Chapter 4
CHAPTER 4
AMALIA (PAST)
“It’s already broken.”
His words replayed in my mind so much I barely slept. I kept thinking about the way he looked at me. The way that one unruly strand of his lush brown hair rested on his forehead when he turned to face me. The way his dark brown eyes pinned my green ones as he waited for my answer.
The way the underlying pain in his voice made me feel something I’d never felt before and I didn’t like it.
Because I wanted to say yes to his proposal. I wanted more than one night to learn his real name and what he was about. But that wasn’t how I worked.
That wasn’t what I was here for.
Even if he was the best sex I’d ever had.
Even if I could still feel him between my legs even after I’d showered and washed myself of him when I came back to the dorms well after curfew. Even if I could still feel the way his lips left mine bruised and how my scalp still tingled from how hard he gripped the back of my skull as he kissed and fucked me.
The urge to touch myself to the memory had been strong, but I didn’t want to face a lawsuit from my colleague sleeping right above me on my first day here.
I’d tossed and turned until the early morning light filtered in through the curtains. I looked over at the clock on my small bedside table and noticed I had about two hours before we had to show up for our first class.
Hoping a run would help clear my mind before the day ahead, I quietly rolled out of bed and walked over to the small dresser where I had to make all my clothes fit. I grabbed a deep brown workout set and slipped into the bathroom, carefully closing the door behind me so as not to wake Stella—my roommate for the next year.
She’d been sleeping when I came back last night, which was a relief. I’d only briefly spoken to her when I’d arrived two days ago and she’d seemed cordial enough, but I’d rather avoid any questions about my whereabouts. Judging by her quiet nature, I didn’t think she would have questioned me, but one could never be too careful here.
One thing I’d learned early on in this journey was that appearances were almost always deceptive.
I quickly changed into the matching set I’d picked—a long-sleeved top and high-rise biker shorts—and threw my hair into a ponytail. After splashing my face with some water, I slathered moisturizer and sunscreen on my face before tiptoeing toward the door, making sure to avoid the one creaky floorboard.
I fastened my shoes on, grabbed my headphones from my duffel bag near the entrance, and slid out of the room, heading for the field at the back of the facility. Once outside, a gust of cold wind rolled over my body. I brushed my hands over my arms a few times to warm me up a little as I glanced around to see if anyone else was out here.
Relieved no one else was in sight, I put my headphones over my ears and took off, the music slowly pumping to match the rhythm of my beating heart.
As I jogged, I realized I hadn’t had a chance to explore the premises since my arrival. So I took a left turn into an unbeaten pathway that eventually led into a forest behind the Academy.
Down the track, the path opened up onto a road that curved alongside the ocean. Echoes of waves crashing against the shore beneath filtered through the music. The soothing sounds acted as a balm and all my worries and uncertainties of what was ahead faded away.
I’d spent the last few weeks training and studying the material in advance for this year since I knew I’d need any extra advantage I could get. I’d always been a good student, but it hadn’t been easy. Especially when it came to memorizing documents and a lot of this job required it.
Deciding not to dwell on the fact, I pushed myself harder as I looped around and back into the forest to head back before everyone woke up. Once I got closer and saw the Academy on the horizon, I slowed to a stop, chest heaving.
I turned off the beat drumming in my ears and wiped the sweat beading across my forehead with the end of my sleeve as I walked toward the back doors.
Once inside, I turned right and headed down the hallway toward my room, listing what I had to do in my head before going to class. I was so lost in the task that I hadn’t noticed the man in front of me until I slammed into the hard body.
Fingers wrapped around my upper arms to steady me. A groan left my lips when I looked up and I realized who it was.
Just what I needed.
Asher Williams, the twenty-five-year-old son of the Academy’s director and the most annoying person I’d ever met.
We had attended the same international school in Bemes and I had the unfortunate luck of having a few classes with him despite him being three years older since he’d dropped out for a few years for reasons that were still unknown.
I’d done my best to limit my interactions with him since he was well-known for his promiscuous reputation, but unfortunately for me, one drunken night after our high school graduation and a bad decision later, I’d found myself stuck with his constant flirtatious nature asking for round two.
I thought I’d rid myself of him after graduating and moving back home for university, but much to my dismay, he’d decided to follow in his family’s footsteps and join the Academy despite most thinking he’d keep spending his father’s money on a beach somewhere.
I’d known I might eventually run into him, but our class was big enough that I could have avoided him. To think I was almost to my room.
Guess my bad luck strikes again.
His eyes trailed down my body and he let out an appreciative hum. “Look who we have here,” he said, gracing me with his signature smirk. “The one and only, Amalia Abara.”
“Williams,” I said in a clipped tone, shrugging him off me.
He shoved his hands into his pockets and stood to his full height. “What’s a man have to do to get a text back from you?” he asked as he trailed his eyes down my body.
Asher had been trying to ask me out since that night, but I’d decided it would be simpler to just ignore him.
Out of sight, out of mind.
Until now.
I sighed and kept myself from rolling my eyes at him. “I have to go,” I said and brushed past him, walking away.
“One day, I’ll get you to say yes,” he said right as I closed the door to my quarters behind me. I dropped my head against it, looking up at the ceiling.
To whoever’s up there, keep him away, please.
“Sounds determined,” a voice chimed, startling me from my supplication.
I looked over to find Stella sitting on her top bunk, already dressed with her laptop opened in front of her.
I shook my head and gave her a small smile. “You could say that.”
She returned her attention to her screen and said, “You should get ready. We have to be in room 34B by eight a.m.”
I looked down at my watch to notice that I only had fifteen minutes to shower and change. Fuck . I didn’t realize I’d been gone for so long.
I tossed my headphones and watch on my bed and rushed to my dresser to grab our uniform—black cargo pants and a gray T-shirt. Stepping into the bathroom, I locked the door behind and climbed into the shower after throwing my workout clothes into the hamper in the corner.
After quickly washing my body, I dried myself off and changed into my clothes for the day. I brushed my teeth and washed my face before applying my skincare.
After looking at myself in the mirror and noticing the sleepless lines covering my features, I brushed a small coat of mascara over my long lashes and swiped some lip balm over my lips. Then I pinched my cheeks to give myself a bit of color to my cheeks and stepped out of the bathroom to find Stella already gone, a steaming cup of coffee sitting on my nightstand in her wake.
I might grow to like her.
I chugged a few sips, ignoring the burning sensation from the steaming liquid, rushed to slip on my sneakers, and scrambled out the door with five minutes to spare.
“Happy to see that I’m not the only one who’s about to be late on their first day,” a voice chimed next to me as I pulled a small satin headscarf past my forehead and fastened it to keep my wavy hair out of my face.
I looked to my right to find a pretty tall blonde with dark blue eyes smiling at me. She was wearing the same attire as me, her long hair pulled into a ponytail.
“I hope for both of us that’s not the case,” I responded as we rounded the corner and walked down the corridor that would lead us to room 34B.
She extended her hand and introduced herself. “Isabella Smith. But my friends call me Bella.”
I took her hand in mine. “Amalia.”
She let go of my hand once we got to the door and opened it for me, letting me in. Chatter echoed in the large room and I looked over at all the recruits forming a group in the middle of the room. “Oh, I know. Top of your class at Navarra and most coveted recruit this year. Your reputation precedes you,” she said as we walked into the crowd to stand amongst them.
I scrunched my nose and glanced at her, letting out a small laugh. “I hope that’s not a bad thing.”
I’d spent the last few years training for a spot at the Academy and I’d worked hard to come here, but I didn’t want the attention that came with it. Because attention meant expectations, and with expectations came the burden to be flawless.
I was far from that.
She gave me a small smile. “Not at all.”
The conversations suddenly grew dimmer when the door on the other side of the room opened and a pair of footsteps grew closer to where we all stood. I couldn’t see who it was yet in the midst of the sea of people standing in front of me.
“Also,” Isabella continued as she leaned down closer to be at my ear level. “You should hide that,” she whispered.
I glanced at her to find her pointing at my neck. Heat rose up my chest and I brushed a hand against the side of my neck, remembering last night. I was in such a hurry this morning that I hadn’t noticed if the stranger from last night left any marks on my body.
Despite my secretly hoping he did.
She let out an amused chuckle. I tugged my shirt up, hoping to somehow hide whatever mark she was referring to, and turned my attention to the front.
Nerves slithered through my veins in anticipation of meeting our new instructor. His name preceded him and he was a legend here. I rarely admired anyone, but his accomplishments alone made me want to make a good impression.
I’d spent most of my life trying to find where I fit and figure out what I was good at. Teachers and people around me had always looked down on me, telling me I’d never achieve anything because I didn’t excel in the department they deemed important.
My older sister had worked two jobs to support me and my brother after our mother had abandoned us when I was fourteen years old to find herself . So the pressure to succeed at something, anything , had weighed heavily on me. She’d given up so much to raise us, and I’d made it a mission to get better grades and find what I would do for the rest of my life.
It had been a daunting task, but when the Academy had a guest lecturer speak at Navarra during my first year there, I knew at that moment that I would do everything I could to get in.
Being here would grant me opportunities I wouldn’t get otherwise and, besides, kicking ass for a living didn’t sound too bad. As my therapist would say, channeling the anger I harbored against my dead-beat parents into something good was a step in the right direction.
The heavy footsteps came to a halt and everyone straightened their spines and put on their best faces, hoping to impress him.
A girl in front of me let out a low whistle and murmured to the girl next to her, her voice barely above a whisper. “I’d heard he was gorgeous, but holy fuck.”
I knew of Noah Brown, but since he’d allegedly refused to be photographed, I’d never seen what he looked like. But from the small glimpses I could grasp between the towering bodies in front of me, she was right.
I couldn’t see his face yet, but my attention snagged to his body. His navy shirt molded to his arms, and the sleeves were rolled up, giving a delicious view of his forearms.
I’d promised myself last night would be the last time for a long time so I could focus on training, and he was my teacher, but that didn’t mean I couldn’t look.
He finally cleared his throat and the murmurs around me came to a full stop. “All right, everyone, welcome to the Academy. I’m Agent Noah Brown and I’ll be your instructor for the duration of your time here,” a strangely familiar deep voice said.
The girl in front of me moved, finally giving me a full look at the person standing in front of us.
My throat closed up and blood pounded in my ears, the whooshing sound blocking out anything that was being said next, if he was even saying anything because I could barely focus on breathing.
My lungs seemed to collapse inside my chest, making it impossible to take a deep breath as I awaited the inevitability of his gaze landing on me. And when his eyes finally met mine, my vision narrowed and memories of our night came crashing back in a full tidal wave.
His mouth on me, his cock inside me while I rode him, his lips devouring mine as I experienced the hottest night of my life.
And his parting words.
“It’s already broken.”