32. WINTER
WINTER
Earlier in London,I’m a wreck by the time Hunter hangs up the phone to go check on Mason. I need to get home and fast because I don’t know what the hell is going on. I don’t even know if that was just a video or if he really would hurt himself, like said video implied.
I’mso fucking scared that I waited too long to work on things between us. Scared that I won’t make it home in time. I’m so fucking scared that I’ll lose him for good because of my own stupidity and insecurity.
Ihope, pray, and beg that nothing happens to him because I don’t know what I’d do if that happens. I think I’d be lost for the rest of my life if he succeeds and isn’t it such a fucking wake up call to finally realize that when I might be losing him? I’m on the verge of hysteria again when I call Adelaide.
“Hey babe, what’s up?” she asks, as she answers.
“I need your help!” I blubber into the phone, sobbing once again.
“Calm down babe. What’s the matter? Why are you crying? Is everything okay with you and the babies?” she questions, sounding panicked.
“No,” I cry. “We’re fine. It-it’s Mason. He’s in trouble and I need to get to him. I need to borrow your plane, please! Mine is at home, it’ll take too long to get here then back again. A commercial one will take too long.”
“Hey, hey. Calm down for the babies’ sake please. The stress can’t be good for them. I’ll be over in a minute, I’m not far away from the hotel and I’ll call my pilot,” she tells me.
“Okay. Thank you.”
Icollapse onto the couch once again and more sobs rack my body. I feel so helpless because I’m so far away and I have no clue if he’s okay or not. The not knowing is killing me right now.
Ihear my elevator ping as it reaches the penthouse and a moment later Adelaide, Carter and Maxcen step off. She instantly rushes over to me and engulfs me in a hug. It’s a good thing I gave her the code to my elevator a while ago because my legs feel too numb to move right now.
“What exactly is happening?” she asks a moment later. I give her the quick rundown of everything and then she helps me get dressed. “Let’s head for the airport. The plane should be ready by the time we get there.”
“You guys don’t need to come. I don’t want to keep you from anything,” I tell her while we’re all in the elevator.
“You’re my best friend and you’re pregnant, not to mention the stress you are under right now, so we’re going to make sure you’re not going home alone,” she tells me in a firm voice and who am I to argue with the Mafia queen?
“Thank you,” is all I say instead.
Carteris on the phone while we’re in the car but I don’t pay any attention to what’s being said or much else going on around me. The only thing my mind is on, is him. The whole flight I’m a worried mess, I guess it’s a good thing I have the company because I would have definitely lost it and cried the whole flight if I was on my own.
I’mexhausted by the time we finally land in Ravenwood. I’m still worried even though Hunter called and said that Mason is going to be okay. We all get off the plane and I see we already have three cars waiting for us.
“They’re still at the hospital,” Carter says to us as we get in and the driver pulls away. We are all in one car, while one of the other vehicles takes the lead and the other tails us, as we make our way to the hospital.
Assoon as we get there, Carter takes charge and asks for Mason’s room. He gets all the info and we take the elevator up to his floor. When it opens up, I take off at a sprint to find his room.
WhenI get to his door, I quickly twist the knob and fling it open. It bangs against the wall and my eyes land straight on the bed. I see Mason laying still on it, he’s hooked up to so much shit that my heart breaks at the sight of him.
Iinstantly burst into tears as I rush over to him. I throw my arms around him, being careful with the wires, as I hug him hard to me. My face is in the crook of his neck as I continue to sob.
“I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I’m sorry…” I keep chanting quietly, begging him to wake up, but he’s still unresponsive. This is all my fault and the weight of that just crushes me further, as I feel my legs buckle from under me.
Ican’t lose him, I just can’t. Not when I haven’t even set the record straight to let him know that the babies are his. Why the fuck did I even let him believe that they weren’t? A moment later I feel hands on me and when I turn around, I see that it’s Hunter. He pulls me in for a hug and I cling to him as I sob some more. My eyes are already swollen from the amount of crying I’ve done already.
“Calm down sis,” Hunter whispers as he holds onto me. “Think about the babies. The doctor assured us that he’s fine. He just needs the rest. We got to him in time.”
Iknow his words were meant to reassure me but I just sob even harder. From guilt, relief? I have no clue but just hearing that he’s going to be fine eases some of the ache in my chest.
Amoment later he moves us and places me on the chair between him and Grayson and I can’t even look at Gray. This is all my fault. I’m the reason Mason resorted to wanting to take his life. What if Gray hates me now? Just thinking about that makes the ache in my chest return full force.
Hesurprises me though when he wraps his arm around me. He holds me, rubbing his hand up and down my back to calm me. He says his piece, and I let him know that I was already coming home to him when all of this happened. He hugs me tighter for a moment before easing his hold again.
Ilet Hunter know that his brother—well, our brother since I’m considering Carter my brother as well even though he’s not my blood, but he”s family—is outside along with Adelaide and Maxcen.
Hegoes outside to talk with them as I continue to sit with Gray on the chair. We sit there for a while in silence before the rest of the gang comes back into the room. We all just sit and talk to pass the time.
Hunterbrings me food when it’s dinner time and even though I’m not hungry, he reminds me that I’m eating for two other people now. So, I reluctantly stuff the food down my throat. OnceI’m done, I get my brother’s attention.
“Hey, can you take Adelaide, Carter, Maxcen and Gray home? I’ll stay with Mason.”
“Um are you?—”
“Please. I just want to be alone with him for a while.”
“Okay. No problem but I’m still going to have two of my guys stand guard outside the door so if you need anything just let them know and we’ll be back in the morning, okay?”
“Yeah, that works Mr. Worrywart. Thank you.” I tell him and he pulls me in for a hug, giving me another one of his kisses on my forehead.
“Call if you need anything before morning,” Gray tells me, giving me a hug as well.
Ialso get hugs from Adelaide and the guys before they all leave. Now that I’m alone with him I move back toward his bed and take my shoes off before climbing in next to him. This is a big bed since it’s the private part of the hospital, so there’s more than enough room for the both of us.
Ilie down next to him and when I’m setting myself properly so that I won’t disturb him, I notice the bandages on both his arms. Looking down at my own scars, I get choked up again because I know what those mean. He really did try to take his life…
Thereality of that revelation sends pain shooting through my chest, my airway constricts and I have to try really hard to calm myself down, so I won’t have a panic attack. I put a palm over his chest and touch his skin, feeling his heartbeat under my hand reassures me that he really is alive and he’s just sleeping.
Imove my hand and lay it across his stomach, hugging him as I settle in for the night. I thought I’d have a tough time falling asleep but feeling him next to me settles me and, in no time, I’m out like a light.
Iwake up to light caresses up and down my arm. My eyes pop open and I see that we’ve changed positions sometime last night. My head is now in the crook of his arm and he has his hand resting on me. I quickly look up to see that his eyes are open and he’s looking down at me.
“Hi,” I whisper as tears fill my eyes.
“Hi baby,” he says, pulling me close to him and kissing me on the top of my head. “This is the sight I want to wake up to for the rest of my life, I mean minus the hospital bed of course.”
Iquickly sit up in the bed and just stare at him. “How can you joke at a time like this! I almost lost you!”
“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to joke. Come here, baby,” he says when I start sobbing. He holds me to him as I sob on his chest, thinking about everything I almost lost.
“I love you and I’m sorry! I want to give us a second chance. I want to be with you for the rest of our lives,” I cry into his chest.
“I guess it’s a good thing I didn’t die then,” he jokes.
“Don’t make me kick your ass! You’re ruining the moment!” I grumble when I sit up again.
“I love you too, baby. Always.” he says with a boyish smile on his face.
“Before we go home, I want to make things right. I have a confession to make.”
“What is it?” he asks, with a bit of apprehension in his voice.
“I’m pregnant with twins. AndI lied. The babies are yours. I saw a doctor in London and got checked out to make sure the babies were healthy. I also asked him to confirm the conception date. I got pregnant way before Antonio took me,” I tell him.
“Are you serious? Twins?! And they’re really mine?” he asks with excitement in his voice as he brings his hand up to rub my baby bump. He stops just before touching it and looks up at me. WhenI shake my head yes, he begins rubbing it with an awed expression on his face.
“Yes.”
“Looks like that placebo shot I made the doctor give you, worked,” he says to me with a huge smile on his face, and then to my belly, “Hi babies! It’s your daddy here and I can’t wait to meet you.”
“You did what?!” I yell at him.
“I had to do what I could to win you back at the time, though I didn’t foresee all this fuckery happening,”
“As soon as you’re better, I’m going to kick your fucking ass! How could you? We should have discussed this, you idiot!” I grumble.
“Are you saying you don’t want to have my kids?” he pouts.
“I’m already pregnant with them! I can’t do anything else but have them.”
“Hell yeah, you are,” he smiles. Grrr! You know, what? New start, new start, new start…
“I’m sorry for lying to you and saying that they weren’t yours. I guess I still wanted to hurt you. And you’re not a monster. I’m sorry I said that too. I promise I won’t be a bitch anymore. This is going to be a fresh start for us. I won’t bring the past up anymore, that is, if you’ll still have me.” I whisper that last part. He pulls me to him again and kisses me.
“I love you so fucking much. AndI am sorry for everything. I want this to be a new start for us, too. No more hurting each other. We’re going to look toward the future and enjoy it all with our family, friends and our babies when they get here.”
“To the rest of our lives,” I tell him as he pulls me in for another kiss.