37. Miller
I can’t be in a long-distance relationship with you.
The words keep circling in my brain. Isn’t that what we’ve been doing, with the texting and the phone calls and the FaceTime chats? Or is it different now that there are feelings out in the open?
I slump into a kitchen chair with a sigh. Becca left a couple hours ago to drive back to Syracuse before the traffic got too bad. I already miss here like crazy.
“You want some French toast?” Mom asks, glancing over at me from the stove. “I’m making some for Jordan. I can make extra.”
I shrug, not really all that interested in food. “I guess.”
She pauses. “You okay? What happened with Becca?”
“She didn’t like the flavored lube.”
Mom’s eyes widen. “What? Oh, shit.”
I snort. “That had nothing to do with it, or at least she didn’t say that. But really, three flavors?”
Mom turns back to the pan. “I like to offer variety. It’s called being a good host.”
I don’t think an etiquette book would recommend providing three kinds of flavored personal lubricant and a thirty-six-pack of condoms, but that’s Lori Quinlan for you.
“She had to head back to school,” I say.
“So why do you look like your dog died?” She flips the egg-soaked bread. “It seemed like you two were having a good time last night.”
Thinking about last night almost has me getting hard again. “She doesn’t want to do a long-distance relationship.”
“Oh.” Mom slides the French toast onto a plate, her lips thinning into a line. “Jordan, your French toast is ready!” She looks over at me. “Can you get the syrup out?”
“No words of wisdom to offer?” I stand from the table and cross the kitchen to pull the syrup out of the fridge.
She soaks another piece of bread in the egg mixture. “Not really, actually. Being in med school has to be tough, and adding a long-distance relationship on top of it? I can see where she’s coming from.”
I set the syrup in front of Jordan, who has taken over my seat, and sit down in a different chair. “I can, too. I was just hoping she’d consider it.”
“Well, would her answer be different if it wasn’t long-distance?”
I pull on the back of my neck. “I don’t know. I didn’t ask. But she’s kind of stuck in Syracuse for now with school.”
Mom looks over her glasses at me. “And are you stuck in Philadelphia?”
CARD SHARKS
How was everyone’s Thanksgiving?
Blake: Eh, it was fine. Went out to Denver to see Lawton and his girlfriend for a little bit.
I thought he was living in some small town now?
Blake: He is, up in the mountains. They came down to Denver for a few days. Apparently, there’s nothing but snow and ice up there this time of year. Well, most of the year.
Maddox: Holly said that since she can’t drink, no one could drink. It was a very tense Thanksgiving.
Cam: That’s putting it mildly. Between pregnancy hormones and wedding planning nonsense from Addie…
Cam: But Judy’s turkey is still the best, so I’ll take it.
How many more weeks of this?
Cam: Till next fall.
Not until your wedding, you idiot. Until Holly has the baby.
Maddox: About two months. It feels like it might as well be next fall.
Maddox: You should get your girl knocked up so you can experience this joy, too.
Never been so thankful that Mom put condoms in my bathroom.
Blake: She bought you condoms?
And flavored lube.
Cam: What flavor?
There were three options. But now we’re at another sticking point with my girl. And she’s not my girl, not really yet.
Cam: What are you waiting for?
Cam: Addie and I were an item after like one week.
Blake: One week and thirteen years.
Cam: Same thing.
I’m not waiting, you idiots. I laid it all out there, told her I liked her, that I wanted a relationship.
Maddox: And?
She doesn’t want to do long-distance.
Cam: Christ, you’re an idiot.
And you’re an asshole. What’s your point?
Cam: Why would you give up now? You worked so hard to win her over in the first place. The distance seems easier to fix than when she hated you.
I slide my phone back into my pocket, thinking. Maddox and Cam’s attachment to their women is clear, even over text. Maddox may whine about Holly’s pregnancy cravings and hormonal mood swings, and Cam might bitch about the pains of wedding planning, but they both have stars in their eyes while they do it.
They’re so in love with their women. And no little hiccups like cravings for pickles and chocolate sauce or dress-related meltdowns can change that.
And is distance really that much more insurmountable than what they’re dealing with?
I spend the next couple of hours clicking through things on my phone while I let old episodes of JackAss play in the background. A frustrating number of businesses are closed the day after Thanksgiving, but there are a few of them open. Enough to get the information I need. And a lot of things can be scheduled or started online.
I don’t know if it will be enough, or where this is heading. But I know what I need to do.