Burdens (Vendetta #3)

Chapter 3

CHAPTER 3

NOAH (PAST)

I knew I was in trouble the moment I laid eyes on her as she walked into the bar.

That she’d obliterate the first rule I’d given myself when I moved to Blackwell ten years ago the moment she sat a few seats down from me.

But in my defense, how could you look at this woman and not want to know more about her?

I’d tried my best to ignore her over the last thirty minutes, but it was impossible. Her presence alone sent my skin buzzing like it’d been electrocuted and revived all my senses back to life.

The bar was crowded for a Sunday night, but all I could focus on was her.

She was on her own and nursed whatever was in her glass quietly, occasionally chatting with the bartender, Andrea. She was wearing a high-waisted long green skirt and a black vest that revealed a sliver of her tanned midriff every time she shifted on her barstool.

Her dark brown hair cascaded down her back in waves and some pieces framed her face. I’d only caught a glimpse of her face, but it was enough to make my breathing stutter.

High cheekbones, pert nose with a tiny diamond stud piercing, and plump lips that begged to be devoured.

My mind wandered to thoughts of slowly peeling back her layers and exploring her with my lips, but I kept reminding myself I was here for one drink only before I turned in for the night like I always did.

When Jamal and I had moved here after the Bureau had dismissed me from his parents’ case, Theo had forced me to go out before my first day back at the academy, saying I needed to relax if I wanted the new recruits not to think I was an asshole with a stick up my ass.

I’d brushed him off and ignored his request until he’d shown up at my door saying he would watch over him while I went out.

I’d spent the entirety of that night staring blankly at an empty tumbler, thinking about how much my life had completely changed in a matter of weeks, how much more it was about to change.

I was becoming a guardian at the age of twenty-three. To a kid I’d barely known at the time aside from the occasional get-together his father had thrown every once in a while and forced me to attend because he’d thought it would be a good idea for me to socialize with the team instead of staying in my own corner.

At that point, all I’d known about Jamal was that I liked him, but I didn’t know the first thing about parenting. I wasn’t even sure I wanted kids, especially with the type of father I grew up with.

I had millions of unanswered questions spinning in the back of my brain. What if I ended up being like my father? What if I became a bad figure to Jamal and fucked him up? Most importantly, what would happen to him if I didn’t accept guardianship?

The answer to my last question alone had overtaken my worries over the others. If I hadn’t, Jamal would have ended up in foster care and after everything his dad did for me, I couldn’t let that happen. Jamal was a good kid and he deserved as good of a childhood as he could get despite becoming an orphan so young.

Although I’d hated to admit it, Theo had been right. I’d needed that night away from everything to sift through my thoughts. There had been no time for that when I had to take care of a whole other human being. Jamal’s needs had immediately overtaken mine the moment Ayoub and Nina’s lawyers had called me to announce that I was now the sole responsible adult tasked to take care of their son.

So every year like clockwork, I showed up at Faro, nursed a single drink, and went home. I’d convinced myself that coming here the night before my first day was necessary. Besides, it was cheaper than therapy.

Faro wasn’t exactly my scene, but I was a man of routine. I liked predictable.

And she was anything but.

I mentally cursed myself. Why was I so intrigued about her? Nothing ever really captured my attention easily, but something about her just… I didn’t even know how to describe it.

The right thing to do would be to stay away from her and go to my place. Because if her presence alone was making me feel like there wasn’t enough oxygen in my lungs, getting closer, even just for one night, would be life-altering and the last thing I needed.

I forced myself to focus on finishing my drink and getting the hell out of here before I gave away to temptation. Except…

One last look wouldn’t hurt, right?

I chanced a sideways glance and expected her to be in the same position, hopefully oblivious to my admiration, but her seat was now empty.

“Are you going to keep staring all night, or will you do something about it?” a sultry voice murmured from my left.

I turned my head to the side, only to find her standing right next to me. One of her hands was propped against the counter, while her other swayed behind her back. She was so close, her front brushed against my shoulder as she looked down at me.

I slowly brought my gaze up, letting my eyes wander over her body and relishing the opportunity to really take her in. I knew I should be a better man, but my eyes lingered on her luscious breasts before I finally met her gaze.

Every thought I ever had seemed to fade away when her dark green eyes locked on my brown ones. For a moment, I lost myself in them and let myself drown in the lust swarming in her pupils. I thought she was beautiful from the little I’d seen, but she was even more stunning up close.

And when she gave me one of the sexiest smiles I’d ever seen, my heart skipped a beat.

I suddenly felt nervous and I never got nervous. I prided myself in being confident and good at everything I put my mind to. I never failed or gave up.

But there was something about her, about the way her voice poured over me like honey that put me on edge.

I’m in deep trouble.

I should excuse myself and brush off her statement as a misunderstanding. Should being the key word. The last thing I needed in my life was someone like her to walk into it, but she was a stranger and something about the look in her eyes hooked me in.

Something that I curiously found myself wanting to discover more about. Even if it was just for one night. Besides, I never backed down from a challenge.

Oh and fuck it. What do I have to lose?

“Hi,” I blurted out.

Smooth, Noah . Real, smooth. God, I’m so out of practice.

Her eyes shone with amusement. “Hi.”

Keeping my gaze on hers, I drew out the chair next to me and placed my hand on her lower back, inviting her to sit. My fingers briefly brushed against the sliver of her exposed skin when I pulled it away as she slid onto the stool.

Even the smallest contact set my nerves on fire.

She propped one of her elbows onto the bar, resting her face in her palm and tucking her other hand under it. “I’m Mia.” She offered. “What’s your name?” I knew she was lying about her name, but I didn’t blame her because I was about to do the same.

I held my right hand out. “Jonah.”

She pulled her hand out from under her elbow and grabbed mine, my calloused hand enveloping her delicate one. “Nice to meet you, Jonah,” she said, smiling.

I wasn’t a jealous person by any means, but in that second, when the fake name I’d given her left her lips, I’d never been more jealous of a nonexistent man in my life. I even found myself, for an infinitesimal moment, imagining what my real name would sound like from her lips.

We lingered for a moment, looking into each other’s eyes as if waiting to see who would give up first.

“Likewise, Mia.” I raised her hand and brushed my lips across her knuckles. I noticed the sharp intake in her breath and the dark blush that crept up her face.

“Can I get either of you anything?” A soft, slightly accented voice snapped the thread holding our suspended moment.

Mia slid her hand out of mine, returning to her previous position, and turned her attention to Andrea. My eyes, however, remained on her as she gave our bartender her order. “Could I have another Macallan 18, neat? Please and thank you,” she said with a bright smile.

I raised my brow at that and looked over at Andrea, who gave me a knowing look. Her gray hair was pulled up with a claw clip as usual, and she was wearing an oversized black blouse, the front slightly tucked into her dark jeans. Her older brother, Marco, owned the place and she’d been serving me my one glass of the same thing ever since I stepped foot here ten years ago.

A Macallan 18, neat.

This was just a simple coincidence, but out of all the things she could order, the fascinating woman next to me drank the same thing as me.

“And for you,” Andrea started, even if she knew I never had more than one glass, but I cut her off before she revealed my name to the beautiful stranger next to me.

“Make that two. Thank you,” I said, despite having barely made a dent in my first one.

Andrea gave us a quick nod and made her way to prepare our drinks. After handing them to us, she gave me a look and shook her head before letting out a huffed laugh and leaving to tend to another customer who had just walked in.

I grabbed the tumbler and brought it to my lips, taking a sip and hoping the bite from the whiskey would distract me from the effect Mia’s closeness was having on me.

A thousand questions swirled in my mind, but I dismissed them. I had to fight my instincts to go into interrogation mode because I wasn’t at work right now and doing so would probably make her run the other way.

Which was probably a better—smarter—option, but I didn’t want her to leave quite yet. So I placed my glass back on the countertop before I drank the whole thing and went in with a safe question.

“What brings you to town?”

Surprisingly, the innocent question caught her off guard. I could tell she didn’t expect me to lead with that line of conversation with the way her eyes slightly widened and the hint of worry that flashed in them.

The signs might have been imperceptible to others, but reading people was an integral part of my job and this stunning creature was hiding something.

She schooled her features back and tilted her head to the side, giving me another one of her killer smiles. If I didn’t know any better, I would bet money that she had training.

“What makes you think I’m not a regular here?” She took a sip of her own drink and a droplet of whiskey spilled out, landing on her lip.

My eyes snapped to her mouth and the chatter around us fell to a quiet murmur. Her tongue swiped out to clear it away, sending desire coursing through my veins as I imagined how much better the liquor I’d savored a thousand times before would taste on her skin.

Before I realized what I was doing, I reached out for one of the legs on her stool and angled her to bring us face to face. Then I widened my stance and tugged her closer because for some reason I wanted to erase any space between us.

Something I’d never felt like doing before.

“I would have remembered you,” I whispered as I placed my elbow on the bar and leaned against my fist, my index finger resting on my temple. I watched her carefully, studying her reaction to my confession.

A visible shiver rolled through her body, but instead of my admission taking her aback, her gaze raked down my white long-sleeved shirt to my black pants I’d put on this morning before checking out of my hotel in Sibaya.

The outside of her knees pressed up against my inner thighs as she fit her legs between my own and propped her boots on the front leg of my chair. Then she placed her hands on my knees and leaned her body toward me.

A whiff of her scent carried my way, an amber and woody floral scent filling my senses. It was heady and alluring.

As I held her gaze, her smile dimmed to be taken over by a look filled with so much heat that it rivaled my own. So much fire that it set my firmly erected walls ablaze, threatening to crumble them into ashes.

“Care to make a wager?” she murmured, a hint of playfulness in her tone.

An amused smile tugged at my mouth, surprising me. People rarely stunned me, but she’d been doing just that since she walked in.

“What kind of wager?” I asked, arching a brow.

“Why don’t you come closer and find out?” she suggested, leaning her body closer and for a moment, I debated over her proposition.

The intensity of her gaze was intoxicating. It made the hand resting on my thigh itch with the need to touch her. All I wanted to do in that moment was grab her face and kiss the fuck out of her.

She was beautiful and I bet she tasted divine.

That’s when my logic set back in and I realized I needed to walk away. I started work tomorrow and had to stay focused. She was unpredictable and my life didn’t have space for that.

My reasoning might be faulty, but I couldn’t do this.

I broke eye contact and snapped our connection. I quickly glanced at the time on the register behind the bar and noticed it was almost one in the morning. I cleared my throat and said, “I have to go.”

She parted her lips to say something, but I had already grabbed my brown leather jacket that was resting on top of the backrest and left before I could hear what she had to say.

The front doors to Faro closed behind me with a thud and the moment the salty breeze of the Mediterranean Sea washed over me, I let out a frustrated sigh. Gravel crunched underneath my feet as I donned on my jacket and headed for my car.

I wasn’t proud of the way I’d just rushed out and left her, but this was the right thing to do.

Right?

I wasn’t planning on actually leaving the parking lot until I made sure she left the bar safely, but being near her blurred too many of the lines I’d carefully constructed around my life.

And I didn’t have enough strength in me to keep resisting her.

I shook my head in an attempt to clear the haze that clouded my judgment, even though I knew it was useless. I wouldn’t be forgetting her anytime soon.

I grabbed my keys from my pocket and unlocked my car. I was about to step inside when a voice broke into the quiet night.

“Wait.”

I stilled because I knew without looking who it was. I finally glanced over my shoulder to find her standing in the middle of the dimly lit parking lot. Her hair blew in the wind as she rubbed her palms against her bare arms to fight the biting cold.

She walked in my direction. “You didn’t answer my question from earlier.”

As she got closer, I noticed the goose bumps peppering her skin and her pebbled nipples straining against her thin top. I groaned and took off my jacket, then draped it over her shoulders before I took a step back to put a healthy distance between us.

“What question?” I asked, trying to stall.

She wasn’t making it easy because she closed the distance until the tip of her boots met mine. Her fingertips snaked up my front until she hooked her forefinger under the gold chain I was wearing and tugged me down to her so close I could almost taste her.

My hands at my sides flexed and a pained groan rumbled through my chest as I waited for her next move.

Then, in the quietest, most sultry voice, she said, “Are you going to keep staring all night, or will you do something about it?”

I could smell the hint of whiskey on her lips and all I could think about was how ridiculously jealous— again —I’d felt when she’d licked that droplet off her lips. How much I wanted to be that droplet to know what it would be like to have her mouth on me.

Fuck, I wanted her. I shouldn’t, but I did. Badly .

I should make the right decision, but for the first time in my life, I felt inclined not to. I kept my gaze locked with hers. “How about you find out?” I said in a low tone, our lips so close that on my confession, they brushed.

The hair at my nape rose as I watched for any hesitation.

When she didn’t move, I wrapped my hand around her lower back and roughly grabbed the back of her head with the other. Whirling her around, I pressed her back against the back door on the driver’s side and flattened my body against hers. Our fronts molded against one another, our lips a mere whisper away.

She sucked in a startled breath and I knew she could feel how turned on I was. My gaze bounced back and forth between her lust-filled eyes and said, “One night.”

But the moment the words left my lips, I knew they were a lie.

“One night,” she reciprocated.

The last tether of my control snapped and the second our lips connected, all the reasons why I shouldn’t do this evaporated into thin air. The only thought my brain could conjure right now was how fucking good she tasted.

I knew it.

I slid my tongue against hers and she wrapped her arms around my neck to pull herself tighter to me. Having her kiss me with the same ferocity sent me into overdrive. Heat flooded my veins as my pulse kicked up a notch.

I maneuvered her away from the back door and threw it open. Pulling my lips away from her, I growled, “Inside. Now.”

Once she did, I climbed into the back seat, joining her. Then I immediately pulled her onto my lap, kissing her again.

God, she was fucking addicting.

How the fuck is this supposed to be one night?

With her hands on my shoulders, she grinded against my growing erection and my hands fell to her hips to urge her closer. I moved my lips from her mouth to pepper kisses along her jaw and down her neck while simultaneously bringing one hand up to pop the single button that was holding her top together.

Then I pushed the fabric aside and snaked my tongue down, wrapping my mouth around her peaked nipple. I licked over her nipple once before biting down, eliciting a low moan from her.

Her hands snaked up the back of my neck to grip the hair at my nape as she held me firmly to her chest, which sent even more desire coursing through my veins, knowing she wanted more.

So I swirled my tongue around to soothe the sting before moving to her other breast and doing the same, hoping to elicit the same reaction.

And I got exactly what I wanted.

“Fuck,” she groaned before she pulled on the strands of hair to guide me back to her mouth. Her lips found mine in a passionate kiss as she worked her hips in a circle, rubbing herself against my covered cock.

I needed to be inside her and it was like she read my mind when her hands grazed down my chest and unbuttoned my pants. Out of breath, I pulled back to watch her slip a finger under the waistband and say, “I need you to fuck me.”

No longer surprised by her candor, I let out a taunting small laugh and glanced up to meet her heated gaze. “Take me out then.”

Without hesitation, she pulled the zipper down and slid her hand inside my boxer briefs, wrapped it around me and squeezed me tightly.

My head dropped back against the headrest and I let out a groan. Fucking hell.

My fingers dug into her hips as she stroked my cock up and down. She slid her hand up and brushed against the opening at the tip before tightly squeezing the sensitive skin there.

I shot up and grabbed the back of her head with one hand. “I said take me out, not play with it,” I growled against her lips.

She smiled against my lips and squeezed again. “What if that’s what I want?”

Instead of giving her an answer, I dropped my hand from the back of her head to her hip and bunched her skirt up to give me better access. I met her mouth again as I slipped a hand under her skirt, pushed her underwear to the side, and shoved two fingers inside her sweet cunt in one swift motion.

Her hold around me loosened and her eyes squeezed shut as she screamed, “Oh, God.”

“Yeah, I tend to have that effect.”

Her eyes fluttered open and she smacked my chest. “You’re an asshole.”

I brought my face closer and curled my fingers inside her in a languidly slow circle. Her eyes widened and I whispered, “And you’re wet.”

She whimpered as I removed my fingers out of her. Bringing my hand up, I pressed my fingers coated in her against her lips to show her. I watched in fascination as she dragged her tongue out and circled her hot mouth around my fingers to wipe them clean.

I swiftly took them out and crashed my lips onto hers with a hungry moan, needing a taste. A growl rumbled through my chest at the taste of her.

I was done waiting.

I snuck my hands back under her skirt and ripped her underwear off her. She gasped against my mouth, but quickly recovered and followed my lead. Reaching down, she slipped her hands under the waistband at my backside, helping me slide my pants and briefs down just enough.

My cock was finally free from its painful confinement and she began rubbing herself against it. The feel of her wet cunt gliding so easily against me with no barrier was so carnal it sent my brain into a blissful haze.

I wished I could see her cunt swallowing my cock, but there was no time for that. So after I positioned myself at her entrance, I grabbed her hips and thrust fully into her. She cried out so loudly, I almost came right then and there.

She squeezed her eyes shut and arched into me, rolling her clit against my pelvis. I groaned. “That’s it, pretty girl. Keep riding me just like that.”

She gripped my shoulders as I continued to fuck her while she rode me. We were both breathing hard and the smell of sex permeated the air. Our moans and grunts filled the car as she took my cock like a good fucking goddess.

Her breasts swayed up and down as she bounced on my dick and my head spun into oblivion.

“Ah fuck,” she whimpered. “Right there.” Her voice floated around me, but I was too far gone. So I focused on thrusting up into her again and again, hitting the same spot that seemed to make her lose it.

“God, you feel so amazing,” I said to her before crashing my lips onto hers.

Sex had always been just sex, but this. Fuck, this was almost fucking magical.

Her cunt squeezed me and I slid my tongue inside to meet hers as she cried out. Her nails dug into my shoulders and her orgasm took over. I could feel her soaking my cock and that was all it took for my own pleasure to come crashing down.

I spilled into her and kissed her through the final waves of our orgasms.

Our lips pulled apart and we panted against each other’s mouths.

This was….

Fuck.

When we both came down from our high, we finally looked into each other’s eyes.

What a fucking sight she was.

Cheeks flushed, messy hair, and lips swollen.

“That was…” She trailed off, giving me a smile. And this one might have been my favorite out of all the ones she’d given me tonight.

“Yeah.”

The air around us shifted, but unlike the uncomfortable silence that usually followed moments like these, this one was blissful.

She placed a soft kiss on my lips and lifted herself off me. As she moved to the side, I reached for the console and grabbed tissues. I wanted to do it but didn’t want to overstep, so instead, I handed them to her. She cleaned herself off as I tucked my wet dick back into my pants, not wanting to rid myself of her yet, and pulled my pants up.

We both leaned against the back seats and stayed quiet for a moment. I didn’t want her to leave, but she would have to eventually and I might not see her again.

I glanced over at her and found myself asking her something I told her I wouldn’t. Something I promised myself I wouldn’t. “What if I wanted to see you again?” I whispered, almost hoping she didn’t hear.

She turned her head to the side and faced me, shock painting her features at my confession. “We agreed to one night.”

“I know what we agreed on, but what if…” I trailed off, not sure what exactly I was asking her for. My life didn’t have space for a relationship. My job didn’t leave room for one. But… I groaned internally. I didn’t know.

All I knew was that one night with her wasn’t enough.

Her silence tightened the flesh around my lungs and suffocated the previous peaceful air that had settled around us. But I didn’t look away. I wanted to see the truth behind whatever answer she would give me.

“I’d break your heart,” she said, letting out a soft laugh to dissipate the growing new tension.

I shook my head softly and whispered, “It’s already broken.”

I’d lost everything I’d ever loved.

My father didn’t want me and my mother eventually left me.

Sorrow filled Mia’s eyes and I looked away because I didn’t want her pity.

I felt her move beside me until she hovered slightly over me and placed a soft kiss at the edge of my lips. “I’m sorry,” she said as her goodbye before leaving the confines of my car and shutting the door behind her.

I didn’t move and kept an eye on her as she stepped onto the sidewalk of the main street in front of the bar and hailed a taxi. Once one halted in front of her, she opened the door. I waited for her to step inside, but she paused, a hand resting on the roof of the small red cab.

I hoped she would chance a glance over here, but after a brief moment, she climbed in and shut the door behind her.

When the taxi pulled away from the curb, I stepped out from the back seat and climbed into the driver’s seat. Later that morning, after I finished unpacking and settling into the apartment I had on the Academy’s premises, I went to bed dreaming of the green-eyed pretty girl I met at a bar, wondering if I would ever have the chance to see her again.

Not knowing that I would come face to face again with her the next day.

With her as one of my new students.