Chapter 20
Faking illness for a week, hiding but still going to uni and avoiding the sandwich shop was the best plan I could muster, given the circumstances.
I make sure when I get home, I thoroughly lock the house, guaranteeing Killian can’t just wander in whenever he feels like it.
Confined to my room, I’ve ignored every text and call from Killian.
But I can’t put Derren off any longer. I need to put my time and effort into him.
I need to see whether this relationship is going anywhere. To know it wasn’t all a waste.
Derren messaged me earlier, and I agreed to go out with him.
I did ask if it could be just the two of us because I’m not feeling well.
I know it’s a lie, just a little one, but I need to see him alone to see what I feel.
If I’m going to make this work with Derren, I need to be honest with him about Killian.
I can’t be honest if his mates are hanging around.
He pulls up, and I jog out to meet him. I slip into the passenger seat, and he leans over, almost close enough to kiss me, but he stops.
“You’re not contagious, are you?”
“No,” I snap back, confusion etching its way across his face.
He assesses me before he leans in a little closer and gives me a brief peck on the cheek.
I turn to meet his lips. Contemplation rears its head, trying to figure out if I’ve missed him while I’ve been hiding.
I want more from him, but before my lips meet his, he pulls back and starts the car, driving off like he’s an extra in Fast and Furious.
“Where are we going?” He only specified food earlier. What does that even mean?
“Food. I said that earlier.”
“Yeah, but where?”
“Does it matter?”
“Yeah, kinda.”
“You’re not gonna end up being one of those high-maintenance boyfriends, are you?
” He laughs, and I chuckle uncomfortably, not wanting him to think I’m being awkward.
We need time to get to know each other, to get on the same page and learn what we need from the other.
I’m willing to put the effort in. I’m just hoping he is, too.
We pull up outside a pub, and I smile as I climb out. The bar is pleasant, and I know they have good food. He walks around the car and meets me, taking my hand in his, leading me inside and straight to the bar. Ordering a beer for himself and a tap water for me. He grins over at me.
“I’m assuming you can’t drink on your antibiotics?”
I give him a tight-lipped smile and nod because I’m clearly caught in my own lie, not wanting to derail this before we’ve even eaten.
We’re led to a table in the back, and we take a seat.
Derren picks up the menu and starts looking over it.
He flicks back and forth before pulling out his phone and scrolling on it.
“Can we talk?” I croak. I feel nervous, and my stomach feels uneasy and churns.
The more I look at him, the less I want to tell him about Killian.
A lump forms in my throat, and I start to sweat.
I tug at the collar of my shirt and lean forward, taking a sip of my water.
My mouth opens and closes like a fish, but nothing comes out.
When the server pops back up. I scowl at her.
“Are you ready to order?”
Derren nods and asks for the chicken and rib combo with chips and onion rings. She writes it down and turns to me.
“And what can I get you?”
“He’ll have the soup.” Derren closes the menu and passes it over to her, and she plucks mine from my hands. I stare at him, and he grins at me, leans forward and takes my hands in his.
“How are you feeling?”
“I’m fine, Derren. I’m not ill anymore.”
“That’s good. Don’t want to overdo it, though. We’ll eat, and then I’ll drop you back home.”
“Will you stay?” I smile at him. I’d like him to stay over, to spend some quality time together.
“We’ll see how you feel after dinner.” He rubs his thumb over the backs of my hand and smiles at me.
Wanting to see if there is something here, my mind races with questions before I blurt out. “So, what are your aspirations?”
“Aspirwhat?” His face says it all.
“Aspirations, ya know, your hopes, and dreams.” He stares at me like I have two heads. “For the future,” I reiterate.
He shrugs. I stare at him, waiting for more, but he picks up his phone. Absently stroking my hand with his other while he scrolls. I sigh. How can I make this a reality if he won’t let me in? I want to connect with him. I just don’t know how to reach him.
Our food comes, and he mumbles about the warehouse, and some big fight he and his mates are going to see.
Some legendary fighter they’ve heard about is topping the bill.
This will be epic; he doesn’t fight as often anymore, and apparently, this will be the fight of the century.
I switch off. I feign interest and nod as he mumbles through the meal, talking about his car and how he wants to start doing it up.
His friends are going to help. Then he tells me about his holiday with the boys, and I wonder if he’ll ever have time for me.
If he’ll ever talk about me as animatedly.
I watch him; he’s handsome. He could be a good man.
I don’t know him well enough yet, but I want to. I want someone for me.
“Did you hear me?” He sounds pissed as he snaps the question.
“Sorry?” I mutter.
“Come on, let’s get you home.” He pulls me up from the chair, and he pays on the way out. He wraps his fingers through mine and pulls me outside.
As we walk to the car park, he stops, turns, and presses me against the side of the building. He leans in, and a hard kiss crashes against my lips. I blow out a breath and reach up, wrapping my arms around him. He buries his face in my neck.
He nibbles along my skin, and he mumbles, “Fuck, I want you so bad. I missed you.” He grinds against me, and I groan as I lean my head back.
I close my eyes and concentrate on his lips against my skin.
The way he licks and bites at my neck. I try to focus on just that.
Just him. I push all thoughts of Killian from my mind.
Or at least that’s what I plan. He thrusts against me, and I lean into him.
His hand fumbles with my belt as he pins me against the wall.
“Come back to mine, Derren. Please?” I gasp.
He pulls back and snatches my hand, dragging me toward the car.
The desperation in his grip burns into my skin.
I feel flushed and drunk, smiling as I’m tugged to the car.
Impatiently, we climb in, and he peels out of the car park.
He doesn’t speak but keeps turning to me and biting his lip as he drives faster than necessary.
Pushes through amber lights and screeches to a halt outside my house.
I climb out, and he rushes around to grab me, taking my hand and pulling me towards the house.
I fumble with my keys and push inside. After kicking the door closed, Derren tugs me towards the stairs. I laugh, letting him drag me along behind him. When we step into my room, he slams the door, and his gaze darkens.
“Take it all off,” he snarls at me. He starts undressing, throwing clothes on the floor.
I smile at him and start doing the same.
I remove everything, dropping it where I stand and staring at Derren.
His body is softer than I imagined. His tattoos are strange and mismatched.
It’s the first time I’ve seen him naked.
He’s unconventionally attractive. I concentrate on that slight attraction.
I focus on his body, his solid, proportionate dick that points at me, and I step towards him.
He meets me in the middle and wraps his arms around me.
I smile at him, and he lunges against me, crashing his lips to mine.
His tongue’s hot as it forces its way into my mouth.
I groan as his soft hands roam over my back.
His body held tight against mine. He pulls back.
“Get on the bed.”
I smile and nod as I do as I’m told, my hips sway as I smirk at him over my shoulder. After climbing seductively up against the bed, I roll onto my back, staring up at him. I prop myself on my elbows, expecting him to climb on top of me. When he steps towards the bed, he just glares down at me.
“Roll over.” I frown at him, “Roll over, Scott. Take your glasses off.” I turn over and place them on the bedside table. And he climbs over my body, he presses against me.
“Condom,” I mutter out.
“Don’t need one,” he growls in my ear as he starts to press his dick against me.
“Derren, stop.” I wriggle and move away, leaning to my bedside table and grabbing the condom from the drawer.
“Seriously. You’re stopping this right now to put a fucking Johnny on?”
I hand it to him. “Derren, please.” He huffs, but takes the condom from my shaking hand and rips it open, shaking his head as he slides it over his hard dick.
“Satisfied?”
I nod and lie back down. He taps his dick against my ass. He presses between my cheeks and pushes. I gasp out, and his hand moves to my shoulder, holding me down, and he thrusts. I grunt as he forces his way in.
“Derren,” I gasp, but he just keeps pushing, snarling as he goes. I push my face into the pillow, gritting my teeth; it fucking hurts. He’s not big, nowhere near as big as Killian, but no foreplay, nothing, just straight in dry, this hurts way more.
“Relax,” he snarls as his body lies on mine, pushing his dick fully inside me.
I try to breathe through the sting. His body holds me down, and he grunts into my ear, “I’m about to rock your world.
” His hips pull back and slam into me. Wincing, I moan as he thrusts and bucks, rutting into me.
I try to be present and participate, to enjoy this, but it’s painful. I groan, and his hips slam against me.
“Derren,” I gasp, not sure what I want from him.
“That’s it, baby, scream my name for me.”
He thrusts and slides his hand around my face, gripping my mouth.
“Say it, say my name,” he grunts with each thrust.