight with excitement.
“Get your dirt-covered ass off my bed,” I chided.
“Oh, sorry,” he mumbled and stood. “But I had to tell you Daegel is back. ”
That sobered me up, and I suddenly found myself no longer tired.
“Your deal…”
“It’s completely gone.” He lowered the collar of his shirt so I could see nothing but his skin, free from the curse.
“I thought it faded because he died,” I questioned.
“I have no idea. I don’t exactly have a manual for how deals with dark wielders work. Maybe he was weakened enough the magic failed. But regardless, he didn’t die.”
I sat up. “Why are you telling me? Shouldn’t you go tell Ryker?”
“I did. And he left immediately after.” Nikan nodded.
“Where did he go?” He couldn’t seriously try to go after him.
“I have no idea, he wouldn’t tell me. And for good reason,” he said.
“And that would be…?”
“Daegel tried to force me into another deal, for me to find the dark book. I didn’t do it. I didn’t give him the chance to tell me what I would get, but I know it wouldn’t be worth it. I managed to slip away before he could try another method. Ryker left to hide the book and didn’t tell me where in case Daegel comes for me again. We don’t know all he’s capable of,” he explained. “I’m going to be joining Ryker after the book is hidden. If Daegel shows up again, Ryker will be there.”
It was a lot of information to take in, and I was still coming off my last dose of demid
“Well… What’s Ryker planning to do about Daegel?” I asked.
“Fight him? Subdue him somehow? I don’t know, but he’ll come up with something.” He was smiling, and that was very concerning.
“You need to go back to the healer. Your face is broken.”
Nikan’s face twisted with confusion. “What?”
“Why are you smiling? This is kind of an unfortunate situation,” I said pointedly.
Nikan’s features softened, and his smile returned. “Because Daegel is alive . He survived the Rip. If what Ryker says about the bond is true, then that proves even further that Kya is alive.”
“Ayen’s ass,” I muttered under my breath and rubbed my temples. “Daegel is a dark wielder. Who knows what kind of shit his magic can do. It doesn’t mean Kya survived.”
Nikan shook his head. “You’re being unreasonable, Mal. And I’m blaming the demid. You’re ignoring the evidence that’s being presented to you.”
I wasn’t being irrational. I was being realistic. Demid or not.
“I’ll believe it when I see her.”