Chapter 17
17
Arriving in Madison, WI this morning, the guys and I had a full day of press and filming content for our social team. It was go-go-go until we sat down for dinner. I immediately chowed down on the dairy-filled spread, happy for a few moments when I didn’t have to be ‘on.’ If I was overstimulated, then I know my brothers were even more.
While eating in a comfortable silence, my mind finally has time to drift. And it goes straight to the leggy blonde who has no doubt been avoiding me since I saw her at soundcheck. As bad as I feel about the incident, I appreciate the opportunity it gave me to learn more about her. Plus, she already accepted my chip apology. I hope the audios I have in the works will be even more well received.
Once I’ve shoveled enough food into my stomach to more than make up for missing lunch, I decide to make good on my promise to Lainey to ensure Ellie eats. It will make me feel marginally better about the way I can’t keep her off my mind. Grabbing a plate of food, I tell Grayson and Declan I’m going back to the bus. They nod, letting me know they have a meeting with Eliza and our agency team to talk about their next projects. That’s a punch in the gut. I’m still unsure of what my next move is. I’m glad I have feeding Ellie to distract me.
When I first get to the bus, she’s nowhere to be seen. I wonder if she’s gone out. It’s only a little after eight. I can’t imagine she’s asleep yet. I don’t think she’d go out without telling any of us, but after Dallas, I’m not sure. Her silent bedroom points to sleep. I need to know for sure or I’ll worry. It won’t hurt to peek into her room. If she’s there, I’ll know not to worry and if she isn’t, I’ll rally the troops, a.k.a. Declan, to find her.
Edging the door open, I let out a sign of relief when I see her lying in bed. At first, I think she’s actually sleeping, but then I notice something moving underneath the covers and the way her chest rises quicker than normal. Is she doing what I think she’s doing? I open the door wider to get a better view.
“Fuck.” The curse slips out of me before I can stop it and I freeze in place. Waiting a beat to see if my cover is blown, I consider backing out. I wanted to know if she was here and now I do. I have no reason to be standing here watching her like a creep. But I can’t seem to get my feet to move.
Ellie is mesmerizing. Even though I can only see her from the shoulders up, she is practically ethereal surrounded by the white bedding. Her face contorts in frustration and I wonder what—or rather, who—she’s envisioning. There is no sound in the room, so I know she isn’t using a video or audio to get off. It’s just her and her imagination. The idea of her getting off to thoughts of me has me stiffening in my pants. I was already sporting a semi, but I’m about to have a full-fledged problem on my hand if I don’t get the hell out of here.
Instead of leaving, I do something stupid. Really stupid. When Ellie makes a sound of discontentment. “If you’re having trouble, I am more than happy to lend a hand.”
It takes a beat, but then her eyes shoot open, pinning me where I stand. I consider apologizing, but the mix of lust and longing in her expression is too much to turn down.
Stepping further into the room, I let her know that we’ll have the bus all to ourselves for a while and reiterate my willingness to help her get off. And holy fuck am I willing. I would give almost anything right now to see her come. And to be a part of it . . . I’d give even more.
Ellie pulls her bottom lip into her mouth as she considers my proposition. She has no reason to accept it, but when she tells me to touch her, I almost come in my pants right then. I take one deep inhale to compose myself and decide on my next move.
“Move the blanket,” I command. Her hand moves to clutch the side. She hesitates. As much as I want to rip the blanket off her, this needs to be her decision. If she wants me to help her, it will be my fucking honor, but I won’t do it without her enthusiastic consent.
As the second she takes to make her decision drags on, I wait on bated breath. When she finally shucks off the comforter, I want to drop to my knees in gratitude. Placing one knee on the bed, I catch her gaze as I slowly crawl up toward her.
Allowing my fingers to ghost up her legs, my hand lands on top of hers over the tiny sleep shorts that have been tempting me all tour. They aren’t lingerie by any means, but with her long legs, they leave miles of creamy real estate to lust after.
“The thought of you in here playing with this pussy is enough to bring a man to his knees, Wildflower. Tell me you haven’t been in this room every night making yourself come when I was on the other side of that door dreaming of a moment exactly like this.”
“I wasn’t,” she confesses. “This is the first time. ”
“So many weeks without relief. No wonder you’re pent up. You need to come, Ellie?”
She nods, shivering at the question as I gently tug on her wrist, pulling it out of her shorts. Her pretty blue eyes bore into mine, pleading for relief. Relief I’ll give her, but I want something first.
“Give me a taste. Give me a taste and I’ll make you come all over my fingers until you’re seeing stars.”
“You want to taste me?” She looks nervous and excited by the proposition. She reaches to tug down her shorts, but I stop her, causing her to wrinkle her brow.
“I would love nothing more than to bury my face in what I know is a perfect pussy, but if I do, we won’t be leaving this room until morning, and I’m not sure you’re ready for that.”
“Then how?” she asks.
Instead of answering, I pull her hand to my lips and slowly suck the fingers she was using to please herself into my mouth. I moan as the taste of her desire coats my tongue, willing it to imprint in my brain so I never forget it.
As my tongue licks her essence off her fingers, I slip mine under the band of her shorts. She’s already wet from her early ministrations as I tentatively flick her bud to see how sensitive she is. She immediately bucks against my hand.
Letting her hand fall away, I move my lips to kiss up her arm to her shoulder. I nip at the creamy skin there, humming in satisfaction as it pinks under my attention. As my lips reach the delicate skin behind her ear, she pushes her hips into my circling fingers.
I slide one finger down her folds and slip it into her entrance with little resistance. When it comes out coated, I add a second. She mewls at the contact of my thumb against her clit as my digits work inside her.
One of her hands shoots to the back of my neck where she pulls me further into her and the other grips my forearm. Her nails are blunt but part of me is desperate for her to leave an indention behind. I’d happily tattoo her nail marks on my skin and wear them with pride.
I touch a spot inside her that changes her tiny keens to a loud, breathy moan. I can tell she is getting close by the way she grips me harder and grinds into me.
“You’re so close. Are you going to come for me, baby? Are you going to come all over my fingers?”
“Jack, fuck. Yes. Don’t stop.”
I suck harder on her neck as I maintain the speed and pressure. I give my wrist a slight twist and she trembles against me, core clenching. As she shudders through her orgasm, I whisper what a good girl she is and how hot having her come on my fingers is.
When she comes down from her orgasm, she releases her hold on me and watches, stupefied, as I slide the parts of me that were inside her into my mouth. As if I’d waste any of her taste. I am going to get myself off later with her taste on my tongue.
Panting below me, uncertainty swirls in her eyes as she reaches for my painfully neglected cock. Grabbing her hands, I shake my head. “Not tonight. Tonight was about you. You feel good?”
“Yes,” she laughs. “I don’t remember the last time I felt this incredible. That was—wow.”
“Glad to be of service. I’m happy to help anytime you need assistance,” I croon coyly. I should probably say something more substantial, but all the blood has rushed to my dick and I can’t ignore it any longer.
Kissing her swiftly, I push off the bed and walk to the door. Glancing back at her dreamy expression one last time, I make my way into the shower to take care of myself. Using my clean hand to grip my cock, I press my forehead against the wall, inhaling the scent of her on my other hand mixed with the smell of her shampoo in the small cubicle.
It takes shockingly few strokes remembering the sounds she made and the sensation of her falling apart beneath me until I’m finding my own release.
Catching my breath, my thoughts stay on the beauty in the bed in the next room. Tonight we didn’t just cross a line. We went so far past it that I can’t even see it anymore. And I can’t seem to care.
I don’t want to fight my feelings for Ellie anymore. The situation is complicated, but to go back to how we were before would be impossible. I want her to be mine. I need to find out if she wants the same and how we can make this work, for me, for her, and for Lainey.
Unsurprisingly, Ellie is back to avoiding me the next morning. We had to leave earning to do some press and by the time I got back, she was nowhere to be found. Part of me is glad because I’m not sure what to say yet. The other part is desperate to see her and know what she’s thinking.
My head is full of conflicting emotions. I’m filled with guilt, nerves, and self-doubt. Things I don’t normally experience. That would normally worry me, but all those emotions are overshadowed by longing.
I know Lainey won’t be happy if something develops between me and Ellie. I also know that I have never felt this way toward another woman before and I would be foolish to let it pass me by. Sure of my intentions, I think we can all be mature enough to handle this situation in a way where no one has to get hurt, except maybe me if Ellie isn’t on the same page. Though, I’m less unsure about that after the way she came on my hand last night.
I’m not so much nervous that she doesn’t want me now, but that she won’t want me later. Ellie is smart and put together in a way I’ll never be. She has a master’s degree and I am essentially a high school dropout. If I couldn’t play the guitar and hadn’t had a few lucky breaks, who knows where I would be.
I know Ellie isn’t after my money or clout, but I doubt she would look my way without them. I have no idea what I could offer her, but the way she looks at me sometimes gives me hope that she thinks something. I’d give her the world, but I have no doubt she can get that on her own. The best I can offer is staying back and watching her shine. I can be the safe place she returns to after taking on the world. The place where she recharges for her next adventure.
After searching for her for twenty minutes, I decide to give her the space she clearly wants. She knows where to find me. And if she doesn’t soon, let’s just say it is a good thing that I know where she sleeps.