Chapter Fifteen
Jasper
“Jas, we’re fine. Henry is fine. Dahlia is good.
She’s healed well. She’s safe in her new stable block.
There’ve been no developments with Phillip, the security you’ve hired is working out, and nothing of consequence has occurred,” Forrest said as I called him for the third time in forty-eight hours.
“Now, piss off and go do something other than stalk me.” He paused.
“You do realize we’ve dominated so far this weekend, yeah?
You should be celebrating with my little brother.
He’s no doubt up to his usual debauchery. ”
“I know,” I said. But since my night with Hallie—which absolutely could be classed as debauched—I’d been doing anything but.
I recalled the many meetings that have taken up my time in the days since I’d been here.
As much as my head hadn’t been in them, I’d walked away with several new contracts for Knighton Equestrian as well as many inquiries into the stud.
Huxley, Barnaby, and Seraphina all delivering this weekend had only increased interest in our horses.
“Our team is riding in an hour. Why aren’t you at the arena?
” I stared out the window that overlooked downtown Doha.
I could see the arena lit up in the distance.
The team event was being held tonight. I hadn’t gone to the dinner with Leon and the riders last night.
I fucking couldn’t. If I was even close to Hallie, I wouldn’t be able to stay away from her.
So I’d eaten room service alone and tried to work out what the hell to do about her.
Multicolored city lights stared back at me, my reflection coming into focus in the full-length window.
The place was stunning, but all I could see, think of, and hear was Hallie.
We hadn’t spoken about where we go from here.
It should be just one night. It had to be.
But I was being a pussy and couldn’t bring myself to say that to her. Or bear to hear it if she agreed.
I felt like fucking screaming. I ran my hand down my face. “I fucked her,” I suddenly blurted into my phone and was met with a wall of hard silence from my cousin. I cleared my throat, waiting for Forrest to speak.
“I’m assuming you mean Hallie?”
I nodded. “Yes.”
“Shit, Jas,” he said and sighed. “And what? Now she wants more, and you don’t?”
I laughed a sardonic laugh. I wish that was true. “Not quite,” I said, and Forrest was silent once more until . . .
“Shit. You want more.” My head dropped onto the glass, and I closed my eyes. I gripped my phone so hard the plastic creaked under my hold. “Jas?”
“I don’t know!” I said a bit too loudly.
Lowering my voice, I said, “I don’t fucking know, okay?
It can’t happen. I know it can’t. I’m too old for her, too fucked up, don’t want to put her in the center of the gossip mill, and don’t want to put her in danger with all the shite that we’re facing at home.
There’s a million fucking reasons why this can’t be more than one night. ”
“Jas,” Forrest said after several silent seconds. “I get what you’re saying. But I think you’re being too hard . . .”
“No,” I snapped. “Do not give me permission. Do not give me the excuse I need to seek her out again.” I clenched my hand into a fist. “I’ve managed to stay away these past few days, forced myself to. She’s too fucking pure for our life. Too innocent to get wrapped up in all our family drama.”
“She’s a twenty-five-year-old woman who can make her own damn decisions, Jas. Let her decide what she wants to do. How much does she know about everything?”
“Not much,” I said.
“For fuck’s sake, Jas. Is this how you’re going to live your life? Alone and rejecting anything you like, want, or love because you’re scared?”
“Of course I’m fucking scared!” I shouted. “My dad is dead, Genny can’t walk, Dahlia was a championship-winning horse who now can’t even accept a lead rope around her neck. I’m getting threatening letters almost daily, and—”
“You’re what?!” Forrest interrupted.
Shit. I replayed what I’d just said, and my stomach fell.
“You better tell me what the fuck you’re talking about, right now,” Forrest said, calmly, but I recognized my cousin’s ice-cold tone. I opened my eyes and defeat ran through me. I was sick and tired of doing all this alone. “Jasper,” Forrest pushed.
“I didn’t want to worry you all,” I said, voice hushed but strained. I moved to my bed and slumped down on the end. Forrest waited for me to continue. Sighing, I said, “I’ve been getting letters sent to me for a while now. Threatening letters,” I confessed.
“Where are they?” Forrest said, and I could hear him moving around the house.
“In a hidden drawer in the desk in my study. Above the top drawer there’s a secret latch where I’ve stashed them.”
“Where’s the key?” Forrest said minutes later, and I knew he was in my study, looking for a way to open it. I told him, and I heard the rustling of papers.
“Fuck, Jas,” Forrest said after a few tense minutes. “Why the hell didn’t you say something?”
“You’ve all gone through enough,” I said.
“And you haven’t?” Forrest snapped. He took a deep breath. “Has Phillip seen these? Tried to trace them?”
“Yeah, but he couldn’t find anything,” I said.
“You have a pile of new mail.” By the sound of shuffling paper, I knew Forrest was rummaging through those too. I waited until Forrest spat, “Motherfucker!”
“How many?” I asked. Even to my own ears I sounded exhausted.
“Three,” Forrest said. I could hear paper in his hands. “Why the fuck are they targeting you? What the hell have you done?”
“No idea,” I said, and dropped my head. “For a long time, I thought it was McGowen. But I don’t think that anymore. As much as I hate the prick, he’s turned his stud around after his dad nearly ruined them, and he’s winning more now I’m not on the circuit.”
“That’s exactly why he could be the one responsible,” Forrest said. “To keep you from competing so he can clean up all the prize money.”
I shook my head. “Phillip said he’s clean.
It isn’t him.” I could feel a headache building at the base of my skull.
“I suspect Alexis Hobbs, as do the Franklins, but again, Phillip found nothing on her, and without evidence, we have nothing.” I hated Alexis, believed she was capable of sabotaging stud farms up and down the country.
But the evidence suggested otherwise. “We have no idea who it could be, Forrest. They’re completely untraceable. ”
“Fuck, Jas,” Forrest said. I heard my office chair creaking and knew he’d sat down. “No more,” Forrest said after a while. I hadn’t even asked him what the letters said. It would be the same old bullshit. I’m going to destroy you, your family, and everything you love . . .
“You’re not dealing with this on your own anymore,” Forrest said. “We’re telling my brothers and Leon. If it must stop there, fine. We can keep this from Genny if you want. But we all need to do this together. You shouldn’t have been shouldering this alone.”
My vision blurred and I realized moisture had flooded my eyes. My throat was clogged, and as tears fell down my cheeks, all I could see was the blurred lights of the arena in the distance.
Hallie.
She had been the one bright spot in this shit show of a year. The night in the trailer . . . I wiped the tears from my cheeks. Fuck, that night . . . I couldn’t stop reliving it. The way she responded to me so well. How she tasted, felt, sounded . . .
She’d made me forget. For that window of time being inside her, I’d forgotten everything but her.
“We’ll get through this, Jas,” Forrest said quietly, and it was obvious he knew I’d just broken down, turned in on myself as I always did.
“Thank you,” I said. “I’ll . . .” I took a deep breath. “I’ll call later. I’m going to . . .” I trailed off.
“Go watch them,” Forrest said, interrupting my spiral.
“This is our fucking world, Cousin. Some arsehole with a chip on his shoulder isn’t going to take all we love from us.
” I nodded again, like he could see me all the way from England.
Forrest was right; I’d been running for so fucking long.
That wasn’t the Knighton way. We faced things head-on.
I ended the call and left, feeling a little lighter. But only one person would make my heavy thoughts completely lift. Will, my new personal security guard, nodded at me and followed me down the elevator and into my private car.
As the night lights of Doha passed me by, my leg bounced.
The minute I got to the arena, I went to the private box that Abdul had set aside for me.
I arrived just in time to see Sage clear the final fence.
I looked to the scoreboard. Four faults—she’d knocked down a pole on fence five.
Atticus had gotten a clear round with a great time. He was killing it.
“Next, representing the Knighton Cavaliers, is Hallie Oakley of Ocala, Florida, US, riding Lord Huxley!” the commentator announced, and something inside of my fucking dark soul was soothed as she trotted out on Huxley.
The entire team was wearing olive-green KE show jackets.
I moved to the very edge of the box, ignoring a few nearby whispers of my name from the stands.
Hallie picked up a canter, and I couldn’t take my eyes from her. Her shoulders were relaxed, and her fluidity held a grace that every equestrian would be jealous of.
She was born to ride.
The horn sounded and Hallie jumped the first fence. I folded my arms over my chest. With every obstacle, my body strained to jump the fences with her. The entire time she tackled the course, I barely breathed. As she approached the final fence, every muscle in my body grew taut.