Chapter 15
CHAPTER FIFTEEN
Jonah
I turned Summer’s words over and over in my head. I was parked on the couch and it was well after midnight. I’d have a shit time returning to my normal hours if I stayed up late and slept in late.
I wasn’t willing to give up another life just because I’d wanted to stop being smothered.
The fury I felt toward her was shifting, changing direction like the wind outside. My brother was the next target.
How terrible was I?
Eli was gone. I was his older brother. I should’ve taught him better. I should’ve talked to him, asked him how things were going.
I had, but casually, like most brothers did. A random announcement. Hey, I’m here if you need me. Eli had never needed me. He’d been private about Summer. He’d claimed that he didn’t kiss and tell, and I’d never asked. I hadn’t wanted to hear how magical kissing Summer was.
Now that I knew, I was in a special hell.
She’d retreated to the guest room. She’d said she’d give me space, then leave. She’d done it before.
Fifteen years had gone by.
Then four days earlier, she’d walked in on me.
Did I want to risk another fifteen years before she came into my orbit again?
I was a shitty brother.
Yet . . . I couldn’t deny Summer’s experience. She’d been unhappy with Eli. She shouldn’t have had to stay with him to protect his feelings. Getting over a breakup had been his responsibility.
She’d tried to do the right thing by not leading Eli on.
Then again, when I’d been in the hospital and she’d known I was blaming myself.
But I’d insulted her, assuming she was there to hit on me after I’d been gawked at for months in my hometown.
After I’d hobbled through town, getting averted stares from women I’d dated.
Jackie still didn’t associate with me in public. I was her worst-kept dirty secret.
I frowned at the TV. What the fuck was playing? I had let the predictive option go wild and choose my next viewing, and now I was in the middle of a rom-com that I hadn’t paid one second of attention to. I let it play.
Stretching my legs in front of me, I groaned.
My joints had a general ache that was more from the barometric pressure than working outside.
Exhaustion swamped me. Pure mental exhaustion.
I’d been in a world of not knowing why for so long, taking on the burden of the accident and the outcome, and I’d been fucking terrified of being angry with Eli.
Now that I was? It wasn’t bad. Just a general yawning chasm that would never be filled because he was gone. I stood on the edge and hollered What were you thinking? and I didn’t get an answer. I never would and that was okay. Because I’d been taken out of the equation.
If Summer’s infatuation had been just that, maybe I would’ve raged for longer, but fuck, I was tired. She had squirmed on my lap and moaned my name. I wasn’t fucking twenty-four. I would be forty next year. And she still wanted me.
What would I do about it?
My dick stirred, wanting more of the laundry room action.
“Down, boy,” I murmured. I couldn’t fall on her after I’d accused her of being coldhearted at the table.
She might not want me after how I’d acted.
But I could apologize. I could tell her I understood. I could give her that. The comment she’d made about karma might’ve been flippant, but there was some validity there. Teenaged Summer would’ve never put up with someone like Boyd.
I heaved myself upright. I turned the TV off and dumped the remote on the couch.
The only light was from the hallway night-light.
I left my cane by the base of the stairs and stepped on the side of the first step so it didn’t creak.
I wasn’t sneaking up on her, but I also didn’t want my halting footsteps to herald my arrival, for her to open the door and wait and wait while I ascended.
Going up was better than going down, but I braced myself on the railing and wall. When I was at the top, I faced the dark brown wood of the door.
Was this a mistake?
It didn’t matter. She’d tried to be open with me once, and I’d snapped my fangs at her like a wounded animal.
I was a man. She’d made me feel like one earlier tonight.
I knocked on the door and waited. The fist that had knocked was still clenched at my side.
A lamp clicked seconds before the door opened.
Christ, she was an angel in an old Dunn Beef T-shirt she must’ve found in the guest room dresser. She blinked, her pretty lips turned down and her hair a jumbled mess around her shoulders. She let me see her disheveled, and I knew without asking not many people saw Summer unkempt.
“Jonah? What’s wrong?” Her gaze swept behind me, taking in the dark landing.
“Do you know why I was at the wedding?”
Her frown deepened. She wasn’t blinking, like I’d woken her up. She’d been wide awake. Was she as miserable as me? “Your mom made you go?”
“No. I had to make sure you were happy. I told myself it was for Eli, and maybe it was, but your past with him wasn’t the only reason. I had to see you. I had to see if you were really going to be someone else’s woman forever.”
“Why?” One word that was full of so much confusion.
“I don’t know. When I go to town, I look for you. You know that? I fucking peer around every corner like a goddamn stalker.” Why was I telling her this? She’d just told me how stifling Eli had been.
“You do?” She sank against the doorframe, a dreamy smile on her face. “Really?”
“Always. There was never a right time for us, and it was like I had to show myself that . . . you weren’t meant for me once and for all.”
Her smile dimmed. “And then the wedding got canceled.”
“Yeah, it did.” I crowded closer to her. This wasn’t what I’d come for. I should back off.
“So what does that mean?” She didn’t move away. “I guess it’s not once and for all yet?” She feathered her fingers down a fold in my sweatshirt.
“No. It’s not.” I wrapped a hand around her neck and an arm around her waist and drew her flush with me. I crushed her mouth with mine.
When her arms snaked around my neck, I was done. I wanted her and she wanted me.
Our past was tangled. Our present was complicated. Our future was unknown, but for tonight, I’d get the only woman I’d ever wanted.
Summer
I was surrounded by him. Consumed by him. He slid his tongue along mine in a sensual dance that could make me climax while fully clothed.
Well, I didn’t have a bra or underwear on.
I met his tongue stroke for stroke. His minty toothpaste flavor mingled with mine. His arms banded me to him, and his hard body was pliant compared to the rigid length pressed between us.
When he slid both hands to cup my ass cheeks and bent, I wasn’t ready. He lifted me. I yelped and automatically wrapped my legs around his waist.
“Jonah, don’t you dare hurt yourself before you’re inside me.”
“This is the furthest from pain I feel.” He took sure strides across the room. The lamp’s soft glow was hopefully enough light to make the trek safely. I didn’t want to see him hurt regardless, and I didn’t want to be the reason for it, but I wanted to keep my legs wrapped around him.
“Are you wearing nothing but this shirt, sunshine?”
“Yes. I was going to take this shirt with me when I left.” I had to have something of his to torture myself with.
He growled and nibbled my neck as he crossed the room. His long scruff scraped and tickled my skin, sending delicious shivers down my body.
He set me on the bed and captured my mouth again. With his hands planted next to me, I scooted back to make room for him to crawl on the bed, to get on top of me.
But he didn’t follow. Instead, he kissed his way down my neck while lifting my shirt. Then he backed off enough to draw the top over my head.
An exhale gusted out of him as he dropped the shirt and gawked at my body.
“Fuck me, sunshine. You’ve been covered in sweats the whole time when I could’ve been seeing your perfect tits?” He leaned forward, pressing a strong hand into the comforter, the veins on his forearm prominent.
Tilting his head, he eyed a small white scar at the side of a breast. He traced over the white line with a fingertip. Then another scar on my abdomen. And a third.
“What’s this from?” he murmured.
“They tried to find the bleeding after the accident.” My breathing was shallow and my nipples were pebbled so tight I could feel every exhale waft over them. Was this what he’d felt like when I’d massaged him? My fingers twitched to touch him. “You’re, um, entirely overdressed.”
“As long as you’re naked, I don’t care what I’m wearing.” He lifted his gaze to mine while trailing his fingers down my torso, stroking over my belly button and then lower.
I widened my legs like it was a reflex.
His expression turned contemplative, reverent, as he gazed at the junction between my thighs. He bent and hooked my knees over his shoulders.
I gasped and scooted farther up to make room for him.
“Stay right where you’re at. I’m about to find out what sunshine tastes like.”
“Oh, god, Jonah. Don’t tell me you have a mouth as wicked as your fingers.”
His heated look was so full of promise my legs trembled. “I’ve been dreaming about this for a long fucking time.” He dropped a kiss at the base of my abdomen. “You’re right here and spread for me. I must be fucking dreaming.”
“Jonah,” I whimpered.
He dipped his head again and flicked his tongue out, taking a little sample while holding my gaze. A satisfied rumble left him just as he buried his face in my pussy. He found my clit and played, licking and sucking and taking what I offered.
I arched my back off the mattress, but my bottom didn’t move. I was in his rock-hard hold, my legs locked in his grip. His hair brushed the sides of my thighs as I writhed beneath him.
“Jonah, oh my god. It feels so good.” Better than ever. There was no hesitation. No poking and muttering. No rushing me to my end so he could seek his pleasure.