Chapter 13 #2
"Well, Summer said something else that really got me thinking.
She said, 'What if she never speaks? Is that really going to be so bad?
'" She sighed and then looked up at Jack, meeting his eyes.
"I know you're her parent, and maybe it would be a terrible thing for you, but I was just thinking, it's not that bad.
Sure, I'd like to see her speak. I think life would be better for her if she were able to communicate that way with people, but.
.. why do we always insist that whatever is wrong needs to be fixed?
Why can't we just be happy with the other things that we have?
She's healthy, she's doing well in school, she has friends, even though she doesn't talk, and she's got a really awesome dad who cares about her deeply and who is sacrificing his own dreams to make sure that she has the heritage that was given to her by a mother who obviously adored her as well.
She has so many things going for her, and yet all of us are focused on the one thing that she doesn't have, which is speech. "
Jack was speechless. Literally. He had never even considered that.
"What if someone just focused on my faults? I've got a bunch of them, and what if that was what everyone saw when they looked at me? What if that was what everyone was trying to make better? Not that we shouldn't try to help someone who needs it. It's just..."
"I totally get what you're saying. We have a tendency to focus on the negative."
"Exactly. And kind of parallel to that, it's a belief that I've held for a while, and that is that a person can be happy, no matter what their circumstances are.
It's like the joy of the Lord—we have it with us all the time; sometimes we just choose to look at how terrible everything is, and we forget that we have a choice.
The choice to be happy, the choice to be content, like Paul talked about.
We just want to get things fixed first."
That hit Jack hard. She hadn't said it in so many words, but in the back of his head, he was resentful that he had to give up his farming dreams and do the candy cane shop. But could he really be happy being a candy maker for the rest of his life? Could he give up the farm completely?
The idea was novel, and he figured he would need to think about it, but in reality, Kate was right.
"The Bible says, 'Whatsoever thy hand findeth to do, do it with thy might.
' And you're right, Paul says to be content in whatsoever state you are.
We're also supposed to focus on the good things, the true and lovely things, and yet in my life, and with my daughter, I've been focusing on the things I don't have. "
"I think that's a natural human tendency, which is probably why we needed the command in the Bible.
We needed something to tell us that we're focusing on the wrong thing and to shift our eyes to where we need to focus, which is Jesus first, because when we look at Jesus, all of the other things that seem so pressing and urgent kind of fade away. "
"Definitely. They definitely do."
He was quiet for a while, just thinking, thoughts turning in his head. Kate had really shifted the way he had been thinking and the way he knew he needed to see things.
What if he put his whole heart and mind and soul into loving candy making? What if he went all in on candy canes? What if he sold his half of the farm to his brother and chose to be happy right where he was?
The idea was so foreign to him that he almost recoiled from it. But this was what God had given him to do. Couldn't he do it with all his might? Couldn't he do it with the joy of the Lord? Couldn't he do it with contentment and happiness?
The rest of the evening was fun companionship as they finished up the dishes, and then he started showing Kate simple candy-making techniques.
He knew that she would be completely new to everything, so he'd chosen the simplest of the heritage candy canes to start on, and by the time midnight rolled around, they had three batches finished and wrapped and ready for display.
"That's a really nice thing about candy canes. They don't go bad, and they don't get old. So those can sit there for as long as we need them to."
Kate untied the apron that he'd given her and pushed her hair back with her other hand. "They're so pretty, I almost hate the thought of anyone eating them. I feel like we should just sit here and look at them."
There seemed to be a warm, happy atmosphere in the shop, even though they were probably the only ones still open on the street. He hadn't turned the sign or locked the door, but they hadn't had a customer since Lilly had gone to bed.
"I've had a really good time tonight." That was probably inappropriate.
Not only was she helping him in the shop, but she was also working with his daughter.
He probably needed to maintain a more professional distance.
"And we got a lot of work done. That’s such a relief.
I felt like I was drowning in all the things I needed to do, and now I feel like I have breathing room. "
Maybe she wanted him to say more—he wasn't sure, because she had looked a little disappointed when he shifted the tone of his conversation—but surely she would want to keep things professional as well.
He didn't know if the school had any protocols about employees dating or being involved with the parents of their clients' kids, but he didn't want to get Kate in trouble.
Not when she had just moved to Mistletoe Meadows.
"I better get going. I didn't realize it was almost midnight." She sounded a little breathless, and he wondered about that too.
"Thank you." He wanted to go on and on, but he didn't want to keep her, although he didn't want her to leave either.
"I appreciate being here. I've never looked at candy making from quite this perspective before, and it's new and fun, especially when you finish and you have a product that is as beautiful as those are." She nodded at the candy canes that sat on the counter.
"I suppose when you say it like that, it is a pretty awesome job."
Her eyes narrowed, as though she were trying to see what was behind his words.
He wasn't even sure himself, although their conversation from earlier in the evening ran loud in his head.
He wanted to be content. He wanted to do what God had given him and not insist that he needed to do what he wanted.
Still, the idea of giving up farming was hard, but it was like Kate said—making candy canes was definitely rewarding.
He just hadn't been focusing on the right thing.
"Do me a favor and text me when you get home. I hate the thought that you're leaving here so late, and something might happen."
"I'll text you. It only takes about ten minutes to get out there, and you should be hearing from me shortly." She smiled. "Have a good evening." With her hand on the door, she paused for a moment, before, with a jingle of the bells above it, she disappeared.
He stood in the shop—the warm atmosphere, the soft lighting, the scent of sugar and candy in the air, and the beautiful wrapped candy all around him—made him feel warm and cozy and happy. Happy in a way he hadn't for a long time. Maybe lighter too.
Lord, I think you knew just what I needed when you sent Kate into my life. I needed a perspective change; I needed to be looking at you instead of myself. I needed... I needed some fun and laughter too. Thank you.